u/gorgdhrt

Okay this may not be the right community to post, I already made a primary post but I have something to add involving ed

1. Unprotected sex for the first time tonight
2. He didn’t cum at all
3. Im not on any form of birth control

So, so far everyone is telling me that I need to take the pill, use condoms in the future, and that I can still get pregnant from precum.

I am coming to this community because i struggle with disordered eating and already tend to have late irregular periods. So do you think im less likely to get pregnant because of this? Im looking for answers because im scared and aware i kinda fucked up because we weren’t fully prepared. I wondering if this could affect my changes of getting pregnant. Does my lack of proper nutrition and meals effect this?? Please share advice if there is any. Im desperate.

TW: purge mention
So may be kinda triggering but I just feel like venting about this

I feel like I’m never gonna be empty enough. Every time I try to puke up , it feels like i get to a point where im just heaving and nothing comes so im done right? But after maybe 5 min after i just get this same awful feeling everytime that im still full, theres food that hasn’t left and i dont know what to do to feel better with myself lol! I eat small portions but the guilt and weight of my stomach makes me feel so horrible like ive been doing this for nothing, is it normal to “get everything up” but still feel like im not done? Am I actually getting it up or is this a thing other people deal with?

I’ve been pretty unhappy for a very long time and it affects everything. There are so many things wrong with me that I could talk about for hours, I don’t know if this will ever end. Since I was little I’ve been emotional and often upset. I remember feeling mistreated and misunderstood since I was probably around 7 and more conscious of my emotions. My parents got divorced when I was 8 which confused and angered me, and made me more aware of the pain and problems that everyone experiences. I grew to hate people, chase distractions, I picked up self destructive habits in any way I could think of, I started to hate the life I was born into, my living situation, my family and friends, and I grew to hate everything about myself. And to cope with my questions and fears I suppressed every single one and never let anyone know me past surface level. I feel like I am at a point where I accept the fact no one will ever fully understand me and I may never get to the point of telling anyone. I wish I could open up to someone but it’s so difficult. I feel like everyone hates me too, maybe not hate but I dislike myself so so much to the point I don’t see how anyone could see otherwise. Im not very social, I’m not talkative or funny, Im not good at communicating, I don’t feel pretty, and I don’t think anyone could look at me and genuinely see past all that even if they took the time. I know deep down that there’s a part of me I’m more fond of , there’s a girl that’s happy and whole and beautiful and I want to keep her away because I know no one will ever be able to see past my problems and dig deep enough to reach her. I don’t think I bring any benefit to those i spend time with or know. Im stubborn and can’t take advice even when I know it’s true, I’m bad at knowing what’s good for myself, I don’t know how to do things. I think the problem of me keeping to myself came from how my dad has treated me (and still does) since I was little. I am never able to voice my feelings or opinion without being gaslit and disregarded. Every time that I have attempted to open up about my problems or talk about what’s going on in my life, I’ve always been met with anger or disappointment, it’s basically taught me that talking about my feelings only leads me to punishment so I stray away at all times. Even being aware of where my issues stem from, I don’t know how to get better at this. My whole life I have found it easiest and least exhausting to just stay silent, no one can yell at me or talk down on me then right? It helps a little but being quiet just somehow seems to frustrate people too. Will I be depressed until I’m an adult? Will I never find a passion or a love for my life? How can I love myself better, because it also damages how I love others. Can I free myself? And can I be happy?

Tw (purging / restrictive behavior)

So im 15f and im not sure if i have anorexia or not. All my life i have stayed “skinny” and have never been chubby or gained weight growing up, but I’m not thin nor as thin as i wish i was. I’m pretty average (5’1 and 122lb) but i have always been insecure of my body. I feel like my thighs are too big and so is my stomach and arms and I *feel* big. Since i was little i never really ate breakfast, and since april 2025 ive only pretty much ate one meal a day (i was around 130 at this time), I stopped getting school lunch and don’t snack throughout the day. At the start of this year I notice I actively restrict a whole lot more in what I eat and when i eat it. Everyday i do 23 hour fasts and eat a moderate sized dinner at around 6 (Plant based only, rarely any animal products and if so it’s dairy) and throughout the week I alternate not eating at all for 1-2 days. There’s times when my parents try to offer me food through the day and I find myself always saying no. It’s because I don’t want to break my fast / fat burning and that’s what I fixate on all day.. making sure I get my 23 hours). And the second part to this is I may have an issue with purging. Since December i have occasionally found it easier to just puke it up when I feel bloated or I ate bad or too much. I don’t do it everyday though only maybe 1 a week or less. Do I have disordered eating? Im pretty sure this has to do with my depression and my mental state this year and maybe this is some type of control cope things but maybe somebody relates?

Disclaimer, this is long but please please read it I really need advice

So me (15f) and my bf (15m) have been dating for 9 months. I would say we get along pretty well except for occasional arguments which often get resolved or we find some point of understanding. I feel like we have learned a lot about eachother throughout the school year and we have made progress in our relationship which I am proud of.

During this relationship honesty has unfortunately been reoccurring issue (more so near the beginning). We have had many arguments about him talking to, and/or being super friendly with other girls, and it would make me super upset because I’ve never even had a thought to talk to or mess with anyone else. He wouldn’t tell me obviously and just had issues with lying. When that would happen it would be followed with him admitting he was wrong for whatever had happened and he apologized and we could move forward.

This started in the beginning of the year when lots of people from his school (two different middle schools come to my high school so I was from one and he was from the other) told me about his past and his history with girls and that he cheated on a lot and just dated a lot of girls and pretty much told me that I should be careful.

(Last school year he did struggle with a lot of substance abuse, he’s been bullied his whole childhood, his mother treats him horribly, he doesn’t have a good relationship with his family or peers and made a lot bad choices which obviously still affects him. As a daughter of parents who also have a drug past, I was very understanding of this and tried to see the best in him because I know what it’s like to not be in the right headspace. So I can understand why what was happening was happening but it still isn’t an excuse for his behavior after multiple discussions about this.)

But for me it’s a completely different story. Ive only dated two other people in middle school, I don’t have very many friends, im not popular or anything so I do not talk to like any guys and I’ve never had any desire to especially while I’m in a relationship. So hearing all this bad news really put me off, I found out he was texting this girl he admitted to having feelings for in the past but it was supposedly casual.. so I did break it off with him a month into the relationship because of how much stuff I was hearing.

Long story short we got back tg shortly after that I gave him another chance and i forgave him. After the break things got a lot better, or so I thought. We talked way more on deeper levels and opened up to each other more. In my opinion we really grew and were doing a lot better. He got better at being honest and being more accountable. We shared our past experiences, our every thought, we cried together, forgave each other and changed as people over the whole year and I’ve never felt so close and comfortable. Overall I was seeing changes in him and in the dynamics or the relationship which gave me hope for the future and honestly a sense of security, that things were going better.

Then in May, the last month of school my bestfriend tells me that this girl asked if me and my boyfriend were tg. After my bsf tells her that yes, they’ve been tg the whole year, the girl tells my bsf how my boyfriend came over to her house during spring break (so march..2 months ago from may) and that he ended up kissing her. She had a boyfriend and didn’t want him to and an issue like this already happened before when we were basically broken up for a bit but it still hurt me tons. Much worse this time.
So upon hearing all this and finding out that he not only actually cheated on me, he had 2 months to tell me and didn’t, this happened near our six months of being together, and during that time we were literally good, like we were happy and hadn’t had any arguments or anything… I was livid, and crushed, it felt horrible.

This honestly like really just broke my heart because why, just why. I told him I couldn’t do this anymore because my trust has been lost completely and my patience and love towards him has just been taken advantage of. We kept talking about it over the span of maybe a week, in which he told me how during spring break he relapsed and was all alone (I didn’t have my phone for the whole break so I didn’t text him, but wtf. I still don’t see how that is a good reason for what happened) and that he just straight up was not in a sane state of mind and he made a mistake with that girl. He ended up laying down this entire apology where he just owned up to it and it felt like he was truly sorry, he told me how he didn’t tell me, and he didn’t tell me about the drugs and the situation because we were doing so well and he was really afraid for us to be nothing again. He told me how guilty he was.

Now the whole purpose of this post is to ask what do I do now? I stayed with him because I love him. I know this and I promise even as contradicting as it sounds I’m not just love blind over him, I really really care about him as a person and I want the best for him. But even after “making up” my trust is broken completely. This whole summer I’ve been feeling off about us and a little detached, like I’m willing to wait this out and see if we can improve but also accepting that this might not work. Im afraid these patterns won’t change and knowing that he can do that behind my back while “us” seemingly being happy, just makes me lose all hope for us. Currently we are doing well but it’s only because I haven’t brought up again how much this is really bothering me. As much as I try to look for best, understand that he struggles with different problems than I do, and see the good that we could be, I still feel like I just can’t see him the same nor trust him how I did before.

What should I do? Im so conflicted because I still love him, like am I straight up an idiot? I know other girls have dealt with relationships like this and I desperately need advice. Can it get better? Can we overcome this? We are only 15 and we have a lot of time ahead of us, is this worth fighting for?

Should I break up with him?