u/depressedgrey6

So, please forgive me if this is a stupid question, this is my first experience with pre-docs.

So, I applied for a pre-doc a few weeks ago, and all they initially asked for was a cover letter and resume. Then the hiring manager reached out and asked for references, a transcript, and GRE scores. I'm wondering if this means I'm officially in the running for the position. The reason why I ask is that there's another pre-doc in the same school that asks for a reference page and transcripts in the application itself, so I'm assuming this is like a pre-interview thing to see if I'm worth their time to interview. So, any insight would be helpful!

So, I'm someone with daddy issues cuz tho my dad isn't a bad person he isn't the most emotionally available person in the world, if u get what I mean. So naturally this has led me to have a weird relationship with men (not in a sexual way but in a perception type of way) and male attention.

I'm currently in a master's program, everything is going well for the most part but there's this guy. Is he necessarily the most attractive? No. It's more he was nice to me at a team bonding event and my brain simply couldn't handle it. I've gotten over my initial feelings over him (cuz logically i knew that nothing would ever happen) and now I just text him whenever I want but it's like I feel so pathetic sometimes cuz I'm like though the bar is low for some men, this is the most basic shit.

So, I didn't get the internship I wanted, and was I sad, yes? But u know it is what it is. Then I got an offer to be a grader for a class, yay! Now shit might not happen cuz the appointment might be fucked. My manager's gf might be looking for an intern, and I was going to know by Monday night, yay! Her boss was fucking late, and now I might not even know anything this week, cuz who knows if they can meet again this week or not.

I am so unbelievably done. It's one thing if these opportunities never existed, but this is just cruel. The grad program hasn't even actually started and I'm already dealing with exhaustion. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK. I just want something to work out, anything man, anything.

Hi! So, I'm a grad student who got offered a really cool RA position; unfortunately, it is unpaid. I was wondering: does anyone know if the university offers a possible stipend for this type of situation, by the university like I mean anywhere in the university (schools, departments, etc). I'm not talking about the traditional way where the department pays for part of your tuition or something like that (the PI and I are in two different schools), but I'd love to at least get somewhat compensated for my work, even if it's just a little bit of money.

So today is my bday. I think like a lot of people I personally don't like this day (especially as a child who was basically told they were a burden their whole life), having a day that's "all about you" ain't fun. I do have a fun mahjong night planned with my friends in a few weeks (two of them are still in Jersey and won't be back till school starts) so as you can imagine, today is all abt formalities for me.

Thankfully when I told my parents I didn't want to go out and do anything they respected that (mostly cuz I went to Chipotle and just hung out with my co-workers for two hours), but I directly told my brother not to buy a cake and low and behold he buys a cake. I was respectful abt it too. Yeah you could argue that "oh it's a sign of celebration and love" but truthfully it would've been a lot nicer if they had respected my wishes. Thank tf I have an interview tomorrow cuz it's making the day go by a lot quicker.

Also random side tangent abt my brother that has nothing to do with the shit above. I love how this bitch decides to "apologize" to me two weeks later after he explicitly didn't help me try to catch the dog after our dog ran out and said "I'm sorry.... that's all I'll say" like I was fucking at fault??? It wasn't even him actually apologizing, it was my mom basically telling him too. This is why I'm very grateful I have my friends, co-workers, and professor's cuz all this immaturity is honestly so old.

Like old me would've been sad but I'm honestly over everything and have officially blocked both my brother and mom.

Idk his moods are low key depressive episodes, but it's not like I can bring this up to him cuz you know asian immigrant father.

Like I literally just told him that I don't want to do anything for my bday tomorrow cuz his mood was just going to fuck it up, and for some reason he's like "I never offered or said anything?" like bitch do we have amnesia??? Though I am having friends over in a few weeks for a soju and mahjong night. Ik I sound like a heartless bitch but I'm too the point where I'm fresh out of sympathy and fucks to give.

They know therapy is readily available but refuse to go. Thankfully I'm moving into my apartment this Sunday, so over all their bs.

Basic background: final interview at an economic development consulting company, it's 60 minutes and she said a good portion of the interview will be scenarios (basically give me smth similar to the questions they get from their clients to see how I think), she has also provided two scenarios in the email to help me practice, this would be for an internship by the way.

I guess, beyond what I just said, what else should I expect/how should I prepare? I am going to prepare the most standard behavioral questions like "how do you handle conflict" "strengths/weaknesses" and so forth just in case she asks, I'm also going to keep practicing scenarios as there will be an impromptu scenario brought up, but is there anything else I should do?

Because it's me and maybe 2 other people (she said for the final interview they'd only be choosing 2-3 people to do the final interview) so I want to give myself the best chance possible. Any advice would help!

Basic background: final interview at an economic development consulting company, it's 60 minutes and she said a good portion of the interview will be scenarios (basically give me smth similar to the questions they get from their clients to see how I think), she has also provided two scenarios in the email to help me practice, this would be for an internship by the way.

I guess, beyond what I just said, what else should I expect/how should I prepare? I am going to prepare the most standard behavioral questions like "how do you handle conflict" "strengths/weaknesses" and so forth just in case she asks, I'm also going to keep practicing scenarios as there will be an impromptu scenario brought up, but is there anything else I should do?

Because it's me and maybe 2 other people (she said for the final interview they'd only be choosing 2-3 people to do the final interview) so I want to give myself the best chance possible. Any advice would help!

Backstory: basically, my mother asked if I want to go back to China, first reaction answer was no cuz she's a toxic bitch and her family ain't much better but then I had hesitancy cuz it's a free trip to asia and I love asia.

So I was upfront with my mom today and told her how her family is fucking toxic (a bit tamer in wording but same idea) and a whirlwind of excuses came out (in her eyes, was trying to convince me to go), saying things like

- "oh your cousin acts like that bc he's spoiled by your aunt" -> basic context is that he was taking an english proficiency test at the US Embassy to get a student visa so I offered to just go out into the city and hang with him to help him practice, needless to say he didn't take it very seriously. My mom was a two-faced bitch who tried to comfort my cousin rather than calling him out for his bs. I called her out basically saying "so that excuses his actions?"

- "oh your grandma is old, sometimes they just say whatever they want, they don't know any better" -> in which I proceeded to tell her that the reason why she doesn't "know better" is because all of her family never calls them out for anything (aka a flaw in chinese culture), and also the fact that life is a series of choices and she chooses to stay ignorant

and then she starts talking about the time where I blocked her for 3 months in which she asked me "what can I do better" and I told her "go to therapy" and she said "no, the videos on wechat talk about therapy and I don't want to spend the money". Then she told me to call her out in the future if she does stupid shit (which I did many, many times in the past). I just said "nah, learn to keep yourself accountable I'm fucking tired" -> don't get me wrong I am very willing to call people out for their issues. Still, only if they are capable of changing, I called her out so many times throughout the years and it was just excuse after excuse, it's too little too late, bitch isn't worth my energy, unless there is a fundamental change from her.

The only thing I agreed with her is that their way of showing care is by talking about each other's parenting decisions, cuz they got nothing else to talk about.

It was incredible how she made every single wrong decision in that moment, not to mention she's gotten suspiciously nicer after I told her no (and bought all my favorite grocceries). I've decided that I'm prob either going to Boston with a friend or solo travel to philly or d.c for a few days (cuz I love the NE and I think it would be good practice solo traveling)

So, for some basic context, my AM and I have had a very tumultuous relationship (aka she is a deeply traumatized Chinese woman). I call her out for all her abusive bullshit, which culminated in her throwing a tantrum and me not speaking to her for three months (feb - may) , so now it's obviously July, and though we live together (I will be moving out in two weeks for school), we don't really speak. Still, she is offering to take me back to China with her to both visit family and go to a province in China, which I said no to.

So, my question is, am I wrong for not wanting to go with her? The first reason why I said no is that I really don't like her side of the family. Besides my first uncle (directly translating this from Chinese, btw, in Chinese it's 大舅 by the way), they are all toxic af, I'm talking like constant shit-talking each other and criticizing each other's parenting choices. Like last year, when I went, I had a rift with my cousin, and my mom took my cousin's side and tried to calm down my aunt (who is her twin sister) rather than taking my side. The second reason is that I don't particularly want to be around her for two weeks alone. If I'm going to be honest, I don't have a desire to have a relationship with her either, because she's just so fucking negative.

So, I know this all seems like "okay, no-brainer," but the reason for the hesitancy is I think what a lot of us have dealt with, like the immigrant child guilt. Also, it's like my grandparents aren't getting any younger but I honestly can't stand my grandma (she's like my mom on steroids) Should I give my mother another chance? Idk basically what would you do if you were me.

So, I saw a job posting for Phipps Conservatory, which led to a Reddit rabbit hole basically saying the place sucks. I don't remember how old the post is, so I thought I'd ask again. To anyone who works/worked there, is the place as horrible as Reddit makes it out to be?

I'd be working part-time, by the way. Thank you in advance!

So idk if this is just unique to my AM but I thought I'd ask. Long story short my mother was physically there but never emotionally (like half for reasons out of her control, such as having a very long commute every day and half for reasons she can control, like she just didn't give a fuck), and to put it simply she never taught me any life skills, only what not to do in life.

Fast forward to now (about to be 21) and I've since acquired basic life skills: things like attention to detail, cleaning after myself, how to speak without sounding like a tiny little mouse, and so forth, all from my job at Chipotle. I guess one thing I've struggled with is how it's quite obvious that my AM feels zero shame for not teaching me things like this. She's like "wow your time at Chipotle has really helped you" and I want to be like "WHY DIDN'T YOU DO ANYTHING". Like for Christmas last year I basically cleaned up my parents house because shit was disgusting and I saw rice dumped everywhere and it was just a hot mess and she felt no shame.

So my question is, is this unique to my mother or have y'all experienced this? I just find it frustrating that someone who literally chose to be a mother decided that once she had me and my brother and that we got to elementary school age she really just didn't give a fuck anymore.

Hello!

So, an incoming master's student at Pitt who is very interested in policy-related work (for basic background).

I was scrolling through Handshake and came upon Project 26 and their job posting for a Pitt voter registration fellow. I used to know someone who was a part of it, and the general vibe I got was that it was quite messy, to say the least, but that was back in 2024. I was wondering, could anyone give me insight on how it is now? I also can't ask that same person as we haven't spoken in months and I have no way to contact them.

Also, when I say messy, I mean the management wasn't the greatest.

This is the type of job (I know it's only for the fall) I am looking for, but I don't want to give myself more stress if the job isn't worth it. Thanks in advance!

*I don't want opinions on this situation; it's been ongoing. I just need to talk to the void so I don't send this individual a nasty message*

So what I struggle to understand is that for the time we were friends (which was 3 years) we always preached that we will be better than our parents (our parents are all immigrants by the way), that we'll be emotionally mature, talk things out and so forth and then you block me on everything after I tell you to quit complaining to me if you're not going to take a singular piece of advice I have? I understand that my way of communication was very very flawed but as someone who went through similar situations to me I thought you would be a bit more sympathetic? That little old me thought that our friendship would be worth fighting for, at the very least talking things out?

Little old me was clearly very very wrong. What I struggle to understand is just blocking me completely (even on LinkedIn which is insane to me), you are someone who is full of shit and clearly you did me a great favor by cutting me off. Get the help you so clearly need, and for the record, I'm glad you didn't get that internship, or any internship for a matter of fact.

i swear to god my period is what is speeding up this burn out for fucking real. I’m fucking sick of the complaining. I’m fucking sick of the Chinese going back and forth. i‘m fucking sick of working all the damn time. I just want my period to come and I’ll feel so much better fr. FUCK

I know this is because of trauma, but does anyone else have an AM with zero social skills? Every time I'm talking to my dad, she butts in. I understand that it's from her past trauma (trust me, she gave me the same habit because #generationaltrauma), but holy shit, I'm over it.

I literally blew up at her to stop because she was pissing me off and I straight up told her that "no one was speaking to her". I understand it's from a place of wanting to help but if I wanted her help I'd ask. This is why I keep her number blocked on my phone from when I didn't speak to her.

*I do want to mention that I am capable of sympathy but this is a habit I've also worked on myself through self awareness and therapy and have since mitigated*

Hi!

So, I'm a senior and a friend of mine who works there told me about how the operations program had 8 open spots, I applied did the final interview (this friday) and I'm now waiting). I know they recruit a lot from both Pitt and CMU so I wanted to ask, has anyone who applied like on 4/20 or after get a response yet about the status of their application?

*PSA: I'm about to get my period so incredibly hormonal and very agitated*

So basically, I got a final day interview last friday, on that Tuesday the recruiter tells me "oh, I pride myself on being very fast and giving everybody feedback the week after" I KNOW IT'S ONLY WEDNESDAY BUT WHAT IS TAKING SO LONG. HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO DECIDE IF YOU LIKE SOMEONE OR NOT. I JUST WANT TO KNOW SO I CAN PLAN OUT MY SUMMER PROPERLY ALRIGHT.

I'm also extremely agitated with my professor because he's the only one giving a final out of all the professors teaching capstones. FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK I want to go home.