u/Sensitive-Fennel-487

Please understand I’m writing this with no offense, I’m genuinely curious, I want to know and I don’t have anywhere that I can ask about this.

Shortly my question is that if white people are really afraid of being seen as a bad person from others. I’m not sure if it depends on where you’re from or what culture you have or it’s related to being a Christian?
I’m from east Asia but had lived in a western country for a few years and have interacted with people who are from different countries.
I’ve dated Asians and whites, and realized that when they did something wrong or something not good, the reactions are very different. White guys be like “I’m sorry but I’m not usually like this… I don’t want you to see me as a bad person.. you know I’ve done those nice things for you too right? (Like telling me to see their good sides and try to let me think they’re good ppl?)” something like that. Asians be just saying sorry, explaining why but saying less excuses and cared about how I feel the most? Even the level of what they did isn’t different (it’s not cheating or as big things as it.

Or even between friends, I’ve experienced similar stuff that I’ve never experienced with Asian friends.
Also I saw many crime documentaries where white criminals desperately say “I’m not a bad person!!” while admitting committing murder. I watched many Asian documentaries too and ofc they make excuses to try to get less sentences but they don’t say “I’m not a bad person.”

The only thought I have is that white people like to make others happy. They give compliments to strangers on street or in small talks which I really like and adore them about. Which makes me think that also they like to being seen as a nice person so they can’t stand the idea someone see them as a bad person?

Again, I don’t wanna offend anyone, but if you have any perspective on this, please comment and let me know. I wanna know as many perspectives as I can get.

I mean even Matthew’s not his real father, so Natalie’s basically nothing to Theo, isn’t she? Also Natalie told Joe that Matthew hasn’t seen him much so did she…

After everyone found out Natalie was killed by Gil, Theo took break from the university due to the stress. Like why? Just go to school, kid? Or was he too sensitive?

Disclaimer: it’s not a core or important topic but I’m curious

After Joe&Love&Henry moved to a suburb from LA in S3, both Joe and Love didn’t have a job for a long time. Yes Love just gave birth, and they can live in a huge house with the Quinn’s money but that’s really how they live? Also neighbors didn’t think it’s weird even though they knew Love’s family was rich?

From the middle of S3, Love opened a bakery but Joe? Working for the library was mentioned as a volunteer. He did some book-maintenance thing to send money to Ellie but how much can he make from that? Even he once stole an expensive book from the library…so it means he didn’t have anything he could do a maintenance and sell

I met a guy on bumble in japan. I’m Japanese and he’s European, both of us are 25yo. We were so similar and really clicked each other fast, texted a lot since the very beginning and we planned the first date. He’s in Tokyo, I live two hours away and i was kinda busy so the date was three weeks after we matched. Until then we texted and started video calls a lot even the first & second calls lasted four hours, telling very personal stuff already. He did an exclusive talk within a week. He said he thought I was the one and I thought same (we both love HIMYM so we talked about that stuff often). So we didn’t just flirt each other, talked about our future too (I know it happens in every early stage, but it was like an actual discussion not just dream talking.) He told me he could already say he loved me but I stopped him because I didn’t wanna rush this even tho I was sure, and he understood that.

On the first date, he was sick but he came, we went to a restaurant and it was great, same as texting & calls. After we got his place, I found the toilet seat was dirty so I opened the shelf above looking for some wet wipes.
Then I found the new period pads. I asked him if he had a gf now because I knew he moved in the current place after he broke up with his ex. He said no he was lazy when he moved, so he put everything in the boxes didn’t throw anything away. And HE offered me to see his phone to prove he doesn’t have a gf. So I went it through, it was very clean, so I told him I trust him now. But then suddenly he was like “you don’t trust me until you saw my phone :/“ so I explained how I feel and how impossible I can just trust him after I found it. He didn’t get it but we went to sleep because he said he got sleepy (he was sick so I think it’s valid). And it was awkward in the morning too and we just said goodbye at the station.

We kept texting a few days very minimum things, but then he just ghosted me no text back. The reason he turned off was very stupid and I still don’t understand, so I was disappointed in him but anyway I knew I couldn’t fix it so I just texted him a closure “thanks for everything” stuff but he didn’t even reply back to that…. I know it was a short period, but I just can’t believe someone can be this rude to other person as an adult… like at least he could’ve told me he didn’t wanna continue this? Is he fucking psychopath? Why do ppl ghost others? So immature.