For my fellow reheaters; its day 263 without heated rivalry, so here's a Temu Version of it to keep you going.

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I genuinely find it to be my favorite season. I’m not sure if it’s the trope, the representation or the very attractive leads but I lowkey didn’t expect it to be the lowest performing season. I thought it was 2nd atleast if not my first favorite season of all.

episode 1:
When Shane introduces himself to ilya, he follows it by saying “oh i don’t think you’re allowed to smoke here” but he also mimics the smoking action because he’s not sure if ilya fully understood what he said or if he understood english that well.

Before the gym scene, we see Shane in bed in his thoughts, as he gets up to put on his infamous bottom wear, he quiet neatly makes up his bed. Another one of his on the spectrum traits.

peloton saw hudson on that bike in that gym scene and immediately knew they had to have him

wired headphones because we’re in 2008

he placed that bottle between his legs ON PURPOSE, to sway those eyes

ilya came on a lot harder
the gym, asking him to drink more water, calling him pretty, being caught staring at him during the game (his coach asks him if there’s something more important when he catches his eyes wandering off), the whole commercial being HIS idea. mans was not subtle

Shane wearing a suit for their hookup— was insane. No one but shane would do that,,, what did he think was gonna happen? they were gonna have a sit down talk about what went down in the showers and come to a truce? was he gonna sign a business deal?
any meaning behind the background sea lion song? other than the lyric “marry the man” while he’s staring at his reflection of him in a suit?

ilya favorite stim is cupping shane’s pecs

“you saw me in the showers” comment. Shane still being insecure of the whole situation. Having to be asked to strip. parallels with those strap mascs that are known to never take off their clothes during intercourse.

the world coming apart for Shane when ilya said “okay, that was fun”.
“are you SERIOUS “
Shane says Holy Shit when he experiences things for the first time
said it when he gets head for the first time
said it before he says i love you for the first time
ilya isn’t a complete asshole during their first night—- he said goodnight first

Shane is the goalie 3 months later— ilya says he never said 40– liar, liar said that, it was 50
only made this claim BECAUSE shane was the goalie. the goal insinuating his butt

Year 2010/2011– ode to youtube. it was when it really started to take off (i went down the youtube rabbit hole of unlikely friends) also fairly obvious but it’s clearly in reference to his relationship with ilya as they’re rivals. shane’s the baby, ilyas the snake.

Yuna saying fuck him, right up the butt will never not be funny all while Shane sits there blushing

ilya thinks Shane is perfect when he mimics his interview in french “how does it feel to be perfect? fucking perfect.”

Cheetos being a sponsor lol.. it’s on the bleachers and i think i remember it being in the fruit bowl in the cottage episode

ilya honestly didn’t even take that long to open the door when Shane knocked. mr drama queen wanted to get in those pants as fast as possible

and i think it’s a shane thing again to keep his socks on during intercourse?? he kept it on the second time and ilya just lets him be.

“no, no Hollander, i want to *uck you” ugghdhejejjejeje the way he says that. whyyyy does he like him so much. cheesin so much my jaw hurt

definitely didn’t notice this before
the reassurance ilya gives shane with the most tender kiss after he says “Hollander, you are having panic attack, it is just a plan to *uck”. so endearing.. and just so beautiful

the pure joy on shane’s face after getting ilya’s number without even having to ask. He knows Shane so well already

“Next time, i guess” turns into 4 MONTHS LATER
Ilya looooves when Shane gets mad. his fetish

aight that’s a wrap on ep 1

i’ve never been more grateful to be alive in the same time period as experiencing heated rivalry

A - A weak backhand?

B - Bolshe, Bolshe, Bolshe

C - i'm COMING to the COTTAGE

D - Da, like that, Hollander

E - Everyone, Shane Hollander is an *sshole

F - Fuck you. You’re unbelievable. You suck my dick

G - gimme kiss / Gurl

H - Holy Shit, I love you too

I - is Lie, Liar told you that / I want to *uck you, Hollander

J - Jane

K - Does it fuking kill you too?

L - Lovers

M - Mr. Businessman, Mr. Landlord, Mr. Real Estate

N - Not here

O - Okay, you cut it in Half, what you cant do math?

P- yu luk PREH-TEE

Q - Questions.. you have too many of them

R - RUSSIA. I will not be able to go back to Russia

S - Stupid, Canadian Wolf Bird

T - Tuna melt?

U - Unlikely animals becoming friends, like a tiger and a bear...

V- Vodka

W - Wow, genetic / What color? / We didn't even kiss.

X - The highly anticipated X Squad sequel

Y- Your family is here.. Your BOYFRIEND is here

Z - roZy

When Shane said
“nice shirt”
to which ilya said
“thanks, i like to uh you know get into the spirit”

didn’t know Shane went by the name spirit

Have there been any actors that played a queer role on screen and then ended up dating them?

This scene nearly doesn't get mentioned enough. the butterflies i got when theyre on the couch at the cottage making out..

Wait, um, it's been a while,
so I might not last long.

Yes, same,
but we have two weeks.

Yeah, cool.

W-wait, same?

Mmm.

You said "same."

You haven't been
with anyone lately?

No.

Not since...

No, not since, so can we...

Really?

Really?

Hollander, it's not
a big deal, OK?

Yeah, but it's been...

Months, yes, I know.

So can we f*ck now, please?

I haven't either.

Not since the last time.

aHHSHdkhahdhdwpoqp, Shane is so cute learning of Ilya's temporary celibateness

its so cute

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i would LOOOOOOve to see shondaland take up the selection series; book to TV Adaptation