u/ProfessionalSea8004

Hi everyone! I’m a 20-year-old university student currently living in a small studio flat with access to a communal lounge. I love hosting friends and family—especially visitors coming from out of town—and often have group gatherings of 5+ people over at a time. However, the severe lack of space is becoming a major issue. My studio can’t comfortably fit more than one person overnight, and having guests sleep on the couch in the communal area leaves them completely exposed with zero privacy, making overnight visits really uncomfortable and awkward. To be honest, I would just love a bigger space, so I’m considering moving into a 2-bedroom flat. They typically go for £1,100–£1,200 per month excluding utilities in my area. Since my current rent is all-inclusive, I’m not sure how much standard bills (electricity, gas, water, internet, etc.) usually cost each month. Below is a breakdown of my current monthly budget—based on these numbers, would moving into a 2-bed flat be a smart financial decision

Living expenses
Rent
£850
Food
£200
Home essentials
£25
General spending
£150
Phone
£15
Apple (storage)
£3
Prime
£9
Spotify
£6
Netflix
£6
Apple (insurance)
£10
laundry
£40
Transport(uber)
£30
ring
£5
bus pass
£40
Curry’s
£20
Total
£1409

Income
£2300

Spending
Living expenses
£1409
loan
£100
Emergency fund
£100
ISA
£200
General savings
£150
travel
£100
Gift fund
£50
Shopping fund
£50
Nails
£70
laser
£35
brows
£15
total
£2239
Left over
£21

Hi I’m 20f I have no desire to live I’m tired of the pain, the guilt and the suffering. I just wanna be beside god already but Ik if I unalive myself I won’t get the one thing I desire the most. I have no idea what to do I’ve felt this way for half my life and I honestly don’t think I have another decade left in me. There’s always one problem after the other I honestly feel like I’m cursed. Whenever life seems like it’s getting better it just gets worse I’m so tired I’m so tired of being depressed , having anxiety, I’m so tired of my OCD and how it’s ruining my life. I want to have an amazing future i want to be a successful engineer a mother a wife but I don’t think i can endure this pain long enough to see this future I desire. I want to be at peace.

Why does god forgive us for all our sins and how does he choose who’s forgiven.

For a little while now I’ve been trying to figure out if when we die we lose all our memories does that mean our current self goes to heaven/hell or is it just our soul cause our memories do make up who we are as a person.

Which takes me to my next question if we go to heaven or hell does that mean it won’t actually be our current self going so does it really mattter if we suffer or enjoy when we die as it won’t be us

Psa I’m a Christian who believes in heaven and hell and I’m currently doing everything in my power along with the guidance of Chris to ensure that I can experience everlasting life I’m just asking this question out of curiosity

Hi everyone, I’m a 20-year-old female looking for some advice and perspective. Growing up, I identified as Christian, but my faith was pretty lukewarm. I never really had a desire to lose my virginity—partly due to trauma from being sexually assaulted at a young age, and partly due to an early exposure and addiction to pornography, which I have since overcome. I always thought I’d wait for marriage, but it was more out of self-protection than religion. Shortly after turning 20 (before I truly committed my life to Christ), I started dwelling on the fact that I was still a virgin. I began feeling "behind" compared to my non-religious friends who were all sexually active, especially since I've never been in a serious relationship. Peer pressure got to me, so I tried to change that. I went on a date with one guy, drank, and went back to his place, but I couldn't go through with it and we just cuddled and fell asleep. Later on, I drank too much with another guy, and he ended up coming back to my place where we made out passionately, though nothing more happened. Even though we didn't have sex or oral sex, both encounters left me feeling awful and overwhelmed with intense guilt and shame. Here’s where I’m struggling now: since truly giving my life back to Christ, I’ve suddenly developed the strongest urge to lose my virginity, even though I know deep down that isn't God's plan for me right now. I have an upcoming trip planned with a close guy friend I haven't seen in ages. I really want to go and see him, but I’m terrified that I might let these new desires and lust take over while we're together. Has anyone experienced a sudden spike in temptation after coming to Christ? How do I navigate this trip, guard my heart and body, and handle these feelings? What should I do?

Hi everyone, I (20F) am looking for urgent advice regarding a dangerous situation with my younger siblings.
have six siblings in total—three live on their own, and three still live with my mother (a 13-year-old boy and two younger girls). Growing up, my mother was physically and mentally abusive and severely neglectful, often leaving us completely unattended or with strangers so she could go out. Tragically, her neglect directly contributed to me being sexually assaulted when I was younger.
Now, history is repeating itself. My mother left on a trip that will last anywhere from a few weeks to a couple of months. She has a friend of hers watch the kids, but she leaves every single night for work. This leaves my 13-year-old brother, my two young sisters (who are now the exact age I was when I was abused), and the babysitter’s own child completely alone overnight.
I am terrified for their safety and wellbeing. My gut tells me I need to contact social services immediately, but I feel overwhelmed. Is calling child protective services the right move here?

So I just found out that I’m not eligible for student finance due to lack of proof of my citizenship, how else can I pay for my student finance? PSA I can’t take out a loan

I’m 20F and honestly feel like I’m not enjoying my 20s the way I’m "supposed" to. I’ve realized I really don't like clubbing or drinking. I love the idea of staying out all night with friends and having a couple drinks , but the reality is always a letdown. I wake up the next day feeling awful, regretting the money I spent, and feeling totally drained by the low-effort attention from guys at the club. I like attention, but not the cheap, hyper-sexualized kind you get in those environments.

Dating feels just as exhausting. Whether it's apps or in-person, 9/10 guys just want a hookup or will play the long game just to get into bed. I want to save my first time for a committed, meaningful relationship, which makes navigating today's dating culture feel impossible.

It leaves me wondering if people actually enjoy this, or if we're all just pretending. Even my grandma pressures me! If she finds out I'm home on a Friday night, she tells me I'm wasting my youth.

The thing is, I do have a life. I love the gym and I’m a total hobby-hopper—I love trying new activities every month. I do plenty of things outside of drinking, but I just can't seem to force myself into the standard dating and clubbing culture. Anyone else relate?

Hi everyone. I’m a 20 f , and honestly, I feel completely stuck. I actually do know what I want to do with my life, but there are so many barriers in my way.

To summarize a very long story: I’ve had a deeply toxic, abusive relationship with my mother, who always prioritized men over her children. Because of this, my education was severely delayed (for example, I had to take my GCSE’s over a year late). I’ve since cut ties, live completely on my own, and support myself.

Now that it’s finally time for me to go to university, I’ve hit a massive wall. I’ve done my research and I’ve found out that I’m ineligible for Student Finance (which now means I cannot pay for uni or receive any financial support while studying )because I don’t have a passport to prove my status. I can’t get a passport because my mother doesn't have the necessary documents, and because I left my country of origin, I can't go back to get them. I’ve been in the UK for five years now and have spent a decade trying to sort this out with barely any progress.

Because of this passport issue, I’ve had to pass up incredible opportunities, like degree apprenticeship with one of my dream company. Major employers won't hire me in my chosen field without it.

It’s so disheartening. I have the grades. I’ve done everything right. It feels like every time I take one step forward, I get dragged five steps back. I am just so exhausted and fed up. Has anyone dealt with something similar in the UK or is there any other routes I can take to pay for my tuition.

I’m just going to clear a couple of things up

So my situation is very niche. So I was born in 2006 and there was a law at the time that if your parents do not have full Irish citizenship you are not eligible for an Irish passport, even if you’re born in the country. At this time, my birth, my father had his full Irish citizenship he had the passport while on the other hand my mother had her refugee status. If my mother had applied for my passport prior to my father’s death , I would have no issue getting a passport, but she decided to apply for my passport when he hadn’t moved to another country to spend his last days. Because of this it has been virtually impossible to retrieve any of his documents and because my mother did not have her for Irish citizenship at the time of my birth, I am not eligible for an Irish passport now what most people are doing in this situation is apply to get naturalised but because I am no longer in Ireland and I haven’t been there for over five years I cannot apply to get naturalised and if I wanted to get naturalised I’d have to go back to Ireland and I’m unable to do so because I don’t have my passport and a lot of airlines have stopped people from travelling between Ireland and the UK without a passport and if I was to decide to take the ferry there is a chance they might ask me for my passport and because I don’t have it, I may get detained and put in a immigration camp until they can verify my immigration status. So yeah, this is why I cannot apply for my Irish passport.

Hi everyone. I’m a 20 f , and honestly, I feel completely stuck. I actually do know what I want to do with my life, but there are so many barriers in my way.

To summarize a very long story: I’ve had a deeply toxic, abusive relationship with my mother, who always prioritized men over her children. Because of this, my education was severely delayed (for example, I had to take my GCSE’s over a year late). I’ve since cut ties, live completely on my own, and support myself.

Now that it’s finally time for me to go to university, I’ve hit a massive wall. I’ve done my research and I’ve found out that I’m ineligible for Student Finance (which now means I cannot pay for uni or receive any financial support while studying )because I don’t have a passport to prove my status. I can’t get a passport because my mother doesn't have the necessary documents, and because I left my country of origin, I can't go back to get them. I’ve been in the UK for five years now and have spent a decade trying to sort this out with barely any progress.

Because of this passport issue, I’ve had to pass up incredible opportunities, like degree apprenticeship with one of my dream company. Major employers won't hire me in my chosen field without it.

It’s so disheartening. I have the grades. I’ve done everything right. It feels like every time I take one step forward, I get dragged five steps back. I am just so exhausted and fed up. Has anyone dealt with something similar in the UK or is there any other routes I can take to pay for my tuition.

I’ve had to rewrite the post caused I feel like I left a lot out. And I want to add that I take full accountability for the state I was in I shouldn’t have drank when I hadn’t eaten or slept properly.

Hi everyone, I’m a 20F and I’m dealing with a really confusing dilemma right now.
The other night, my friends and I had a last-minute night out. I hadn’t eaten all day because of work and only got about two hours of sleep the night before, but I felt fine during the day. I managed to eat a tiny bit of food before we started pregaming. I blame myself for not taking better care of myself before drinking, but what happened next has left me really confused and uncomfortable.
Without me realizing, one of my friends added extra vodka to my BuzzBall. I recently found out that the person who altered my drink was actually one of the male friends in the group who I know has a crush on me (based on jokes he's made and the way he looks at me sometimes). I honestly don't know what his intentions were, and it's just weird to me that he would add extra liquor to my drink without telling me.
On the way to our destination, we all shared another small bottle of vodka. I was fine for about an hour, but then I randomly started throwing up and completely blacked out. This is so unlike me—I can usually handle way more alcohol, and I’m completely embarrassed and I’m defo not drinking for a year.😭😭
My current issue is the fact that I woke up dressed in my pajamas in my own bed. While I believe my friends had good intentions—they probably just wanted to get me out of my vomit-stained jeans—I still feel weirdly violated. I am comfortable in my own body, except for certain scars that prevent me from even wearing shorts.
There were five of us in total: three boys and two girls, all my age. When it came time to change my clothes, the same guy who has a crush on me and altered my drink insisted on being involved. I found out that while my female friend was buttoning my pajama top, he was the one taking my trousers off, and he ended up seeing my chest.
It makes me feel sick to my stomach to think about. To be clear, he is a good friend and has never given off "predator" vibes before, and I am grateful that the group got me home safe in one piece. But I feel incredibly uncomfortable knowing that he was pushing to change and bathe me, and that he saw me exposed while I was completely passed out. I really would have preferred it if they had just left my clothes on.
I don't want to slander him, and I've already thanked them and promised to cover them next time we go out just to keep the peace. But I haven't voiced my actual concerns because I honestly don't know how to.
Is it weird that I feel upset about this? How do I even bring this up to them?

Edit

You guys are scaring me in the comments. I highly doubt I was drugged, and even if I was, the window for testing has already passed. I am also 100% not an alcoholic; I barely ever drink

To clear up a few things about the environment: We were pre-drinking at my own place, which is why I felt so safe, and I never usually leave my drinks unattended. There was only one other girl there besides me.

I’m not saying that him putting extra vodka in my BuzzBall is the sole reason I blacked out—I know lack of sleep and food played a massive part. I just find it genuinely weird that he would add it in the first place without telling me.

That being said, I am still extremely grateful to my friends for bringing me home safe and wiping me down. They didn’t have to do that, and I know they cared about my safety. My only issue is the boundary crossing with the clothing change, not that they are bad people.

Hi! I'm a 20F, and this whole dating thing is completely stressing me out. I recently started taking dating seriously by downloading Hinge and going out with my friends more.
Up until last month, the most I'd ever done with a guy was hold hands for five minutes.
But recently, everything changed. I spent a night cuddling with a guy I've known for a bit (who is significantly older than me and lowkey felt sick for a week after this), and I also spent a night making out and straddling a guy I met at a club (which I enjoyed way more than I expected!).
Everything happened on my own terms with the help of alcohol , but now I'm juggling three different guys, and I don't know what to do:
• Guy 1 (Hinge): We have a lot in common and I feel like we'd get along great. We have our first date this weekend.
•Guy 2 (Met out): We already went on one date. He is so sweet, I feel a genuine connection, and I'm really comfortable around him. Date number two is coming up.He’s just a little older than me
• Guy 3 (Club make-out): He's super attractive, sweet, and has amazing eyes. We have a date this weekend, but honestly, I don't see us lasting long-term and feel like he'd break my heart. But weirdly enough I feel like I have to make things work between us(idk if it’s because of how intimate we got)
All of them have been super respectful, but my issue is idk what to do next.How do people manage this? WHY IS DATING SO COMPLICATED?? It’s times like this i wish i had a big sister or some previous experience with this

(First of all, thank you all so much for the advice it has truly taken a huge weight off my shoulders.
do want to clarify one thing it’s not that I’m ungrateful for the attention. It’s that my entire worldview on dating and intimacy has been shaped by some really heavy things. To give some context on why dating gives me such bad anxiety. I dealt with being over-sexualized and experienced SA as a child. On top of that, I’ve never actually been around a healthy, successful relationship in my real life. Social media doesn’t make it any better as it constantly push the idea that if a man doesn't buy you an expensive bag, kissing him makes you "easy." And because of this and the “strict” christen values I grew up with I've been conditioned to believe that intimacy automatically reduces my value as a woman. In reality, I want to experience intimacy with someone I connect with even outside marriage or a proper relationship but the fear of losing my "value" keeps me terrified of going all the way. Because of my lack of experience, I'm still fighting a lot of internal judgment. Another thing is due to my lack of dating experience l've made mistakes that younger me would shame me for (like getting intimate with someone I met a the club and although I enjoyed that encounter I still feel a small amount of shame and disgust.)

I’m stuck between choosing Mmu or Salford for mechanical engineering

Does university of Manchester do clearing for foundation year mechanical engineering