u/risque-and-radiant

I (29F) am miserable right now.

In the last 3ish years, I’ve developed severe cardiac anxiety. Before that, I never had concerns about my health (in a panic/death sense). Never thought about my heart whatsoever. But about 3.5 years ago, I started having costochondritis pains which triggered all of this.

I’ve been to the hospital four times; the first time was to figure out what chest pains were (found out it was harmless) and the other three times thinking I was having a heart attack (arm pain, jaw pain, chest pains, etc.) I even stressed myself out so bad that it made me have SVTs (heart rate went from 90 to 175 in a split second).

In the last two years, I’ve gotten many EKGs, an echocardiogram, week long holter monitor, and a stress test. Everything checked out just fine. But I still always think something is wrong. In my head, the doctors missed something. I spent three hours straight last night watching videos and reading about similar issues.

Any time I have a pain in my body, I start worrying for the whole day. Arm pain? Daily reflux? Jaw pain? Neck pain? Sweating? Flu like symptoms? All potential side effects of a heart attack, especially for women, so it makes me SPIRAL. I’ve been on vacation this week, and I’d say over 80% of my waking hours have been spent fixating/worrying about my heart. It’s consuming my life.

I just am so tired of this.