u/maskedwanderer

Hi everyone, I’m a newbie to CorePower and a novice to yoga in general. I also want to push myself and get out of my comfort zone. I wanted to get a better understanding of the hot power fusion classes and whether they would be okay for someone like me. I’ve mostly stuck to C1 and restore classes. I’ve taken other types of hot classes at other studios, but i feel like I could adapt to the heat (it would help if we weren’t also in the midst of a heatwave, but it is what it is!).

It's hard to give background on this without writing 100 pages, but long story short, I have a very emotionally immature mother and I'm dreading all that could go wrong with my upcoming wedding. She has many narcissistic traits; she's got many untreated mental health issues (she is very capable of treating them and chooses not to). I am an only child, so we were incredibly enmeshed for the majority of my life. I really didn't start to break away until my 40s. Since I've become more independent, and she feels like she can't control me anymore, she cycles between guilting me and being disinterested in me (because I don't center her in my life anymore). She blames my fiancé for a lot of this even though I started becoming more independent long before I met him. I have really limited what I've told her about the relationship and limited their contact, so she's turned that into a story where he's controlling me which is certainly not the case.

Anyway, we are now engaged, getting married next May. Initially, she tried to basically take over all wedding planning and even suggested that she officiate my wedding (I am still shaking my head about that one). But again, because she wasn't the center of attention, she kind of lost interest in that. Now I'm worried about the wedding itself.

My concern is that she'll say inappropriate things to guests (particularly my fiancé's family) and worried she might do something like try to make a speech. Part of my issue is that to most people, my mom acts like a great person. Now if she stays in her little group of friends, I think she'll be okay. The only other person who has noted something wrong with my mom is her childhood friend. I'm strongly considering reaching out to her to see if she might be willing to sort of keep an eye on my mom, but I'm terrified it will get back to my mom. Her friend is my godmother, and I know her to be a good person, but you just never know. Any advice (or war stories) to keep things joyful and happy on my wedding day?

TLDR: Only child worried my emotionally immature mom will act a fool on my wedding day. Do I ask for help from a family friend?

I've been receiving frequent collection calls from Halsted Financial regarding a supposed debt of mine in collections. I know Halsted is a legitimate collection agency, but I truly don't believe this is my debt. It's not on my credit report, I can't find any emails referencing it, I looked at the website and it's unfamiliar to me. If it is mine, it has to be really old, past the statute of limitations for collections. I'm in the process of buying a house so I don't want anything to ding my credit, but I also don't want to pay something I don't owe. I've heard that making contact with an agency at all can restart the clock on debts that are otherwise not legally collectible. I want to inquire about it and have them send me some type of validation, but I'm worried about triggering something like that. Should I just ignore them and hope it's really past the statute of limitations, or send a dispute and validate letter?

I had a trial for my wedding hair today. She did beachy curls with a curling iron. Looked amazing in the salon. About an hour later I looked the same as when I came in. If I pull it up, it just exposes the thinning/patchiness on the sides. Even just half up feels thin and scraggly to me. It’s just discouraging. Did anyone else come up with a style that worked for them? I have all over thinning. I’ve tried looking at different tutorials, but half the time those women don’t really have thinning hair, just fine hair. I have both. 😑

Etiquette question: there are a few people on our guest list who will get unnamed guests on their invitations (ie, Jane Doe and Guest). Do you indicate that on the Save the Dates or just wait until you send the actual invite? Thanks in advance!

I'm someone who has been digging out of a terrible financial/credit score situation (all due to my bad decisions in overspending). I've managed to raise my credit score 100 points during this journey (yay!) and will at least qualify for an FHA loan in that regard. My mortgage broker also says my debt-to-income ratio is where it needs to be, have a steady income, all of that. We're now reaching the underwriting stage and to say I'm anxious is an understatement. What if I missed something? What if I forgot something? What if there's some mysterious *something* that I don't even know about? It's illogical in a lot of ways because I've obviously seen my credit report about a million times by now, but the fear is still there mostly because I had SO MANY little debts impacting my score. Could anyone explain what exactly happens in underwriting? I just don't want things to fall apart at the last minute and I'm in a bit of a doom-thinking spiral. Thanks in advance!

I’ve posed this question to my mortgage broker, but thought I’d ask here while I’m waiting to hear from her. I have a Sallie Mae student loan debt that I’ll be required to pay at or before closing in order to acquire an FHA mortgage. It’s one that’s been charged off, and the collection agency says they’re willing to negotiate a settlement for a lower amount. It would be great if I could do that, but I’m wondering if that would be permitted, or if it just needs to be the full amount. Either is fine, but obviously I’d rather pay less if it’s possible.

Thanks in advance!

I’m finally in a position to pay off my largest debt (other than my student loan) and would like to negotiate a settlement for a lower amount (which the collection agency said they’d be open to). My issue is when they ask “well how much do you think is fair?” I never know how to answer that. Obviously I’d like to pay as little as possible, and they’d still like to get as much as possible. Any ideas on how much is a reasonable offer?

The basics: this was a $15k debt that ballooned into about $25k between late fees and interest. It’s been charged off, but I’m required to pay it to get a new mortgage.

This might be a weird question, but for those with flight anxiety, do you notice any difference when you fly business class or better? We are planning an international trip and I wondered if having more space, etc. might make a difference. Thanks in advance!

Hi, the chat feature isn’t working for me and I’m getting conflicting information when I try and Google the answer, but are there any limits to ACH or wire transfers I should be aware of? I’m trying to put a down payment on a new home as well as pay off one of my student loans and don’t want to run into issues. I have been a SoFi member since 2024 if that helps. Thanks!

I hesitated tagging this as a “success” because I still have a long way to go, but I wanted to share my story for those whose situation feels unfixable.

I started my credit journey about a year ago with a median FICO score of 520. I wanted to be able to get it high enough to qualify for an FHA loan. I have a horrible credit history, charge offs, delinquencies, late payments, etc. I thought I could magically fix things by just paying off debt. What I learned is that, even though that helped, I had a long road ahead. I was so discouraged but I stuck with it. Now I’m at 612. I still have a long way to go to bring it up, but I’m really proud of how far I’ve come.

The things that helped: truly educating myself about how to use credit effectively. I was really clueless and misinformed and have learned so much on this journey. Ask questions! That’s how we learn. The other thing was getting that helped was just biting the bullet and calling my debtors to see how I could fix it. Some were nasty and unhelpful, but most were very willing to work with me. The last thing, get the MyFICO app. Do not get any other. You’ll get your score in real time so there are no surprises.

I hope that’s helpful! Don’t give up! Slowly but surely it will get better.

Two weeks ago I met with a wedding photographer whose work I loved. Everything went great, she sent me the contract, and about a week later I signed it and put down the initial deposit for engagement and wedding photos. I was expecting to hear from her within a couple of days to plan engagement photos, but never did. I decided to email her just to check in and see about setting an engagement session date (this is now 3 days after sending the deposit and signing the contract). I got an auto response saying that she had a family emergency and was going to be out for an “undetermined” amount of time. It’s been about a week now and I’ve heard nothing.

My wedding is not for a year, but I wanted to take the engagement photos this summer which I know is a busy time for weddings and we’re already in May. At the same time, I don’t want to hound someone if they’re dealing with a personal situation.

I have wedding insurance, and I know that if she fully ghosts she’d be in breach of the contract, so the money isn’t the aspect I’m worried about. My main question is, at what point, if I still haven’t heard from her, do I just move on? “Undetermined” amount of time is beyond vague.

Background: I have a delinquent debt with Sallie Mae that is being handled by a third party collection agency. I am currently on a payment plan with them. I am selling my house and plan to use the proceeds to pay off the debt completely.

Issue: I am also in the process of applying for an FHA loan. My mortgage broker requested a letter from Sallie Mae stating that once the debt is paid, they will no longer report it as delinquent. I called Sallie Mae today and was told, “that is a ridiculous request, Sallie Mae will never do that” before being hung up on. (And that may be true, but the way I was spoken to was insane even for Sallie Mae.) I emailed their consumer advocacy department after that weird phone call with the same request.

My question is basically, where do I go from here? My broker said this is a standard FHA request and was pretty shocked at the response I got. I’m still planning to pay and even thought about borrowing the money from a family member just to take care of it now and hope it comes off of my report.

I’m just wondering if I’m wording it wrong or something like that.