u/Vox_Tenebris_

Just a few words, or short sentences, I've heard over the past decade or so:

• Stoic (I've heard this one more times than I can remember)
• Confident
• Serious
• Intense
• Formal
• Analytical
• Quiet (Most of the time)
• Charismatic/Magnetic/Convincing (when I'm comfortable and talking about something important to me or that I'm passionate about)
• "You speak with authority"
• "A Strong Personality"
• "Very thoughtful"
• "You've got a big heart."

May also be worth noting that I've been told many times that I'm very mature, often being considered to be ten years older than I actually am, among other things.

Just want to see what you all get out of this, what impression these words give you.

Mainly considering either 1, 3, 6, or 7. Wanted some other perspectives.

• I'm not an impulsive person. While I can adapt on the fly and do things on a whim from time to time, handling chaotic situations fairly well, I almost always have to have some kind of plan of action before I begin something. I like to know what I'm going to do before I do it, or at least have a general framework to operate within so that I can handle things as well as possible. So while I can handle myself in uncontrolled situations, it's definitely not my preference.
• Following on the last point, I'm good at organizing and directing people. Used to be the one who'd lead group projects in school and in university, and I've always found myself most comfortable and happy in management positions in my line of work.
• While I was shy as a kid, I came out of my shell and became a lot more confident by my early twenties and now love speaking in front of crowds anytime that I can. Dream job is one where I can do public speaking and have a positive impact on the lives of other people. Been told I can be "very convincing" and that I have a presence/aura about me when I enter a room by friends, "magnetic" by one of my exes, and that I "speak with authority" by one of my relatives.
• Despite all of that, people know me for being - generally - quiet and fairly stoic and serious. I was always introverted and difficult to get to know, but have gradually become more social in my twenties. Still, I'm definitely a loner and prefer to spend most of my free time alone. Prefer it that way. Combined with the previous point, I've always said "I want to help the world without being a part of it."
• I tend to prefer to keep things relatively simple and uncomplicated. A common saying of mine is that - "the more moving parts there are, the more likely something is to break." - it's better to have a simple and clean cut system that can be relied on again and again to get the job done so that we don't have to worry about constantly adjusting every little thing when the situation or circumstances change. Moreover, generally speaking, I think people often overcomplicate things. It's better to look at the totality of a situation, try to isolate the most important parts and distill them down into easily understood concepts, and move forward with that - instead of trying to create the perfect solution to every single problem.
• Something that's important is that I have strong values and a sense of integrity. Always try to treat other people fairly and to do right by them. If I feel I've wronged someone or anything else of the sort, I genuinely feel guilty about it and it will haunt me long after the event has passed. I simply expect more of myself in such situations and can get annoyed at myself for not living up to my own expectations (i.e. "You're better than that; you can do better.") That also extends to my work, where I care a lot about making sure that anything I take responsibility for is done properly and done right; if I actually care about something on any real level, I don't feel good leaving it half-finished or unsatisfactory. On the other hand, if I consider something unimportant or a waste of time, I really couldn't care less.
• If I get into something new, I will spend the next several days fixated on it. I will continue to learn all that there is to know about it until my interest is exhausted, just absorbing as much information as I can about whatever topic has caught my interest, then drop it and move onto the next thing when my curiosity is sated. It's rare that something holds my interest over the long-term - I can have a hard time sticking to routines if I begin to consider them arbitrary - but the few things that do stick with me become quite special to me.
• When it comes to evaluating anything, I take a logical approach. I often try to be as objective as possible when evaluating a major problem, always making an effort to discard any personal presumptions or biases to focus on the best possible solution that I can see based on the information at hand. I tend to get annoyed by abstract speculation, or arguments that are entirely moral or emotional in nature. If you can't prove anything with hard evidence and reason, then I have no interest in hearing it. This kind of follows on my point about my integrity. I'd never openly align myself with anything, or espouse any specific beliefs about the best possible solution to any major issues or questions, if I didn't feel completely confident that I'm right based on what I know from the facts and verifiable information available.

So, what do you think? Feel free to ask any additional questions if you have any.

How would you describe yourself?

I always describe myself as a fairly laid back person most of the time. People in my life usually describe me as "serious" and "intense", but also "confident" and even "charismatic." Even had a romantic partner describe me as "magnetic" a little while back. Relatives and friends consider me "thoughtful" and that I have a "big heart" despite my quiet and serious demeanor.

That's something I think is a critical part of me that I didn't realize for a long time is that I have this innate reflex of caring for others and treating people fairly. Even if I don't like someone I don't want them to be treated in a way I think is unfair. Looking back at my childhood and teens, I think an easy example of this is how I played video games as a teenager. I would always strive for "the best" outcome and try to save as many people as I could in games where choices mattered. I would feel guilty or wrong even if I tried to be 'evil' in-game; It felt so pointless to act that way. I'd reset and keep trying until I got the outcome I thought was the best for the greatest number of people based off of what I knew.

More to the point on my ethical standing - No matter how much I might want out of life, I would never want it to come at someone else's expense. I wouldn't feel good about that. I'd rather be comfortable with myself as a person, to know I'm still who I want to be as an individual, rather than wealthy or powerful. To know that I am who I say I am.

This is something that's become more and more apparent to me over the past few years, as I've gotten older. Throughout my life I've always had hang-ups about certain things that don't feel good or right to me, utterly refusing to compromise on things that I felt a certain way about, but it's become a much more conscious thing as I've come to grips with the realities of the world around me. I'm always mindful of if I feel like I'm making the right choices when it matters.

What do you want out of life? More than anything?

Since I was a teenager, my dream has always been to have a place to get away from everyone and everything. Whether it was imagining a huge mansion as a teenager, or a cabin in the woods in my early twenties, or simply a nice piece of farmland with a decently sized home where I could live peacefully away from everything as I wish for now - that has always been the core desire. Everything else revolves around that.

I do want to have a positive impact on the world, a large part of me wants to be up on stage in front of an audience of thousands as I speak. Making use of my speaking abilities that I've developed throughout my life and giving other people hope. Even when I wanted to be super rich as a teenager, I still dreamed of donating massive amounts of money to medical research and to help those in need. But at the end of the day, if I don't have my place where I can get away from everything, I'm not sure what I'd do.

What is the worst thing you can imagine happening to yourself?

The worst thing for me would be losing my ability to be independent and live life on my own terms. When I imagine this, I usually think of it either physically (e.g. stroke, paraplegia, or some other neurological cause that would make me dependent on others) - or mentally (e.g. Alzheimer's/Dementia, psychosis, paranoid schizophrenia, etc.) I always figure that I can come back from anything as long as my mind and body are intact. I have full confidence in myself and refuse to give up.

No matter what else happens in my life. No matter if I'm successful or not, my one thing has always been wanting to be my own person and never needing to depend on others. To decide things for myself and doing my best to never let anyone else influence my opinions. It took me a long time to accept that it was okay to ask for help when I needed it because of my own pride and belief that I can handle anything life throws at me. Realized that you look a lot stupider when you're stubbornly refusing help when you need it.

What are your greatest talents?

When I'm committed to something, I tend to be ruthlessly efficient and thorough. I've been told countless times that I'm a "natural leader" and a "strong presence" in a room - following up on the comments I've gotten about being intense and serious.

I naturally take to organizing and directing others to get things done, and genuinely enjoy being in charge. There's a satisfaction I get from it, alongside genuinely wanting to orchestrate things to get the best possible results (or the desired result). I not only like being in control, but demonstrating that I'm really good at it too. If I'm not living up to a certain standard, then I feel like I could be doing more.

What would you consider your greatest flaw(s)?

I tend to live in my own head a lot. While I do work out three to five times per week, I tend to live a very sedentary lifestyle. I think a lot about doing various things, but rarely act on them unless I feel a serious compulsion to do so. Still, I can be impulsive at times. Though for me that manifests as simply choosing to eat at a new restaurant, indulging in food or other things. For most things that are unknown to me, I usually like to take serious time to think it over and prepare before acting.

I also have constantly fluctuating interests. I've been like this for as long as I can remember. I tend to fixate on something for varying lengths of time, diving deep into it for days or weeks at time until my interest is exhausted. After drifting away and finding something else, I may have completely forgotten about whatever I was fixated on previously.

So, what do you think?

Ever since I figured out my type in a long conversation back in May/June, I haven't really been around as much on here, but decided I'd post again for the first time in a while.

For a long time I didn't think of myself as an ENTP. I simply didn't relate to the stereotypes at all. I actually tended to relate a lot more to the xxTJ types. But then - through a conversation with someone more knowledgeable in the community over about a month or so - I began to realize that I related more to the defining traits of Ne than I thought.

Mainly a few key things:

• Throughout my life, my interests and desires have fluxuated wildly. I rarely stay seriously interested in anything for more than a few days or weeks at most. Though there are a small handful of things that I come back to when nothing new is capturing my interest.
• Often felt frustrated that there wasn't enough time to do everything I ever wanted to do before getting old. Part of my enthusiasm for the future is seeing all the new things the future will bring with regards to entertainment and such. The idea of being stuck doing one thing forever was a large factor of my own lack of commitment to anything in my teens and early 20's.
• On the positive, I'm open to almost anything with new experiences. New foods, new music, and so on. Of course I have my favorites, things I consistently love and don't get tired of, but I'm almost always open to trying new things.
• I also relate to the whole aspect of connecting seemingly random, unrelated things in my mind. Small sparks of inspiration can lead me to developing novel ideas out of seemingly nowhere. This happens on a virtually day-to-day basis.
• This also manifests as seeing numerous possible explanations for any given thing, which I think is a significant part of why it took me a long time to decide on my type in this system. Could always see a new angle or argument that could make sense.
• Altogether, one of my recurring issues is following through on things. I can completely forget about some personal project I was working on within a few days. I am much better about finishing things at this stage in my life, but it is still an issue sometimes.

Of course a common theme here is that I only stick to things so long as they are interesting and engaging to me. Once that interest wears off, I discard it and move onto the next big thing. Aside from a small, chosen few that I come back to - that's generally how it goes.

Is worth noting that my energy isn't overtly positive and enthusiastic, known for being serious and intense. It's more of an aggressive interest where I intend to squeeze as much information and enjoyment as I can out of whatever has caught my attention until my curiosity is sated.

This could be a factor of me being a 7w8 (SP7) within the Enneagram.

What about you? What helped you fully understand your own type?

Just wanted to get some perspectives on this. I'm about 99% sure these three make up my tri-type, and I'm leaning toward E7 the most, but wanted to get some other thoughts and opinions on the core motivations and easily identifiable traits of these three types.

Having beaten both the Dragon and the Wither close to two weeks ago now, and after taking a break for a few days last week, I've been collecting the music discs.

I've gotten every single one that drops from Creepers. Since I refuse to do any mob grinders/farms, I did this naturally out in random plains biomes at night.

Ended up getting a pretty consistent way of getting them lined up for skeletons to shoot after weakening the creepers with a sword strike and a hit with my pickaxe.

So now I'm getting the more difficult ones. I've yet to find a single Ancient City, but I haven't really sought one out yet either. What's more important is I've cleared four or five Bastions and yet to find a single copy of the Piglin music disc.

Had my closest call yet earlier today. Went to fly off of a Bastion with Elytra, didn't realize I didn't have my firework rockets in my hand, and fell into the lava without fire resistance. Fortunately I had (1) a bunch of Golden Apples with me, and (2) almost a stack of blocks from mining through the Bastions themselves. So I dropped down to the bottom of the lava lake, and built a pillar of blackstone to stand on and get out of the lava. Shredded about eight golden apples doing that.

Finding this music disc has been a far greater pain than any amount of fighting the mobs out in the open plains biomes was. I haven't really had any issues fighting the Brutes or regular Piglins, although they are definitely some of the hardest hitting enemies to fight.

Good news is that because I've looted this many Bastions by now, I have more than enough Gold Blocks to construct my first Beacon in Hardcore, so I'm looking forward to that.

Side Note - I also finally got the "Adventuring Time" Advancement too. Took forever to find the last biome I needed, turned out it was the 'stony peaks' biome.

Been keeping you guys updated fairly regularly.

I beat the Dragon on Day 270, beat the Wither on Day 346.

I've cleared three Ocean Monuments and have more than a stack of sponges. I've cleared three Bastions and two Nether Fortresses. Cleared my first Woodland Mansion last night.

Today/tonight I spent most of my time setting up connections in the Nether between my favorite spots on the map. Especially between the village I've decided to make my permanent home, some 14000 Blocks from spawn, and the Woodland Mansion I discovered.

So I put one portal on the second floor of the mansion at the end of a dead-end hallway, and the other in a crater at the center of a snow-covered mountain top near the village. Paths I made to reach them require the Elytra, but I made various landing platforms to make it easier.

From here, my goals at this point are:

• Starting construction on my permanent home base later this week. I'll probably start gathering materials tomorrow with a few shulker boxes.
• Massive project I've found a perfect spot for near the Woodland Mansion.
• Start hunting for an Ancient City.
• Considering getting every advancement. I'm very close to getting the "Adventuring Time" and "Monsters Hunted" advancements. Only need to find one more biome for the former, and only five more enemies for the latter. Already found all the biomes in the Nether.

I'm at that point now where I've done all the major challenges the game has to offer.

Dragon, Wither and Elder Guardians are all taken care of. Will probably fight the Dragon at least one more time, and plan on fighting the Wither several more times to get more beacons.

So now I'm just thinking about what I'd like to do in this world now.

If you have any questions, feel free to ask.

So I've just passed Day 300.

I cleared out and drained two Ocean Monuments right next to each other around Day 200, I've cleared out two Bastions, two Nether Fortresses, four Jungle temples, I don't know how many Outposts. Only major structure I've yet to find is a Woodland Mansion.

I beat the Dragon on Day 270, and shortly after obtained an Elytra from an End City + Ship.

I've got fully upgraded Netherite Armor with Protection IV, Unbreaking III, and Mending. Plus Aqua Afinity and Respiration III on the Helmet, and Feather Falling IV and Depth Strider III on the Boots. Just today I finally got both Mending and Unbreaking III on my Elytra.

Netherite Sword has Sharpness V, Unbreaking III, Mending, Sweeping Edge III and Looting III. Been working on a second Netherite Sword with Smite V and the above enchantments. Fully Upgraded Netherite Pickaxe with Efficiency V, Unbreaking III, Mending, and Fortune III.

At this point, my only major goal left to accomplish is beating the Wither. I've got two Wither Skeleton Skulls, need a third. Then I'll only need to get a few more blocks of gold to make a full size beacon.

I've also discovered all but two of the overworld biomes, so I might as well do that too. I do a lot of walking. Original settlement for my first 100 Days was in a village 4000 blocks away from spawn. According to my screenshots, I discovered it on Day 6.

Current set-up is what started as a Fishing Outpost near three villages, about 12000 blocks from spawn, with the two aforementioned Ocean Monuments (and an outpost I've set up on a Mushroom Island right between the two monuments) about 14000 blocks from spawn. Have four dogs with me, two of which I take with me on adventures now.

Side note, my Fishing spot is one of the most naturally beautiful places I've found:

I usually stand on that Lily Pad when fishing

And I do have a perfect fishing rod with Luck of the Sea III, Lure III and Mending. Not shown here is the simple shack I've built that's directly behind me, with my four dogs, a bed, a few chests, and so on.

So my current checklist is:

1. Beat the Wither and craft a Beacon
2. Find the last two biomes I need
3. Find and clear a Woodland Mansion

After that, I have a few build ideas I'd like to work on.

I should also probably build a Creeper farm to trivialize the crafting of firework rockets. I try to avoid mob grinders because I find them kind of boring, but I see the utility in this.

Overall though, feeling great.

First time playing Minecraft in over a year, and I've been having a great time in Hardcore.

I had a few initial failed attempts last month, but I've got a world going now over the past two weeks and I just passed Day 200 (on Day 203 at the time of this writing). At this point in time, I have:

• Fully Enchanted Netherite Armor. Which means all four pieces have Protection IV, Unbreaking III, and Mending. I also have Feather Falling IV and Depth Strider III Boots, and both Respiration III and Aqua Afinity for the Helmet.
• Fully Upgraded Pickaxe; A Netherite Pickaxe with Efficiency V, Unbreaking III, Mending, and Fortune III. May make a second Pick with Silk Touch eventually, but it's not a priority.
• Almost Fully Upgraded Sword i.e. Netherite Sword with Sharpness IV, Unbreaking III, Mending, Looting III, and Sweeping Edge III. (Need to get Sharpness V, and been debating Fire Aspect II. Do plan on making a Second Sword with Smite V for the eventual Wither Fight.)
• Unfinished Bow with Power III and Unbreaking III. Don't use it that often, but it was very helpful with handling the Wither Skeletons and Blazes in Nether Fortresses.

So far, I've:

• Gotten all the Blaze Rods I'll ever need. Looting III is insanely helpful.
• Have a Total of 19 Eyes of Ender (I haven't fought the Dragon yet)
• Obtained a Total of 48 Pieces of Ancient Debris (half of which went to my four pieces of armor, my sword and my pickaxe)
• Looted two Bastions
• Discovered and Looted a Jungle Temple.
• Have about two dozen Golden Apples, and found one Enchanted Golden Apple too.

Just tonight I finally completed an Ocean Monument. Was honestly a lot of fun for the most part. I cleared out the Elder Guardians pretty quickly. I actually only had one close call and that was in a room full of normal guardians that I'd underestimated, but I got to safety and healed up.

I did manage to drain the entire monument (the interior anyway) and looted the place clean. Was kind of funny placing a bed in one of the central rooms and sleeping in there after I'd completely dried up all the water.

Side note is that the Ocean Monument is right next to a Mushroom Island, which is pretty cool. I can stand on the shore of the mushroom island and see the monument in the water within rendering distance.

Immediate plans from here are to finish working on the villages I've been building up. Once I feel ready, I'll take the plunge and go after the dragon so I can finally get an Elytra as well. I've been very cautious though. I figure you only get one attempt with any of the boss creatures, or any of the more dangerous enemies in general, in Hardcore.

Overall though, I've been having a lot of fun, and I think I've been handling myself very well for someone who (1) hasn't played the game in over a year, and (2) has never done a serious hardcore playthrough before.

Began writing this a week ago as an attempt to be more honest with myself and not shy away from more negative things. Keep in mind that some of the things here are said knowing that they aren't all positive traits to have.

What makes me feel happy?

1. Indulging in my interests. Playing video games, reading, listening to music and audiobooks, walking, exercising, cooking and eating, and so on. Happiest moments in my life are spent lying in bed late at night, when everything is quiet and there's no outside noise, relaxing, listening to some good music or a long video. Preferably after a shower and a great dinner. Physically and emotionally at peace. Very cognizant of when these moments are happening, and revel in them. Those are the moments I seek above all else. Where I can feel completely and totally at ease and immersed in something I find engaging and enjoyable.
2. Being alone; having peace and quiet. I simply wish to be alone and do my own thing. I never imagine myself as being a part of a group. I don't want a family of my own, I cut contact with my closest friends years ago, and I've been genuinely happier for it. In the past, I used to say that I "want to help the world without being a part of it" - which meant living in some isolated corner of the world while funding as many worthwhile causes as I could at a distance.
3. Leading. If being alone isn't an option, I'm at my best when organizing and directing others. Not only do I enjoy it, it's something I'm good at. Often been called a "natural leader" and been told I have a certain presence about me that commands people's attention. Moreover, I always take charge whenever I can in most situations. Feels good to be in control, there's often a genuine adreanline rush that comes with it.
4. Following on that last point. There's a significant part of me that does want to dominate and have more power for the sheer thrill of it - some part of me wants that to be public and visible, another part of me prefers the idea of being in the shadows. When I shed all inhibitions and allow my instincts/impulses to lead me, there's always a desire to push the boundaries - just to see how far I can push it for the sheer thrill. It's a source of enjoyment. Nevertheless, I'd always emphasize the first two points above all.

What am I afraid of?

1. Looking stupid or weak in front of other people. Always trying to maintain the appearance of being perfectly in control and confident at all times when in public. That's how I perceive myself to be, because I truly believe I'm capable anything and everything I set my mind to, and want others to see me as.
2. Losing my independence. I hate the very concept of being dependent on other people; took me a long time to be comfortable with asking for, and accepting, help when I need it. I'm extremely strong-willed. If there's a single word that comes to mind to describe myself, it's "determined" - determined to be my own person and live my own life. Worst thing I could imagine would be losing the ability to live on my own and do things on my own. Nothing scares me more than the thought of not being able to be alone and live life my way.
3. Not having control over my life. Have had a problem with authority ever since I was a little kid. Hate the idea of one having an "obligation" or a "duty" to anyone or anything. You don't "have to" do anything in life that you don't want to. It's your life to live, nobody else's. I see no other rational way to live than for yourself and what you want to do.
4. Never having privacy. I'm deliberately secretive and vague. I'm not shy or socially anxious, but rather have little desire to be around other people. Don't want anyone to really know me. I'd wager that even the people who know me best, online or in-person, only know 20% of who I am at max. I tend to be very territorial and possessive of my private space (e.g. remember physically blocking my parents from entering my room once or twice). Also generally possessive of what is "mine" and "mine alone".
5. Tying several of these points together, I grew up in a situation I desperately wanted to get out of. Thought about running away a few times. Often dreamt of living luxurious lifestyles with ridiculous amounts of wealth, until I grew older and realized that I didn't need all of that to be happy. Just someplace quiet to settle down.

What upsets/angers me (i.e. what irritates/angers me just thinking about it?)

1. People who cling onto their beliefs and values in the face of overwhelming evidence and reason that contradicts them; being illogical. This is mostly to do with politics, and people who hold onto their ideologies out of some perceived moral superiority instead of what has actually been demonstrated to create the best possible results within human societies, but can apply to a variety of other things too where people prioritize their own personal ideas and values over what is actually true and provable. This is genuinely infuriating and the reason I've given up on arguing with people online; it's better for my mental health to simply disengage and focus on the things that I actually like. Equally, I cannot lie to myself if I know something isn't true, and care a great deal about pursuing the best possible outcome (e.g. "If this isn't the best course of action, why would we pursue it?")
2. Things being disorganized or overcomplicated. I'm the sort of person who prefers things to be orderly, easy to understand, and easy to follow. While I'm not someone who is good at maintaining a routine (outside of work anyway), I am not chaotic and am often annoyed by people who are. Prefer things to be quiet, smooth and orderly. This also applies heavily to sensory things; prefer things to be neat and visually stimulating.
3. Having things I care about be ruined or tainted. If something leaves a strong impression on me, I tend to put a lot of value on it as a part of my life. Something that can become an anchor of comfort and familiarity to me in a sea of otherwise fluctuating interests. So if I learn something that ruins it for me (e.g. say the creator of something I enjoy is outed for something terrible), that leaves a dark mark on things for me and I'll completely cut it out of my life, even if it hurts to do so, because now that dark cloud will forever loom over it; can't engage with it without thinking about it.
4. Already mentioned earlier, but I have an issue with authority and not being in control of my own life. I will fight back and resist if someone tries to pressure me, or threaten me, into doing something. Physically, if needs be. I'm not a people pleaser by any stretch of the imagination and I'd rather be dead than be stuck in a situation where I have no control over my own life.
5. I also have a problem with people who are rude and can't control their emotions in public. Reflecting back on some of the things I've said, I want it to be clear that while I'm a hardcore loner and feel no connection to most people, I also am always cognizant of treating other people fairly. While I lack connection to others, people often find me to be very understanding and kind, and I'm often confused by how vicious and vindictive some people can become over the smallest of issues.

What do I struggle with?

1. Routine. I am terrible at sticking to any sort of long-term routines. Often get irritable and frustrated if there's nothing capturing my interest at the moment. What I do on a day-to-day basis is rarely thought out beyond, maybe, having a specific thing or two I'd like to do. It's largely unstructured time where I can do whatever I feel like doing at a given moment. Even if I make an effort to try to stick to a routine, I'll reason my way out of it as unnecessarily restrictive. That while it's perfectly reasonable to stick to certain rules, you shouldn't force yourself to live in a way that adversely impacts your happiness.
2. Realization. I will spend countless hours thinking about doing things, but rarely - if ever - follow through. Simple fact that the idea of things are often far more interesting than the actual concrete reality of them. Material reality rarely measures up to one's imagination. More generally, I can have many ideas, and have great difficulty deciding which one I want to do; committing to just one is sometimes very difficult for me. I've also learned over time that it's best to give myself a few days to think things over before immediately jumping into something as well (i.e. something may seem extremely interesting in the moment, but completely forgettable in a couple of days).
3. Following on the previous two points, things rarely have value to me once my interest has been exhausted. As soon as I've explored every part of something, it's exceedingly rare for me to have any interest in coming back to it unless it leaves a serious impression on me. Things that don't leave that strong impression are quickly discarded and forgotten.
4. Emotional connections. I've said before that I don't think I've ever felt "love" for anyone. Family, friends, romantic or sexual partners, etc. I've never felt an unconditional attachment to anyone. So I feel no real emotional connections to other people. I also really have no interest in developing such connections either. Will also note that I tend to be possessive when it comes to my partners, which is something I'm open about. So I don't feel love for others, but I do care about them being "mine". I don't admit to that often, but I feel it's a notable point about my personality.
5. Following up on the previous point, I'd say there's no real desire to be "loved" as much as I want to be seen as "the best" at what I do. I am very competitive when it comes to things I choose to involve myself with. There's an idea that "no one is better than me"; "most you can be is an equal". Though, again, I know from experience now that the idea of being the best is better than the actual reality of it. Which also gives me doubts about the actual value of following any other higher aspirations I might have now when I've already known I can be happy (and have been happier) without all of that.
6. I will spend literal days optimizing things that interest me. I will obsess over things, never letting them go until I'm completely satisfied with the result. Exploring new ideas, testing, re-evaluating, trying new angles or concepts, seeing what works the best for me and/or what the optimal solution to a given problem is based on what I've seen. I tend to hit things again, and again, and again until I get the result I want, or as close to it as possible.

What do you think?

Been working on this recently as I've been re-evaluating my own type. Just an assortment of basic questions that might help you look at yourself more objectively:

1. What are you good at?
2. What do you like doing day-to-day?
3. What do you struggle with?
4. What upsets/irritates/angers you?
5. Any specific traits or quirks that you think are worth noting? Why?

Still working on developing this, and answering them myself, but I've found that it has helped me a lot with being more honest with myself. Admitting to my own struggles and such.

Curious to see how all of you compare/contrast these two.

How would you know for certain which one you use?

Would love to hear some practical examples or day-to-day experiences of either.

Have a few triads I'm considering, wanted to get your thoughts based on these points:

• I am image conscious. I almost always think about how other people might perceive me based on the way I dress, how I speak, the way I look, the sort of food that I eat, the things I enjoy for entertainment, the music I like, etc. I don't follow what's popular, but rather try to line up with a certain idea of how I am (or would like to be). Despite this, I often try to tell myself to simply be proud of who I am, and that I don't have to fit some idealized mold in my head of how I want to be, and feeling a sense of guilt/unease/frustration when I fail to live up to that mold. This is virtually a constant, everyday thing.
• Since I was young, I've often had an idealized image of the kind of life I'd like to have. I remember, as a teenager, dreaming of being super rich and living a life of otherworldly luxury. Then, realizing I didn't need all of that, I dreamed of living a more self-sufficient lifestyle in the woods in my early twenties. Nowadays I'm somewhere in the middle, wanting a nice cabin in the woods away from everything without making my life more difficult than it needs to be.
• The previous bullet also applies to the fact that I'd also often dream about what it would be like to have any number of career paths I could've taken. Mathematics, Theoretical Physics, Acting, History, Psychiatry, Writing, a Legal Career, and so on. Having some romanticized idea in my head of what that life would be like without considering the day-to-day responsibilities of it. Life experiences made me reconsider what I actually liked doing in my day-to-day life, and using that to direct what path I should take, rather than chasing *the idea* of something.

Just looking for a general idea here.

Just something I've noticed as I've aged.

When I was in my younger years and especially when I was a teenager, I was very materialistic. Example I'd like to use here is that I've collected films and games ever since I was a little kid. Not as many as I would've liked, but at my peak I think I had over five hundred movies and at least a hundred physical copies of various video games.

I'd spend many hours in my teenage years scouring the internet for the rarest and most obscure films I could find to see if they were any good, and trying to find copies if I could. There are some films where I swear I may have one of the only physical copies in existence (where I could genuinely only find one copy online across the entire internet, mostly indie films that had very limited releases).

So there was a dual desire to both have a huge collection of the best movies, and also having some rare and obscure films for the sheer novelty of them being movies most people have never heard of. Being relentlessly curious about discovering films and games I'd never seen or heard of. Though I rarely, if ever, kept up with what was actually new at the time.

However, as I've gotten older, approaching thirty at this stage, I've grown to value individual films and games a lot more. I've donated or sold large sections of my collection because, being honest with myself, a lot of them are films/games I'm not going to get much use out of. They were just taking up space and had no real long-term value to me anymore.

But the films and games I've kept (and the ones I'd still like to add to my collection) are the ones that are really special to me on a purely personal level. Films and games I can see myself continuing to watch and play long into the future, and have watched and played them several times in the past.

I think you could also see this with how I played video games as a teenager, and how I play them now. When I was younger I'd 100% them for the sake of it. Just wanting to do absolutely everything sheerly to say I'd done everything. Making it a point to complete every game in my collection. But nowadays I focus more on my own personal enjoyment of the game, and don't feel that desire to do absolutely everything unless I genuinely love the game that much.

So when I was younger I'd collect things for the sake of getting as many as I could. Being focused entirely on getting them and owning them for its own sake, perhaps if only to show off to others. But as I've gotten older and had more life experiences, I've grown to focus in only on the things that I really care about and love on a personal level.

And - when it comes to the ones I do care about, I care a lot about getting the best versions of them instead of simply owning a copy for its own sake. So I might seek out the Collector's Edition of a game or movie, or at least get a 4K Release of a film I love. I know for some I'm actively just waiting for a Special Edition or 4K Release to come out one day.

Still, I've always had that relentless curiosity to see new and interesting things. Every day I'm always looking for something that captures my interest and genuinely gets my attention. Any time some new franchise or film or game captures my interest, I'll spend hours - if not days or even weeks - pouring over all the information I can find about them.

So anything that does capture my genuine interest is something I will obsess over for a limited period of time until my interest is exhausted and I'll move onto something else, or revolve back around to one of my old interests that I still love. It's rare that I truly stick with something long-term, but those that I do are the ones that have really left a serious impression on me.

Just wondering if this development/evolution of my behavior and focus over time could be reflected with certain functions.