u/sagittarialatifolia

Hi everyone,

My old phone broke so I had to sync my iCloud with a new device. Everything synced perfectly, but I have 277,000 messages (19.2GB data) and only 2GB initially synced. When I first searched for things the screen showed "more messages will appear when messages finish indexing".

I clicked the blue "sync now" button multiple times but nothing changed, and after a night of leaving my phone on charge with WiFi, it no longer says messages need to finish indexing, even though they've hardly loaded in.

I logged out of my iCloud and then back in, which raised the quantity of synced messages to 3.2GB, however this is still less than 20% of the messages actually in iCloud.

Has anyone had a similar problem to this? If so, what solved it? I'm a sentimental person so I'm desperate to get all the messages synced as soon as possible.

Thank you!

TLDR - most of my iMessages are not syncing to new device, tried logging out and relogging into iCloud, tried leaving on charge but nothings worked

Hi everyone, anxious to dismissive avoidant here.

I recently broke up with a long term partner because of some unexpected and very serious health problems with my immediate and only family member (father). My avoidance played a part in the break up but ultimately I just didn't have the capacity to carry that and be in a relationship and made that known. My thoughts were simply that I don't want to be anyone's anything, and don't want to carry more eggs in my basket than I can. Since then I've felt quite detached from it all, no contact, focusing on being there for my dad.

I used to be extremely anxiously attached to people since I was young (became DA a couple years ago after a very toxic relationship), but I had avoidance when it came to things like processing trauma or conversations surrounding it. I think that's manifested greatly since my dad was diagnosed.

It's been about a month since then and today I recieved a letter to my house. It was heartfelt and I think apologetic, but I couldn't actually tell you because I immediately put it back in the envelope and on my bookshelf. I couldn't even read past the first few words!!! It's like I immediately read the word "beloved" and recoiled. I couldn't read it - I'm looking at the envelope right now and I physically cannot read it. Not because I'm emotional, because that's the thing, I'm not I don't feel anything toward the letter.

He's reached out to me asking how I am etc too but I haven't replied because I can't bring myself to acknowledge it.

I'm certain this is a protection mechanism for myself and wanting to avoid facing the emotions I might feel, but if that's the case it's really subconscious.

Has anyone else been in a similar position to this??

Edit: a lot of people have mentioned I might be an FA, I thought I'd clarify that I don't actively refuse vulnerability/emotional intimacy in general out of fear, my first instinct is to just dismiss it altogether. I used to really crave it and fear it but now I just altogether don't feel I need it or am even capable of attempting to try for it anymore

Edit: after some insight I believe I am in fact FA, as I have done a 180 in my attachment style these past 3 years! You learn something new about yourself everyday

Hi everyone, I'm currently at university studying a Biology degree (UK). My course is tailored mostly toward conservation/ecology as I was keen on becoming an ecological consultant or something similar career-wise.

The thing is, I've realised that this takes a lot of networking, climbing a career ladder, competition for limited grad roles and a lot of applications just to get experience in. I love the subject I study but these prospects are now becoming exhausting and I don't like the idea of chasing a professional career. Something I should've considered in hindsight maybe. I will be taking a module in GIS and have a lot of experience in report writing and coding. I know that I want a career outdoors and something that's purposeful which is why I'm considering forestry as a career. I'm fit and enjoy academia so studying forestry wouldn't be an issue for me.

My questions are:

• Would my degree and skills I've acquired help me in entering this field once I graduate or would I still need to apply for a Forestry bachelors?
• Could you give insight into what your daily role entails/the different roles available within the field?
• What are the general routes people take to work in forestry? I've seen apprenticeships, degree paths, so I'm wondering which I should consider

Any advice is appreciated and thank you for reading

CW: suicidal ideation, loss, substance abuse

Hi everyone,

I started displaying symptoms of BPD at 15, diagnosed when I was 17 after seeing a psychiatrist after my first suicide attempt. The disorder developed after experiencing the loss of my mother. It damaged all the relationships around me that I had, I damaged myself, it was awful to live with and I just accepted that my fate would be a short, fucked up life with no future. A couple years ago I entered remission and no longer meet the criteria for the disorder.

Shortly after this I was diagnosed with depression for the first time in my life. I've significantly changed, have beautiful relationships around me and don't feel any connection to the past version of myself. Despite this, I'm more unhappy than I've ever been. It feels like my entire childhood, the trauma and grief, the intense relationships and breakups I had back then have just caught up to me and I'm constantly weighed down. The difference now is that I don't lash out at the people around me, hurt myself or impulsively try and take my life - I just have passive suicidal ideation. I don't have high highs and low lows, I'm just always a bit low. I don't cry, feel euphoria or rage, I just feel constantly robotic and empty.

I know it's the rose-tinted glasses, but sometimes I find myself missing how I felt back then even though my life and the happiness of others was destroyed. I felt alive because I'd run to other people or drugs/drinking to escape the grief and trauma I harboured within me. I felt immeasurable happiness and had breakdowns every day at the slightest trigger. Now that I don't run to anything to cope, I'm just stuck with myself. I feel hollow, empty, and everyday is bleak. I miss feeling alive, even though I shouldn't. I find myself wishing I could spend one more day like that just to feel something. I'd rather feel too much than nothing at all.

Has anyone else experienced this after entering remission? I feel so isolated because of how things have turned out for me.

Hi everyone,

I'm looking for a tenancy takeover for a house in Leeds, Hyde Park. It's an 8 bedroom (7 other girls living signed already), 2 bathrooms, 2 kitchens and 15 minute walk from the University of Leeds.

Rent is £115 per week including bills, and the contract is for 1st July this year lasting for one year. Please let me know if you're interested as I need to find someone asap!

Hi everyone,

I began riding when I was 4. It was the only hobby I knew I wanted for myself. I rode weekly, progressed quickly and fell in love with the sport. My instructor was incredible, I often helped out at the yard and even worked others' horses around age 12 simply because it was what made me truly happy.

Around that time I got my pony, a riding school cob who stubbornly insisted upon cantering on the left lead no matter what. Since the school started working him he had never, ever gone on the correct lead. I was absolutely over the moon, he was my everything and we were inseparable. We took part in local competitions, sponsored rides, long hacks in the summer, he was my everything.

We moved around yards a couple times and I grew more and more confident in my abilities to not only ride but educate myself in everything equestrian related. I still worked with my first instructor weekly, and she absolutely adored him- probably as much as me. After 3 years my stubborn left-leaded pony and I were finally able to perform flying changes and at last he learned how to canter on the right lead. I was ecstatic and overjoyed with both him and myself for all the effort we put in. He went from a scruffy riding school horse always with his nose in the air to finally using his hind legs and working in proper form. It took repetition and plateaus but it was so so worth it.

In 2024 I watched him be put to sleep after sustaining a twisted gut out in the field. This absolutely shattered me and to this day I can't say I'm over it. Since that awful day I haven't ridden a horse since, I couldn't even look at one for a good year. I no longer had lessons, I didnt visit my friends I made at the yard, it was all over for me at that moment.

It's been almost two years now and though the hole that's been left by his death hasn't lessened I am so deeply missing horses. I'm watching and reading about them, I'm missing the feeling of galloping through stubble on hot days and I miss the smell of the yard. I miss untacking and hosing them off when they're sweaty, I just miss every single thing about this sport so deeply. It's all I wanted for myself back then and I'm so certain it's all I want for my future too. Despite all of this I'm now in university studying an unrelated degree, I don't have the time nor the finances to even consider lessons again, and I don't think that's the route I'd want to get back into riding anyway. I don't have a horsey family, my one friend at the yard had to put her horse down earlier this year and my father that bought me him, spent all his time with the two of us and covered everything when I was growing up also passed away, so I have practically no ties to horses anymore.

I guess I just need some advice if anyone has experienced a similar situation to me. It's difficult as most equestrians I know have a horsey circle, but connecting with the sport again in my case is going to be impossible having lost my father and what I can only describe as my heart-horse. I just know that no matter what, I have to be with horses in the future, whether now or in 5 years. I just don't know how to do it.

Thank you for reading.

TLDR - I want to get back into riding/being around horses at some point but don't have the time, finances or the social circle to be able to. I'm in university but can't see myself doing anything after graduation if horses aren't somewhat included in my life. I have no idea where I'd even begin to be able to achieve that.

I don't really know what I'm looking for by posting this but I just feel like I should reach out to people in my position that know more about this disease than I do because right now I feel so in the dark

My mum has been undergoing screening and consultations for around a month now for lower abdominal pain that has been going on for six months. She previously had endometriosis and does have ovarian cysts. After CT scans, the doctors found a "complex unidentifiable mass" which, after blood tests and assessing her symptoms, they strongly believe is malignant cancer. CRA125 levels came back high, which I know isn't definitive of cancer but with her symptoms and CT they've decided to go forward in treating her case as ovarian cancer.

Because the mass is unidentifiable and a biopsy wasn't able to be performed she is undergoing an operation in about a month where they will take tissue samples to test for cancer and hopefully find out what the mass is, so the incision will be from her chest down as opposed to stomach down. Apparently if possible they will perform a hysterectomy. I'm still not exactly sure what the procedure will entail and in general I just have no idea whether things will go badly or things might be hopeful because they don't know what the mass is. It could just be a large cyst it could be stage 4 and I'm trying not to stress myself out right now but waiting a month feels awful I'm so worried something will happen to her. They will also be going forward with chemotherapy at some point depending on the operation outcome.

She's 52, doesn't smoke or drink, she looks after herself incredibly well, so those are silver linings I guess? But it's just me and her at home and that's when I'm not at university. I just feel so incredibly upset that I have to wait until June to know if my mum will be okay. If anyone has advice, or knowledge just anything that could give me more clarity I'd really, really appreciate it because I can't seem to think about anything else

Hi everyone, I'm currently writing my first lab report for university. I'm currently on the 'methods' section, but I'm confused on which procedures should include references to papers where they were first used or first discovered.

For example, I have cited Neff et al. as I used dCAPS genotyping, however I also centrifuged my samples. Should I find a paper where centrifugation was first discovered and used to separate organelles etc.? Should standard procedures like pipetting, PCR etc. just be written plainly? I'm so confused

I'd really appreciate some advice because I have no idea if I'm overthinking it or not