u/One_Sale_9660

I know this is a cliche, but I really don't feel my age.

I'm retired and sometimes get a little bored.

I'm married, but feel my marriage is stale - it hasn't been fun for a lot of years.

It would be nice to have a person or persons to chat online with, to brighten the day a little - maybe have a bit of a giggle. What makes you chuckle?

I'm not looking for anything beyond online chat, but that chat can go anywhere you're happy for it to go.

We are currently touring around Italy. This morning, as we were driving, I asked my wife; "Do you think I'm driving too much like an Italian now?". She replied; "You must have taught them everything you know."

OK, so I'm 68 but I really don't feel it. I don't feel much different in myself than I did in my 50s.

I'm not looking for face-to-face meetings or hook-ups. Just friendly light-hearted banter with maybe a bit of flirting thrown-in if you're comfortable with it.

Now for the honesty....... I'm married. But we might as well be miles apart, and I get no affection - which I really crave. I have no intention of blowing-up my marriage just because I don't find my wife fun anymore.

If you fancy discreet online chatting, ladies, I would love to hear from you. You can set the rules, and you don't have to tell me anything about yourself you aren't happy to divulge.

She hasn't had to fret about caring for her mother. She hasn't had her friends constantly on the phone with their woes. She hasn't ​had to rush here there and everywhere. For six whole days she has been able to relax.

Has it changed anything between us? No. 😟

She's still as distant as she always is. Doesn't come to me with any affection. Doesn't say anything that lets me know she cares. She'll tell me she loves me if I tell her first.

I'm still ​feeling just as lonely as I do when she has all the distractions I mentioned above.

Have I not given it long enough for her to start to relax? Her life normally is fairly intense, is a week not enough for someone to wind-down?

It has been such a help to know there are so many people in similar situations to me. I can't believe there are as many women as men, I really thought being LL was a woman thing. Ladies, I apologise for misjudging you!

Has anyone here found chatting 1:1 has helps​ them cope? I'm not meaning counselling, just talk between two people going through similar circumstances.

I'm on a self-guided holiday exploring countryside I have never seen before. It is well known among my family and friends that I hate cities.

Several people have asked where ​I'm staying tonight. When I told them the city I'm staying right on the edge of, they replied "Have you been to the cathedral?" or "You must see the cathedral".

Just because I'm in the vacinity of a building you happen to like doesn't mean I'm going to go see it myself. Why should I? I'm not here to see a collection of stone blocks, I'm here for nature & to be away from hustle & bustle.

Why is that so difficult to understand, and why try to make a Federal case out of it?

OK, I'm an idiot. I know that, you don't need anyone to tell me.

I was posting on r/sexlessmarriage and I got a few chat requests. All but one I ignored. The one I didn't ignore I left for a few days, maybe a week. Then I checked "her" profile and there were a handful of posts she had made - all on r/sexlessmarriage. So I thought what the heck, I'll hit her up.

Yes, by this time I had already ignored red flags.

Anyway, within a few hours we had moved our chat to Whatsapp. The following day that chat had become explicit. More red flags ignored. Then I stupidly joined-in.

Long and short of it after another couple of days she tells me she needs money and needs it quick. Now I'm between the rock and a hard place. She could have already got screen grabs of our chat - but she's not going to admit it, is she?

My real name is unusual, so I didn't use it on Reddit or Whattsapp. But then I made the fatal mistake of telling her my real name. Hell! What do I do now? My wife is on Whatsapp, FB, and other platforms under her real name.

Thinking this is going to get out of control very quickly, I panicked. I sent the money by PayPal, even though the PayPal address she gave me looked dodgy.

After that, I deleted my Whatsapp, and Reddit accounts. When "she" realised my Whatsapp was gone, she texted me, and I blocked it unread. Right after that, she phoned me and I dismissed the call and blocked the number. Now I'm just waiting for the inevitable e-mail, because she will have my e-mail address from my PayPal.

I don't care about the money. What I do care about is the fragile remains of my marriage if my wife somehow reads that Whatsapp content. I'm hoping that it will all go quietly away, but I'm equally scared it is going to blow-up.

Please people, think very carefully before responding to chat requests. I always thought I'm not gullible, but I was sucked-in so easily.

All the time I've been typing this, I keep asking myself "What if she really was genuine, and the sob-story she spun was real?" But in my heart of hearts I'm 99% certain it wasn't.