u/flickbreeze2003

I (23M) just found out that I have chlamydia, and honestly, I’m completely devastated and confused. Did I got cheated on by my partner (22M)?

The reason I even got tested in the first place was because I started experiencing a stinging/burning sensation when I peed. I initially thought it was a UTI, so I went to my primary care doctor expecting to get antibiotics for a UTI. My doctor recommended that I get an STD test just to be safe, and that’s when I found out I was positive for chlamydia.

My doctor called me today to tell me my test came back positive, and I immediately went into shambles because I have not slept with anyone besides my boyfriend since we got together.

We’ve been together for about a year, and we’ve always considered ourselves monogamous.

I confronted him and asked him if he had been seeing or sleeping with anyone else. I was distraught and kept asking him because I genuinely couldn’t understand how I could have gotten chlamydia.

He has repeatedly denied cheating and told me that he has never been with anyone else during our relationship.

The only possible exposure I can think of was a hookup I had on June 10, 2025, shortly before my relationship. That person later called me and told me that he had tested positive for gonorrhea.

I immediately went for an STD test and received treatment/injections that same day.

I never got tested after that encounter, which is now making me question everything.

Another important detail is that my boyfriend has never had an STD test in his entire life. So we don’t actually know whether he could have had something before we got together without knowing it.

What is confusing me is that my symptoms only started showing up recently. I also don’t know whether my boyfriend has had any symptoms at all.

Could chlamydia have been from that encounter over a year ago and remained undetected until now? Or is it more likely that one of us was infected more recently?

I’m not trying to automatically accuse my boyfriend of cheating, but I’m really struggling to make sense of this because I genuinely thought we were monogamous.

I’m planning on following my doctor’s instructions and making sure we both get properly tested and treated, but I would really appreciate hearing from people who have been in a similar situation.

How is it possible for chlamydia to go undetected for this long, especially if neither of us had been tested before?

I'm curious whats the workload like? day-to-day? or how is it everyday? I'm geniunely curious since I'm gonna have my 2nd interview for this position soon

I cheated first… so do I even have the right to be upset now when he cheated back?

Me (22M) and my boyfriend (22M) have been together for a while, and I’ll be honest I messed up first.

Back in October 2025, I cheated. It wasn’t physical, but it was still wrong. He found flirty messages on my Instagram with another guy. Stuff like, *“If I were single, you would’ve been my boyfriend.”* It hurt him a lot, and rightfully so. I felt stupid and ashamed. I apologized, owned up to it, and he decided to give me a second chance.

After that, I really tried to change. I became more intentional with who I talked to, stopped entertaining anything flirty, and genuinely put effort into rebuilding trust. (which is the bare minimum trust me) I treated that second chance like it was everything because it was.

Fast forward to yesterday. I threw him a surprise birthday party, planned everything out, and even got him an all-expenses-paid resort weekend with a spa treatment. I wanted him to feel loved and appreciated.

That night, he got completely blackout drunk. While trying to help take care of things, I used his phone to find a friend’s family contact so we could get someone home safely. While I had his phone, I went into his gallery because I remembered he had some funny photos of me from months ago that I wanted to send to myself.

That’s when I saw it.

There were nude photos of him. And not just saved he had sent them to someone on Snapchat. The account name was “M,” and it looked newly created, like within the past week. From what I could piece together, there was an exchange going on of nude photos. The other person was asking for more, and my boyfriend was responding.

He had a photo of himself spreading his ass on the bathroom floor.

Seeing that hit me hard. Not just because it happened but because of how far it went.

The next day, I confronted him. He broke down crying. He admitted to it.

And here’s where I’m stuck…

His explanation was that earlier that day, we had an argument. He said that when I walked out to cool off and went to rest, he thought I was “giving up” on the relationship… which honestly felt like BS to me. I didn’t think I did anything wrong in that moment I just needed space after an argument.

Now I’m stuck in this weird place.

I told him I feel like I don’t have the right to be mad because I cheated first. And I get that I set the tone for what “crossing the line” looks like in our relationship.

But at the same time, it still hurt seeing how far he took it. It wasn’t just a small thing to me.

And what’s messing with me is that I’ve been putting in real effort to change and show up for him since my mistake. Meanwhile, this happened after one argument?

So now I’m conflicted.

Do I even have the right to be upset about this?
Or is this just something I have to accept because of what I did first?

I told him I couldn’t be mad, because I was the one who crossed the line first in our relationship. I set that precedent. But at the same time, I can’t ignore how I felt seeing everything. It hurt. A lot.