u/tiredflea267

I’m not sure if this is the right place for this, but I couldn’t find a better one, and it’s been bothering me for a bit.

Last year I had psychological testing for both autism and ADHD. The testing itself was fine. It was very infantilizing, but since I had to take the kid version (I’m 16), I assume that’s normal.

The feedback session, though, was a HORRIBLE experience. She told me I was diagnosed with autism, but not adhd, then I asked her why.

She immediately says she was “on the fence” about diagnosing me and “had to consult other psychologists and her supervisor.” Apparently my self report exceeded criteria, my teacher report missed the cutoff but had some symptoms, my parent report said I had no symptoms, my clinical interview showed I met all symptoms, and the space bar test showed mild hyperactivity. I feel like it should also be noted that my parents denied any symptoms beyond “occasionally” on every single form, so their responses are not exactly credible.

She then said, and I quote, “It’s four against one, sorry.” Then mentioned that she would’ve pushed harder for a diagnosis, but I “didn’t need it.”

I’m sorry but what the fuck.

I asked her what she meant by that and she said that kids get stimulants without an adhd diagnosis ”all the time.”

To which I flat out said, “I think that’s illegal.”

And she replies “Well, then how do I have kids walk in here on Adderall before they’ve been diagnosed?”

And I’m like “Girl I don’t know???”

Then I kinda started crying (not my proudest moment) and she was really condescending like “Mmmhmm… It’s ok to have big feelings… 🥺”

Then I told her again that I feel like I can’t get help without a diagnosis.

And she goes ”Hmmm, but that’s not true.” Then eventually scolds me for crying and tells me I need to “remove myself and calm down.”

Flash forward almost a year into my autism diagnosis. I’ve gotten ZERO help besides my current therapy (different psychologist) that has gone nowhere. The only reason I am still in therapy is because my PCP didn’t want to refer me for a second adhd opinion if I wasn’t.

My PCP put me on SSRIs ”in the meantime” since the waitlist for another testing is MANY months and I’m getting depressed, but all they’ve done is kill my anxiety-fueled motivation so now I can’t get anything done and my head is always foggy.

I don’t know if this exactly counts as abuse, so sorry if it doesn’t, but it made me feel shitty.

I’ve only been on 5mg lex for 3 days, but today I’m feeling incredibly tired. However, when I try to nap, I just CAN’T, and I can’t get anything done because my head and eyelids feel heavy.

My first two doses I took at 9pm, then last night (day 2) I could not sleep until 3 in the morning, then ended up sleeping in until 12:45 pm.

Because of my horrible night last night, I tried taking my dose at 1:30pm today instead, and I’m currently experiencing the worst fatigue of my life.

I guess part of it could be blamed on my disturbed sleep from last night, but I’ve had various nights this summer where I haven’t slept until early morning hours then have felt fine the next day.

My thoughts feel so foggy, I’m exhausted, and my focus is shot.

Has anyone else experienced this? Does it get better?

Anddddd it’s back to the waiting game.

I saw my pcp today after waiting for six months because her availability is so low and she was on maternity leave, and I told her about my adhd symptoms and how much they‘re literally ruining my life, then I asked for a referral to ”a psychiatrist or something” and she referred me to a neuropsychologist.

Then she said it’ll likely be months. I expected this, but it still sucks.

She did, however, start me on 5mg Lexapro just to try because my answers to the depression and anxiety questionnaires were both severe. I’ve heard that it can help with anxiety a lot, but my anxiety is literally the ONLY thing that helps me get ANYTHING done or stay on top of things at work and school, so now I’m worried it’ll just make my adhd symptoms much worse.

I was just wondering if any of you guys had tried Lexapro and if it helped make things better at all? Or if anyone has any tips to help me through the months of waiting (especially since it’s college application season and I’m already being avoidant when it comes to those)

So just this morning I (16F) got a text in the work gc from my boss about a company party (I work at a restaurant) soon. I was really confused initially because I was already scheduled to work that day, but then he followed up saying that we were closing early that day so all the afternoon shifts (including mine) were cancelled. This already put me in a bad mood because now I’m only working ONCE that week, so I’m missing out on money.

At past work parties, I just sat with my best friend and we talked the whole time and occasionally mingled with other people. She got a different job this summer, and work itself has been fine, but I don’t know if I can handle a whole party! It’s also at my boss’s house, not the restaurant, so that adds another layer of new and uncomfortable. I’m not really close with anyone else there because they’re either much older or a couple years younger and SUPER cliquey.

Anyway, my dilemma. I’m PRETTY SURE it’s optional because he said to RSVP, but he texted once in the whole staff gc, again in the hostess gc, then a gc just for the group of people who were supposed to work that day, so it feels heavily encouraged. In that last one he said he was deleting the shifts ”so that you can attend the Employee Party.” I feel like, since I was already planning on working that day, I don’t have an out, and I would look anti-social for not wanting to go. Part of me does want to go because I don’t want to look bad for skipping, but I also think I’d feel really uncomfortable.

TLDR: I feel like I’m very much expected to go to the restaurant work party since I was already scheduled that day (and now, therefore, free since the shifts were removed), but I‘m not close with anyone and am worried I’ll be super uncomfy.

So just this morning I (16F) got a text in the work gc from my boss about a company party (I work at a restaurant) soon. I was really confused initially because I was already scheduled to work that day, but then he followed up saying that we were closing early that day so all the afternoon shifts (including mine) were cancelled. This already put me in a bad mood because now I’m only working ONCE that week, so I’m missing out on money.

At past work parties, I just sat with my best friend and we talked the whole time and occasionally mingled with other people. She got a different job this summer, and work itself has been fine, but I don’t know if I can handle a whole party! It’s also at my boss’s house, not the restaurant, so that adds another layer of new and uncomfortable. I’m not really close with anyone else there because they’re either much older or a couple years younger and SUPER cliquey.

Anyway, my dilemma. I’m PRETTY SURE it’s optional because he said to RSVP, but he texted once in the whole staff gc, again in the hostess gc, then a gc just for the group of people who were supposed to work that day, so it feels heavily encouraged. In that last one he said he was deleting the shifts ”so that you can attend the Employee Party.” I feel like, since I was already planning on working that day, I don’t have an out, and I would look anti-social for not wanting to go. Part of me does want to go because I don’t want to look bad for skipping, but I also think I’d feel really uncomfortable.

TLDR: I feel like I’m very much expected to go to the restaurant work party since I was already scheduled that day (and now, therefore, free since the shifts were removed), but I‘m not close with anyone and am worried I’ll be super uncomfy.

Ever since my (16F) last psych testing experience being disregarded because of lack of parent and teacher symptom reporting, I've wanted a second opinion. I have an appointment with my PCP in a few weeks, and I was wondering if it would be worth asking for a referral to a psychiatrist to be evaluated again, or would this likely end the same? I doubt she would have a list of 2e specialists at hand to refer me to lol

And in that case, should I just wait until I'm 18? I would hate to because I feel like things have been getting a lot worse for me lately (though I'm sure that could be in part because of the invalidation), and I feel anxious about this school year since I was practically on the verge of academic collapse last year and now it feels inevitable. Still, I don't want another evaluation to end the exact same way because (until that collapse) my parents and teachers do not seem to notice anything wrong at all, and those forms (I think I did the Conners-4?) seem to be the primary way for diagnosis.

Idk I need advice. I feel stuck.

Last year I (16F) got evaluated for both ASD and ADHD, and I was diagnosed with only ASD because I was in normal ranges for the 15 minute keyboard test thing and my parents and teacher noticed little to no symptoms (most was my dad whose responses said I met two). My self-report and clinical interview showed I met criteria.

At the results meeting the psychologist said, and I quote, "Sorry, it was 4 against 1" and did the whole "You are still SO valid, and you can still get support without a diagnosis!" and it's a bit embarrassing how furious I got at that. (The 4 being the test and the three outside evaluations. ) Being banished to more years of CBT is NOT support, and it's also what I've already been doing since elementary school.

So, in short, it was useless and nothing changed.

I just think that's so stupid because I'm the one struggling here. My parents frankly never check up on me, and my high IQ scores and crippling perfectionism mean that I do perfectly fine in school, even though I spend hours breaking down in tears and rushing everything the night it's due. Not to mention self-studying every topic we do in class the night before a test/quiz because I can't focus on lectures long enough, and if I try to, by the time I internalize one thing I hear, I've missed three more. My bedroom's a mess, I have buckets of random stuff I was supposed to organize everywhere, I get in trouble at work (restaurant) because I can't remember all the verbal things I get told, and the more things I have to do, the worse it gets.

I shouldn't have to wait until I'm falling apart and failing my classes to be able to get help. My own testimonies meet the symptom criteria, at least for inattentive, and my psych testing from when I was 9 shows hyperactivity in every category on the motion camera they used and a 45 point gap between my working memory index and my highest index, as well as difficulties with the executive function tasks, so there's that for childhood symptoms.

It's just so upsetting to me, and then I read stuff about how people take medication and it "changes their life" or whatever, and I have friends who got diagnosed who hardly had to go through ANY of this nonsense, and it feels like I'm gonna be miserable forever, and it keeps getting worse.

Anyway, TLDR:

I think needing outside evaluators is STUPID a flawed system, and I don't know what to do next.