u/diacetylmorphine_hcl

hey guys, i just wanna share my experience with mirtazapine. i first went on it in spring of 2022 mainly for appetite stimulation as i was very underweight. i was able to gain over 50lbs on it and felt very healthy and confident from the weight gain, as before i looked like a skeleton. i wasn’t anorexic but do have ARFID and just very low appetite. i’ve struggled with it my entire life.

over the years i have tried quitting mirtazapine on several occasions but always failed and couldn’t make it past a couple weeks at most. i was on 15mg every night. the main reasons i wanted to quit were because i hated feeling like i was dependant on it to sleep, sometimes struggled waking up, i developed a bad habit of snacking junk food in bed every night, and also was curious if it was numbing my emotions at all and forgot how i felt before taking mirtazapine.

every time i tried to quit in the past, i experienced severe insomnia and sometimes wouldn’t even sleep at all or only a couple hours. this took a heavy toll on me and usually resulted in going back on it. somehow during my last quit attempt earlier this year i managed to escape most of the insomnia! i believe this is mostly due to a new medication i started and instead of cold turkey i started skipping doses and only took it a few times a week before jumping completely.

i’ve officially been off of mirtazapine for a little over 4 months now and i’ve decided to go back on it last night. my main reason is well, appetite again. i have lost a lot of weight since stopping and barely eat anymore. i forgot how horrible my appetite was. i can also confirm that mirtazapine wasn’t numbing any of my emotions, and if anything actually helped my depression and anxiety a bit. i felt much more stable and present on mirtazapine. i also missed the crazy dreams i had on it and consistent sleep it gave me. while i don’t really have too much trouble sleeping off of it now, sometimes i stay up later than id like too. i also find myself grabbing benadryl somewhat frequently and i know it is bad for me as a sleep aid and can cause dementia. i do enjoy that artificial sleepiness tho at night time. overall i’m looking forward to starting it again and be able to eat / enjoy food again! i just hate the initial starting phase because i find the mirt makes me groggy in the morning but eventually disappears.