u/Sweet_MolassesTM

If one more fucking person says "ignore it/accept it and keep living" i am going to lose my mind. We seriously need a flair that is for people who have had DPDR for decades with little to no improvements despite multiple efforts. The dismissive attitude on how genuinely debilitating it can be is so ridiculous here. I dont even like catastrophizing or wallowing in it but it makes life unbearable. I don't want to live disconnected and floating. I do it every single time and there is nothing. It genuinely gets to a point when you are actively trying to survive while doing the absolute bare minimum and basics. I can try to ignore it all i want, but when it overtakes my basic senses like sight and hearing... it gets real fucking hard. Whats even worse is how pointless this sub can feel when literally no one has answers for anyone. Why would they? All we do with each other is quietly relate to the 50% of posts here that get absolutely no attention. Im sick of this and im sick of living like this and im sick of people barely understanding and having any solutions, myself included.

Let me just start off and say penetration itself doesn't hurt. I can easily slip a finger inside with no pain whatsoever. Can feel weird, but no pain. However, when there is even the slightest stretch in the opening of my vagina it hurts like hell. Its a stinging sensation, and one that i can't ignore. Now, I'm not sexually active (nor have I been and dont have any plans any time soon) but I dipped my toes in self exploration- or I at least tried to. Everyone keeps telling me that lots of lube and foreplay is needed but what foreplay on my own? I dont respond to my own touch. And lube is not enough but even in a state with no arousal, the stretch should not be this painful. And it's literally just there... right where that flesh ring is in the opening. I have genuine fear for when the time for me to get a pap smear comes- you aren't borny then thats for sure. And I even asked my gyno about it and as nice as she was all she said was "foreplay and lube" is this typical vaginismus? What can I do? Dilators? Do I ask my doctor to see if I have a tight pelvic floor? Its annoying that this even has to be done. I will say i have successfully gotten two fingers in, still stingy uncomfortable but not terribly painful. But a 4.5 inch long 1 inch diameter toy to start out? Unbearable sting. I want it to be comfortable for me whether im by myself or with a potential partner... and i do know this is completely optional if my vagina is being used at a minimum but what about when I do get down? Or maybe i just want to put something in there i dont know. Any advice would be nice. Also it makes my anus area feel weird and sorta hurt too- not sure if that's related.

I've had DPDR for well over 10 years now. I would say within the last 3 years or so is when I truly went down the road to try and better understand myself and this condition. So I've been through all the road bumps I possibly could. I'd say im mostly in a disassociated state with moments of normalcy, but its bearable overall. But then there's moments like now... where everything is absolutely unbearable. For me, the visual overstimulation is absolutely insane. It feels as if I want to rip my eyes out from how bad and disconnected I am. And whats worse is there is a horrific need to escape- which is quite literally impossible. I cant get away from my brain. I hate it because i was doing so well... i felt normal. But I know its temporary... but something like this is NOT optimal for working or being productive. I absolutely hate how this thing is not understood like other mental disorders. Its so difficult finding a therapist or psychologist who actually understands the full aspect of DPDR and not strictly the range of trauma (which is very relevant but holy shit does that NOT help right now)

There has to be a better way to cope with this is in particular. My best bet as of late is trying to lock in and wear sunglasses everywhere I am.

It immediately rejected. Damn. Only 10 days in...

Hey, all. Apologies for no photo, I'm not terribly comfortable with posting a picture of my genitals for all to see just yet lol but maybe later. I just wanted to talk about my experience and just announce i have it i guess but trust me when I say it goes nicely with my VCH and triangle.

I finally went through with it after lots of research on already limited information. It would have been nice to talk to others who have it personally but oh well, too late. It honestly wasn't as bad as I was expecting it to be for someone who doesn't have any sex/penetration nor had a single experience with anything going in my urethra. I was mainly nervous about how my body would respond to it all... and it was without a doubt still intense. I couldn't even tell you whether or not the actual piercing hurt or not because I was feeling all kinds of sensations I was not particularly fond of. Very invasive... but my piercer was wonderful. I was the 2nd person they ever performed a PA on and I appreciate all the effort they went through to learn more and prepare before they worked on me. That was definitely the largest crowd I ever had while getting a piercing lol (4 ppl in the room, not including me). I was surprised to see how lackluster the sensation of something being inserted into my urethra was. My vagina being stretched was worse than anything. Im just glad its over now though... i appreciated all the praise I got after it though lol. If anyone has any questions please ask me... and if any fellow PA havers have any insight or advice for healing, please hit me up

I was wondering if anyone knew any shops/tattoo artists in buffalo that are good a drawing animals- particularly scaled creatures as many artists genuinely can't get the scales right. If thats too specific, any recommendations in general where the specialization is more on the realistic side?

There is definitely some connection to visual input and derealization. For me personally, its as if most environments (especially clutter/neat organization) are overwhelming and overstimulating to my brain i guess. So it feels like I need to escape though I'll say it happens literally anywhere at any time. But I've come to realize that wearing glasses helps??? Or having something to partially obscure my view. Tinted shades especially help- and when those become overwhelming, alternating by looking past them with my normal site helps too. The things I have to do to simply be normal is ridiculous. Is this typical though? Im not even sure what something like this would be called. Does anyone else do similar to help with DR?

I've had DPDR for over a decade now and quite literally nothing is new to me. I have used recreational substances before... I smoked hookah, gotten drunk, and even taken edibles before. Not much has happened regarding my DPDR besides temporarily exacerbating it (which i acknowledge the risks). My mom has these two edibles of unknown mg and wants me to take one but my anxiety is acting up and making me fear for the worst and that my "progress" will be absolutely ruined if I do decide to take it. I know marijuana typically makes DPDR worse and can even make folks experience it but I'm torn because I technically have taken edibles of unknown sources before. Should I say fuck it and take the risk? I do want to try it