u/lucyferne

His kidneys aren’t working as they should and he is not well at all. We are long distance. I hope to move to him and live a happy and long life together. This is a very stressful time. I just want us both well and alive and that he gets it managed and gets the best medical treatment and a little help from spirit to heal and recover and restore his health and stay alive. He is my world.

His kidneys aren’t working as they should and he is not well at all. We are long distance. I hope to move to him and live a happy and long life together. This is a very stressful time. I just want us both well and alive and that he gets it managed and gets the best medical treatment and a little help from spirit to heal and recover and restore his health and stay alive. He is my world.

Mother, sister, brother, cousin, aunt, uncle? Are you out there?

My long distance partner, the love of my life, my only chosen family, together for almost two years, his health is in trouble. He is the only good thing in my life, I miss talking to him every day. I hope he is alive and we can be together one day. He was hospitalised with an infection, and I have never spent this long without talking to him. I have no support system. He helped me emotionally we have that special connection, I am so grateful I met him and I get to love him. I know we will always love each other, and I hope we can do that while both incarnated on this Earth and have a chance to live together one day and have the life we dream of.

I am forced to live under inhumane conditions, in constant fight or flight. Disabled, in an abusive, toxic, traumatic environment/country. I never had safety, a childhood, or a life. Systematically failed in every way due to the country I was born in and forced to live in.

I need people who are willing to understand me, see me, hear my story, look out for my well being and help me and be my support system. Ever since I was born I wanted to escape this country because I don’t belong here in this culture and there is nothing for me here.

I deserve to be taken care of and a dignified life. I just want safety and security and those needs met. And a place to heal from the ongoing abuse. I need freedom and someone who cares.

I got a post recommended to me on instagram that I immediately suspected was AI from how it looked. She has AI photos from seminars and events that never happed. The world is getting so fake and the saddest thing is there are people who can't tell it's AI. The profile is https://www.instagram.com/seraphinaawithmore @seraphinaawithmore
It is extremely disturbing. There are so many genuine readers I follow. People with souls who make posts that resonate. Even if some employ some tactics I don't like to gain engagement for the posts. I have seen pages reposting other people stuff and linking to scam
websites in the bio, people using Chat GPT to write text readings. But I had never seen anything like this aberration.

I just need safety. And to have my needs met. And to be able to start and build my life and have freedom and be able to breath and live under humane conditions. Apparently that's too much to ask for. People ask me not to hurt myself, but how am I supposed to live like this? I am in a vulnerable situation with not much I can do to escape, but I am trying my best. At best I get a tip of the hat and good luck out there. That's not going to help.

 I have written and contacted multiple human rights organisations, the UNHCR, I have filed a complaint to the UN. But I never even received a reply. Even though I beg to be seen and heard and for a reply. I am not even acknowledged. There is no single institution or organisation that can help me. Because I am forced to live in an underdeveloped country. And that is the whole problem. I don't belong here in this culture. I have nothing in common with them. I could never have a life here. This is my personal hell. Please listen to my experience everything I have to say. I have so much to say.

Don't ignore me, please. Don't treat me as invisible.

They are so icky and abusive. Everything they say to me is so invalidating. I can't handle the abuse and gaslighting. I have nowhere to go. I feel the same about the country culture I am forced to live in as well and everyone here. God help me. Because no one else will. I don't know how I am expected to deal with this every day. I feel so horrible and on edge all the time being here. But I am stranded in an evil continent.

It seems like the world is against me. My cries for help go unheard. I don’t understand how this is allowed to happen to me. I didn’t have a good life. I don’t have a life at all. Abused, forced to live under inhumane conditions. I just want freedom and dignity and to have my needs met. I live in fear. In an abusive environment in fight or flight. I can’t build a life of my own because I don’t have the means. I need help to get out of my situation. I have written and contacted multiple human rights organisations, the UNHCR, I have filed a complaint to the UN. But I never even received a reply. Even though I beg to be seen and heard and for a reply. I am not even acknowledged. Why do people pretend to care about other people and human rights. When they don’t. They treat me and my suffering as invisible, they pretend I don’t exist.

I don’t know if I can win. I know I deserve to. I can’t do it on my own. And there is no help.

My resources and what I can do are limited. Especially in this place and with everything I deal with. I am trying my best. I have been a victim of many injustices, and all the cards are stacked against me. Everything systemic and many other things as well working against me. It’s not a matter of “picking myself up from the bootstraps”. I am sorry if I am never able to live up to my potential, and build a good life for myself. An authentic life, that reflects me. A home.
If I am never able to have my needs met and find safety and security and able to live with dignity and have quality of life. I have been through so much pain and abuse and continue to face it daily. Just keeping on is hard. And I am doing what I can. I don’t want my story to be a tragedy. I want to overcome everything and have my happy ending.

Devastated. Sacral neuropathy took so much away from me. Without what it took, I have no future. I miss what it took. I have no answers. And it may have been caused by the unhealthy lifestyle I am forced to live here, in the toxic, abusive environment I have been forced to live in for years. In fight or flight. In a hostile country and society. Trapped. Do I have hope. That it will be cured and at least some function and sensation will be restored. I miss it so much.