u/crunchyazuritefins

Growing up i had a rough childhood, and was isolated by everyone. I would have random hobbies to cope, but watching myself get hurt by everyone around me and get nosebleeds makes me feel joy. As i got older and wiser with technology, This peaks my curiosity even more.

When i got my first phone on pandemic, i would browse random sites and apps just to past time. I then randomly clicked on a g-re site and was addicted to it. It felt like joy, but at the same time—pity and shame. Overtime, i would get headaches from the nightmares of it. I just stopped doing it.

2 years later, i relapsed. I felt the mixed feelings rushing through my brain again. But instead of just nightmares and headaches, my mental health deteriorated. and that's when i realized i needed to stop. Im 3 years clean now and i never felt better.

For context, i have my classmates with different religions. In our whole section, i was the only one who is a Buddhist. I usually start my day with a prayer and meditation and do everything i need to do. I did that on the 3rd week of first month of school and i started to notice na they were mocking me. I am not paranoid, but they were actually imitating on how i pray and how i meditate. This has been going on for months until i snapped at them and nagreklamo ako sa adviser ko. Pinagalitan niya, yes. But did it stopped? No. They just kept on backstabbing me. Hindi ko na sila sinumbong pa kasi i feel numb, or i think i just dont care anymore. I regret it na kasi i realized i have been suppressing my emotions again and now i am very sick.

Dear sisters and brothers, please help me with this one.

This has been going on for months at school and it has been getting on my nerves. They kept mocking me for how i pray and just me being the only Buddhist in class. I live in a mass-Catholic country and my class is full of Catholics except for me. We are 38 in total and i cant handle 37 people mocking me and shunning me out just for being me. It makes me struggle with my faith and with my mental health.

For context, im a teen in trouble rn. I was heavily abused (in all kinds) since i was a toddler by my parents, primarly my dad. I can remember every of them but i chose not to because it hurts soooo much. I barely got freedom to speak, or write down my thoughts, or else they will basically shun me out of my relatives or just blackmail me that no one will believe me and will tell me that we have relatives with connection to the police and the government itself.

Last year, i already got the courage to report them to the police. I reported my parents that my dad has been touching me. I cant fully explain everything because i feel so overwhelmed and also i chose not to tell something because they were not paying attention to me. They only contacted my parents and asked them if it was true but they lied.