u/sadly_notacat

The only earbuds that fit my small ass ears and the ANC is actually really good. I had two pair fail on me ofc and on my third in three years. My pair now is fine but just impulsively bought another from Verizon, who seem to be the only reputable source left.
…Discontinued for the Fits is crazy to me. They’re totally different shape and not everyone wants that little cartilage thing. I’ve tried those and the beats fit as well and find it to be so uncomfortable. But then again, I have tiny kid size ears 😂 So to actually find a pair that stays put, and are nice and light.
(I also need to wear them every night cause my husband snores like a BEAR, so I have to be able to lay on my side comfortably.)

They were the perfect match. I’m just disappointed.
/rant

I wish I could post a photo of me and my Zorro. It’s only been a little over a month but I still physically ache for him. I want him following me around, greeting me at the door, cuddling between my legs. I would give anything to hear his meow. Some days I can’t stop watching videos and looking through photos.

He wasn’t even 6 yet. Fucking diabetes… dr didn’t know what caused it. He wasn’t overweight or anything. Sometimes I get filled with guilt that his last three months were just insulin shots and hundreds of ear pricks, he was famished and thirsty all the time. I feel so bad he went through that. He was such a trooper tho. We did the best we could but he was so insulin resistant and the doctors couldn’t figure out why. Eventually ketosis took over and he passed in the hospital. I wish I was there with him. Something told me after we visited the night before, that was going to happen. I just had an awful feeling in my gut and cried myself to sleep.

Thank god we still have his sister. I don’t know what I’d do without her. She’s always near my side and she was definitely grieving, too. They grew up together and she didn’t know any life without him.

I feel like I didn’t either. But, now I do, and a part of me is empty.

That’s all. I was having an okay week and then had my support group this morning and I feel flooded again.

Hospital??? Idk. We also have a bidet. But I’ve cleaned the shit out of the whole thing so many times. What could be causing it to smell? Any ideas please

I am really struggling without my Zorro. I’m already on medication for major depression and I’m barely holding on right now. I know it hasn’t been a week yet (day 4) but my work is suffering I don’t know how to function in general and I don’t know how to get out of this. My poor baby was so sick. His last couple months were filled with needles and being famished 24/7. We did the best we could… idk my chest physically hurts, I can barely take a full breath. The skin around/under my eyes is literally flaking off and burning from all the tears. I’ve never experienced that before. (It’s from all the salt drying out natural oils, blah blah blah)

He passed while in the hospital so we didn’t get to say a proper goodbye; his body was just failing him. I just keep thinking of his stiff, cold little body in the cardboard box. With all the little bandages and tape from catheters. Ribs protruding because he hadn’t eaten in days. I resent the false hope they gave me. Telling us what to feed him once he was home and never mentioning that this could be it for him.

His poor sister cries, looking for him and that’s also breaking my heart. She has been extra affectionate, and is definitely getting extra attention because she is grieving, too. Thank God for her I don’t even wanna fathom about what I’d be like in this situation without her. And I’m so grateful for my husband, too, who has been nothing but supportive and lets me cry. I mean, it’d be really fucked if he didn’t lol but he doesn’t make me feel judged or like I’m overreacting… We went to visit my parents and sister last night and all I could do was lay on the couch after dinner, numbly, while they watched game shows together.

Anyway, thank you for reading this if you got this far and letting me get this off my chest. All this to ask if anyone knows of or has used an online grief support group? I feel like that could be beneficial to me.

(PS: on mobile so I apologize if there are no paragraphs breaks)