Loss after loss. Now losing hope

January I gave birth to a sleeping baby boy at 36 weeks. He was perfect but came too early. It was the hardest thing I have ever gone through and I am desperate for another baby. We managed to conceive in May but that tragically ended with an ectopic pregnancy...and I lost my right tube with it. All this under 6 months. Our next step is IVF but even that is a massive hurdle.

I'm sinking lower and lower into depression. I've lost my social life and old me is gone. Nobody I know understands what I'm going through and how hard it is to keep going and not knowing what the future holds.

I am just so sad I don't have a living child and Ive lost all hope after my second loss. I just want to be a mummy. I really scared it will never happen as I'm already 36 years old.

Please can somebody give me some hope. I really need some positive stories. I'm honestly just really heart broken.

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 17 hours ago

Bleeding after throwing up

I ate a bit too much for dinner and felt really sick. I ended up throwing up over the toilet. Not long after, I started bleeding down below. I am crying like crazy because I'm so scared. Im 7 weeks pregnant. I should not have tried to finish my dinner when I was feeling sick. Really beating myself up for it.

Has anyone else bled after vomiting? It's dark red...

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 10 days ago
▲ 1 r/TCM

Are these herbs safe for pregnancy?

This is from my TCM clinic. Just want to double check with another professional if this is safe for early pregnancy. AI is telling me some of the herbs contain blood movers which isn't suitable.

菟絲子 (Tù Sī Zǐ) – Dodder Seed 紫參 (Zǐ Shēn) – Red Sage Root (Salvia Root) 續斷 (Xù Duàn) – Teasel Root 蓮子 (Lián Zǐ) – Lotus Seed 砂仁 (Shā Rén) – Amomum Fruit (Cardamom) 廣香 (Guǎng Xiāng) – Costus Root (Aucklandia Root) 熟地黃 (Shú Dì Huáng) – Prepared Rehmannia Root 桑寄生 (Sāng Jì Shēng) – Mulberry Mistleto 女貞子 (Nǚ Zhēn Zǐ) – Glossy Privet Fruit 陳皮 (Chén Pí) – Dried Tangerine Peel 炒白朮 (Chǎo Bái Zhú) – Stir-fried Atractylodes Root

u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 11 days ago

3rd IUI faint line

Triggered 24th May 11pm IUI on the 26th May 12pm

I had one large follicule (18mm before trigger) and 2 smaller ones (14mm before trigger)

I took mucinex this cycle and was on progesterone after IUI.

I didn't test out my trigger but my doctor told me to take a test 2 days after missed period. I THINK its 16dpo... It depends when I ovulated after my trigger and if the smaller ones caught up in the end?

I thought I was out as I had brown spotting on 12dpo and some cramps. But I did get a faint line on test day. It's not super light but it's not darker than the control line. Probably like 50% dark? I tested again the next morning and it was the same. Guarding my little heart. My last pregnancy, the test line up as so dark!

I feel soooo tired. Exhausted. Body temp has risen and elevated heart rate according to my Oura.

Anyway, i'm on my way to get a blood test. I'm so scared.

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 24 days ago

Ovidrel for implantation?

I always thought ovidrel as a trigger shot but my doctor prescribed me two shots 6dpo and 10dpo. I looked online, it's to help implantation.

Has anyone had any experience? I feel so nauseous after one shot 🤢

I'm scheduled a test 16dpo. Concerned about false negatives now

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 1 month ago

I want to cry so badly but I cant because of Zoloft

Its so weird. I'm 5 months post loss. I can finally function a bit better since taking a low dose of Zoloft daily. I have more energy to do things. My mood is better. My relationship with my husband is better. But my body seems to want to cry but can't. I know I feel sad inside but it's not there. It's just such a weird feeling....

Sucks that I have to choose between feeling numb or be sad forever

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 1 month ago

Hate Public holidays

I went in for a scan today. 2 follicules on my right (17mm, 13mm) and one on the left (13mm). 11mm lining

I have one more stim tonight (Saturday)

Trigger on Sunday night

PUBLIC HOLIDAY on Monday (grr)

And IUI scheduled for Tuesday morning

I am worried about timing 🥹

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 1 month ago

Should I still track during IUI

Hi guys, just want to ask for some advice or opinions

I'm doing medicated IUI this cycle with hormone injections. Is there any point still tracking my hormones with Mira or would it mess things up with my data? Im cycle day 5 at the moment, just finished my period.

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago

Menopur only IUI

Has anyone had any experience with Menopur only IUI? I asked for medicated cycle thinking I'd be prescribed clomid or letrozole but I ended up with Menopur 225 for 5 days starting cycle day 2. Back for a scan on day 7. Doctor said I've got good amount of follicules at baseline.

Curious why he skipped the oral meds completely

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago
▲ 3 r/zoloft

Guilt and Grief

I've been heavily greiving my son for the last 4 months and finally decided to try antidepressants. I've been on Zoloft 25mg for only 2 days and I already feel better. That's a bit quick? But now I'm starting to regret taking it and feeling fine. I think I miss the sadness because reminds me of my son. Isn't that a bit messed up?? I don't know if I should continue taking it or give up 😞

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago

Medicated cycles

I've done 2 unmedicated cycles so far, both failed. My doctor previously said he doesn't want me to try medicated due to the risk of twins. I had a previously high risk pregnancy before resulting a premature SB and also, I am petite with a tall husband.

After the failed IUI, he said I could try a little bit of medication, not too much but it's entirely up to me. I don't know what that means.

I just want to ask, how high are these risks? What are your experiences of multiples. It seems most people do medicated cycles here. Should I just do it to increase my odds? I really want to be a mother again.

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago

Medication

What medication (anti-depressants) can I take that won't affect my ttc journey? I'm 4 months post loss and I think I'm falling deep in depression. I thought I was doing better in the last month or so 😢 then boom, back down the sad rabbit hole again

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago

Why do you test after ovulation confirmation?

If Mira isn't good for tracking pregnancies and BFP, why do I need to test after my ovulation has been confirmed? Won't I be wasting wands? Please inform me what info I am missing out on

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u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago

Should I be worried or do any further testing?

Mira is telling me my FSH is higher than average.

I'm 36. Cycle day 19, 6DPO.

u/Outrageous-Part6931 — 2 months ago