u/destria

For context, we have a 2 year old and so far, we've not had any incidents of staining or spills or any mess that we couldn't clean. We did baby led weaning and that was messy but we have hard floors, a washable wall behind his high chair and our dining room has been left relatively unscathed. Any messy play stuff like markers and paint are only available to him under close supervision. He mostly hangs out in his playroom or the garden. When he's been ill, we've put down loads of waterproof pads and that mostly avoided any stains but the few things that were missed have come out of the carpet easily.

Anyway we're looking to redecorate our living room and I've just ordered a light coloured sofa. Our current sofa is a mustard velvet one but it's managed to stay clean, even when I was bottle feeding baby on it every day. I want to get new carpets soon too and was looking at natural coloured ones. But people around me are kind of eyebrow raising at my design decisions given that we have a young child.

So, am I bring an idiot in thinking that the danger has passed? Are the messy years ahead? Have I just been extraordinarily lucky?

I always hear people say that messy play is beneficial to children but I'm not fully read up on what those benefits are. You hear about it building immune systems (but is that actually true?) or being a great sensory experience (why is that needed?). Are certain types of messy play more beneficial than others e.g outdoors versus indoors, natural materials versus other kinds.

For context I would say I lean into the eco crunchy side of things and love my kid playing outdoors with natural materials. We spend lots of time in the garden and he waters the plants, digs in the soil, plants and harvests vegetables, plays in his mud kitchen, watches our wildlife pond. When we go out for walks, he's always picking up sticks and splashing in puddles. Today I setup a painting station in the garden with non-toxic paints and brushes made from things like dried alliums and twigs, which he loved! I feel like he experiences lots of different textures through these natural materials, from squishy berries to gloopy wet soil to dry and pebbly gravel to crunchy autumn leaves.

But I don't really do things like make slime or oobleck or set up sensory tables or shaving foam or cloud goop. I guess these feel a bit artificial to me. But I'm wondering if my kid is missing out if I avoid these common sensory materials?

So I'm pretty sure this is a self inflicted "issue" because when my toddler was learning to talk, I used to repeat back what he said (sometimes with minor corrections) to help him with pronunciation and clarity. It became a habit and even though he speaks really well now, I find it difficult to break out of the habit.

Well now I think he thinks that's how you're meant to have a conversation. His conversations with people go something like this:

Them: What's your name?

Him: What's your name? My name is John!

Them: Hi John, how old are you?

Him: Hi John how old are you...I am 2 years old!

He also asks himself questions and answers them immediately. So he'll walk around going, "Hm what's that on the tree... It's an apple! That means it's an apple tree!" Again I think he's learnt this from how I used to speak to him because I would narrate everything in that manner.

I'm not sure this is an issue necessarily and I'm not concerned for his development or anything. But I guess he'll just figure it out eventually?

Sharing in case this helps anyone! I've been trying to get my just turned 2 year old to understand the okay to wake light for months now. It's red at night, turns blue in the morning at 7am. I told him things like red means stay in bed, blue means wake up blue skies. But every morning he'd wake up before the light went blue, immediately come to wake me or my husband and wanted to start the day. He'd say things like "no red, wakey time now, change it to blue!" Or he'd just play dumb and point at the obvious red light and say it's blue.

He's in a cot with the side off and his room is totally child proofed. So I'm happy for him to wake up whenever and play independently, I just wanted to not have to start my day that early!

Well my husband was away this week and I really wanted some sleep, so I tried a different tactic. I told him that the blue light means that's when *mama* is awake. So there's no point in getting me before it turns blue, I will be sleeping. But he can be awake and play in his room if he wants, the light doesn't affect him. First morning, he comes into my bedroom at like 6am, I told him that his light is still red so I am sleeping, go back to your room. And you know what, he did go back to his room, played quietly and then at 7.01am, came running to get me. Next morning, I heard him wake up at around 6am and I saw on the monitor that he was just playing by himself, flicking through books and reading them, listening to his yoto player, getting Magnatiles out to build. He must have been distracted because he didn't even get me until 7.20am!

It's been 5 days now where I am actually able to sleep past 6am because he's happy entertaining himself in his room. I don't get this much independent play with him during the day so it feels like a little miracle.

Who knew that just reframing something could make such a difference!

My just turned 2 year old has been asking to do more cooking/baking recently. He has a kitchen tower, some toddler sized knives, a chopper, peeler, whisk and bowls. He can slice through softer things like bananas, strawberries or tomatoes but struggles with anything harder. He can mix or whisk things, pour pre measured stuff into bowls, sprinkle things, use cookie cutters and obviously pick up stuff with his fingers.

Recently we've made blueberry muffins, banana bread, fruit salad, and courgette and cheese muffins. He loves bringing these to play dates! He helps with our regular meals as well.

So I'm looking for more recipes you've found that are accessible for a toddler to make. Obviously I can help but the more independent/involved he can be, the better! Or alternatively, any other techniques that I could get him to practice?

Our surname is the name of a tree, so for example my toddler is called Jack Birch. We've been teaching him to identify trees because he kept asking and he can definitely identify a birch tree along with a few others. Sometimes he hears us using our full names say on the phone or when we've booked a restaurant, so he definitely knows "Birch" is our family name. He's even called me Mama Birch before.

Well today he was asked what his name was by a friend of mine, and he replied, "I'm Jack Appletree!" I laughed and corrected him, "You mean, Jack Birch." And he goes, "No, no like Birch...I'm Appletree, Mama is Mama Appletree."

Love this confident toddler energy 😂

He's just turned two so the angry screaming tantrums are probably on their way, but for now, he seems to get upset and teary instead when things don't go his way (e.g. banana broken, not allowed to eat dirt, not allowed to throw a rock at the cat, all the classic toddler tragedies).

He will cry and whisper things like, "Oh poor me! Poor me! Sweet bubba ohhhhh". Sometimes he lies on the floor, rocking slightly or he'll sit with his hands on his face. He's pretty quiet throughout, sometimes he does little hiccup sobs if it's really upsetting him, but there's no screaming, no anger, no hitting/throwing or acting out. Just despair and moping.

Generally I can get him out of this funk within a couple of minutes with a cuddle and then a change of activity to distract him.

He can also get this way briefly when something sad happens to a character in a book or if someone else appears sad. He seems quite sensitive to other people getting upset.

I guess I'm wondering, are these still considered tantrums? They just look quite different to what I've seen from other kids' tantrums.

My just turned 2 year old has been steadily getting more and more picky from about 15 months onwards. He ate everything as a baby but didn't have the biggest appetite.

Anyway we've had months of him only eating plain carbs, fruit and occasionally cheese. I kept offering whatever we were eating, plenty of vegetables, but he never touched it. I would put sauce on his pasta and he'd refuse it. If I put it on just some pieces, he'd pick around the saucy pieces and any they had touched.

Well recently he saw a toddler friend eating "red pasta" when we were at a picnic and kept talking about it for days. So I made him pasta with tomato sauce and hidden veg, kept it lightly sauced to start with. Lots of talk about how the red pasta will help his body grow stronger. And lo and behold, he was hesitant at first, but then he started eating the red pasta. Even going, "red pasta is yummy" and "red pasta helps me grow!".

Oh my gosh you guys I could weep from happiness right now! Just need some more peer pressure lmao

We bought a house that had a built in mid sleeper bed in the box room. Our kid is currently 2 years old and sleeping in a cot with the side off, in a bedroom/playroom config. At some point we'd like to move him to the box room and keep the third bedroom as his playroom, it would just give more space if we could move out the cot.

He moves loads in his sleep though and he's often half off the cot! So I worry with a mid sleeper, he'd just roll plain off. I guess I could fit a guard rail initially and maybe put some padding on the floor. He can climb up and down the little ladder now (three wide steps). The mid sleeper is a full size single so he'd have way more room than his cot.

Anyway I wouldn't plan to transition him for at least another year or two, but just wondering when I'd have to think about it. Could he move once he outgrew the cot (age 4?)?

After being with me this whole time, my LO is starting 2 days of preschool in Sept. It's a small setting but has kids from age 2-5 in the same room. Mine turned 2 in June and will likely be one of the youngest ones in the class.

We started potty training in May which is going well and he can independently do all the steps. He uses toilets when we're out and all the different kinds of potty devices so I'm hoping we've covered all bases.

We've been practicing opening and using the lunchbox he'll take and opening/closing his water bottle.

He's very good at tidying up and loves being helpful with chores.

We go to lots of toddler classes and groups so he's no stranger to socializing but obviously these are only for short bursts and with lots of adult support.

What else would you practice? I'm thinking things like:

Putting on and taking off shoes, coat and hat

Asking politely and clearly for help - his language is pretty advanced for a 2 year old, he can speak in full sentences with an extensive vocabulary, but he can be shy about talking to strangers and tends to mumble with them

Using utensils - he's offered them with every meal time and it's probably 50/50 whenever he uses them or his hands, but should I try encouraging him to use them now?

Cutting with safety scissors, pulling lids off pens and putting them on himself, holding crayons/pencils correctly, drawing only on paper

Emotional regulation - he's only just starting to display frustration so we've been working on calming breaths, not throwing etc.

My 2yo didn't want to go to his gymnastics class this morning. He was flopping on the floor and saying he was tired. I said we had to go and he says,

"Call the ambulance! I am TOOOOO TIRED."

Complete with one hand folded over his brow like he was a Victorian damsel who had fainted.

Just had to laugh really.

(We did go to gymnastics, he sprinted around the gym for 20 minutes and did lots of the circuit then told me he had a fun time, of course!)

So my 2 year old has mostly grown out of the super simple board books like "That's not my..." etc. He does let me read him some picture books like Julia Donaldson but doesn't always have the attention span for that length of story. He still enjoys flaps and interactive elements on books.

So I think I'm looking for slightly more story driven board books. We love the Acorn Woods series for example! Any more recommendations along these lines?

We started potty training my 23 month old about a month ago and he's taken to it really quickly with pee. He self initiates, he knows to go before we need to head out anywhere. We've had very few pee accidents and they were mostly all in the first week.

Poo is a different story though. He doesn't seem to recognise when he's going, he will be doing whatever, make a face, poop in his pants and then carry on. Whenever he's had an accident like this, I'll tell him calmly and neutrally that he needs to poo in the potty. I interrupt him from playing and make him watch me clean it all up, clean him up, get him changed etc. But he doesn't really seem bothered by this, he'll go back to whatever afterwards and be fine. If I ask him where does poop go, he'll answer correctly and say "in the potty or toilet" so I think he understands.

So what I've been doing is trying to watch him constantly and if I see any signs (farting, strained face, brief pause in playing like he's concentrating), I put him on the potty. We've caught a lot of poops this way and once he's on the potty, he seems to be happy. He'll even tell me if he's done or if he has more poop to come out. I give plenty of praise for pooping in the potty. So I don't think he's afraid of pooping in the potty.

I don't think he's constipated. His stool is a normal consistency. He poops usually once a day or every other day, so it's regular although a bit unpredictable in timing. He doesn't unduly strain to poop or anything.

Anyway I know a lot of people say their kids struggled with potty training for poop. Any tips? Just something I need to ride out?

So we've made it to my toddler's 2nd birthday with no screen time. The only time I tried it was on flights at 15 and 22 months old and he was only interested for about 10 seconds! I know that it's not like a switch at age 2 and now it's totally okay to introduce it, but I am starting to think about how and when.

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One day I'd love to watch like a Studio Ghibli movie with my LO but obviously I'm not expecting that he'll have the attention span for a movie like that for a while. I'm also a big gamer and can't wait to play stuff like Mario Kart with him!

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I guess I'm just wondering if I need to build up to that attention span? How do I introduce screen time in a healthy and normalized way when it's not been a part of our routine up to this point? Do I even need to if he seems perfectly content entertaining himself at home?

Mine's almost two years old and whilst there's been significant improvement from the early days, he still eats like a complete animal. He often starts a meal using utensils before deciding that's too inefficient and he'd rather use his hands to shovel it in. Anything saucy or juicy is all over his face, chest, lap, on his socks etc. Dry foods are relatively mess free at least and there's definitely less crumbs and debris than there used to be. He still plays with food a bit.

I'm totally okay with him still exploring food and playing with it, especially since he's a typical picky eater. But what age should I expect him to be a bit more civilized? Or when should I start trying to teach him those table manners skills?

3 days of naked/bottomless went pretty well! He was self initiating from much the second time he saw pee come out. Very few accidents and mostly they were on he way to the potty. He was okay with prompting but did not like if we put him on the potty when he didn't need it.

We tried commando yesterday and he just had non stop accidents in the morning so we went back to bottomless for the afternoon. Got his momentum back and was peeing in the potty again. Even managed a poop which just missed the potty.

Today we're trying commando again. He's had 6 accidents already in 4 hours, with only one small pee in the potty. He does not seem bothered by the accidents at all. He doesn't even seem to notice the pee until it's really soaked through his trousers. I've told him that pee goes in the potty not his trousers and he'll repeat that. When he sees his soiled trousers or any surfaces it's leaked onto, he'll go "oh dear" but doesn't seem upset or anything.

He's taken himself to the potty and taken his trousers off maybe 4 times this morning but he's not released any pee. Probably because it's all come out in accidents!

Just wondering if I should persevere with commando? I'm going to run out of pants at this rate... Should we go back to bottomless this afternoon again? I'm desperate to get out of the house but obviously can't with a naked kiddo!

My almost 2 year old toddler answered, "Walking...cross the road...BY MYSELF!"

Dream big lil guy! 😂