u/Ok_Builder_3285

I’m a loser with women. A complete failure with women. I got divorced 5 years ago and haven’t been on a date.

Post-divorce I’ve traveled quite a bit, not for the explicit reason of meeting women. I did have the apps on while I was on foreign countries l, went out, etc. and I never even came close to meeting a woman.

So my question is how does this actually work? How do you even come into contact with women? Know I’ll be alone forever unless I figure out some drastically different alternative.

I think I’m done

I think I’m just done with everything.

I’ve posted before but today is the worst day in a while. I’ve tried everything. Nothing works. I’ll get criticized and told to keep trying then get criticized for doing the same things over and over again.

I got divorced 5 years ago after 20 years. I’ve been terrorized by my mentally ill addict ex and whatever psycho she is dating at any given moment the entire time.

In that time I’ve advanced in my career. I just got a promotion - but I’ll never have life changing money.

I’ve had my kids full time for the last 3.5 years. I know some day they’ll appreciate what I’ve done for them while their mom is doing ….whatever it is she does, but at the moment they hate me for being the only adult who tells them to eat their veggies, brush their teeth, when it’s bedtime, do your homework, etc. They tell me they hate me every day.

I haven’t been on a date since I got divorced and I haven’t touched a woman for 6.5 years. I know that will never change.

I try to force myself to do things sometimes but I just hate everything. In the end it’s just not worth it since I don’t enjoy anything and the kids are just pissed at me for getting a sitter.

I just hate my life. I hate myself. I hate every minute of every day at this point. The constant exhaustion, constant anxiety, constant isolation. Knowing that I’ll never have anyone, knowing that I’ll never have a life. There’s just no point and I can’t keep doing it. I don’t know that I can take another 35 or 40 years of pain and misery. Honestly, why should I?

I’ll obviously make sure the kids are ok, but I guess I’m just done. Misery is all I’ve got and it’s all I’ll ever have.

I post on here because I don’t know any divorced people. I don’t know anyone who struggles. Everyone I know is in a long term relationship. Nobody I know understands what I’ve been through.

I think I’m just done with everything.

I’ve posted before but today is the worst day in a while. I’ve tried everything. Nothing works. I’ll get criticized and told to keep trying then get criticized for doing the same things over and over again.

I got divorced 5 years ago after 20 years. I’ve been terrorized by my mentally ill addict ex and whatever psycho she is dating at any given moment the entire time.

In that time I’ve advanced in my career. I just got a promotion - but I’ll never have life changing money.

I’ve had my kids full time for the last 3.5 years. I know some day they’ll appreciate what I’ve done for them while their mom is doing ….whatever it is she does, but at the moment they hate me for being the only adult who tells them to eat their veggies, brush their teeth, when it’s bedtime, do your homework, etc. They tell me they hate me every day.

I haven’t been on a date since I got divorced and I haven’t touched a woman for 6.5 years. I know that will never change.

I try to force myself to do things sometimes but I just hate everything. In the end it’s just not worth it since I don’t enjoy anything and the kids are just pissed at me for getting a sitter.

I just hate my life. I hate myself. I hate every minute of every day at this point. The constant exhaustion, constant anxiety, constant isolation. Knowing that I’ll never have anyone, knowing that I’ll never have a life. There’s just no point and I can’t keep doing it. I don’t know that I can take another 35 or 40 years of pain and misery. Honestly, why should I?

I’ll obviously make sure the kids are ok, but I guess I’m just done. Misery is all I’ve got and it’s all I’ll ever have.

I post on here because I don’t know any divorced people. I don’t know anyone who struggles. Everyone I know is in a long term relationship. Nobody I know understands what I’ve been through.

45m, divorced 5+ years ago after 20 years with my ex.

I've taken very piece of advice I've come across and I still get almost no matches and literally zero dates in 5 years. I get maybe one or two matches a month. I have a conversation maybe every 4 or 5 months. Zero dates from any of it.

I've got a stable, secure career. I am a great dad. I am fit. I have friends and hobbies (no women at the hobbies). On paper, I feel likeI should be at least getting some interest from someone. There is just nothing though.

Any advice on what to do when absolutely nothing works?

It’s always the same. I just had a date cancel on me at the last minute. I get very few likes and most of those never respond (which I know is common). Anyway, first like/match that had a conversation with me in 6 months. We had nice conversations on the app, exchanged numbers, planned to meet up for a drink tonight. I have my kids full time so I got a sitter who is already here.

She texted that she wasn’t feeling great 30 minutes before the date. I was very polite about the cancellation, like always. No big deal. If she’s sick then no reason to be rude. If she’s decided she isn’t interested then no reason to be rude.

The thing is that this always happens. I have been single for 5+ years and every date has cancelled or stood me up. Granted it hasn’t been that many since I don’t get any likes anyway. What do I do? How am I supposed to do this if no woman will even have a conversation with me in person?

Before I get the comments, no, I didn’t do anything weird, aggressive, or sexual. I didn’t send d** pics, I never have. I didn’t ask for pics.

Now I’ll go sit in a bar somewhere by myself like the loser that I am for a few hours since I’ve already paid for the sitter and told the kids that I had plans. All I really want to do is go to bed.

It’s always the same. I just had a date cancel on me at the last minute. I get very few likes and most of those never respond (which I know is common). Anyway, first like/match that had a conversation with me in 6 months. We had nice conversations on the app, exchanged numbers, planned to meet up for a drink tonight. I have my kids full time so I got a sitter who is already here.

She texted that she wasn’t feeling great 30 minutes before the date. I was very polite about the cancellation, like always. No big deal. If she’s sick then no reason to be rude. If she’s decided she isn’t interested then no reason to be rude.

The thing is that this always happens. I have been single for 5+ years and every date has cancelled or stood me up. Granted it hasn’t been that many since I don’t get any likes anyway. What do I do? How am I supposed to do this if no woman will even have a conversation with me in person?

Before I get the comments, no, I didn’t do anything weird, aggressive, or sexual. I didn’t send d** pics, I never have. I didn’t ask for pics.

Now I’ll go sit in a bar somewhere by myself like the loser that I am for a few hours since I’ve already paid for the sitter and told the kids that I had plans. All I really want to do is go to bed.

It’s always the same. I just had a date cancel on me at the last minute. I get very few likes and most of those never respond (which I know is common). Anyway, first like/match that had a conversation with me in 6 months. We had nice conversations on the app, exchanged numbers, planned to meet up for a drink tonight. I have my kids full time so I got a sitter who is already here.

She texted that she wasn’t feeling great 30 minutes before the date. I was very polite about the cancellation, like always. No big deal. If she’s sick then no reason to be rude. If she’s decided she isn’t interested then no reason to be rude.

The thing is that this always happens. I have been single for 5+ years and every date has cancelled or stood me up. Granted it hasn’t been that many since I don’t get any likes anyway. What do I do? How am I supposed to do this if no woman will even have a conversation with me in person?

Before I get the comments, no, I didn’t do anything weird, aggressive, or sexual. I didn’t send d** pics, I never have. I didn’t ask for pics, I never have.

Now I’ll go sit in a bar somewhere by myself like the loser that I am for a few hours since I’ve already paid for the sitter and told the kids that I had plans. All I really want to do is go to bed.

S