u/lvivilityl

"Triple win.

I don't know what the chances are of this happening, but in the span of about 5 hours I hit a 232x on punk penguin, another 556x win on punk penguin and then another 686x win on the new nolimit slot......

(Edit) An hour after posting this I hit a fuckin huge 10,000x win on true grit redemption 2, holy fucking shit."

I posted this a couple days ago on this sub, because I had an insane run, and it hasn't ended, since this I've made another 5 grand over time, hitting multiple more 3 digits multiplies wins, and just then jumping back to true grit and hitting a fat 2,100x win.

I'm up literally maybe 7-8 grand in a few days, reality is broken.

Looking at this from an actual probability standpoint, using all the data given for these slots, multiplying the probabilities together to find the actual probability of this event occurring you get

1 in 1.12 Septillion.

Written out as a physical percentage chance, it looks like this: 0.000000000000000000000112%

Even the 10k on true grit is 1 in 6million spins on its own.

What the fucking Christ is happening.

I don't know what the chances are of this happening, but in the span of about 5 hours I hit a 232x on punk penguin, another 556x win on punk penguin and then another 686x win on the new nolimit slot......

(Edit) An hour after posting this I hit a fuckin huge 10,000x win on true grit redemption 2, holy fucking shit.

Prograds still up to their shenanigans, I recommend not using it, I managed to cash out over £50 at first, but this time I tried for a smaller cash out, I had sent in a ticket since one of my rewards didn't track and then BOOM, banned for breaking the rules, they didn't say what I did or anything, just banned, Great. Waste of time.

I hate being myself

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If only I could have come into this world as someone different.

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I hate what I've become, my mental health has been bad for so long, medications made it worse and I've made a lot of mistakes, I have zero friends, never had an actual relationship and don't see myself being in a position to make these connections anytime soon.

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I hate where I'm from, I wish I could have been born somewhere else, it's not the worst place in the world by a long margin, but it's just not where I wanna be, I have a nagging extreme longing to go somewhere else, but I'll never have the means to do so.

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I've been waiting on psychiatrist help for over a year, they barely respond to me and they said they sent a letter 6 months ago that somehow got sent back and didn't return to them for 6 months, so that's why they hadn't reached out, are you kidding?

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I don't know what more I can do, I have 0 motivation or drive, I'm tired and sick of it, what more can this world offer me, what's the point of anything and why can't I bother to just take care of myself.

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Everything makes no sense and I'm just, tired of it.

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I'm not even sure I have the balls to take matters into my own hands, just another thing I can't do right.

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But I do wish I could, soon I'll break and do something stupid and that just makes me more angry at myself, what's the point.

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Thanks.

Gopuff delivers 5,000+ essentials in as fast as 15 minutes. Fresh groceries, drinks, and whatever else you need. Here's £15 off so you can upgrade your life too. https://s.gopuff.com/s/LPcgtT

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It would really be appreciated!

Gopuff delivers 5,000+ essentials in as fast as 15 minutes. Fresh groceries, drinks, and whatever else you need. Here's £15 off so you can upgrade your life too. https://s.gopuff.com/s/LPcgtT

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It would really be appreciated!

Gopuff delivers 5,000+ essentials in as fast as 15 minutes. Fresh groceries, drinks, and whatever else you need. Here's £15 off so you can upgrade your life too. https://s.gopuff.com/s/LPcgtT

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I'd appreciate the help!

Souls. Some cry out for freedom, some bathe in the spotlight,

some are porcelain, and some hide behind the decline of what's right.

An eternity of time forged this soul,

no effort wasted in constructing its composition

and showing off its marvels.

A magnificent light echoes from it;

doubts, worry, fear, buried deep inside to not spoil

the wonder of the spectacle.

Souls beside it pale in comparison.

They know it too; silent they stay, afraid of

perception,

they live in fear to not spoil the wonder of the

magnificent.

One of the afraid, hidden on a page of a book

deep in an infinite library inside,

has a brilliance even more blinding,

but shackled by awe and peering eyes,

they will never know.

Another afraid, inflamed with anger,

through a twisted road of inhumanity and deceit,

crudely crafts a patchwork torch.

Starved beside the magnificent, it waits for its chance:

it will never come.

A third afraid stands guard at the front gates.

Onlookers see a protector of the magnificent; I see a parasite.

Jealousy boils inside, burning them up from within,

spitting acid from its core as it does its best to stay

deaf,

basking in reflections and afterglows they don't

deserve.

They will never be free.

Oh, you little souls, broken afraid,

you wondrous creations are truly blinded by what

you see.

You shout for something that does not listen,

you drown beneath ankle-deep water,

and you measure the random and count the infinite.

But ...

You are so deeply loved.

How easily you could turn around and face the open air.

You need not protect the sun, as you are made of it.

The gates are open, the pages are wide.

Loving arms prepare a warm embrace for you.

I am calling you home.

Where you are love.

Where you are free.

Thank you.

I was thinking about the beautiful poem of the universe at the end of Minecraft and felt inspired, then this came outta me, thanks for reading!

Feedback:

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/xaf68JguVM

https://www.reddit.com/r/OCPoetry/s/scCsQgFmRc

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I have had a few loans In the past with discord, i have taken out one about once per month for the past 4-5 months, these have all been repaid about 100-200 each, I can show that I have repaid them in full with the transfers and messages, if it helps, thanks!

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I have had a few loans In the past with discord, i have taken out one about once per month for the past 4-5 months, these have all been repaid about 100-200 each, I can show that I have repaid them in full with the transfers and messages, if it helps, thanks!

I have had a few loans In the past, i have taken out one about once per month for the past 4-5 months, these have all been repaid about 100-200 each, I can show that I have repaid them in full and on time every time, if it helps, thanks!

I have had a few loans In the past, i have taken out one about once per month for the past 4-5 months, these have all been repaid about 100-200 each, I can show that I have repaid them in full and on time every time, if it helps, thanks!

Edit: I have also now gone off priv post history and I can show some past loans with someone else if needed

I have been taking out loans and repaying them over the past 5 months, each totalling a few hundred and all of them have been repaid, I can show this if it helps, thanks

Help is appreciated.

I needed to come on here to express my frustrations.

The amount of time its taking for me to get genuine help is absolutely awful, I know that the nhs are overworked and they can't do everything but Jesus, this is how people lose their lives.

I've been going through antidepressants for over a year and a half, I have a history of bad self harm and even an overdose attempt a few months back, I am almost certain I have some underlying personality disorders but even if I don't, I need professional help before I go off the deep end, and that time is coming.

I've pretty much begged my GP to do all she can to push for me to get a psychiatrist or SOMETHING, I even had Therapist from the nhs who sent me to a secondary care centre after she believed she didn't have the specialty knowledge to help with my situation, she labeled it as urgent and still I didn't hear from them for months.

After those few months they reached out and I went in for an interview style bull crap, I sat down and was asked some questions and that was it, I left thinking..okay... Something's happening finally, I might get what I need.

Jump forward pretty much 5-6 months after that they finally reached out again, I had literally been keeping myself sane by binge drinking and trying to escape my head, I went in hopeful that something might change.... I got interviewed again, THEY ASKED ME THE SAME QUESTIONS THAT THEY DID MONTHS AGO, NOT ONLY THAT BUT THE PERSON WAS DISAGREEING WITH MY REPLIES.

for example if I spoke about how I felt like the whole world was caving in on me and I was carrying the weight of everyone else's opinions of me... She literally said " well I disagree, you're not carrying all that" LIKE WHAT?

AFTER MONTHS OF SILENCE BEING ON THE BRINK OF RUIN YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO CALL ME IN, TO ASK ME THE SAME SHIT AS LAST TIME, JUST TO THEN SHOOT ME DOWN?

She then said she doesn't think any medication will work (I had been taking all sorts the past year to try and help so thanks for making me feel useless) she said maybe I should get a therapist.

A THERAPIST? THIS STARTED FROM A THERAPIST SO I DAMN HOPE SHE MEANT PSYCHIATRIST.

she then sent me back out and said she would be in touch with what they think they can do for me.

It's been 5 more months.

What the fuck am I suppose to do man I'm on my last nerve, I can't keep doing this.