u/Traditional-Solid-43

LOL weird question I know. The thing is, I'm a private English tutor to a 9 year old ENTP girl (Everything about her screams ENTP. I can just tell. Her Ne is off the roof and there's no shadow of a doubt that she's a logical thinker and has little to no feeler blood in her lol. She's been an avid reader since she was 6 years old; she's SO intelligent. I'm blown away honestly. Her level of comprehension, curiosity and wit is out of this world. Anyway, I'm an INFJ and we also get along SUPERB like the popular matching says. Our humor's very similar and we just can talk and talk forever), and ever since I knew her 3 years ago, she would always insinuate that boys are a nuisance and she shows zero interest in boys. As far as I remember, my ENTP brother also didn't really particularly care much about girls up till like... high school. I'm also reminded of another girl I knew when I was a kid whom I'm pretty sure was an ENTP, and she was also mostly just full of confidence, top of her class and doing her own thing.

You see.. this is the complete opposite of ME as a kid. I remember having a million innocent crushes ever since in kindergarten, including teachers (all before high school)! Heck, I had a crush on a boy in my class and for this little class party we had, we could choose a boy to have us kiss us on the cheek, and I chose HIM HAHA. I still have that photo! I was 5.

So yeah, is this a feeler, thinker difference type of thing???? What're your guys' experience?

Does Fi have anything to do with wanting to be taken care of? I know some ENFPs and INTJs (both with Fi) and I've noticed that these types love being take care of. The healthy ones really appreciate the little things that others do for them and the unhealthy ones almost neglect themselves just so that there would be more reasons for them to be taken care of (? if that makes sense).

For e.g, I have Fe as my second function and I actually would rather do things for people and I absolutely LOVE it when I see the Fi people around me absolutely appreciate it. That's super rewarding for me, and that's how I get my kick. I love knowing that I helped this person, and that my love was acknowledged. I actually feel a little annoyed by other Fe's around me that WANT to do things for ME lol because that's MY role!! haha.

That's why I was wondering whether there's an innate desire for Fi users in that way just like Fe users have this innate itch to want to provide and give constantly. I do think that Fi users are more giving when it comes to their hearts? whereas Fe users are more about the physical things. For e.g, I naturally want to help and make sacrifices, but I still have qualms about opening my heart to this certain person entirely. But Fi users seem to be the opposite. They might not be as observant of the other person's needs or "care-taking" per se, but their hearts are more... loyal and genuine??

I know some ENFPs that aren't mentally healthy, and they all identify as ESTJ for some reason. But as an MBTI enthusiast and an INFJ (I can usually tell ENFPs pretty quick by their Ne and also because we're pretty similar), I know so surely in my heart that they're ENFP. It's funny how they claim that they are T but they are NOWHERE near being an actual T. They scream "feeling" all over. And they're nowhere being a J either lol because I'm a J, I know what kind of regimented mind you'd have as a J. They're so much more laidback when it comes to schedule.

Though I can see how the test might give ESTJ as the result because after all they do have the same functions as ENFP.

Just curious, do you guys ever feel like an ESTJ when you're stressed or something?

Have you ever held on to a person even if you were no longer keeping in contact with them?

Does it last weeks, months, years?

Is it out of sight, out of mind?

I only started investing 3 months ago, when reddit was FILLED with EXPERTS. Everyone was so hyped up about the usuals: NBIS, MU, SNDK, SLS, RKLB, ASTS.... etc. I remember all those posts where people were asking which stock to buy and 90% of the comments said SNDK. Now, the stock has gone even below what it was then. People were saying SNDK was going to go to $2000, $3000, $4000. They were SO optimistic, with a whole lot of conviction. Well..... all the experts have disappeared now.

If there's one reason why I think memory stocks might go back up once more is because... NO ONE expected it to go down. Not this much anyway. It was a complete surprise. Now, in this bloodbath that we're in, I'm thinking it could go the other way round once more. NO ONE thinks it'll go back up like it did before, because the charts look brutal. Just like everyone thought it was literally impossible for it to fall this horrendously but it DID, maybe everyone thinks it's impossible for it to go back up again, but it WILL.

I'm 31F and the other day, I was on my investing app, where when you enter the page of the stock that you bought, you can leave comments (very similar to reddit) and such. Maybe it's because my stocks were down a little, I felt very unstable, insecure and scared deep inside. And I felt so unforgiving, not AT ALL generous (opposite to how I normally am), and I simply wanted to attack anyone that said anything that mildly got on my nerves. And I got into an online argument with some dude in the comment section, basically both of us trying to prove that the other was stupid, saying stupid things.

After that incident, I was DRAINED. It was only a back and forth of like 3 comments to each other, but I felt SO exhausted. And guilty. And shameful. It kept bothering me at the back of my mind. I hated that I got into such a situation, and I feel like I was saying things that FELT like truth, which I wasn't even convinced or confident about. Basically, I acted like I knew what I was saying, when I didn't. I just wanted to bring him down with this aggressiveness, is all. Now I think the dude actually was more towards being right, actually. But in that moment I couldn't help it. I NEEDED to prove that "idiot" wrong and I felt like I really wanted to annihilate him (online.. through words).

And then a few more days pass, and now I'm wondering WHAT the hell was that about. Right now, I honestly couldn't care less about whether I was right or wrong. I just don't CARE about "winning" against some random stranger! I just don't care. It's so insignificant to me, and it's not even FUN. If for whatever reason that guy sent me a long ass message of criticism and attack once more, I honestly wouldn't even read it and move on with my life because it's just so BORING. This is my normal state: I find online arguments meaningless, pointless, tedious and boring. I didn't know why I was so possessed with that righteous superiority and need for destruction. Then I realised, wait, was THAT animus possession?

I was exposed to physical violence by my dad when I was young, lesser towards me but more towards my older brother, which I think was maybe even more traumatic. To be the witness and not be able to do anything.

Back then I was also living in a third world country, where law was (still is) inefficient and corrupt and unreliable to say the least. You call the police, they arrive 30mins~1 hour later, it was that kind of travesty of a country. That's why ever since I was a kid, I felt that I had no one to turn to. I was completely on my own. My own house didn't feel safe, nor was the country itself. I couldn't trust my family, I couldn't trust the law.

At age 31, I have a tendency to put on a persona of smiling, unassuming, totally harmless. And especially so in front of people that I instinctively know to be irrational or mean-spirited. I was observing my psyche today, after crying for no specific reason. I realised that I was exhausted. And the reason I always put on this kind of persona is because I'm deathly afraid of conflicts. I used to think it was because I didn't want the atmosphere to be sour and that I was the WISER person to actively avoid arguing or quarreling but after deeper inspection, it was because I felt powerless during conflicts. I would just completely freeze, and I wouldn't know how to express myself in a logical, smart way. I DON'T know HOW to say that I feel wronged, I don't know HOW to attack (with words) the other person even if I wanted to. I just freeze up and escape the situation because my words are completely weak and nonexistent.

I'm very envious of people that can stand their ground and formulate their opinions in a logical way. I'm not a nice person for not fighting back, I'm just powerless. There was even a situation a few months ago where this old man poked me hard with his cane at a bank and started attacking me with words because I had accidentally stepped on his shoe and walked on without realising it, and I just stood there completely numb and profusely apologized. I should've expressed anger at the fact that he pretty much used that cane as a weapon on me and that he SHOULDN'T do that, but no words came out. And then I came back home and felt immense ager towards the old man, and then even more anger towards myself because I had betrayed myself and left it completely defenseless. It's pitiful.

And with this lingering fear that I constantly have in the back of mind of knowing that if a situation was to go awry at any moment, that I cannot trust myself to say or act in a way where I can protect myself, it's very disheartening and it feels hopeless. It feels like I have neither sword nor armor.

I want to change this part of me, but I'm not good with words, and I don't know where to even go about individuating(?) myself.

I'm an INFJ and almost 10 years ago, I babysat a 10 year old boy, we'll call him Max. I was 22 then. We got along INCREDIBLY well. Our humor, way of thinking were so similar. I was so glad that he made this job very easy for me, and I absolutely adored him! Max would always tell me that I was the best nanny ever, and he was never shy of showing me affection. Even too much, at times. Of course back then I knew nothing about MBTI, but I just knew that this bond was something special. Because it was all so easy. I always understood his underlying intentions, and therefore never misunderstood him and he seemed to think that I was funny and interesting (words that I never really associated with myself).

Then one day, I remember looking at him and thinking 'I want to marry someone like him'. Someone with his characteristics. That's the ONLY time in my life even to this day where I thought I wanted to MARRY a certain kind of person. I thought it was a funny thought to have. Of course, by then, I've had a million and one crushes on all sorts of guys, but to think about 'MARRIAGE', invoked by a chirpy 10 year old boy? It was weird.

It's been 10 years, and Max's mother still sends me emails on my birthday every year. Now we live in completely different continents, yet she still keeps me updated on her children (including Max) that I took care of. And one day the topic of MBTI came up (and by this time I was somewhat well-versed on it) and she said that Max was in fact, an ENFP haha.

I wasn't at all surprised. 😂

There you go, you nervous, anxious, fearful folks. EJ said it, "control your emotions".

"Crazy people tweeting at you" LOL, he even answered this. This is why he blocked some of you. 'cause you were acting like panicked, crazy people from one drawback in the stock market. That's what the stock market IS. of COURSE you'd seem delusional.

'cause I actually don't lol. I just really like EJ as a person, I have 80000 shares in but I don't know anything about crypto. It'd be awesome if the stock went up to $5 or even $20 or whatever but I honestly am not exactly sure if this company has it in it to go up that much aside from the excitement about the merge.

Even HUGE profitable companies like Sofi is below $20 per stock. What even is the outlook for this company long-term? Just curious

I think having conviction in a certain stock can be a very dangerous thing. It is what makes someone put a large portion if not all their money into that stock. Before I started investing, I didn't understand why people wouldn't diversify. Why they were so greedy. Why they weren't content with the already large sum that they just earned by just sitting around.

Welp, I didn't know that I was that kind of person too, but I found out the hard way that human greed is not that easy to tame. It's NOT easy to put only $5000 on a stock that you BELIEVE will go up really high. FOMO wouldn't allow it. Your greed wouldn't allow it. But the stock market never moves the way you think it will. It's always 50-50. I've heard of people who were distraught about having bought NVIDIA in the way early days and ending up being bagholders... of NVIDIA lol. They had no idea. "Nobody actually knows nothing", like what John Bogle said his really intelligent peers have all said.

I feel like the stock market readily tackles the VERY fundamental parts of a human being. Incessantly comparing with others, jealousy, greed, pleasure, despair, horror, panic, anxiety... lol.

Maybe a monk might do best in the stock market.

I'm 31. I've never had a boyfriend, never had a proper job in my life, I don't have any friends. Yet, I know I've been loved by people I've crossed paths with in my life and that I'm not a complete nuisance. 8 years ago, I babysat two kids from a house for 8 months and the mom STILL writes to me to this day on New Years and on my birthday (I've since moved to a whole different continent!). And I've been a part time teacher to a child for about 4 years now, we have the greatest time together. I know some people might not think this is anything, but it's incredibly validating for me because it makes me think that I must've done something right and it feels especially nice knowing that these mothers must trust and appreciate me and that I'm not a complete failure.

It's in fact my love for these children that made me realise that what I receive from my parents isn't love. They're not capable of it. They might do nice things for me once in a while but that's for THEIR ego and comfort. Just like how it's very easy for me to be friendly towards people (it's just in my nature) but that's because it just comes so naturally to me and doesn't take any effort. And that's the hardest thing. When they're nice, they seem normal. And I think I just wanted to hold on to this version of them.

The thing is, I'm so enmeshed with them that I feel like I won't be able to live this life without them. I have no sense of self outside of being their daughter. And having no friends doesn't help at all (My mom told me when I was around 10: "friends all fade and they don't matter. They're the least important thing in life." How tragic that that young girl had to hear such horrible ideology of life). All my life I've put on a mask and 'acted' a certain way, and one way to describe this feeling is that I feel NAKED without this superficial mask on. It feels like now I'm forced to go outside naked without any clothes. Everyone else is wearing clothes, but not me.

I've been conditioned to believe that the world is filled with evil people, that even the LAW is to be scorned, that the world is out to get you, that feeling any sense of hope is STUPID and being childlike and gullible, that anyone I befriend is or let close to be are no good people. And yet these two are the most irrational, abnormal people of them all. I now look back at SO many episodes in my life, and how 'weird' they were. To this day, the deaths of all my grandparents on both sides are just something that happened and no one talks about it. There's no palpable sadness, no healthy nostalgic talk, no nothing. It's like it never even happened. They just shove everything under the rug and pretend nothing ever happened. It's SO weird. Oh yeah, also, when I was still just a kid, I did some bad things. I stole something, I hacked into my friend's email, and when my parents found out about it, they actually LAUGHED it off. I was relieved that I wasn't going to get punished, but there was an eerie sense of something being 'off' there. And when it comes to the TINIEST most inconsequential things, they rage and complain. Ridiculous. And they don't care whether my relationship with my brother is good or not. They only care that I'm there for them. And unsurprisingly, my brother and I are pretty estranged. And my brother cut them off. I thought he was being dramatic, but I think he made the right choice.

Anyway, I feel entirely hopeless and incapable of living in this world. The good thing is I recently earned quite a bit of money through investing (the first time I've ever earned some form of meaningful money) so for now I don't feel an imminent sense of financial danger (I've felt this my entire life). I don't live with them, but we live SO close and because they have no friends and are old, I feel the need to help them out with things. Like online banking or whatever, once in a while. I really don't want to, but I feel so guilty and like I'm doing something really bad if I don't help them. They rely on me for all the technology-related things like the internet, phone problems, online delivery etc.

Can you guys put some sense into my world? Do give me tips on how I should go about moving forward, what mindset is important to have and what has helped you. I can't believe I've been struggling with this bs for this long. I really want to be free of it once and for all.

I'm 31. I*'ve never had a boyfriend, never had a proper job in my life, I don't have any friends.* Yet, I know I've been loved by people I've crossed paths with and that I'm not a complete nuisance. 8 years ago, I babysat two kids from a house for 8 months and the mom STILL writes to me to this day on New Years and on my birthday (I've since moved to a whole different continent!). And I've been a part time teacher to a child for about 4 years now, we have the greatest time together. I know some people might not think this is anything, but it's incredibly validating for me because it makes me think that I must've done something right and it feels especially nice knowing that these mothers must trust and appreciate me and that I'm not a complete failure.

It's in fact my love for these children that made me realise that what I receive from my parents isn't love. They're not capable of it. They might do nice things for me once in a while but that's for THEIR ego and comfort. Just like how it's very easy for me to be friendly towards people (it's just in my nature) but that's because it just comes so naturally to me and doesn't take any effort. And that's the hardest thing. When they're nice, they seem normal. And I think I just wanted to hold on to this version of them.

The thing is, I'm so enmeshed with them that I feel like I won't be able to live this life without them. I have no sense of self outside of being their daughter. And having no friends doesn't help at all (My mom told me when I was around 10: "friends all fade and they don't matter. They're the least important thing in life." How tragic that that young girl had to hear such horrible ideology of life). All my life I've put on a mask and 'acted' a certain way, and one way to describe this feeling is that I feel NAKED without this superficial mask on. It feels like now I'm forced to go outside naked without any clothes. Everyone else is wearing clothes, but not me.

I've been conditioned to believe that the world is filled with evil people, that even the LAW is to be scorned, that the world is out to get you, that feeling any sense of hope is STUPID and being childlike and gullible, that anyone I befriend is or let close to be are no good people. And yet these two are the most irrational, abnormal people of them all. I now look back at SO many episodes in my life, and how 'weird' they were. To this day, the deaths of all my grandparents on both sides are just something that happened and no one talks about it. There's no palpable sadness, no healthy nostalgic talk, no nothing. It's like it never even happened. They just shove everything under the rug and pretend nothing ever happened. It's SO weird. Oh yeah, also, when I was still just a kid, I did some bad things. I stole something, I hacked into my friend's email, and when my parents found out about it, they actually LAUGHED it off. I was relieved that I wasn't going to get punished, but there was an eerie sense of something being 'off' there. And when it comes to the TINIEST non-important things, they rage. Ridiculous.

Anyway, I feel entirely hopeless and incapable of living in this world. The good thing is I recently earned quite a bit of money through investing (the first time I've ever earned some form of meaningful money) so for now I don't feel an imminent sense of financial danger (I've felt this my entire life). I don't live with them, but we live SO close and because they have no friends and are old, I feel the need to help them out with things. Like online banking or whatever, once in a while. I really don't want to, but I feel so guilty and like I'm doing something really bad if I don't help them. They rely on me for all the technology-related things like the internet, phone problems, online delivery etc.

Can you guys put some sense into my world? Do give me tips on how I should go about moving forward, what mindset is important to have and what has helped you. I can't believe I've been struggling with this bs for this long. I really want to be free of it once and for all.

I grew up in a household where mom and dad were emotionally turbulent, explosive outbursts, constant complaints and negativity, physical violence. It messed me up a lot. There was so much internal fear and anxiety, just LIVING. I'm sure many of you have gone through similar things.

All throughout my 20s, even though I didn't live with my family after that, I went through deep depression/existential crisis, and got into any and everything that could alleviate my suffering: from philosophy to psychology to spirituality to religion.

The other day, I was laying in my bed staring up at the ceiling and a realisation hit me. Right then and there in my room, in this 3D physical space of mine, I was all alone. There wasn't ANYONE else. Just me. All alone. So quiet. Nothing happening. I was physically safe. No one was bothering me anymore. Not even a pip squeak unless I was up and moving about. I wasn't living in a household where shouting and anger were the norm anymore. In fact, this was ALL I had hoped for as a kid. Just a quiet, safe, calm space. THIS was my BIGGEST DREAM. And I was LIVING it.

Since then whenever I go outside and walk about in the streets, I really let it sink in in my mind that despite the busy people everywhere, the hectic roads, the noise etc, no one is going out of their way to do ANY harm to me. Even there, I'm COMPLETELY safe, physically. If there's any distress or anxiety that I feel, it's my MIND that's creating it, not my immediate surroundings. These strangers have NEVER done anything to me EVER in my 30 years of living. They never snatched my bag and startled me or anything have they? They never came up to me and called me names! They never pushed me or shouted at me or caused ANY physical harm to me whatsoever. They're all just minding their own business, hanging out with friends, going to groceries, jogging around, heading off to their homes. And yet I've always lived in fear and anxiety of going outside and being around people. People that have done NOTHING to me.

Sure, you were in harm's way when you were a kid. Sure, you were beaten, you had to see and hear things that were too much for a kid. But just really look around you right now and let your surroundings sink in. Are there people shouting at you, THIS instant? Anyone raising their arm to slap you? Is there a gunman at your door? A frowning old lady patronising you? A dangerous and strange looking man leering at you?

The answer is NO.

There's NO ONE there. There's NO DANGER. It's your MIND, your THOUGHTS. Right now, you're ALL ALONE. You're SAFE. It's just you and.. well.. air. You and your bed. Bedsheets. desk. chair. carpet. EVERYONE that troubles you lives in your head. Let them go. And focus on the present moment where there's NO ONE right in front of your very two eyes. Don't believe in the memories and thoughts created by your MIND, believe in your senses in the present moment. When you're a kid, the senses are ALL that you rely on. We hardly think about what anyone thinks about us. Nor do WE think about anyone. We let things go very quickly, even the most painful circumstances. But when we get older, our ego develops and we shift almost entirely into the mind and start going over and over EVERYTHING in the mind, but mostly, perceived negative situations.

I do still use my mind a lot, but I'm at least AWARE of my physical space every so often and I don't let myself fall into the blackhole of the thinking mind. I feel liberated now, about 90% and I wish you guys would be free of your pain too.

What I don't get is, why did d4vd leave Celeste's body to rot in HIS car in a PUBLIC area for months? did he WANT to get caught? Was he dumb enough to think that the body wouldn't decompose? If he didn't want to get caught, wouldn't he have disposed of the body somewhere? It baffles me because it's such a dumb move.

What do you guys think?