u/OkGur7242

I found it with my teeth.

At first I thought it was an overcooked nut, so I ate around it. Little did I know...

As you can see in the second picture, the first guy tried gaslighting me and accusing me of manipulation because I called him out on being a dick.

This took me five hours to make please appreciate it

I’ve been having this recurring fantasy for a long time and it’s gotten to the point where I’m actively thinking about it instead of just daydreaming. There’s so much emotional weight that I’m carrying around constantly from the pain I’ve suffered, and I feel like my environment and the people in it are a constant reminder of it. Even the people who haven’t done anything wrong.

I feel like staying in contact with my abusive family is slowly poisoning me, even though they don’t hurt me anymore and things are good now. I know if I try to have a discussion about what they did they’ll just deflect and make it seem like my fault. I guess I’m too scared to rock the boat.

I’m tired of my abusive ex boyfriend being a constant weight over my head. I’m sick of staying in the same town where everyone knows what happened between us, and I have a perpetual reputation as either “that idiot who dated Chandler” or, thanks to him, “the whore of Babylon” because he told everyone I’m a giant whore because I dated other people after I broke up with his shitty ass.

How was I supposed to know what a healthy relationship was at 18 after a whole childhood of emotional trauma and abuse? How was I supposed to know that dating him was a bad idea when at the very least he was nice to me at first, which my own family wouldn’t even do. I had no friends out of high school either because my life was so vastly different from everyone else.

I’m doing better now. I have my own apartment and I’m financially independent. My relationship with my family has improved significantly. I have a lot of friends who I know care about me.

But still.

I want to get away from everything.