u/doctorace

We are having serious trouble getting some electricals sorted. We told them when scheduling the call out that there wasn’t any power to the appliance. They come in, say the same thing. “It needs rewiring. I’ll leave the office with a quote for the work.” Which they don’t, after weeks of chasing.

We’ve done this three times now. Seems like a scam.

EDIT: The issue is that no one will follow up and actually do the work.

I’ve decided that getting a regular deep tissue massage is doing wonders for me. It’s about half the cost of talking to therapy, and I do it only every 2-3 months instead of every 2 weeks, making it more affordable.

In the past, I was active at a Bhuddist centre. The meditation has mixed results, especially since I had no idea that I was ND at the time. But group meta cognition (talking about how you think) through a Bhuddhist lense was far more useful to me than any than therapy was.

I’m especially interested in therapies provided by others rather than self care. What have you tried?

I really struggle with having tradies over for a few reasons. The obvious one is having a stranger (usually strange man) in my home, which makes me very uncomfortable and unable to relax or do anything. They leave everything a mess and I need to put things away and do a thorough clean afterwards.

But even worse is their complete inability to give you a schedule. Maybe they give you a window, but they don’t show up in that window. If you call, it’s just “They’ll be round as soon as they’re available.” You have no idea how long they will be there (I appreciate why that is.) They might need to leave and go get a part, and then you really don’t know if or when they’re coming back.

Add into the mix that I have a dog that hates having strangers in the house as well and won’t stop barking. I would try to take her out before they arrive, but since I never know when they’re coming, that’s impossible. It’s also difficult for me to just wait at the park for hours.

The waiting mode means something that could take an hour pretty much kills my whole day, and might require me to recover the next day as well.

I think probably with the heat (kitchen has been 20-26C consistently) that 24 hours is probably a bit too long to ferment. But, if I'm straining after only 20 hours, what do you do with the grains for the 4 hours in between? Is it OK to just leave them out in an empty jar for 4 hours? Do I put them in the fridge for that time "dry"?

My grains are only two weeks old and I'm still doing batches of 250ml, so I guess another option is to increase the milk volume?

After years of psychotherapy that was very unhelpful (including with an "ND informed psychologist), I'm looking to work with an autistic psychotherapist.

I'm not looking for an NT pscyhologist that claims to know about autism (which is what I get when I google Autistic therapist BUPA), but someone who is themselves autistic. The bio's listed on BUPA's directory or the BACP's don't ever mention being autistic themselves. If I google "autistic therapist," I get people who take no insurance.

Can be remote and anywhere in the UK. Please share any personal recommendations or search strategies.

I have very low energy and cognitive capacity that is preventing me from engaging with or enjoying a lot of my hobbies or socialising. I still go to choir rehearsal once a week because the music is challenging, but I haven't loved any of the music we have sung this year, and I'm not sure if that's just my general state. I've tried reading books on my special interest of cognitive psychology, and it just feels like a slog.

My most intellectually satisfying friend has stopped being a safe person since my autism diagnosis and says I don't "have real autism" because I'm not like his autistic dickhead ex with no social skills. Socialising in general leaves me feeling drained, and I often regret doing it.

I can't muster the energy to attend public lectures. Podcasts don't seem to have anything new. Maybe this is depression and anhedonia and not just burnout, but it feels different than when I've been depressed in the past, and realistically I don't have any depression treatment options.

The terms of the lease say the freeholder (a housing association) are responsible for doors and windows. If we replace our ourselves, they have said we will still be responsible for paying our share when they could potentially be replaced in the other three units in the future. They said they would approve our request for £300, and we would be responsible for maintaining them going forward.

We are in the basement and have no shared doors and windows (we don't even have a key to the front door).

We spoke to a solicitor, and they estimate a deed of variation being required on each of the four units, and costing ~ £7.5K total: £1,750 for a license to alter, and for each flat £1,250 for the deed of variation plus £100 land registry update.

The internet does suggest that a license to alter would be required, but the freeholder didn't mention it when asked. If they give us written permission and take our money, would this not be enough?

Assuming the freeholder won't undertake these works until legally required to, do we have any affordable option to get the work done?

It’s not women pushing other women down, it’s still just men.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DVwQOwWCZ7S/?igsh=MXZ5YnBxOHFmNXN5Nw==

Does the Gender Composition of Scientific Committees Matter? by Manuel Bagues, Mauro Sylos-Labini, Natalia Zinovyeva

EDIT: added study details