u/Silver-Dust7013

im so upset rn bro i really thought i had a chance like i had a SLITHER of hope for a 5. i knew that i'd probably get a 4 especially because of the distribution but i kept gaslighting and manipulating myself its okay have some hope but omg im so disappointed i expected it but it just feels so anticlimactic

especially because this is my second AP, i feel like i'm devolving. i got a 5 on ap human geography last year and now i get a lower score kms kms kms kms kms

im so upset like im DEVOLVING and i studied so much i did as much as i could, i tried so hard but it wasn't enough

i’m 16 and learning how to drive, i got my permit back in september when i was 15 and still don’t have my license because my parents started teaching me during summer so i wouldn’t be too occupied during the school year

anyways, both my parents just make me really nervous ab driving they both confuse me and are panicking too much or literally underestimate me so much. however i’d much rather prefer my mom than my dad, she’s not as harsh. the thing is i HATE learning with my dad and driving with him. he’s so mean, like his tone of voice is just so harsh and when he gives me instructions or stuff i wanna cry cause he’s never smiling or joking around like my instructor. not even just driving, he’s always like this. he literally called me a “crazy stupid idiot” and made me cry bc i went straight on a green light because he didn’t tell me whether he wanted me to go right or any direction he didn’t say anything, when i went straight he got super mad?? like wtf how am i supposed to magically know? i literally hate his teaching style and him in general , not just bc of driving because of how he makes me feel mentally i just hate being around him.

my mom knows ALL of this and she’s witnessed it yet shes still yelling at me because im not going to practice with him. i want her to be there otherwise im not doing it. she kept saying she’s busy and has to do things and i understand that, i told her id wait for her to finish so she can go but she lept yelling at me saying no and that i need to go with my dad and saying that “you’ll never learn how to drive like this” she clearly just wants to force me to go with him when im literally fucking uncomfortable. i’m not going on the road alone with him he’s gonna make me so nervous.

btw i don’t wanna sound entitled so im including this my mom doesn’t have a busy job or anything she’s a housewife so its not like im even taking time away from her work i get she has things to do around the house but i said im perfectly okay waiting for her or helping bc i dont wanna go alone with him

im just really frustrated and upset i hate how dysfunctional my family is i wont include more details ab that bc i dont wanna make a sob story on here but yeah am i wrong for not wanting to go with him

i’m 16 and learning how to drive, i got my permit back in september when i was 15 and still don’t have my license because my parents started teaching me during summer so i wouldn’t be too occupied during the school year 😭

anyways, both my parents just make me really nervous ab driving they both confuse me and are panicking too much or literally underestimate me so much. however i’d much rather prefer my mom than my dad, she’s not as harsh. the thing is i HATE learning with my dad and driving with him. he’s so mean, like his tone of voice is just so harsh and when he gives me instructions or stuff i wanna cry cause he’s never smiling or joking around like my instructor. not even just driving, he’s always like this. he literally called me a “crazy stupid idiot” and made me cry bc i went straight on a green light because he didn’t tell me whether he wanted me to go right or any direction he didn’t say anything, when i went straight he got super mad?? like wtf how am i supposed to magically know? i literally hate his teaching style and him in general , not just bc of driving because of how he makes me feel mentally i just hate being around him.

my mom knows ALL of this and she’s witnessed it yet shes still yelling at me because im not going to practice with him. i want her to be there otherwise im not doing it. she kept saying she’s busy and has to do things and i understand that, i told her id wait for her to finish so she can go but she lept yelling at me saying no and that i need to go with my dad and saying that “you’ll never learn how to drive like this” she clearly just wants to force me to go with him when im literally fucking uncomfortable. i’m not going on the road alone with him he’s gonna make me so nervous.

btw i don’t wanna sound entitled so im including this my mom doesn’t have a busy job or anything she’s a housewife so its not like im even taking time away from her work i get she has things to do around the house but i said im perfectly okay waiting for her or helping bc i dont wanna go alone with him

im just really frustrated and upset i hate how dysfunctional my family is i wont include more details ab that bc i dont wanna make a sob story on here but yeah am i wrong for not wanting to go with him

guys please reassure me bro if you send a friend request by accident, but then immediately block, will the friend request be canceled like will the person be notified/ see it on their screens?

PLEASE PLEASE TELL NE IT CANCELS OUT I LET THE BIGGEST GASP IM SO SCARED RN OMG

If you send a friend request by accident but then block immediately, will the friend rq cancel (like will the person not be able to see it on their screen)

PLEADE LMK PLEASE

im gonna copy and paste my tiktok comment here. some guy made a video talking about how peopl internally hate their religion, talking about how people criticize dawah bros and everything but they don’t take a second to look at the theological teachings of religion and realize the patriarchal aspects and shit

islam is a very flawed religion lol, im saying this as a 16 year old muslim girl. im only muslim became i don’t wanna go to heII. christianity, judaism, and islam are just so insanely patriarchal and misogynistic. oppressive. maturing is realizing these 3 religions ONLY benefit males in the mesopotamia/ middle east area. why do you think all these religions evolve in the middle east/ west asia? it’s evil. let’s speak the truth, jesus and muhammed were most likely 95% schizophrenic. especially the shit with Aisha and mohammed. i am muslim, i will admit my religion is not necessarily good nor is judaism or christianity. listen; really hear me out, doesn’t it just sound fucking INSANE when you think about how mohammed claimed Allah told him to marry 9 year old aisha? think about it. look at what Samuel Bateman has been doing. look into the case of samuel bateman, the false prophet, he claims that God has sent him revelations of marrying teenage girls and being polygamous to get into heaven. he got sent to a MENTAL INSTITUTION for schizophrenia. just think about it. back then, they had no resources or knowledge about mental health. now we do. religion is ultimately a way to control the masses and invoke fear within us, saying this as a muslim girl btw

i don’t even know if i can call myself muslim anymore, do i even believe in God anymore? im not sure. i feel like im agnostic. i feel like the divine is something humans cannot comprehend. and i don’t think God is in the sense of what we humans think God is. i don’t think God necessarily created a heaven or hell. i think this is all bullshit made up by humans, i think there is no true way to know the afterlife or WHAT GOD IS or IF GOD REALLY IS TRUE. And i will NEVER refer to God as “He”

the abundance of the masculine pronoun “He” when speaking ab God really proves the patriarchal aspects of Abrahamic religion. why can’t i call God “she”

a woman is the closest thing to divinity on this planet: our wombs are portals of life.

this is just the tip of the iceberg lol i have many more reasons for being confused ab the existence of God like the flawed free will argument, cycle of evil, the world practically being God’s oyster of entertainment and sending us to hell/heaven for the things She has planned herself: i’d go much more in depth but i don’t think people will actually read that, if you’d like to discuss with me then dm im open to it.

honestly, i feel like humans have always strived for ‘why’, ‘what’ and who. Why are we here? What is our purpose? Why is the universe like it is? WHY are we human? Who created the universe? it’s just natural for humans to be curious about these things. and i think people utilized religion to cope. they wrote books like the torah, quran, bible to have sense of belonging, sense of acknowledgment, sense of closure knowing theres some all divine figure waiting for them in heaven.

i truly just think this shit is coping. i want to be honest ive posted a few times here. i feel so guilty for what im about to say, but i truly dont think im gonna land in hell. i just don’t think there is a hell or heaven. but at the same time i am utterly scared of hell. im scared of jahannam. im scared of it all. and i dont know what my life will be like if im not muslim. i wouldnt be able to tell my family. im ngl my dad would kill me or disown me, we live in the US btw probably kill is an exaggeration but i dont think id feel safe with him. my mom is already starting to find out i dont know she keeps asking me “do you believe in Allah and mohammed as his last messenger” i didnt answer bc idk something in my heart is refusing to let me say yes i asked her why she’s asking me this she says “bc i love you so much”

ik my mom loves me i know this is her way of coping with life i know she really believes in islam but idk if i can do it any longer. i feel like she’d hate me and be disappointed in me. one day i just implied out that i hate sunni islam and kinda like idk i kinda was so frustrated and trying to get her to understand my

perspective and she keeps saying im misunderstanding and to listen to scholars & not her i told her scholars are bullshit misogynists and that if anything i’d lean to sufi islam and she was like “ok go ahead and do that” she sounded supportive about it but bro

i just don’t wanna follow ANY type or abrahamix relicion. i want to live mt life. i don’t want to wear hijab. i don’t want to chant in arabic 5 times a day, begging God to do something yet She does nothing for me. i don’t want to look at palestine, sudwn, congo and think to myself “May Allah hlep them” ALLAH IS CAUSING IT. HOW CAN ALLAH HELP THEM WHEN ALLAH IS A BYSTANDER?

i don’t want to be christian. i don’t want to be jewish. i don’t want to follow any radical religion. i want to be spiritual. idk where to start im only 16 man this shit takes over my life

i can’t do anything i want because of islam. i can’t participate in extracurriculars. i can’t dance. i can’t wear what i want. i can’t wear makeup bc it’s deemed as shameful. i can’t do anything without losing my identity as my moms “simple beautiful shy girl”

ok this just turned into a whole rant sorry i don’t think anyone’s gonna read this im just gonna stop lmao dm me if you wanna discuss more about confusion or what not

i (16f) really don’t know what to do at this point, it’s extremely concerning. she’s been on discord since the age of like 5-6, and she has a habit of lying about her age to people online. ive caught her various times, in 2024 she kept telling ppl she was 14, 16, or 17 when in reality she was literally 10-11. it’s terrible.

like in her head she probably thinks that this is okay & normal, she sees me as annoying for getting onto her ab it, but i genuinely don’t know how to convince her this is wrong & unhealthy.

she doesn’t listen, she is so stubborn. like she’s 12 now she’s about to turn 13 in July, she’s been on the r/teenagers subreddit for 4 years. since she was 8.

she is obsessed with discord she has been using it for years and she meets many horrible people on there. i literally feel so defeated bc ive tried my hardest to get her off discord, i was 10 in 2020 my sister was like 6 and i was BEGGING my parents to give her restrictions on the internet, monitor her, take away discord, etc but they just brushed it off. they genuinely did nothing abt it and their excuse is “oh i dont know much about the internet i dont know how to control it or restrict it”

my little sister literally never talks to me anymore. NEVER. like she genuinely hates me and i don’t understand why?? i genuinely care for her and love her but she doesn’t talk to me it’s been like this since 2025. she only has spoken to me on family trips and even then she argues with me. i feel like growing up on discord & social media has harmed her development so much and given her trauma. she’s been posting on reddit a lot, things like “how do you deal with negative thoughts”

i feel like my sister genuinely hates me and doesn’t care about me lol but i really do love her and wanna protect her. she doesn’t see it. and she’s been incredibly careless + disrespectful towards my mom, my dad took her phone away and my sister just keeps taking my moms phone, installing discord, tiktok, reddit, etc. she’s literally broken the phone twice because she takes it in the shower w her to listen to music. i get listening to music in the shower can be relaxing but this is ANOTHER LEVEL of addiction, she submerged the phone in water w her because she can’t be away from it.

in 2024, i also found messages of her with this guy and they were pretty close she was 10 & he was 14 she would SKIP SCHOOL and stay up late just to talk to him. it’s just fucking heartbreaking and concerning lie wtf do. ido? i tried to speak to the guy abt it he said he’ll stop bc i told him the real age, i told my parents but ultimately they did nothing about it.

i don’t think she should have a phone, it’s not safe for her. my dad took her phone away because she missed 95% of 7th grade she failed the entire year, and my mom is pissed off because she thinks my sister should have the phone back since my sister keeps taking my moms phone

idk bro all i wanna do is protect her from discord and the traumatic nature of social media but she hates me, she doesn’t wanna understand, she doesn’t wanna listen, my parents don’t wanna listen, idk.

i have tried my HARDEST to tell my parents but they never listen. my sister dgaf about me but i always am concerned for her and idk how to connect with her she’s always mad at me or doesn’t wanna speak with me

UPDATE: i feel so helpless right now. as we’re speaking, as im typing this comment, my mom is talking about “Allah saving her” and “get closer to namaz and deen” “look how scattered justin bieber is he’s about to convert to islam” HOLY fucking shit. holy shit. she doesn’t care. she’s saying “what is monitoring her gonna do? i already told her not to talk to these people, namaz is the solution, islam is the solution” she is brainwashed. i’m telling you this woman is brainwashed and i can’t even get through to her. right now as im typing she’s lecturing me about namaz and getting closer o Allah. she’s saying the reason my sister is lying about her age and doing this stuff is “she’s not close to Islam, this is her fault, she’ll become a source for goodness and prosperity if she prays” what the fuck do i do. i’ve told her eveeubring i found she doesn’t care.

additionally earlier she kept saying how she’s gonna leave me & my sister cause we’re now grown 12 & 16 and that she’s gonna start living for her mom and taking care of her and getting a job in nyc lmao she genuinely dgaf. my father dgaf either i told him multiple times he said he’ll do something but he ends up doing nothing

this feels so embarrassing to make & post because i didn’t think id be in this situation 💔 i just feel so upset and disappointed with myself. i know im better than this and i know i can do better but i just don’t know why this happened and why i bombed the final.

i’m scared people are gonna make fun of me or something and say “oh how’d u get a d in honors chem that’s easy” i promise you it isn’t. at our school we have no retakes for tests allowed in chem and everything goes so fast.

i originally had a 73% which is still shitty but better than a D, on the final i literally bombed it, got a 45.3% and it dropped down to a 67%. i just wanna cry like i’ve been so sad since i got home from the last day. this is genuinely gonna ruin my applications i already don’t have a good gpa. i already got 4 C’s freshman year, improved a lot second semester, did really well first sem of sophomore year with mostly A’s, now second semester im gonna be ending with B’s, A’s 1 C and a fucking D. i could’ve fixed all of those B’s and that C in my honors english class but my teacher wouldn’t let me because “unexcused absence” i tried so hard bro i reached out to my dean to have it be excused but nothing wrong. i advocated for myself, i genuinely tried but they wouldn’t budge.

i’ve had an attendance issue these past 2 years because of my mental health, i don’t know what’s going on and why i feel like this but my parents don’t believe me nor do they believe in mental health, they’re very religious. i don’t have a stable support system at home and my family’s dysfunctional. also, my counselor practically hates me. i’ll never open up to him about mental health again because he quite literally told my algebra 2 teacher to FAIL me and that i don’t deserve to pass smh. anyways i just feel so lost and stupid. i feel disappointed and grief. i know it’s just a D but it really isn’t in the grand scheme of things colleges will see I had a rocky start but then get a D in the middle of highschool. a D doesn’t show improvement at all. and it’s a D in a core class, honors chemistry.

i just don’t know what to do it’s gonna wreck my GPA, the last day of school was may 28th. should i try to email my teacher and ask for a unit test retake on one of the teacher working days?? im taking IVSA summer courses for sociology and french to ease the pain of the D as well so my gpa will improve at least a bit. idk i feel like a failure i know my dream universities are gonna instantly reject me now. like all i wanna do is cry it’s just so fucking unfair i tried so hard. during the chem final and during all final days, i got my period and was facing the first 1-3 days in it and my cramps were HORRIBLE. they hurt so bad the first few days. i know it’s not an excuse but it contributes to my poor performance.

i just don’t know what to do

hi so title, i was wondering if it would harm the college admissions process if they saw i didn't neccessarily take a science class junior year?

would it make them look at my application any differently/ the rigor of my courses? some context is that i wanna major in psychology and take the pre med route. also, i took honors bio freshman year and honors chem this year. i was planning on doing ap bio this yr, but i kinda got scared and chose dual credit anatomy.

idk if i should replace dc a&p with ap bio or if i should go with what i rly want: ap art history OR if i should be practical and stick with dc a&p. both are so so interesting but idk i love AP art history it sounds like such a fun class. i like anatomy too its just i feel its gonna be really tedious & i'll probably forget most of it anyway, im pretty sure they teach u anatomy in med school, so idrk if itll give me college credit. alongside this id be taking apush, ap lang, ap psych, spanish 4 honors, pre calc, R.A.D 1st semester nd sports medicine 2nd semester.

lmk thank u!

ngl theres no fucking way this shit is real. sometimes i want to tell my family to fuck off and that i fucking despise their extreme beliefs and culture. can i even call myself muslim atp? i dont even fucking know im fed up with this religion like over the past few days i feel like ive just had stockholm syndrome my whole life and thats why i still call myself muslim.

im literally hot asf in this house its hot as a roach, keep in mind i live in the US in the midwest so it gets pretty hot here during summer, and im wearing pajama pants theyre kinda thick and then i complain to my mom that im hot and THEN SHE YELLS AT ME SAYING "ok then why ru wearing those pants wear smth lighter" i tell her "because u literally scream at me for wearing shorts when dads in the house" and then shes like "yeah because thats the islamic dresscode you have to cover urself its modesty around ur father i didnt say it Allah did" what the fuck?? so youre telling me Allah is sexualizing daughters in front of their fathers and that this is what islam is supposed to be? even our body is an object of excitement to ANY man including our father? wtf is this bullshit. im fucking furious i hate this stupid ass afamily ih ate this religion i hate how im gonna burn in hell cause i dont believe in it i hate it all. i literally am crying rn bc i didnt do anything to beb orn into this. other ppl are so lucky. theyre born into athiest/agnostii cc respectful loving families and im stuck with this bullshit.

i cant even wear shorts when its hot IN MY OWN HOUSE. IN THE COMFORT OF MY OWN HOME. And then my stupid ass fucking misogynsitic ass self-hating mom wants to yell at me for wearing shots around my dad and keeps saying "its what the Quran says ill give oyu an english transated one" I DONT FUCKING WANT THAT. IF SOMETHING IS SO HATEFUL AND DISGUSTING I DONT WANNA READ IT.

cherry on top is that my dad told her to burn my legs "at this point all you can do is burn hr legs" ok i hope u fucking burn in hell you fucking pathetic ass old man fuck u bro i cant wait till u die.

idgaf if im going out of line right now I REALLY DONT GIVE A FUCK WHAT ANYONE THINKS AB ME. i screamed at my mom to shut up and that shes so stupid and her whole bullshit beliefs are fucking oppressive. i hate her. i hate my dad. i hate my family oh my F UCKIGN GOSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH BRO WHY THE FUCK WAS I BORN AS A GIRL WHY WAS I BORN AS A MUSLIM WHY DOES SOCIETY TREAT WOMEN LIKE THIS WHAT THE FUCK DID E DO TO DESERVE THIS.

(f16) im a 16 yo girl born and raised in a south asian muslim (specifically pakistani/indian) household and i dont even know where to start. i just feel like such a disappointment. i dont want to go to hell. im terrified of hell. but it is just so hard for me to continue believing. i don’t even wanna live i literally wanna kms, i hate my life so much. my entire family is so religious, my parents always talk about islam, hijab and what not. and i just feel horrified reading some disgusting hadiths and misogynistic verses in them. i frequently bring my concerns up to my mother and we always end up in an argument with me crying bc she never takes my side or understands me, she always finds a way to justify shit. how the fuck are we supposed to believe in Sahih Bukhari Hadith when most of it is literally DISGUSTING??? i just don’t get it. how could this possibly be the message of the men of God in prophets time?

i feel like im gaslighting myself. genuinely. i feel like a jester, i feel like a clown trying to justify and find SOME defense to all this misogyny. at first it was with hijab and modesty i tried so hard to defend this but i just can’t anymore. it’s not right. it’s literally double standards THIS WHOLE RELIGION BENEFITS MEN. EVERYTHING IS CENTERED UPON MALE GAZE, EVERYTHING. i can’t take it. i just fucking can’t my mind is corrupted by the bounds i’ve lived my life i know im not articulating well im sorry but i just want to live. i want to live life. i want to live without worrying if im wearing something to tempt man. i want to wear what i want. i want to do pretty nails. i want pusheen designed nails. i wanna wear off the shoulder shirts when it’s hot and feel the breeze on my shoulders. is that too much to fucking ask for? i can’t even wear shit around my FATHER. i can’t even wear an off the shoulder top around him in the comfort of my own home without getting screamed at. i cried so much to realize my own father is so incredibly brainwashed that he sees his daughter as smth to objectify. he also has slapped me hard this was in nov of 2024 and he justified it by saying “okay if you don’t believe me i’ll take you to a scholar to discuss how discipline is ALLLWED” FUCK YOU. FUCK YOU. Fuck you.

MEN CAN HAVE EVERUTHING THEY WANT RIGHT? WORK WITHOIT ANY EXTERNAL PRESSURE, NO EXPECTATIONS OF FULLY COVERED UP AND NO INTERACTION WITH OPPOSITE GENDER, THEY CAN WEAR SHORTS ON THE BEACH THEY CAN EVEN GO FUCKING SHIRTLESS THEU CAN DO WHATT HEY WANT THEY ARE SEEN AS EQUALS BUT WE WOMEN ARE SEEN AS SECON RCLASS CIRZIENZ. IM SORRY BUT HOW THE FUCK WM I SUPPOSED TO LIVR LIFE LIKE THIS BEING A SUBSERVIENT PERSON SEEN AS LESS??? MEN CAN LITERALLY MARRY WOMEN OF DIFFERENT RELIGIONS, BUT IF A WOMAN DARES TO SAY ANYTHINT ABOUT A MUSLIM MAN SHES DEEMED AS “No haya” “FATHERLESS” “KAFFIR” Or if we show a fucking ANKLE or SHOULDER we get told we’re tempting men and we “want attention”

it’s not even just this it’s not even just this i am struggling so much with the concept of Allah. there is so many horrific things in this world. genocide, FGM, slavery, human traffickjng( epstein island, horrors beyond our imagination. i can’t even form my thoughts properly i wanna cry im so scared writing this fuck im really sorry but i just don’t understand how does Allah allow this. how does Allah watch these things happen and then declare in the Quran “I am the best of planners” how. and the free will argument makes no sense to me, how the fuck is any of this free will when everything has been pre determined by Allah? i just can’t fathom the concept of God watching children be tortured and raped but it’s all in the name of “life being a test” and “free will”

there is so much more but i just can’t im just so scared to say this i feel like im gonna go to hell. i feel so disconnected from religion. my mental health is horrible. it’s terrible. i think im genuinely depressed. i don’t have the urge to live. i feel like im cosplsting im just a fucki g disappointing to my family im just a mistake bro

well what the fuck did they edpect. they raised me in the smallest town FULL of racist white MAGA christians for 12 years and now they expect me to be the most religious and pious person? fuck this bullshit. im sorry but its EXHAUSTING living in this kind of family. im so tired i want everything to end im such a bad daughter, im a bax muslim.

this isn’t even the tip of the iceberg im censoring myself so much to what i actually wanna say. im so scared to even post this. i feel it’s a very bad idea what if someone sends it to my parents or finds me and harasses me and calls me a kaffir and tells me im going to hell? im sorry this is really incoherent i just genuinely am sobbing rn like im having an existential crisis i genuinely don’t know what im gonna do with my mind or my faith i don’t know i tried praying so many times i tried asking Allah for help or guidance Allah has never accepted my prayers or sent me signs

guys if anyone did this LEQ please lmk what you said and dm me because i really wanna make sure my answers were on par/ somewhat accurate to the general trend of what everyone said. feel free to msg me so we can talk abt it also i had only 25 mins left for the leq so im scared shitless

guys please let me know if you did LEQ 2 (1200-1600 state building and military conflict) dm me please so we can debrief bc im genuinely scared over this and wanna know if my responses were on par/ accurate