u/Retiredpartygirl17

Hi friends! Will be at Guadelupe NP tomorrow and wondering if anyone has suggestions on things to do with a dog. I’m guessing it’ll mostly be scenic drives which is fine!

Sigh 🫩

THIS IS NOT MEANT TO TRIGGER ANYONE. This is also not to say that alcoholism is not real. I have addictions to other substances that I know with 100% certainty I can never go back to. And I can’t even say for sure that I will never binge drink again. It may be right around the corner and I’m just unaware.

But after being a crazy party girl in college, always the one blacking out and being a mess, I got sober at 24 and stayed sober for about 1 year and 3 months. I felt my interest in staying sober from alcohol disappearing about 1 year in. It was super scary because I was always taught you relapse in your mind way before you actually take the drink. But all my brain wanted to focus on was the major milestone of hitting year 1, and I had no clue what was gonna happen after that.

While I was on a solo trip, I decided to get a bottle of wine to drink at the end of the day in my hotel room. (Yeah I’m aware drinking alone is a big concern, but tbh I wanted to try it out before telling anyone I drank, probably problematic lol) I had two glasses and didn’t even really feel anything before i showered and got ready for bed. I went to sleep with most of the bottle still left. I did the same thing the next night, a glass and a half. I didn’t pass out from the liquor, I even watched a whole movie after screwing the top back on. Now I’ve done this probably 5 more times and never had the desire to get more drunk or finish the bottle.

Now I’m just in a really confused place. I’m starting to think I was never really an alcoholic, just someone who struggled to cope during a very low point in my life. It makes me angry to think of all of the things I started believing about myself while in AA that may have never been true. I wonder if I just wanted to feel included in a community where I wouldn’t be judged? I’m not sure. My therapist made multiple comments through our sessions that she didn’t think I was an alcoholic, but I always assumed she just thought that a reasonably attractive young girl couldn’t be an alcoholic.

I do prefer the feeling of being sober at this point so I have no plans to really drink often unless it’s offered to me or a special occasion. I never stopped smoking weed so maybe that’s part of my problem too.

Idk. Just feeling frustrated and confused

Do you know what else endangers children? Taylor

Currently in an uber as a passenger, my driver has been nearly screaming in a foreign language on the phone with god knows who for the last 40 minutes. I just find it so disrespectful and rude. I’m paying $70 and I can hear you screaming through my headphones. You wouldn’t do this at any other place of work, so it’s so irritating. She also missed 3 turns from not paying attention and didn’t even get me to the right spot. Sorry not sorry will be leaving a bad review

That’s it, that’s the post

“You are such a good mother Tay ❤️” how have we gotten so lost that we applaud a mom who has physically abused HER CHILDREN on Mother’s Day. I literally don’t feel safe in the world. Am I going actually insane because WHAT THE FUCK

sorry I’m gonna lose it. I actually don’t care what Dakota did to her at all, nothing excuses throwing chairs at people/ physically abusing them especially near a child. The amount of people who have conveniently forgotten that she’s a serious threat to her children’s safety and a physical abuser is WILDDDDD to me. No, I will never be “team Taylor” GROSS