u/Spiritual_Avocado87

The nearest LYS to where I live is 2+ hours by public transport. I can order online and there are some shops in my city but they only sell acryllic yarn like Stylecraft and some King Cole. You can imagine my excitement when a local yarn dyer announced she was opening a new yarn shop nearby. She's been talking it up loads, especially all the nice yarn brands she's going to stock (West Yorkshire Spinners, Sandnes Garn, Rosa Pomar, etc). She's been running a yarn business for years and I let myself get really excited about it.

Today she posted saying she can't actually stock any nice yarn unless customers pay for it upfront. She explained it's because nice brands often need a big order upfront and she doesn't want to risk getting a bank loan.

I want to believe this is legit but I feel really disappointed. Why wouldn't she research this stuff upfront, before deciding to launch the business? Why is it not ok for her to take on financial risk, but to ask everyone else to? Why not launch an online business first and check you've got demand, before investing all your money in a physical venue?

I don't know if I'm being too harsh or have spent too long reading horror stories about bad business practise on subreddits like this. Or if this person I thought was legit is behaving irresponsibly and I should steer clear.

My local party is voting on whether to support Zionism is Racism next week. I already felt uneasy about it (because it seems badly written and very vague about things that need specificity) but now I'm worried about the vote.

What would it mean if my local party (Sheffield) suports it? One of our councillors has been very vocal about it and I think his influence is going to see it passed. Will this make the party look reactionary and/or antisemitic? Should I vote against it or does it not really matter if we support it or not?

Edit: changed "adopt" to "support" to better reflect the planned vote.

Here's the actual wording:  Sheffield Green Party endorses the Zionism is Racism motion and urges members to support and vote it at the conference on the 2nd-4th of October.

I'm currently ripping out the 5th version of a sleeve where (once again) the short rows are either gapping or fused to my needles. I've been using a Purl Soho tutorial and I think the issue I'm having is that the instructor does a picking type of knitting. I do English/throwing style and I can't seem to follow the logic of how she's mounting her stitches. Especially when coming back around at the end of the short rows, to pick up the last stitch.

I've only been able to find one video for throwing style and it's out-of-focus. Can anyone please recommend me some short row how-to guides for knitters who throw their yarn?

Edited to clarify that I'm using Wrap and Turn short rows (very open to alternatives) and I don't need a video, it's just the only thing I could find. Photos or illustrations are also great!

A few weeks ago I was searching for practical things to help make my TFMR easier. Now I'm a week out from the procedure and here to share my own tips.

Context

I'm 38 years old, this was my 6th pregnancy (5 previous miscarriages). My pregnancy was 18 weeks when I had the termination. I'm on blood thinners so was treated as a high-risk pregnancy.

Before the procedure

1. I opted for surgery because I didn't want to risk going through labour, only to retain the placenta and have to have surgery anyway.

2. I organised mental health support in advance. One session a week via phone. I think I would have struggled to organise that post-surgery and it made me feel proactive in the build-up.

3. I did as much organising as I could re. the house. All the laundry, a big food shop, bed linen changed, house cleaned (I hired a cleaner as I wasn't able to do much cleaning myself).

4. I asked for support from friends and family. I asked my parents to stay after the surgery (because I knew I'd need company and distraction) and I asked my friends who love to cook if they could do some batch cooking for us.

5. I got as much rest as I could, while also cutting myself some slack. I didn't eat particularly healthily and I spent more time on my phone than I normally like to but it was what I needed to get through the days.

During the procedure

1. I requested all painkiller options for when the rods were inserted. I had to ask twice but I got the good stuff (some kind of inhaler that was a bit like gas-and-air but stronger).

2. I wore my most comfortable clothes to the clinic and brought a blanket from home.

3. Something I wish I hadn't done: I was sick not long after getting some anti-nausea meds and immediately threw it away (I did it into a takeaway coffee cup). Because I threw it away, they couldn't check to see if I'd thrown up the meds and they couldn't risk giving me any more.

After the procedure

1. I used nipple cream from the first day. My nipples were already cracked and leaking colostrum and I didn't want them to get more painful.

2. I wore a tight sports bra. Not tight enough to hurt, but definitely tighter than normal. I slept in that bra as well, for the added support in the night.

3. As soon as my breasts started hurting I iced them with ice pops. I had a pack of about 30 and I would snap them in two and put one half in each bra cup until they melted (still in their plastic packet, I wasn't letting iced syrup just melt on my chest).

4. After icing I put a leaf of cabbage in each bra cup (I used the pale green cabbage). I left those leaves in for around 4 hours and then kept changing them. It gave me almost immediate relief and I iced before each change. I credit this with the fact my milk never came in.

5. I avoided some of the standard advice like dehydration and avoiding hot water on my breasts. We're having a heatwave in Europe and I thought being dehydrated and not showering properly would make me feel worse.

6. I also cleaned the colostrum off every evening with some warm water on a cotton wool pad.

7. I wore period pants for the first few days. I don't normally like using them because it's a lot of plastic but I made an exception this time and I'm glad I did. They feel less intrusive than a pad and I was more comfortable in the heat.

8. I tried to appreciate small things like being able to drink coffee again (I lost the taste for it during pregnancy) and the fact that I didn't need to constantly nap. It wasn't like "I'm glad I'm not pregnant anymore", more just "it's nice to fit in my clothes again, it's nice to have my morning ritual back".

9. I reframed things like the milk as annoyances, rather than dwelling on what it meant. I was still quite tearful but thinking about the colostrum as discharge made it easier for me to deal with than thinking about the fact it was supposed to feed my baby.

10. I let myself cry and feel my feelings, but I haven't pressured myself to answer big questions like if we'll try again and what it means if we don't. I'm not in the right headspace to handle those questions right now, future me will have more energy and so she will have to deal with them.

11. I have let other people break the news. I told my friends, but my parents are spreading the word with my family and letting them know I need a bit of space before they console me. Likewise my partner is telling his friends and family.

12. I planned one nice thing outside the house every day. E.g. walking my dog in the park. Going book shopping. Having a coffee and cake at a cafe.

13. I started planning a holiday for a few months time.

14. I started a new creative hobby and read mainly gay romance books (formulaic, so I don't have to think and less likely to feature kids/pregnancy as a happy ending).

That's all the practical stuff I can remember for now. I'll update the post if I remember anything else. Hope this helps someone.

Councillor for Southey just announced he's stepping down on Facebook, due to family commitments.

Looking at the numbers from the local election I imagine we're looking at another Reform councillor but maybe the Burnham bounce will see Labour stepping up?

Results for Southey - May 2026

Reform 49.9%

Labour 24.5%

Green 12.9%

Con 4.8%

Lib Dem 4.7%

Ind 2.6%

TUSC 0.6%

*Edited because at first I thought it was a Reform councillor stepping down but he's actually Independent.

My partner and I have decided to TFMR. My mum has always raised me with a feminist mindset, but I didn't realise that doesn't extend to abortion. She was horrified that we're planning to get the amnio in the first place and said multiple times that she would never do that. I told her that our decision was made and if she couldn't handle it then we wouldn't talk about it. She backed off and has been sending supportive messages since then.

Today we got the amnio result. We always knew we'd TFMR if the rest was positive and I'd already told her what that decision would be. When I told her the result was positive and she said "we'll support you no matter what you decide." Thing is, the decision was already made before the test and she knew that, so it felt like she was waiting for me to change my mind. She's still saying supportive things but her messages are much shorter than usual, without the usual warmth.

She's now offered to come stay for the procedure and my partner wants to take her up on that. It would make our lives a bit easier (we have no family living near us), but I'm not sure if I can handle the atmosphere. I know she won't directly confront me, but she's always been very good at not saying things loudly. I don't know if I'm being overly sensitive and about to shoot myself in the foot because her support isn't "perfect", or if it's a genuinely bad idea to have someone in the house during this time that doesn't agree with my decision.

Have any of you had this kind of silent disagreement from a loved one and do you have any recommendations for how to cope with it?

I was looking for UK experiences last night and couldn't find many, so I thought I'd share mine. Hopefully it's helpful for someone else.

About me: I'm 38 years old, based in Sheffield and this is my 6th pregnancy. It's the first one to get this far (I was diagnosed with thrombophilia after the 5th miscarriage), I'm 15 weeks and we had a high NIPT result for Down Syndrome. I don't have any of the numbers other people quote in here but my understanding is that we're 95-99% likely to have a positive test result.

I've found the best way to survive these things is just to get my head down and push through. So please keep that in mind before leaving well wishes or offering to pray for me.

The build-up

We arrived early and were sent to the waiting room for scans. There were lots of pregnancy posters and diagrams of fetuses on the walls, as well as heavily pregnant people walking past. So if you're like me and trying to avoid that stuff I recommend staying glued to your phone.

I was called and we went into a private room with the Lead Midwife. She started out by expressing sympathy for me and I explained that it's easiest for me to approach these things in a practical manner, rather than dwelling on how sad it is. She was very receptive to that and held off on any further condolences. She then took me through every step of the test, what I might feel during it and what would happen after. My partner and I asked some questions and she made us feel like there was no rush to start the test, which was appreciated.

I said I didn't want to see the baby on the scan screen and she reassured me that they would turn the screens away from us. She asked if I wanted to hear the heart beat and I said that I didn't. She was very understanding and didn't make me feel judged for that decision. She checked that my partner would be comfortable with needles and recommended how he could angle his chair away if he felt queasy watching.

I then explained that I wanted local anesthetic because I've been having a lot of blood thinner injections in my stomach and the sensation makes me start retching. I said I didn't want to disrupt the test by retching while it was happening and she immediately said she'd speak to the consultant about anesthetic for me. I'd been prepared for an argument but she was very understanding and accommodating.

She left to speak to the consultant and we sat there for a few minutes before she came to collect us.

The test

We went into a nearby examination room and I was greeted by the consultant. He checked about the local anesthetic and I confirmed I wanted it. He then gave me a disclosure form to sign. It included tick boxes for the risks and I was able to ask him to clarify what some of them meant.

Then I lay on the table and he helped me get comfortable and put some jelly on my stomach for the quick scan of the baby. This is a bit vague because I asked not to hear details but I assume everything looked fine because he said he was going to clean my stomach for the test. At this point the first midwife was called away and she was replaced by two other midwives. They introduced themselves, apologized for having to swap and I explained again that I didn't want to have any sympathy because it would just upset me. They said they understood and started getting ready for the test.

My partner sat by the bed the whole time (the table was quite low) and held my hand. We talked about our plans for a holiday while the consultant and midwife cleaned my stomach again. The consultant asked if I wanted to know what they were doing step-by-step and I said no. He did the local anesthetic (less painful than a vaccine shot) and then after a few minutes they began the test.

I didn't look at any of it and instead spoke to my partner and one of the midwives about our dog and holiday plans. There was a moment when I felt a pushing and the pulling sensation in my stomach but that was the only thing I felt. No pain. It felt like it only lasted 2-3 minutes and was over very quickly.

After the test they cleaned my stomach again and stuck a bandage on. The bandage is 3cm by 3cm. I took a minute to check I was feeling ok and then sat up. I felt fine but they reassured me I could take my time getting ready.

After the test

We went back to the first private room and the first midwife joined us. She apologised for being called away, checked how I was and asked if I wanted a cup of tea. When I felt ready, she took some blood from me that will be used in the test. She then took us through what side effects I could expect and made sure we had all the emergency and advice numbers to call. She told us when we can expect a call with the results and asked if we'd be comfortable "discussing options" when she called. I confirmed we were fine to do that. She answered a few more questions and then said she'd talk to us later in the week, when they have the results.

We waited for a few more minutes in the private room, to check I felt ok, and then left the ward. We didn't need to check out with the desk or anything.

The aftermath

It's now been 12 hours and I haven't had any cramping. I had a 3 hour nap when we got home and still feel like I've been runover by a bus but no pain. The bandage has a couple of spots of blood on it but they're tiny and none of the symptoms we were warned about have happened. If they do happen I'll update the post. The only others things have been an occasional pinching feeling to the left of my belly button (nowhere near the site of the injection) and I threw up once after the nap, but I think that's because I hadn't eaten much.

Conclusion

Emotionally this has been a completely horrific experience but on a physical level it's been fine. I was really impressed by the staff, how detailed they were and how respectful of what I needed.

I was convinced I'd have cramps (I have endometriosis and usually get cramps pretty easily) but there's been nothing. I've genuinely got worse cramps from putting in a progesterone pessary than I did after this test. I'm knackered but still standing and that feels like an accomplishment.

I hope this is helpful to anyone looking for more info about how the test works on the NHS. I'll answer some questions but I have also tried to be thorough here and include a lot of detail.

Last year I made the full Very Hungry Caterpillar toy for my nephew and it was such a fun, rewarding project. I loved using up all my scrap cotton and the way I could pick up little bits and pieces to work on throughout the year.

I would love to start another big pattern for him but I can't find anything similar. Ideally it would be composed of lots of small parts, fairly ambitious and I'd love if it had a literary theme but it's not necessary.

Can any of you recommend me something similar?

Does anyone know why Alice Coldbreath's books have disappeared from Kobo again? The audiobooks are still there, but all the ebooks are gone. Really hoping she's not gone back to only-Amazon but I can't find any info on her website.

I'm seeing lots of conflicting opinions on whether Greens should run against Burnham in Makerfield, if we should stand aside and whether he'd be good or bad news for Greens in general.

It would be great to hear from some local Greens:

1. How are you feeling about running against him? Does it feel like the right decision?

2. Do you have insights the rest of don't have about how a green candidate might perform?

3. Did you expect him to stand in this seat, or was there another seat you thought he'd be better suited to?

And anything else you'd like to share! I've been trying to imagine how I'd feel if this situation was going down in my city and I honestly don't know what I'd want the local party to do.

Disclaimer: I'm not a journalist, but we know journalists across the political spectrum monitor this sub so I guess obviously don't share anything you don't want getting quoted?