u/Safe_Tomatillo_9742

I‘ve come to the cunclusion that I‘m an FLVE (ENTP SP7 too so that checks out) before this I was reading the description and researching the types VLFE, FLEV and some more until I finally started researching how Attitudinal even works.

Throughout all of this I find the FLVE description, while true; to be incredibly negative and almost insulting compared to the others, is this just the 3V effectiong all other places or bias from the authors

(sry for bad englisg)

I remember when I was 10-14 always hiding from people around me, my mom always telling me that I was disgusting and a useles parasite and my father that if I didn‘t get good grades no one would even care about me once I was a disgusting worthles beggar. Then at school I‘d either get excluded or bullied either way I could see people face of disgust when talking to me, they‘d be weirded out by my thoughts and feelings and manner of speaking.

After some time I just realized that no one is ever gonna love me for myself and that what I feel and think and have to say is ultimately worthles, and that people only value me for my social performance not my internal life.

So when I was 15 I decided that if what I stated was true I would need to believe that everything I did was justified, I started taking advantage of people any way I could and just started seeing people as things that serve me and my self preservation, thanks to all of this I am now a complete paranoiac, I am angry, aggressive and borderline violent with some people and completely cowardly
with others, I am constantly seeking threats and ways people could abandon me because I genuinely dont think they see me as worth beyond my utilities.

I am constantly shaking, often the pressure inside of me builds up and I let out a supprized scream, my back is always strained and in generall I just feel like I am suffering through so much Bullshit, can anyone relate?

I‘ve seen some weird obsession with ESTJs on this Sub lately, especially from the most common internet types (INFJ INFP INTP ENTP ENFP INTJ) and these weird formulations about ESTJs being their enemy. And while I do symphasize with having someone bash you with a ruler over the head, I not only think that this angle of viewing the least represented type is accurate in any way shape or form.

Looking at the cognitive functions stack the ESTJ Leads with Te making them oriented towards efficiency. This is followed by Si parent which support their ambitious indevors with past experiences and resourced, asking the people that came before you what you ought to do. Their child function is also Ne which allows them to considere different perspective and their inferior Fi allows them to explore themselfs and their values.

Finally I‘d js note that their demon function is Fe meaning that though they are aware of the social setting they dont trust it and avoid using it, only resorting to this when highly stressed.

Taking all of this into consideration we find a type that is marked not by a desire to humiliate or to bully but rather to improve the processes that are at place, pointing out inconsistencies and inefficient actions. IMO the reason ESTJs get hated on the most is because most people would rather idle in possibilities and make belief, or hide behind soft social cushons than face the truth of what HAS to be done.
Obviously ESTJs when unhealthy aren‘t really allat nice, but what type is even??? In my life they have been a bit harsh with me but I always saw them as people who deeply cared and it was always obvious that they did it out of percieved necessity and not hatred. I also greatly admire their conscientiousness

(also any type can be a rule influcting, authoritarian conformist bully)

(ENTP sp/sx738 FLVE sp7w8 chol Sang)

I fucking hate my sp3 fix in my tritype, fuck the heart triad it’s such a piece of shit. I already have the sp7 disintegration into a sp1 and working hard everyday as well as always being anxious about the future and not being poor, but on top of this I get this perfectionistic image conscious dipshit in my tritype. Couldn’t it have been a sp4 or a sp2 instead??? Why in the name of god do I devote all of my self esteem into how „competent“ I am being percieved as??? Didn’t Father all mighty know that he was making the most useless narcissistic clumsy malintegrated person with me??? I can’t naturally study for a long time, am incredibly sensitive to stress, have a lot of psychoticism and personality issues and it feels like I am constantly at the edge of sanity js to underperform below everyone!!!

And dont even get me started on the disintegration lines, whenever I am stressed put I either revert to sp1 and js torture myself and set unachievably high standarts or (in REALLY intense stress) I js completely get off the grid and do nothing besides indulging in my own lethargic sensuallities, idly wasting away! A few days ago I had an exam which I was going to fail, and this way fine since I had already failed this shit subject and didnt need to do anything, however since it was a presentation I was suppost to fail infront of my teacher! SO EVERYTHING WAS GOING TO PLAN AND THEN WHEN I NEEDED TO GO TO MY HUMILIATION RITUAL I DIDN‘T AND INSTEAD SAT MY WORTHLESS ASS DOWN ON THE TOILET AND PRETENDED IT WAS FUCKING WEEKEND AND NOW I DONT KNOW IF I WILL BE KICKED OFF OF SCHOOL BECAUSE I WAS SO SP9 DISTRACTED THAT I WILLIBGFULLY DIDNT RETURN THE DIRECTORS CALLS AND HE CALLED FOR HOURES 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😡😡🤬😡😡

# IN DEM FACH MATHE SRY SMMSMSMSMSMS

Danke an alle die da haben oder das Linken können kann das nirgenswo finden