u/WhyYesIAmANerd_

I was on my phone in the bathroom with the volume on the next to lowest setting and my neighbors started pounding on the floor right below my feet 💀 like I wasn't even being loud or doing jumping jacks or something, I've barely talked to them but they make way more noise than me and have kids and leave trash on the stairs but I've never said anything to them about it so i don't think they'd have a grudge or something

Basically what the title says, it actually had been in my city on the 24th then jumped to an entirly different state the 25th and hasn't moved or been updated since. I filled out the search request but I haven't heard anything back yet, is there anything else I can do? It was originally supposed to be delivered on the 24th :(

Mostly just for food and laundry money

Disclaimer, this is not intended to fear monger or imply you should never come out at all. It's simply some things you should consider before coming out to someone you live with, such as a parent or guardian. I'm speaking from my own experiences and to what I'd have prepared if I had the time. This will mention abuse and transphobia.

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I've seen many people over the years make posts that are titled “How should I come out?" Or something similar, but then go on to add they're not sure how their parents will react or even that they're expecting a negative reaction. This is something that's bothered me for a while, because I've seen how it can go negatively first hand. This has helped me make a mental list of steps of things I should have done differently, and I thought I'd share my knowledge with those who might be in the same boat. This list is not exhaustive, and won't cover how to actually come out in a conversation; it'll mostly cover things you need to think of beforehand.

1. Test the waters first.

>Depending on how vocal your parents are about politics, you might not need this step. How do your parents talk about trans people? Have you seen them only say negative or transphobic things? Have they even mentioned them at all? Have they said anything similar to “Oh I support them but I wouldn't want my child to be trans.” Have they said homophobic things before? Are they openly right winged political wise? Depending on your answers, this could be all you need to know about whether or not it's safe to come out.

2. Have a plan.

>If your answers were mixed on the previous point and you still want to try to come out, you need to have a plan in place. Try to talk to supportive friends or family (that are outside of your household) in case things go south, or look up local programs for queer youth. (For those who are older that are between 18-25, in some places you're still considered ‘youth’ and there may be programs directed for your age range, that's what helped me.) Some things to think about for this step: Do I have any important documents? (If not, in the USA you can order them if you have at least some sort of identification) Am I prepared mentally for this to possibly go wrong and for me to lose my housing? What will I do if things turn violent? If you have a job, are you prepared to support yourself? Do you have any money saved up that you could rely on in an emergency? Do you have enough meds (if you take any) to last long enough till you can refill your prescription?

3. Things to do before you tell them

>Have a bag of necessities ready to go, hidden in your car or room or at a friends house

>Tell a trusted person what you're about to do in case things turn for the worse

>Understand that no matter their reaction you are valid, and you are your number one priority not their opinion of you.

>If your state or country is a one party recording state, record the conversation

In conclusion, a lot of the time there's this pressure I've seen both from outside people in the queer community and from people to themselves to come out, to be proud of your identity. This isn't entirely a bad idea, and you shouldn't be ashamed to be trans at all, but safety should be your priority, not pride, especially in this current political environment. This isn't an anti-coming out campaign at all, this is me trying to keep people alive and safe. No matter what you choose to do, please do it carefully and again, stay safe.

I used to not get any notifications from them in a server but now I've started to get them again even though I ignored them and haven't unignored them, I'm unsure if this is a bug or a feature they've changed. Anyone else experience this? (I can't block them because they'd immediately notice and start drama with my friend, they're irl aquentances)

For context this is the latest version on android if that helps