u/TheDaddiezCoach

What’s up, fellas. My name is Spence Harris. I’m The Daddiez Coach, and I created Fatherhood, Rebuilt because I believe a lot of us are trying to become better fathers while quietly carrying things nobody ever taught us how to deal with.

Father wounds. Anger. Work pressure. Being physically present but emotionally somewhere else. Trying to provide without realizing what our kids may actually be asking from us. Trying to break cycles while we’re still figuring out how those cycles affected us.

And I’m not talking about any of this from a pedestal.

A lot of what I teach came from getting it wrong first.

I’ve only been building this channel for about a month, but this video is probably the clearest picture I’ve made yet of why I’m doing any of this.

There’s a lot of my personal story in here. I talk about my own fatherhood, some of the things I had to confront in myself, and why I believe becoming a better father often starts with becoming a healthier man.

So if you’ve seen me around this community but don’t really know who I am yet — this is the video I’d want you to watch first.

And I genuinely want your opinion.

Not just “great video.”

If something hits you, tell me what hit you.

If something makes you think about your own fatherhood differently, tell me.

And if you disagree with something I say, that conversation is welcome too.

Because I don’t want this to just be another YouTube channel where one dude talks and everybody else listens.

I want to build a real community of fathers helping each other figure this thing out.

None of us have to rebuild alone.

From Hustle to Home…
This is Fatherhood, Rebuilt.

— Spence Harris
The Daddiez Coach™

Would love to hear what you guys think 🤔

I’ll start in the comments.

I’m curious about the range of fathers we’ve got in here.

How old were you when you became a father — and looking back, did you feel ready?

I was 30 btw.

Biological dads, stepdads, adoptive dads, foster dads — however fatherhood found you, I’m interested.

Fellas, I want to share one of the conversations that really helped shape what Fatherhood Rebuilt means to me.

I spent time listening to and learning from 300 fathers about their experiences with fatherhood.

Different ages.

Different backgrounds.

Different relationships with their children.

Different relationships with their own fathers.

But the more I listened, the more I started noticing patterns.

And eventually, those patterns revealed what I believe are four stages fathers move through as we rebuild ourselves and our relationships with our children.

Some fathers are just beginning to recognize what needs to change.

Some are confronting things they inherited from their own fathers.

Some are learning how to repair relationships and become more present.

And some are beginning to build something completely different for the generation coming behind them.

That’s what this episode is about.

Not becoming a perfect father.

Becoming an intentional one.

I wanted to share this video early in this community because, honestly, it explains a lot about why I created Fatherhood Rebuilt in the first place.

🎥 Watch here:
https://youtu.be/Pp\_upyQmq7g

But after you watch it, come back here because I want to hear from you.

What are you rebuilding in your fatherhood right now?

Maybe it’s your patience.

Your relationship with your son or daughter.

Your ability to be present.

Your marriage.

The way you handle anger.

The way you discipline.

Your relationship with God.

Or maybe you’re trying to build something you never had modeled for you at all.

Whatever it is, put it in the comments.

Because one of the things those 300 fathers taught me is that a whole lot of us are fighting battles we think we’re fighting alone.

We’re not.

That’s part of why this room exists.

— Spence Harris
The Daddiez Coach
Brick by brick. 🧱

Before we start talking about everything we’re struggling with, I want to start Fatherhood Rebuilt with a different question.

What kind of father are you trying to become?

Not what kind of father are you right now.

Not whether you’ve screwed up.

Not whether your marriage is perfect.

Not whether you’ve lost your temper.

Not whether your relationship with your kids looks exactly how you want it to look today.

I’m asking:

When your children are grown and somebody asks them what it was like having you as their father… what do you hope they say?

Maybe:

“My dad was present.”

“I could talk to him about anything.”

“He kept his word.”

“He taught me how to handle life.”

“He loved my mom well.”

“He admitted when he was wrong.”

“He made me feel safe.”

“He broke cycles that had been in our family for generations.”

“My dad showed me what faith looked like, not just what it sounded like.”

Whatever your answer is, put it below.
Because here’s something I believe:

Fatherhood changes when we stop measuring ourselves only by yesterday’s mistakes and start getting clear about the man we’re building tomorrow.

That’s what Fatherhood Rebuilt is about.

We’re going to help each other close that gap.

So here’s your first assignment in this community:

Finish this sentence in the comments:

“When my children are grown, I want them to say their father was __________.”

Don’t overthink it.

One word.

One sentence.

A whole paragraph.

Whatever comes out.

I’ll go first in the comments.

— Spence Harris
The Daddiez Coach
Brick by brick. 🧱

Hey fellas! I’m Spence Harris, The Daddiez Coach, and I created r/Fatherhood_Rebuilt.

I built this community because I wanted fathers to have a place where we can talk honestly about the parts of fatherhood that don’t always make it into everyday conversation.

The wins.

The mistakes.

The anger we regret.

The conversations with our kids we wish we could do over.

Marriage and relationships.

Discipline.

Providing without disappearing.

Healing wounds from our own fathers.

Breaking generational cycles.

Faith.
Purpose.
Brotherhood.

And figuring out how to become the fathers our children actually need.

You don’t have to have fatherhood figured out to belong here.

You just have to be willing to keep becoming better.
What to Post

Bring the real stuff.

Ask questions about situations you’re dealing with at home.

Share something you learned the hard way.

Tell us about a win you had with your child this week.

Talk about something you’re struggling with.

Ask other fathers how they would handle a situation.

Share resources, stories, encouragement, and lessons that could help another father.

And if you screwed something up?

You don’t have to clean the story up before you tell it.

Bring that too.

Community Vibe

This isn’t a room for perfect fathers.
And we’re not interested in pretending to be.

No shame. But accountability.
No perfect dads. But fathers committed to growth.

We can disagree without disrespecting each other.

We can hold another father accountable without tearing him apart.

And when a father comes here struggling, the goal isn’t to pile on.

Help him figure out his next right move.

This should become the kind of room where a father can say:

“Fellas, I don’t know what to do here…”

…and know there are other fathers willing to help him figure it out.

How to Get Started

1) Introduce yourself in the comments below.
Tell us:
How old are your kids?
And what’s ONE area of fatherhood you’re trying to get better at right now?

2) Post something.
A question. A struggle. A win. A lesson. A situation you’re trying to figure out.
You never know which father needs the conversation you’re afraid to start.

3) Help another father.
If you’ve already walked through something another dad is struggling with, don’t just scroll past him.
Talk to him.

4) Invite another father.
If you know a dad who would benefit from conversations like these, bring him into the room.

I’m going to be here regularly starting conversations, answering questions, sharing free resources, and sometimes sharing longer teachings I’ve created when a subject deserves more than I can fit into a Reddit post.

But ultimately, I don’t want this to become Spence talking to everybody.
I want fathers talking to fathers.
I want brotherhood.
I want men helping each other become better fathers than we were yesterday.

My name is Spence Harris. I’m The Daddiez Coach.

Welcome to Fatherhood Rebuilt.
Let’s rebuild fatherhood together.
Brick by brick. 🧱

[supprimé]

I’ll start.

Mine is that being physically present and being emotionally present aren’t the same thing.

I used to think showing up was enough.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized kids remember how they felt around you more than whether you were simply in the room.

I’m curious…

If you could go back and give yourself one piece of fatherhood advice before your first child was born, what would it be?

I’ll go first.

I thought patience was something you either had or didn’t have.

Fatherhood taught me it’s something you practice… and some days you fail at it.

What’s something becoming a dad humbled you about?

I’ll start.

Mine is that being physically present and being emotionally present aren’t the same thing.

I used to think showing up was enough.

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized kids remember how they felt around you more than whether you were simply in the room.

I’m curious…

If you could go back and give yourself one piece of fatherhood advice before your first child was born, what would it be?