Anyone else have experience trying very hard to present as straight-passing or feminine for their whole life?
All of my close friends are guys or masc lesbians and I feel I can be "myself" around them since we have similar communication styles. Guy friends have always said i'm "one of the guys". Whenever I'm around straight/feminine women I feel I have to try really hard to be someone I'm not to blend in and people notice it's unnatural to the point that people have labeled me as "neurodivergent" or "a sociopath". These same people later realized that i'm just a lesbian who is trying really hard to fit in around straight women and have gently told me I should just be myself and that they noticed that when i'm relaxed and not trying to be someone i'm not I come across as very "dude-like" and that's ok. Looking to see if others have had similar experiences with this and if they have advice on how to stop trying to conform to expectations for women or how to navigate the world as a more masculine woman