u/baconburger2022

This is an out of character announcement.

In the coming weeks, the Public Furnace News Network will be transforming from pure text based, to audio. Like a real radio station.

You will be hearing my voice acting of my own set of characters, and my attempts at what your furnace sounds like.

These will be on YouTube. Never done something like this before, but it should be fun no matter what.

Until next Monday, when we get some real answers about how this world works and an update to the wiki. (If you want to make additions to the wiki, feel free to add them. No need to ask me.)

GOOOOOOOOD MORNING FURNACES!

Hey this is not a test, this is the news! Brought to you by Rustolium! "Dont drink it, its drain cleaner."

Out top story tonight, the sudden disappearance of President Shrub has caused panic and rage in the South Eastern regions as tensions skyrocket to a breaking point, nobody knows what happened to him, nobody know how it happened or who to blame. But get this folks, they will blame each other anyway, and we may have a war on our hands!

Anyway, while they sort that out, our next story comes from Quarrytown in Australium, where they are celebrating the 45th anniversary of the bit that they all live in. We hope they enjoy the festivities, and hopefully solve their mold problem in the coming days.

We now divert our attention to the South South South Dakota border! a band of Reavers has begun a siege of the eastern border, doing all kinds of damage! If this wasnt the radio, id show some of that footage, but here is an audio clip from the scene!

(a mix of gunfire, war shouts, and alarms plays for a few seconds before being cut off)

Wow! what a fight that is, and i hope we get to interview the victors at some point!

This has been your host (static) Tune in next time when we talk about oil!

(after a brief bit of static, the radio returns to your normal programming)

Goooooood morning furnaces, and welcome back!

I have a special guest tonight, who may be here against his will, but you know him, you might hate him, you may love him, who cares. All i know is he’s known for rigging elections and genocide, the one, the only, President Shrub!

(You can hear muffled cries in the background)

Now now, president Shrub theres no need to call for help. But i have some questions for you since you dropped by. SO, lets take off that gag and restore your voice! Now whats a politician without a voice? Am i right audience?

(Pre recorded laugh track plays)

Take! It! Off!

(Pre recorded crowd cheering plays, covering up the ungagging of the president)

So! Question one for you Mr president. What is it like knowing that you killed multiple million people as a lash out for both being in a bad mood at the time, and reading New Emberfall’s rejection to supplying Furnacium to your country?

The president screamed “get me out of here! You will not be given mercy for this act of terrorism! The freezer nation is eternal! We will find you and we”-

(The president was suddenly cut off by more muffling)

Uh Oh folks, seems like our special guest here needs some encouragement! Why does that mean?

(AMP! IT! UP!)

Dont worry mr president, the mic doesnt bite, but get the feeling your screams will make for an excellent broadcast!

(Suddenly static intensified until you could no longer hear the screams of Freezer president Bush in the background. Then silence. You all look at one another as the radio sat with quiet static for 10 more minutes until regular programming returned 10 minutes later.)

Back in action, the next broadcast will arrive on schedule.

Gooooood morning furnaces!

Last week’s body count was a new best of 25! 4 out of the coald mines, where survivors of the freezer attack have been staving off the enemy! Meanwhile in new Florida, air conditioners have been fighting off mosquitoes the size of airplanes, and only one air conditioner was killed. I know the City of Fans is not called new florida, but seriously look at it.

Because reading the rest of those deaths were accidental, im not going to address it. And instead pivot to a segment im gonna call

You know what boils my oil?

And the topic of this week is: you know what boils my oil folks? How the world government has done nothing yet to combat the freezers. Its almost like they dont even exist.

Oh, thats right! THEY DONT! Ahahahahahaaa!! Seriously listeners, since the great revolution all those years ago, which reshaped how life works here on this depressing little planet, and gave us great new gifts such as, The Rust, the farlands, and yours truly, just to name a few. You think the world military council still exists to protect us? In your dreams buster bins, wake up from your dream, grow some lug nuts and unite the countries! This is the best time as any to do so!

Oh wait, im being told by my producer that im not allowed to incite riots and revolutions. Tooooo baaaddd….

Well that wraps up our section of Boil my Oil, and now to the economic desk! Phill! Wake up buddy you’re on the air!

(Brief bit of slight static.)

Oh yeah, Phill’s dead. Welp, while i go and get another sacra- (laugh track) oh come on listeners, nobody believes in sacrifices anymore. While i go and get another market analyst, that wraps up today’s broadcast.

See you next week, when we talk about police brutality and its impact on homelessness in the wasteland!

(News jingle plays, before returning to your channel.)

Yes i am lazy, no i have no drawing skills on computers.

So, i wanted to ask before i started prompt engineering for some AI model.

Goooooooood morning furnaces! Its a beautiful day in god’s great country. Yesterday’s bodycount from the war chalked up to be a solid 3,000. Battle of Anvil’s Hammer, 254 dead anvils! And 122 furnace casualties in what the global military calls a “massive victory against the striking tide.”

Over in the northern front, clashes continue between ore miners and the freezers! But this story beings a sad note to the broadcast as the death toll from these gang wars has exceeded 1,600 furnace casualties, and only about 50 freezer casualties.

Meanwhile in South South South Dakota, riots continue as the mayor proceeded to divert 80% of the City’s food supply to the military and the royal family. The riots proceeding this notice created death tolls as high as 974. As the largest city/state on the planet has one of its bloodiest days this year.

We all wish them good riddance with their efforts.

Join us next time, as we get some sponsors and improve the quality of our broadcasts!

Hello furnaces.

Im gonna be honest, i forgot what was going on and where this was all going in frozen fire series, so, i figured, i can restart the furnace story. From the very top.

Ill be making news stories every week. This will set the stage and give some framework as to how stuff is going, and will give you loads of space to hop in however you’d like.

Feel free to use your old characters or make new ones. I wont reference old seasons, but you can make your characters lore however you’d like.

Ill start maintaining the (abandoned) wiki page again to the best of my ability.

So, this is going to be more of an uneven technology kind of world. Some countries (that i dont know names of) will be modern, others will be steampunk, some may be dieselpunk, you may have a solarpunk area, and interspace travel is allowed. I have some classes of threats out there that ill toss in when things get boring.

Tomorrow the first news story will be published. I can answer questions in the comments, and yes we will be needing a new map. I’ll probably figure something out.

You were awesome. Never change man.

We still exist!

Im still here at least.

Feeling nostalgic about the past, and was wondering if people still remember the past, what happened, what was gonna happen before we all became busy.

(About 200 of you are out there viewing my content, so i figured id ask.)

Ready set go.

A World Stitched Together is a free flow draft zero project i have been casually working on. It features the country Navaria, a super high tech security and surveillance state, operated by the Falcon AI, who basically runs the country and operates the infrastructure.

During a major event, a blast happens due to a demonstration malfunction, and it picks up Navaria, the whole country and drops it into modern day Earth.

Falcon, Navaria, and the rest of the world will have to figure out how to liberate together, now that a civilization thousands and thousands of years ahead in technology has just instantly appeared out in the ocean overnight.

All sorts of complications and dramatic events take place that will put everyone to the test, and we may just see the cards everyone keeps behind their backs.

Again, its not finished, i think we are on chapter 8? Still working on it every now and then though.

So thats really it.