For clarification, this is the belief that any cis trans allies either not cis or not allies

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(is this allowed? i honestly have no clue what reddit’s rules are on discussing other subreddits. obviously delete this if it’s not okay)

Disclaimer: Not an extensive list!!!

Only contains “general trans” subreddits. I also don’t know every subreddit like the back of my hand so it is possible that I have a subreddit ranked low that’s actually awesome or high but it’s secretly evil, if so lmk thx

For clarity, “General Trans Subreddit” means No:
- sexuality specific subreddits (straighttransgirls, traansbians)
- location specific subreddits (transgenderuk)
- age specific subreddits (translater, transteens)
- gender specific subreddits (mtf, ftm)
- hobby subreddits (transgamers)
- idelogy subreddits (transsocialism, transtrans)
- selfie subreddits (transpassing, transtimelines)
- detransition subreddits (detrans, actual_detrans)

I just want to limit this to subreddits about the general trans experience without subreddits being influenced by the hobbies or places they’re about. Also this already took a fuck ton of time to make and I don’t want to do anymore

also hopefully this goes without saying but

NO BRIGADING! THIS IS MEANT TO HIGHLIGHT UNDERRATED COMMUNITIES AND ACKNOWLEDGE FLAWS OF OTHERS. DO NOT ATTACK LOW RANKED SUBREDDITS FOR THE LOVE OF NART

Dishonorable Mention: AskTransgender
This one is just not a subreddit for trans people, it has trans in the name but is not a trans space. Fuck off

Dishonorabler Mentions: 196, Countwithchickenlady, etc
I don’t want to rank them and they’re barely even trans spaces. Fuck off

Dishonorablest Mentions: mypartneristrans, cisparenttranskid
Perfect places for fostering transphobia and supporting shitty cis practices. Fuck off

REAL LIST

1st Place: nart4
The crème de la crème of trans spaces online. Able to actually encourage a positive self image while criticizing cis society. Properly manages to block cis voices making it a genuine safe space for trans individuals. Manages to avoid pitfalls like being overly negative or ciswashed like a lot other trans subreddits. Maybe this is glaze but I Idc, I have been wanting a more cis-critical space for a while which doesn’t devolve into transmedicalism, doomerism, or anything of the sort. This also begins a trend where a lot of smaller subreddits being far better (imo) which is just true for Reddit in general. You should definitely check out this subreddit it’s so cool

2nd Place: transgendercirclejerk
The parent to nart4 and similarly great. Also doesn’t allow cis voices and manages to be accepting to enbies and the like regardless, what a concept. Usually pretty funny while also being horrifying and sad so it’s one that I only go on if I’m in a certain mood and, with it being a cj subreddit, it can be difficult to have real discussion but it’s still very good. Its biggest issue is causing me to almost get banned for transphobia because I jerked too close to the sun one time grrr

3rd Place: Transsex
Manages to be a community that is about medical transitioners or people who want to medically transition which swears off transmedicalist ideologies, incredible. Also is pro DIY (epic) and forces cis people to post under specific flairs, which is an okay compromise if you don’t want to outright ban them, I suppose. This kinda goes to show how low my standards are but whatever. Ban cis people, embrace enbies and gnc ppl, welcome queer poc, and don’t fear monger diy and you too can be a top 5 trans subreddit. In general though it’s a good subreddit with some helpful medical advice which is always appreciated. Basically replaced the only use I had for r\trans which also scores it extra points.

4th Place: TransHelpingTrans
A trend that will become very apparent is that the more discussion and advice oriented subreddits will rank a lot higher for me. This usually just comes down to advice subreddits skewing older and towards trans people, since cis folk don’t get any memes to get mad at or selfies to jerk off to. TransHelpingTrans is a pretty solid example of that with it mostly being a place where people ask for name, makeup, and passing advice. It’s a bit dry but for trans subreddits, just being not shit is good enough to rank high.

5th Place: transpositive
A subreddit focusing on the bright side of the trans experience is a breath of fresh air compared to the other subreddits on this list. Banning debates and criticism is basically the same as banning cis people meaning it’s just generally a calm place. The best subreddit to send baby trans people probably. Not as unrealistic as some subreddits but not a doomer shithole like 4tran and its spawn.

6th Place: TransSupport
Basically the inverse of transpositive’s vibe, but still important. A subreddit about trans mental health is important and I generally find the advice here to be surprisingly positive. It doesn’t outright ban cis people but for a subreddit so small it doesn’t tend to be a problem.

7th Place: traaaaaaaaaans2
Ah yes the sneedpill subreddit or whatever 4tran says. Honestly not that bad Imo. Can it be cringe? Occasionally. Is it filled with a lot of talented people? Certainly. This is probably the best subreddit for just general trans browsing. I see pretty based opinions pretty often here and it outright rejects transmedicalism which is always a plus. My main hangup is that cis people aren’t banned but I don’t think I’ve seen any stupid cis posting so I let it slide. Overall just kinda overhated, let trans people have some joy in their life like damn.

8th Place: TransyTalk
TransyTalk is definitely not a subreddit filled with activity but it has a small community which manages to discuss negative aspects of trans life while not being the most miserable people on the planet. wow! what a concept! I considered a minimum user requirement so I didn’t have to fill the top of this list with subs most people haven’t seen but I decided against it because it would probably lead to nart4 getting left out which would be weird.

9th Place: countttt
So there’s 4 separate 4tran subreddits who all apparently dislike each other Maybe? Frankly I can’t tell the difference between a lot of them but I tried regardless. Anyways, Countttt is 4tran Countwithchickenlady oh God. Actually not the Worst though? Like it’s still 4tran adjacent so there’s some insanity but they’re not nearly as enbyphobic as the rest from my admittedly brief scroll. Frankly if the name was different and they didn’t use 4tran lingo this place would just be traa2 but if everyone was depressed instead of horny. It reads more as the natural progression for trans people from egg irl to traa to countttt. Sequentially getting more cynical before breaking free and being reborn as a beautiful cognitohazard.

10th Place: egg_irl
Honestly overhated. It’s kinda cringe but it’s mostly filled with younger trans folk. The biggest issue with egg_irl outside of the cringe is their weird dance around whether they accept DIY or not. They don’t allow posts about it but sometimes do and claim
to be pro-DIY but have it as a banned topic in their rules? It’s weird and frankly eggs and babytrans ppl need DIY just as much as the rest sometimes more since HRT can be difficult to get quickly in a lot of places even if it’s legal so it’s kinda shitty. I also don’t think many cis people use this one, at least I never noticed any when I used to browse here. Funnily enough I think it’s cis hatred towards “egg culture” which insulates egg_irl from having to put up with them as much as certain… other places. Can sometimes be creepy and again, cringe, but it’s also a subreddit which has helped a lot of trans people while making the cis uncomfortable which makes me like it a bit more :3

11th Place: transgender
The “Pure Neutral” trans subreddit, meaning that everything beneath it is less than neutral. I don’t really have anything to say about this one, it’s just a doomer news subreddit which is moderately helpful, I guess? In general it’s a lot like other reddit news subs where it’s a lot of sensationalism and clickbait so I’d just avoid this one.

12th Place: trans
The biggest trans subreddit while simultaneously being one of the shittiest. Denying submissions from cis people and being DIY accepting is a good start but I’d be amiss to not mention that this subreddit treats trans men extremely poorly alongside previously hiring a conservative mod. I don’t have much to say here. Maybe it’s better now but I don’t really care. There’s individual subreddits that are better for memes, discussion, advice, everything really. Shameful subreddit yet still manages to be above 9 others. This is going to be painful.

13th Place: Nestofeggs
Oh BOY, here’s one that pisses me off massively. It’s not the most active sub but frankly the activity here isn’t the problem, it’s the rules. Yep, this is a trans mental health support subreddit where DIY is banned from being discussed because it’s “dangerous.” Get real. So yeah this place can fuck off somewhere, ridiculous.

14th Place: 4tran4
Now for the rapid downward spiral of trans subreddits to Really start beginning with a group of 4tran subreddits. I’ll be blunt, I can’t tell the difference between these 3 so I’m just gonna rank them randomly and talk about them all here. 4tran as a whole has the same problem in every iteration, they ban cis participation, freeing themselves from the expectations cis people place on them…
only to reinforce cis ideas on how gender and society should be? while also being fucking miserable? why!? it’s just so weird, they’re on the cusp of greatness but alas, no such luck. The standard of gnc hate, transmedicalism, and enbyphobia is present with all of this along with a nice dosage of doomerism and self hatred which makes a perfect little echo chamber for miserable trans people. 4tran Is a bad thing for the trans community not because of bs like optics but because it convinces so many that being trans is a curse and that they should give up which is horrible.

15th Place: 4tran
4tran having less members than 4tran4 is weird but whatever

16th Place: 4tranistan
No more please

17th Place: TransSpace
Yeah this one is a small subreddit and the only posts to get traction are ones that belong in AskTransgender. Pass!

18th Place: honesttransgender
And here we go… the final 4 subreddits, the 4 transmedicalist subreddits, the worst trans communities Reddit has to offer. Are you ready? I’m not. The first one up is honesttransgender except instead of honest they mean dickish. However, I do think it’s the least terrible since it isn’t Explicitly transmedicalist. It is but there’s a few posts which are a bit more just regular misery from trans people which is slightly preferable.

19th Place: truscum
truscum, the true scum of trans reddit. that’s mean spirited yes but so is this subreddit. I’m not going to insult your intelligence by explaining why truscum is terrible. There’s nothing redeemable about this place. Yet I still believe there’s worse as truscum is somehow less mean spirited than the last two.

20th Place: Transsexual
Wasn’t even sure if I should include this one since the users seem to be desperate to separate transsexuals and transgenders for the sake of… uh… iunno. This one sucks moving on.

21st Place: Transmedical
So the worst Trans Subreddit is, unsurprisingly, the one outright calling itself transmedical. I don’t want to do this anymore, I’ve had to scroll through so many shitty subreddits for this ranking that it makes me miss fake cis allies in cwcl. It breaks my heart how dark trans peoples’ hearts can become as a result of society’s abuse. Remember to take care of yourself, the world’s cruelty can hurt but the right community truly can help.

So what did we learn today class? That the internet feeds off negativity? That cis oppressors lead to widespread trans misery? That many trans people need to have more respect for themselves? Who knows, all I know is this was a stupid idea and I hated doing it, okay byeeee

Please read the entire post before commenting.

I (18F) am going out of state (to a different US state) for college. It’s exciting and freeing but I’m also kind of lost.

First though, some background:

I took some advanced courses in high school and had high enough grades to where I was able to get all of my tuition covered outside of room and board, which is excellent! It means I can go for pretty cheap (~16k for a degree, assuming worst case scenario) Unfortunately I just have no clue if college actually has anything beneficial for me. When I was applying for colleges and picking a major, I sort of just chose Accounting since it got people off my back and I didn’t want any more pressure put on me. Yet I feel like that decision is starting to haunt me.

I’ll cut to the chase and say that the only thing I really care about in life is storytelling and art. I’m sure people frequently commenting on this subreddit have heard it before: The only thing that truly makes me feel Alive is writing, creating stories, analyzing art, y’know dumb stuff like that. Unfortunately for me, I just don’t really see why I should bother committing myself to things I Don’t have any interest in. I get the idea of contributing to society or something but I also don’t like the idea of wasting my only life on… yknow. I also have no siblings or desire for children so I feel perfectly fine with taking risks and dealing with the fallout myself. However, I am fully aware that the world is quite hostile to the idea of doing anything creative as an actual career.

So now I’m just left wondering how stupid of a decision that I’m willing to make. I’m well aware that a very easy life is presenting itself to me. Get a solid job with an accounting degree, actually be able to buy property and feed myself, while potentially do something creative on the side. But I also feel as if wasting so much time on something I realistically will never stick to long term is, well, stupid. I’d also likely be in my mid 20s by the time I even get started with art which feels like the window had already closed.

However the alternative also feels extremely stupid. Ignoring the path infront of me to either switch majors to something creative which is probably not going to get me a job or just halfass/ditch college to gamble on my success which is incredibly risky. So it really seems like whatever decision I make is just stupid and wrong since I’m either betraying basic logic or my own desires.

I’m well aware of the general idea that actually doing something you are passionate about as a career is seen as unrealistic but I don’t really… care. Perhaps that comes across as naive, arrogant, and stupid which is maybe probably true but I don’t know. I just can’t see a life where I follow accounting or whatever as a life I actually want to have lived. It would just be me surviving which doesn’t seem the most appealing. Just Being alive doesn’t really do it for me, if that makes sense.

I suppose I’m just trying to see if there’s some way to make this all work out in a way that isn’t a complete disaster. What doesn’t help is that I have completely wasted my teen years so I don’t have any particularly useful skills, I also don’t know anyone up where I’m moving, and additionally I have little in terms of funds so I’m essentially getting a complete reset on my life. (which is what i want from college, to be clear)

All of that combined leads me here, kind of just looking for some more input from people who have lived a bit more life and gone through the college experience before.

Any thoughts or suggestions are appreciated but if your advice boils down to “don’t do writing/art, it’s not a real(istic) career” your efforts are better used elsewhere. I am far too stupid to listen. I could also do without any personal attacks. I’m an extremely emotionally volatile teenager. If you read this expecting a fully logical thought process, I apologize.

On that note, I know that in the grand scheme of things I’m young which is generally used as both a reason to take and avoid risks but I have various personal/health reasons to doubt my own longevity, so to speak, which is partially why I’m so concerned about this. It feels like any errors are wasting my already limited time so I need to optimize everything.

Sorry if this came off as rambly or whatever but I’m just feeling kind of helpless and overwhelmed without any real support to make this decision clearer. It feels like I’m choosing a path for my entire life but I’ve only just woken up and am being screamed at to move forward, so my brain has decided to jump away from either path into the forest besides them until someone comes by which I can follow.

Thank you for reading and for any assistance, truly 💚

I’m not entirely sure this post is allowed here but it’s been on my mind a lot and I’m wondering what other people think. Please remove this post if it’s not suitable ofc.

So a somewhat common suggestion I see in a lot of Tralsei discussions is that Ralsei, instead of being transfem, is actually genderfluid (or occasionally bigender, both work for what I’m going to talk about despite being distinct so keep that in mind)

Personally I like genderfluid (and bigender) Ralsei, I think it makes sense and could be great representation since I’m not sure if I know of any genderfluid/bigender characters in media as popular as Deltarune.

However, every time it comes up as a comment I get so so So concerned, let me explain why.

It’s no secret that the Deltarune community has a problem with transphobia, we’re 70 citations deep into Kris’ pronouns and Tralsei is public enemy number one. Plus there’s always been objections to current trans rep and why they’re not Really trans.

So with that being said, I worry that, should Ralsei be revealed to be bigender or genderfluid, people would still exclusively refer to Ralsei using he/him and completely ignore and deny the trans representation while also spitting in the face of genderfluid and bigender identities as well as ignoring the struggles that individuals with those identities can face.

It also feels extremely possible to me that, since transfem Ralsei specifically wasn’t confirmed, the same people currently hating Tralsei would immediately jump to further outcast Tralsei supporters since they “forced” everyone to support an “incorrect headcanon.”

I make this post partially to air out my concerns but also because I feel like, should this happen, it’s better to be vigilant and ensure that people both understand that genderfluid and bigender people are still trans (or more accurately under the trans umbrella) And that Ralsei using she/her pronouns is literally canon in the story.

This isn’t a post intentionally made to make people fearful but I do believe it’s something that should be at least mentally prepared for. It is also absolutely Not a post saying that I hope genderfluid/bigender Tralsei is bad and shouldn’t happen. It’s just concerns about how an immature community would react to such an occurrence.

Stay safe, healthy, and happy everyone <3

Hi, I hope this is the right subreddit for this kind of thing but I’ve been thinking about a recent situation I was in a lot. Fair warning, this is kind of a long post and is about racism and discussion surrounding racism.

For context, I (18F, white) was in a friend group with a few people about a year ago. In this group was a black man who I’ll call AC and a white woman who I will call EG. AC and EG were talking about a controversy involving a celebrity who was exposed for previous racist behavior. EG claimed that the figure didn’t deserve to lose their entire career over a mistake that occurred a decade prior but AC countered that the community around that figure grew far more tolerant of racism afterwards and allowing racist behavior to continue unpunished was problematic. The conversation escalated very rapidly with both of them getting extremely heated and yelling over each other so I tried to step in so they can both take a moment to breathe.

In hindsight I probably should not have gotten involved but I understand why past me did as these same individuals had had multiple falling outs over past arguments which I had ended up resolving after they both stormed off (whether you believe this matters is up to you, but it feels like relevant context).

Following this, AC was extremely upset at me for silencing him which, while definitely not what I was going for, was a fair criticism. I commented that both he and EG both could have handled themselves better without resorting to outright hostility since they Were both friends. This unfortunately only angered AC more since he was tired of having to “play nice with white people” (I can’t recall the exact wording but this was the gist) which is fair and I do sympathize with to a degree. While certainly not identical, as a queer woman having to be the ‘reasonable one’ when dealing with bigots is infuriating but I recognize its necessity (at least in my experiences) if hoping to actually change someone’s mind. It’s because of this thought process that I believed that AC shouldn’t have acted how he did even if his anger was justified. Either way, he cut the conversation off there and I decided to just leave him for the time being.

After a bit, the entire situation kind of just led to everyone in that group going their separate ways which was likely for the best considering how often the group had arguments.

Looking back I definitely could’ve handled it better if I wanted to avoid having to resolve another argument or alternatively I could have just let it play out. I also should’ve approached the conversations with AC (and EG but that is not relevant to this post) differently even if I was well intentioned. I’ve been running this situation through my head a lot recently and wanted better insights on AC’s perspective (and just more thoughts on the topic in general) so I thought somewhere like this could be a good place to ask. Feel free to be as brutal in your responses as you see fit, I am here to learn.

Also for any responses along the lines of “you shouldn’t have tried to rekindle their friendship after previous arguments.” I know but that’s not what I’m asking.