u/grumpycoffeee

Something non romance with 25-30 min per episode max (non asadora) and available on sites like bilibili or dailymotion .

Thank you in advance!

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I accepted to be a bridesmaid at a close friend's wedding and got my hair and makeup done "professionally" by the people the bride hired, since there would be photoshoots and I wanted to look good. I haven't felt so ugly in a very very long time.

I've always struggled with self confidence and this just reminded me why I've stopped taking selfies and photos of myself when I'm with friends. I expected to look like a baddie, but ended up more like someone who's done their makeup and hair for the first time by themselves.

I showed photos for reference, but the makeup was not made to work with my facial features - the nose contour was just two straight lines with bronzer, that made it look crooked ( i mean it is a little bit on one side, but you can't really notice if you don't stare at it), my cheekbones looked as if I'd been hit by someone, lips were badly overlined, the brows weren't filled at their beginnings ( I suspect she wouldn't have done them if I hadn't mentioned them), I had to ask for highlighter on my nose, chin and cheeks, correction of the eyeliner etc. It's as if the makeup artist was busier talking and gossiping than making me look good...and that cost me 60 euros, when the price she told the bride was 50 with and 40 without falsies.

The hairdresser- I asked for a very high, tight pony ( think Ariana Grande), I got something that looked as if I'd done it myself in a hurry- uneven, hair strands popping out under the pony and all that tied with about 10 hair ties ...I've done this hairstyle myself many times (using only 3 hair ties and lots of pins, but you get my gist) and it looked 100 times better. I wanted it done professionally, because I wanted better results- I doubt you can get a pony as high and sleek as Ariana's by yourself. This disaster cost me 50 euros. 50 euros for a badly done ponytail, that on top of all was leaning on my "bigger side", so the smaller side of my face looked even more squashed... and the hairstylist had brought in a girl to help her.

I get it, I have a ton of hair, but at least try to make it look even and don't come up with excuses like "I'm worried that if i pull this, it's gonna stick out somewhere else."

Min wage is 620 in my country, so 110 total isn't really cheap, especially for results like these.

The rest of the bridesmaids paid the same prices as me, but they wanted low buns or sideswept curls. And their hair looked really nice. Their makeup was better too or atleast suited them more imo.

I don't know if it's body dysmorphia or perfectionism (I'm very particular about ponytails. They have to be perfectly even and sleeked) , or just them not doing their jobs properly, but I felt ugly and scammed.

I trusted that they will do a better job than me, but I was wrong. Kinda gave me flashbacks to my prom, when I also didn't get what I asked for.

I didn't touch anything up by myself, because I was worried that I'll ruin everything completely. Also, there wasn't really time for many complaints, since I was first and there were 5 more people after me, including the bride.

My only relief was that I kept telling myself that the most important thing is that the bride ( my friend) looks good and is happy on that day.

I'm anxious about the photos and have deleted the ones me and another friend took, since I feel bad and ugly every time I look at them.

The "beauty crew" took some too, with their phones and mine, and when I saw the results I was mortified. I look like a cracked tictac candy. I still feel ugly and even more self conscious about my insecurities.

A friend of mine asked me to be one of her bridesmaids and I accepted. The wedding is at the beginning of August, but we still don't have and exact color our dresses have to be. She sent us a photo ( but still isn't sure if this will be the exact final color) and said we can vary on nuances and dress types. I found a dress in the color she wanted, but she said she didn't like the hue and sent me a website with other dresses.

The problem is that while those dresses are pretty, they're a bit expensive for me. I'm currently unemployed and spending more than 100 euros on a dress + makeup + hair + tickets to get to the city where the wedding will be + hotel for the night of the wedding, since the venue is outside of the city ( and possibly another one for the night before too, if I can't stay at another friend's place)+ gift + shoes and possibly a bag... I'll spend more than 1 min wage ( for my country) salary.

The bride is also wondering if it's not a better idea to find fabric and send it to us ,so each bridesmaid can find a tailor and pay him to make a dress she likes, but seeing as the wedding is in about 4 weeks, I don't see how all this can happen in time.

So how much is too much to spend on a wedding as a bridesmaid?

Ever since I became an adult, especially after I moved back with my mother a few years ago, she's been using me as her personal therapist almost constantly.

I don't mind listening to her, I vent to her too about some things, but after some point, it's becoming too much, because all she does it complain - about her boyfriend, her co-workers /about not being able to find a job, family members. At least I try to talk about things I've seen, learned or read, too.

And most of the time, I do agree with her, that the behavior of the people isn't great, but when that's almost all she does when she's at home, without changing anything, it's becoming too much.

Ngl, the way my father and his side of the family treated her is one of the reasons I'm not close or NC with them after I found out.

After hearing about her boyfriend's borderline narcissistic schtiks, I don't like him either (but he gave me bad vibes from day 1, so).She sulks that I don't want to be around him. I've told her when she first started dating again that I'm her daughter, not her friend and I don't want to be a part of her most personal life. I didn't need to know most of the things she's shared with me.

She doesn't take the advice I give her, insists that we're family and we're the closest, she doesn't want to share with her friends, so she can only share with me, since I understand her best etc.

She knows very well that she overcomplains and vents. I've hinted multiple times that I'm tired of people using me as an emotional trashcan, but she keeps doing it.

I know she's had a hard life, she's a great mom, but all the negativity, her being reactive almost every time I confront her, the playing the victim every time... It's a lot and it's starting to affect me mentally.

Last time I told her she was playing the victim again, she got reactive and at the end, told me to go live at my father's place if I don't like it here that much. She knows I'm not close with and don't really like my father. ( I was ranting about something and I guess my face looked angry, she said she'll take a photo of me to show people how I'm taking to her. She's done something similar, when I've told her not to do something that would later require extra chores such as extra clean up, not give the cat certain foods, because they're not healthy etc. It's like she loves telling people " look how they're scolding/ angry at poor me" etc., but claims it's a joke.).

I just don't know how to make her tone it down a little.

To be honest, as enjoyable as it is to live at home, I hope I can find a job soon and move out again.

I've removed my place of residence from my CV since I think it may prevent potential employers from considering me and because when I had it indicated, I got no callbacks.

I'm applying for jobs in all major cities of my country and am ready to relocate should I get hired.

Yesterday, I got a call from one of the agencies I applied to and when they learned that I'm not from the city the job offer is for, they started fumbling their words. I assured them that I have no problem moving and am ready to go to that city for an in person interview. I told them the days I'd be able to come, since I need to buy tickets to come, asked if they were OK with said days, they said they were.

I asked if it's OK to give them a call on a few minutes, so I can confirm if there are tickets available and they agreed. When I got back to them and confirmed the days I also said that if they wanted to do an online interview, I'm available at any day and time.

I was told that they can indeed do a remote interview and will reach out to me by the end of the day.

That was yesterday. Do you think I got ghosted?

All I asked was for some time to check ticket availability and that was after I got confirmation that both says I offered worked for them.

I just think that if they didn't like the fact that I'm from another part of the country, they should've said so right away.

It's the second time I've been told by an employer that they'll reach out to me, but didn't do so.

PS. I live on the other side of the country, so I need a day to get to that city. I can't afford to pay rent there while I'm unemployed.

There's no job in the industries I have experience in, where I live.

Some ex coworkers want to go to a play together. Weirdly enough, the last two times I went to see a play, one of the actors was a part of the cast for both plays.

14 days after each of the plays, I lost a family member. The first time, it was my soul cat, the second time, which was last month, my favorite aunty passed away.

A part of me wants to go and get out of the house, even though I've already seen the play they want to go to 2 times some years ago, but then again I'm kinda weirded out (+ have some doubts about those co-workers. We got closer the last months before I quit, but I couldn't shake off the feeling that they don't really like me) .