URGENT HELPPP!!! Stuck in a brutal loop of severe addiction, and a wasted drop year for NEET now faking college. Now, wasting another. URGENTLY NEED SOME ADVICE TO COME OUT.
Title:
Hey everyone. I need some brutal honesty and practical advice because I am completely drowning right now.
I’ve been dealing with a severe porn addiction coupled with prone masturbation (rubbing against the bed) since I was around 13–14. By class 9, the porn addiction completely took over. By the grace of god, I managed to score over 90% in my CBSE boards, which gave my parents confidence over me.
But already things have collapsed. My first NEET drop year was a total disaster. I wasted every single day repeating the same cycle—most critically destroying the afternoon exam time slot (2:00 PM to 5:00 PM) and late-nights up to 2:00 AM—engrossed entirely in searching for erotic content and mast****ting.
Now, I'm in my second "pseudo" drop year for NEET.
- The Reality: I am not studying at all. Days just vanish.
- The College : I enrolled in a B.Sc. Zoology Hons program, but I haven't attended a single day of college. I am lying to my parents, making them believe I am fully dedicated to NEET prep.
- The Tests: I haven’t even attempted a single mock test from the Allen and Aakash test series I purchased. Financial constraints mean offline coaching isn't an option for me anymore.
- Physical Toll: Lately, I've started noticing physical issues, like trouble getting or maintaining an erection, which is terrifying and adds to the mental panic.
I am trapped in a loop of guilt, anxiety, hiding the truth from my parents, and immediately escaping back into porn whenever stress hits. I want to break this cycle, fix my daily routine, address the health concerns, and figure out how to salvage my life—whether that means coming clean to my parents or finding a way to actually study.
If you have broken out of a similar cycle of severe addiction and academic burnout, how did you take the first step? Where do I even begin?
NEED HELP REALLY ! ON HOW TO GET OUT OF THIS.
P.S.- NO CHANCE OF LEAKING MY CONDITION TO MY PARENTS, SINCE, THEY ARE BURDENED WITH THEIR OWN PROBLEMS I.E. MY CANCER-AFFECTED MOM.