u/hide_jekyll

I experience a lot of delusions e.g. I'm being stalked, people are watching me, my teddies eyes have cameras in them, my phone is bugged, the inanimate objects around me are real and can see me, Anubis reached out to me to show me the different universes and levels of consciousness etc etc. Sometimes I get really anxious and I start taking precautions, but sometimes, I'm like yeah I'm being stalked and everyone is watching me but I genuinely don't care. Let them do that. I'm just gonna continue doing whatever and whatever happens happens. Does anyone have any insight into why its like that? Thanks

Someone I met, we will call him Dylan, is impossible to remove from my brain. We were really close, had a lot of the same interests, and worked together. We hung out all the time, while I was with my ex, we will call him Kyle. Kyle and I were engaged and had been together a while.

Kyle kept telling me that Dylan was into me and was trying to ruin our relationship. I didn't believe him. Dylan is bi, but he acted more like camp, and I liked hanging out with him a lot, so I just treated him the same as my other friends. Tbh, the first time I hung out with Dylan outside of work, he thought we were on a date haha but I immediately told him I was engaged

Anyway, I did start getting confused, because Dylan was kinda giving me princess treatment- cooking for me, walking me home, giving me his jacket when I was cold, singing to me etc. But I was like ahhh nah we besties. Anyway Dylan would give me substances and I was NOT good mentally at the time. It caused Kyle to force me to stop talking to Dylan. Also Dylan did confess he liked me and I caught him staring at my bo0bs a few times but then he seemed to get over it.

After me and Kyle broke up, I reached out to Dylan, cus I wanted to reconnect. It always felt like unfinished business and was SO awkward when I saw him at work. I got another job after a few months cus it was a better fit, so I didn't see him for a while, but kept thinking about him. Gonna note I'm not at all attracted to Dylan. Purely platonic. It felt like he GOT me, you know? Like he saw me and understood my mental health.

Started hanging with Dylan again. Got drunk n high with him. He started being touchy and creepy. It was really dark and a guy was sat on a bench near us which annoyed him. He kept checking to "see if he had gone" and I got the fight/flight thing so I literally just ran away because I felt like Dylan was gonna do something to me.

I told myself I was overreacting cus I was high. Hung out again, it was fine. Hung out again and he started taking me down this alleyway (it was like midnight). So he's giving me alcohol, leading me away from the path, and he says "let's go somewhere with no lights" and points somewhere completely dark, no street lights or anything. I get the fight or flight thing again and tell him I need to leave. I just FELT that this was wrong, I was unsafe.

Turns out he s*xually as*saulted some girls, who reached out to me because they found out we were friends.

I remembered him telling me once that he's done some really bad things. I remembered him giving me substances when I kept telling him I had a difficult time saying no, and that he shouldn't ask me. I remember the way he looked at me, how my ex warned me about him, how he inched closer, started touching me. I remember that after I ran away, he texted me, saying that he was sorry for being touchy. Then he deleted it and acted like nothing ever happened.

I blocked him. I no longer felt safe. Then he texted me. I didn't have his number anymore, I got rid of it years ago. I asked who it was, he said it was Dylan. "I was going to make you guess, but I'm feeling nice today".

I haven't replied. I feel sick when he flashes up in my head, when he appears in my dreams. He was like a magnet, pulling me in once. Now I hope to repel him for the rest of my life. I keep expecting to bump into him. He really scared me. But because he didn't r*pe me or anything I don't feel entitled to be scared. I still feel I'm overreacting. Should I reach out to him? Maybe he could clear some things up. Maybe I got scared for no reason. Idk what to doooo

Someone I met, we will call him Dylan, is impossible to remove from my brain. We were really close, had a lot of the same interests, and worked together. We hung out all the time, while I was with my ex, we will call him Kyle. Kyle and I were engaged and had been together a while.

Kyle kept telling me that Dylan was into me and was trying to ruin our relationship. I didn't believe him. Dylan is bi, but he acted more like camp, and I liked hanging out with him a lot, so I just treated him the same as my other friends. Tbh, the first time I hung out with Dylan outside of work, he thought we were on a date haha but I immediately told him I was engaged

Anyway, I did start getting confused, because Dylan was kinda giving me princess treatment- cooking for me, walking me home, giving me his jacket when I was cold, singing to me etc. But I was like ahhh nah we besties. Anyway Dylan would give me substances and I was NOT good mentally at the time. It caused Kyle to force me to stop talking to Dylan. Also Dylan did confess he liked me and I caught him staring at my bo0bs a few times but then he seemed to get over it.

After me and Kyle broke up, I reached out to Dylan, cus I wanted to reconnect. It always felt like unfinished business and was SO awkward when I saw him at work. I got another job after a few months cus it was a better fit, so I didn't see him for a while, but kept thinking about him. Gonna note I'm not at all attracted to Dylan. Purely platonic. It felt like he GOT me, you know? Like he saw me and understood my mental health.

Started hanging with Dylan again. Got drunk n high with him. He started being touchy and creepy. It was really dark and a guy was sat on a bench near us which annoyed him. He kept checking to "see if he had gone" and I got the fight/flight thing so I literally just ran away because I felt like Dylan was gonna do something to me.

I told myself I was overreacting cus I was high. Hung out again, it was fine. Hung out again and he started taking me down this alleyway (it was like midnight). So he's giving me alcohol, leading me away from the path, and he says "let's go somewhere with no lights" and points somewhere completely dark, no street lights or anything. I get the fight or flight thing again and tell him I need to leave. I just FELT that this was wrong, I was unsafe.

Turns out he s*xually as*saulted some girls, who reached out to me because they found out we were friends.

I remembered him telling me once that he's done some really bad things. I remembered him giving me substances when I kept telling him I had a difficult time saying no, and that he shouldn't ask me. I remember the way he looked at me, how my ex warned me about him, how he inched closer, started touching me. I remember that after I ran away, he texted me, saying that he was sorry for being touchy. Then he deleted it and acted like nothing ever happened.

I blocked him. I no longer felt safe. Then he texted me. I didn't have his number anymore, I got rid of it years ago. I asked who it was, he said it was Dylan. "I was going to make you guess, but I'm feeling nice today".

I haven't replied. I feel sick when he flashes up in my head, when he appears in my dreams. He was like a magnet, pulling me in once. Now I hope to repel him for the rest of my life. I keep expecting to bump into him. He really scared me. But because he didn't r*pe me or anything I don't feel entitled to be scared. I still feel I'm overreacting. Idk what to do

Someone I met, we will call him Dylan, is impossible to remove from my brain. We were really close, had a lot of the same interests, and worked together. We hung out all the time, while I was with my ex, we will call him Kyle. Kyle and I were engaged and had been together a while.

Kyle kept telling me that Dylan was into me and was trying to ruin our relationship. I didn't believe him. Dylan is bi, but he acted more like camp, and I liked hanging out with him a lot, so I just treated him the same as my other friends. Tbh, the first time I hung out with Dylan outside of work, he thought we were on a date haha but I immediately told him I was engaged

Anyway, I did start getting confused, because Dylan was kinda giving me princess treatment- cooking for me, walking me home, giving me his jacket when I was cold, singing to me etc. But I was like ahhh nah we besties. Anyway Dylan would give me substances and I was NOT good mentally at the time. It caused Kyle to force me to stop talking to Dylan. Also Dylan did confess he liked me and I caught him staring at my bo0bs a few times but then he seemed to get over it.

After me and Kyle broke up, I reached out to Dylan, cus I wanted to reconnect. It always felt like unfinished business and was SO awkward when I saw him at work. I got another job after a few months cus it was a better fit, so I didn't see him for a while, but kept thinking about him. Gonna note I'm not at all attracted to Dylan. Purely platonic. It felt like he GOT me, you know? Like he saw me and understood my mental health.

Started hanging with Dylan again. Got drunk n high with him. He started being touchy and creepy. It was really dark and a guy was sat on a bench near us which annoyed him. He kept checking to "see if he had gone" and I got the fight/flight thing so I literally just ran away because I felt like Dylan was gonna do something to me.

I told myself I was overreacting cus I was high. Hung out again, it was fine. Hung out again and he started taking me down this alleyway (it was like midnight). So he's giving me alcohol, leading me away from the path, and he says "let's go somewhere with no lights" and points somewhere completely dark, no street lights or anything. I get the fight or flight thing again and tell him I need to leave. I just FELT that this was wrong, I was unsafe.

Turns out he s*xually as*saulted some girls, who reached out to me because they found out we were friends.

I remembered him telling me once that he's done some really bad things. I remembered him giving me substances when I kept telling him I had a difficult time saying no, and that he shouldn't ask me. I remember the way he looked at me, how my ex warned me about him, how he inched closer, started touching me. I remember that after I ran away, he texted me, saying that he was sorry for being touchy. Then he deleted it and acted like nothing ever happened.

I blocked him. I no longer felt safe. Then he texted me. I didn't have his number anymore, I got rid of it years ago. I asked who it was, he said it was Dylan. "I was going to make you guess, but I'm feeling nice today".

I haven't replied. I feel sick when he flashes up in my head, when he appears in my dreams. He was like a magnet, pulling me in once. Now I hope to repel him for the rest of my life. I keep expecting to bump into him. He really scared me. But because he didn't r*pe me or anything I don't feel entitled to be scared. I still feel I'm overreacting. Idk what to do

I always do this lmao. It's been an hour, and I just can't force myself to go. At first I was like nah lemme finish this episode. And now i finished the show. But I still can't go. Also I'm really thirsty and I've got a drink right next to me but actually picking it up and drinking it seems like so much work *sob emoji again* help