u/alaskawolfjoe

I need one copied this weekend. Cannot wait for codes next week.

You can DM me any suggestions.

I knew this could happen but I did not think it would.

I just got asked to PNP by someone I like. Never knew he did it. It was very late, so I was on my own with this.

On another night, I might not be able to resist. But for tonight at least I said no.

I was worried that I might seek out drugs. But now it was offered.

The sick thought I had was that no one takes me seriously when I say I struggle because I have so much clean time. I thought if I used and went back to day one, everyone (and myself) might take my struggling more seriously.

But I am good for today. One day at a time.

I started reaching out to people about my struggle. This was hard because my first 15 years in the program I was told not to do this.

Two people I told were discouraging. I explicitly said I would probably relapse.

But I tried again and two people were kind and helpful. They offered their phone numbers.

This was so unexpected. So different than anything I experienced before in the program.

I am still scared that I will relapse after a decade clean. But this shocked me (in a good way).

i’ve got nine years. Afraid of gonna throw it away. No clue how to stop myself. I know I’m supposed to get professional help for this, But i don’t know what to do in the meantime

I asked someone after meeting today what I should do. He said I was supposed to use my support network. But my support network doesn’t understand addiction, so all I’m getting into is caused them to stress. So here I am on Reddit.

It is standard to wish someone good luck when they say they are struggling or feel close to relapse.

I think it might be better to tell someone you think they can pull through. Or maybe offer to talk to them. Or anything.

Years ago, I spoke during burning desire and a few minutes later as people left they all said good luck. It left me feeling alone and hopeless. Within five minutes of getting home I called a dealer.

Last night someone had a burning desire. I did not know what to say, so I said nothing.

I hope they got through. I feel bad that I did nothing to help.

I have 9 years clean but in the dozen or so years before then, working on the first two steps either led to relapse or close to it.

Did anyone else find those steps to be relapse traps? The steps from 6 on were part of my life before I even became an addict, so I am guessing they would be easier. But I never got past working one and two without relapse.

Also, any suggestions for getting through them are welcome (since I may try to do the steps again).

How often do you go to meetings and feel that recovery is not possible for you?

I went to a meeting yesterday and there was a list of things you have to do to recover. I have not used in about a decade but lately have gotten urges. But they made me feel like that is just how it will always be.

There was a list of things to do to avoid relapse.
First was change things in your life from the things that you think contribute to relapse. I am not sure how you do that with family and work. You

Next was to tell people about your urges. I have in the past had friends I shared my urges with. But at this point, I feel it is so hard for them to hear that I do not want to talk about this with them

I felt when I left like it is just a matter of time till I relapse. Intellectually I know that is unlikely, but the meeting made me feel so discouraged.

How does your department decide which students to accept as majors? Is it interview? Portfolio? Transcript?

Part of the campy appeal is the repeated tropes.

What are your favorites? Here are some of mine:

--"smoke show"

--"You shouldn't judge someone till you get to know them."

--"a big misunderstanding"

--"the biggest [blank} in town"

--Bigoted plane passengers

--Accusations of theft

What are the lines and ideas you wait for in every Dhar Mann video?

My C drive is so full that my computer is almost unusable. (Yes, I have deleted downloads, temp filed, etc.)

I have uninstalled a few programs and reinstalled on my D drive.

But some programs automatically save to the C-drive. I cannot reinstall them because they cannot be downloaded again with my C-drive so full.

What can I do?

This year I had two students who are brilliant but fell behind. I told each of them that they could make up a few short paper assignments reflecting on class events/activities by combining them into one paper looking at the period overall.

In the fall semester, one student sent me an audio recording of an hour in length. This semester a student sent me a half hour long video.

Why do they think video and audio is acceptable now?

Recently, I got an email from a woman who wanted to talk to me about the challenges of having a professional career and an academic one.

I asked if she was asking as potential student, writng an article, thinking of going into the profession or teaching herself or what? She said she was just interested,

She said she will be in my area and would like to meet. She asked if we could continue our conversation on social media. I told her that that email is best.

She suggested whatsapp.

I was not about to give her my phone info. That is when I cut this off.

Any idea what her game was?