u/lemonpavement

Hi guys. My dad failed his voiding trial and is still retaining 50% of his urine so the plan is to discharge him with a Foley. My mom is a very, very reluctant caregiver (horrible marriage for my whole life) and I doubt his ability to manage the Foley on his own and watch for signs of infection. He has historically been very unhygienic and it's only gotten worse since the PD diagnosis. I highly doubt he will manage it properly on his own and will end up back in the hospital with an infection.

He seems convinced that just "drinking water" and "trying harder" will solve all his problems. Realistically, how difficult is at-home Foley management? How often will he need to go to the urologist for management? What are the biggest things to look out for? Has anyone seen their family member with PD and a Foley regain bladder function or is this just how it's gonna be from now on? Thanks for any at-home tips you can provide.

Hi there. I'm not sure exactly why I'm writing this post. Perhaps for information. Perhaps just for some support. My Dad (77) was diagnosed about six months ago and has been declining ever since. My parents do not have the best marriage and, before this diagnosis, my Dad suffered from treatment-resistant depression for all my life. My childhood was spent visiting him in mental hospitals after shock treatments and various interventions. He was always sent home with extensive care plans and medication regimines, none of which he ever kept up with. I never really had a "Dad." He did not come on vacation with us or go to any of my school events. He lived with us though. In the basement. It's been one of the most painful things of my life.

Fast forward to now and I'm an adult with a husband and home of my own. Now, the Parkinson's diagnosis comes after years of falls and decline. Parents insist they "caught it early." I'm kicking myself we didn't "catch it" sooner. I spend very little time with him except for a few outings to car shows or an air show I took him to recently. I'm sorry that I didn't see it.

Now, the constipation is really getting to him. He was rushed to the ER with a fever/confusion and we suspected a UTI. First hospital said he was fine and discharged him to nursing facility. Then, he spiked a fever again and was sent back to the hospital. They did a more extensive work-up. The problem seemed to be that he was so constipated, he could not urinate either. Urine was backing up and perhaps sitting too long, causing infection. He was treated with antibiotics and I know they did several enemas and used a catheter on him before he was discharged again to the rehab facility. Then, he was sent BACK to the ER last night, again with severe constipation. I'm just so confused. When I talk to him, he does not seem to remember whether or not he went to the bathroom, or perhaps he's just lying to me and the nurses because he wants to go home so badly. He has a history of lying to get people, including me, off his back. Maybe he really doesn't remember. I don't know. I just don't understand what's going on and why he seems to just be getting more and more constipated.

Nurses suggest he start a bowel regimine....but this man has never stuck to any routine for more than a few days in his life. I'm at a loss here. Has anyone ever experienced this with their loved one? I'm once again trying to parent someone who did not have any hand in parenting me aside from moving me into college and several apartments over the years...I want to help and be a good daughter but I also see the continuation of lifelong patterns getting in the way of his Parkinson's management and it may be time for extra help. Any advice or guidance appreciated. Please no rude comments. I'm really really depressed about this and just doing my best.

That's it. That's the whole post. They've made coffee such a fancy experience these days, too. Dirty chai. Iced matcha latte. Espresso with sweetened cold foam. Salted date syrup!?!? God, I truly salivate at the scent and the idea of the taste. Even the memory. I had a few sips recently out of pure compulsion. Paid for it dearly but my God...that sweet, hot bean juice elixir went straight to my soul. My mornings feel so empty. I never, ever get my energy up. My workouts suck. But...at least I'm not running to the restroom 426 times in a single day letting out a couple drops. It's worth it in the end but my God do they have to keep making it so much fancier and more delicious looking? Do they have to tempt me so?!

Open for suggestions and tips but I've tried all the low acid stuff and prelief and none of it worked for me or was helpful..it's the caffeine itself it seems as well that triggers me. Not just the acidity of the coffee. Mostly just want to commiserate with you guys. I'm sober too so I'm used to giving up things I love because they're hurting me but for some reason this one just hits so different.

I genuinely hate the narrative from what seems like Tom, Michelle, and LALA of all people that Kristen is self-sabotaging a healthy relationship and that she's so unused to being supported that shes pushing Luke away. This once again puts the responsibility on Kristen when anyone with eyes can see this is NOT a healthy dynamic. She's being pressured to have sex, pressured to leave her baby with other people, pressured to be the person she was before the most life changing experience where genuinely that woman she used to be is gone??? I didn't like either how Luke was saying she gets in a manic state when traveling. We all know Kristen struggles with traveling but that trip did NOT look fun to bring a baby on.i would have been stressed as fuck too.

He was bickering with her in front of their infant and adding to her load instead of lightening it. Genuinely hard to watch him berate her while his daughter was crying and his wife was trying to console her and he was thinking about himself and she had to tell him to leave because it was easier WITHOUT him there. How is this a healthy dynamic that Kristen is self-sabotaging?!?!? She needs some new friends. Lala of all people should have some goddamn empathy.

ETA: can people stop armchair diagnosing Kristen with BPD in the comments? I'd like to see where you went to med school and did your psych residency before you start spewing that.

...didn't have a dad, never met their dad, was horrifically abused by their dad, was yelled at by their dad, hit or spanked or whipped by their dad, ignored by their dad, brushed off by their dad. Everyone who knew the sound of their dad's footsteps on the stairs or the hallways and could tell how he was feeling just by the way he was walking. Everyone whose stomach dropped into their asses when his car pulled in the driveway. Or when it never pulled in at all after he said--for the millionth time--that he would be there, that he would be on time. Everyone whose dad put work and friends or women or men or drugs or alcohol or cigarettes or gambling or motorcycles or cars or golf or hobbies before them. Everyone whose hearts literally ached when they saw their friends with their fathers. Everyone who walked themselves down the aisle or learned how to be a man from someone else. Everyone who wondered who the hell they would have been if they had a dad. Everyone who is out there trying to be a dad after never having one. Everyone who is out there trying to step up and take care of their aging dad even after he never took care of.you. Even after he never showed you how.

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Love to you all.

Hi there. My father was just diagnosed with Parkinson's and him and my mom do not get along so a lot of this is falling to me. I'm getting him depends and suspenders and a couple other things he asked for fathers day, but what are some things you would have liked to receive or have on hand while navigating your early diagnosis? He's really not doing well mentally handling the official news. I just want to make it easier somehow and have him be comfortable.

I find it wild that I was even trying to lose weight while I was still abusing the sacred herb like it was my job. All I needed was a goddamn break. I've already lost the 5 pounds I've been losing and regaining for months while still smoking.