u/Shepsinabus

There might be a better sub for this, but I'm trying here first. I am about to rent commercial space for my small business for the first time ever. It's a big, empty unit that needs everything except the exterior wall drywall, plumbing, and electrical to be completed. This means: Flooring installed, interior walls put up, HVAC run through the unit (furnace/ac comes with the space; the ducts would be my responsibility, as they have to be configured to however I lay out the space).

The property is roughly 900 sq. ft. and has 10 ft. ceilings for some context.

I met with a contractor who seems great. He was recommended by someone I trust dearly, and the quality of his work I've seen is fantastic.

I have never rented commercial space or done anything like this before, so I'm trying to figure out what is normal and what is not.

The contractor asked my budget for the leasehold improvements, which I told him was roughly $50,000. He came, saw the space, and emailed me saying he was ready to get started and needed a deposit since we agreed on the budget. But, to me, we didn't agree on a price. I want to know what the actual costs will be, not just "here's my full $50k, please spend it all."

Is it normal to ask for a quote that's broken down? I want to see the material cost, and the labour cost. I also want to know the impact of certain material choices on the overall cost.

For context, I have priced out some materials so some of those costs are:

- approximately 1000 ft.² of vinyl flooring, which is approximately $5,000. ($3.28/square foot plus tax, over estimating)
- light fixtures are approximately $1700 after taxes. There is no installation cost as electrical work is included by the landlord.
- doors for the offices. Each door is approximately $500 after tax. Again, I am overestimating. there will be four doors required, so $2000

There will be other things that I don't know the price of like:

- framing and drywall for three offices. This will include four walls that are 9 feet long and one long wall connecting all of the offices that is approximately 23 ft.
- permits
- paint
- running ductwork (landlord is providing a furnace and heat pump for air-conditioning)

I am leaving the ceiling unfinished for an industrial look, but we will be painting it black.

I know that there are a lot of variables, and there is probably some information that would make this post more helpful. Overall, I’m just trying to wrap my head around what a reasonable price for this work would be.

If it truly is a $50,000 project, fine. But that is the absolute top of my budget and I am worried that things will come up during the build that will make it more expensive.

Was I a Karen or is this legitimately not my problem?

Last night I placed a grocery order with Walmart to be delivered today between 8 and 9 AM. I was scheduled to start work at 11 AM and had to leave the house by 10:30 AM to get there.

At 8:30 AM, I received a message that my order was delayed and would not be arriving until between 11 AM and 1 PM. My order had things like fish, dairy, and frozen items. It’s 28°C (83°F) here today, so it’s stinking hot.

When I saw the reschedule email, I called the local Walmart to ask if I could choose a new time because it was just going to ruin the food. They said I had to call Instacart, so I did.

I don’t have an Instacart account, and did not realize that Walmart has a third-party service provider for their deliveries.

I was concerned about was food arriving on my front doorstep after I had gone to work and baking in the sun all day. I would have to return everything that melted or was perishable to Walmart anyway, so I thought I would call to schedule a different time so there was no food waste.

Also, I get that shit happens and sometimes there are delays. No problem at all. I didn’t want to cancel, I wasn’t pressed that I wasn’t getting my groceries right then, I just wanted to set a later time so the food wouldn’t spoil on my porch.

The person on the phone told me it wasn’t possible unless I accepted a $15 “change order” fee. I said no, I chose a time and gave myself an hour and a half of a buffer, this was on them, and I was not going to pay a service fee because they weren’t able to meet the order timeline. I wasn’t asking to cancel, just to push it back to 6 PM or later. They suggested if I wasn’t ok with the $15 reschedule fee, I could cancel which would have a $25 cancellation fee.

I said no, this is their problem to solve because the delay was not my doing, and Instacart needed to find another solution because I wasn’t willing to pay a fee.

The staff member then said I was entitled, that they don’t make special exceptions because I can’t adjust my schedule, and this is their policy. She also said they have my card number on file so she can charge me whatever fee she wants.

I let her know that the call was being recorded and not to speak with me like that or I’d file a complaint (I live in Canada, we have one party recording consent, and I was calling from my work cell phone which automatically records calls. I was not maliciously recording). She told me it was illegal, I said it wasn’t, and reminded her that Instacart was also recording the call so it shouldn’t matter.

She then shrieked that I was threatening her, yelled at me about her privacy rights, and that she was going to ban me from their service. When I say shrieked, I mean literally ear piercing screaming at me.

I said “If you ban me from grocery delivery over this, this call goes on the internet.” She shrieked again, said I’m violating her charter rights and the company policy, I’ve been banned, and hung up on me.

I ended up calling corporate Walmart, they were understanding and able to cancel the order without a penalty fee. The person I spoke with was super helpful and agreed it was just going to waste money, food, and that it was them who made the time change so they will make it work. Great. It got resolved and I resubmitted the order just fine for an afternoon delivery, so I am not banned apparently.

But I’ve been replaying this in my head. Was I the problem on the Instacart call?

I know everybody says they aren’t the problem, which is why I want to know if I have blinders on. Genuinely I was not rude or combative until she called me entitled.

The local Walmart conversation was pleasant, the corporate Walmart conversation was pleasant, but the Instacart one seemed unnecessarily aggressive and dramatic.

Am I the asshole here? 😬

Last night I placed a grocery order with Walmart to be delivered today between 8 and 9 AM. I was scheduled to start work at 11 AM and had to leave the house by 10:30 AM to get there.

At 8:30 AM, I received a message that my order was delayed and would not be arriving until between 11 AM and 1 PM. My order had things like fish, dairy, and frozen items. It’s 28°C (83°F) here today, so it’s stinking hot.

When I saw the reschedule email, I called the local Walmart to ask if I could choose a new time because it was just going to ruin the food. They said I had to call Instacart, so I did.

I don’t have an Instacart account, and did not realize that Walmart has a third-party service provider for their deliveries.

I was concerned about was food arriving on my front doorstep after I had gone to work and baking in the sun all day. I would have to return everything that melted or was perishable to Walmart anyway, so I thought I would call to schedule a different time so there was no food waste.

Also, I get that shit happens and sometimes there are delays. No problem at all. I didn’t want to cancel, I wasn’t pressed that I wasn’t getting my groceries. I just wanted to set a later time so the food wouldn’t spoil on my porch.

Person on the phone told me it wasn’t possible unless I accepted a $15 “change order” fee. I said no, I chose a time and gave an hour and a half of a buffer, this was on them, and it was not going to pay a service fee because they weren’t able to meet the order timeline. I wasn’t asking to cancel, just to push it back to 6 PM or later. They suggested if I wasn’t ok with the $15 reschedule fee, I could cancel which would have a $25 cancellation fee.

I said no, this is their problem to solve because the delay was not my doing, and I wasn’t willing to pay a fee.

The staff member then said I was entitled, that they don’t make special exceptions because I can’t adjust my schedule, and this is their policy.

I let her know that the call was being recorded and not to speak with me like that or I’d file a complaint (I live in Canada, we have one party consent, and I was calling from my work cell phone which automatically records calls). She told me it was illegal, I said it wasn’t, and they are also recording the call so it doesn’t matter.

She then shrieked that I was threatening her, yelled at me about her privacy rights, and that she was going to ban me from their service. When I say shrieked, I mean literally ear piercing screaming at me. I said “If you ban me from grocery delivery over this, this call goes on the internet.” She shrieked again, said I’m violating her charter rights and the company policy, I’ve been banned, and hung up on me.

I ended up calling corporate Walmart, they were understanding and able to cancel the order without a penalty fee. The person I spoke with was super helpful and agreed it was just going to waste money, food, and that it was them who made the time change so they will make it work. Great. It goes solved and I resubmitted the order just fine for an afternoon delivery, so I am not banned apparently.

But I’ve been replaying this in my head. Was I the problem on the Instacart call?

I know everybody says they aren’t the problem, which is why I want to know if I have blinders on. Genuinely I was not rude or combative until she called me entitled.

The local Walmart conversation was pleasant, the corporate Walmart conversation was pleasant, but the Instacart one seemed unnecessarily aggressive and dramatic.

Am I the Karen? 😬

I am interested in buying a piece of land and building a custom home on it. For a traditional mortgage, I have an approval for $1.2m with over 20% down.

Looking at a $300,000 piece of land with a construction cost of about $600,000 for what I want.

Is this doable?

On its own, land is really hard to finance. If we pay for the land outright, we’d have nothing left for the build. How do banks look at this? Are custom builds and land purchases, when bundled together, mortgageable?

In Ontario if that matters.

I hate asking this on Reddit, but I'm at a loss. I don't have a family doctor and live near Kingston, but am open to driving as far as Durham. For the last couple of months, I've experienced severe pain and a clinic requisitioned an ultrasound. The ultrasound results were "urgent" and revealed that my IUD is in the wrong place, causing my pain and constant light bleeding, plus severe fibroids. It's terrible. Most of the time, it's like a 4/10, but it spikes to a 9/10 after a long day of work (active job, moving around = sore uterus). I treat it with NSAIDs and a hot water bottle, but that's not enough.

The clinic that sent the requisition then sent a referral to an OBGYN in my area. She was the one who inserted the IUD in 2022, so super convenient. It's been two weeks. I'm in agony. I don't care about the fibroids (at this point) I just want the pain caused by irritation to stop.

I called to follow up and make sure the OBGYN's office received the referral, and asked what wait time I can expect. She said that this is not urgent and so it is likely to take 6-8 months.

I don't know what to do. I can't handle this for six months. It's excruciating.

Are there resources/places that women can go? I don't feel right taking up space in already overwhelmed emergency departments, so looking for an alternative.

I’ve been on Wellbutrin since September or October of last year and honestly, I feel “happily” for the first time in years. Like, I genuinely enjoy life again.

However, since I’ve been in it I’ve lost 15 lbs. I’m a slim person already, 15 lbs for me is a lot. I’m down four pant sizes and none of my clothes fit me. I’ve never had body image issues, but I’m so self conscious right now because I don’t feel “normal.”

Has anyone else who lost weight found a way to stop or gain weight while taking it?

I’ve recently experienced some terrible cramping between periods and my virtual clinician requested an ultrasound. Ultrasound found a fibroid that is likely the main culprit of pain, while the irritation I feel sometimes is likely the IUD.

The ultrasound found that my IUD is low. The result said word for word: “Slightly low positioned IUD within endometrial cavity.”

I don’t have a family doctor, so my follow up with virtual care was with a NP. She said that I would likely need the IUD removed and replaced, which is totally fine.

How urgent is this, though? My IUD is my only birth control method, and the pain sucks.

The NP referred me to a gynaecologist and the wait time is approximately 6 months (we only have one in my area and she is always so busy). Just wondering if anyone else has experienced this and if so, how urgently you had it dealt with?

Googling fibroids and the low IUD scared me. 😅

I've been in and out of counselling for most of my adult life, and am seeking a new approach because I never found it really "clicked" after the first round of developing coping skills. What type of counselling should I look for, or what should I be asking for when initially meeting with a counsellor to see if we're a good fit?

What I'm looking for is less CBT, DBT, etc., and more talking through experiences, decisions, and points of insecurity in my life. I'm super self-aware, recognize my feelings, use my coping skills effectively, and have a decent handle on my reactions. But I just want to talk about things with someone to process and, when it makes sense, challenge my thinking.

I don't want to talk about hot thoughts, make charts about my moods, breathing squares, and acceptance. There is value to all of those things, but I've passed it. I am aware; I handle my feelings, react appropriately, and am able to. I just want to process the situation or feelings with someone who isn't a friend who validates everything I say.

When attending therapy, most ask what goal I'm working toward, and right now it's just understanding myself and feeling more empowered/accepting in that understanding.

Hoping for direction of what to look for/ask for when trying to find a good fit.