u/trakumserga

Due to my dysphoria I am very good at clocking people, especially other trans guys. There is one classmate who is obviously ftm (though none of the cis classmates have clocked him) keeps looking over at me and im pretty sure hes clocking me too

This is destroying my confidence to the point i dont want to go to any classes anymore

I want to cry i was hoping to have a new chapter in a new university with no one knowing im trans i just want to cry

I feel a little boring because i keep observing the same species and i see many people with ~700 observations and at-least 300 species

I know this isn’t a competition though, i really enjoy just putting my observations on inaturalist for others to see :-)

It feels like a cruel joke to wake up and realise im so far from reaching it

I don’t like being seen and treated just as part of some minority. I am my own person and I am defined by my drives and passions not my transness.

Don’t get me wrong, I am a feminist, I support Ukraine and Palestine and other causes, I am not a bigot. But i support those causes because im a good person, not because my transness grants me some magical power of compassion.

I hope this made sense.

I’m asking this in case someone has the same experience as me and maybe has had success in therapy.

I have medically transitioned to the point where i pass 100% of the time. It feels very good to be recognised as a man. However, my dysphoria is still insufferable.

I don’t like leaving my house because i’m ashamed of my body. I am not even introverted or shy, but i never make the effort to befriend new people because i’m so scared they’ll clock me somehow. I see a tomboy when i look in the mirror. Working out doesn’t help either, i just keep comparing myself to other men.

I’ve tried therapy before. However even the “trans friendly” therapists didn’t support me medically transitioning and suggested i try being nonbinary because “gender queer people are valid without hormones”. Obviously as a binary trans man it didn’t work out.

I want to stop being so depressed. I want to get better and i want my transsexualism to stop ruining my life, that’s why I’m considering therapy. But from my experience, no therapist is equipped to deal with transsexual issues in a respectful manner.

I don’t know what to do

Im starting university next month. I am more than 1 year on t and I’ve had top surgery, I pass 100% of the time.

However, I’m still not the most masculine either… I’m 165 cm in a country where 182 is average for men, I have an active lifestyle but I am still not too jacked, I have some weight to lose in my thighs and hips but I am working on it.

I’m most worried about going stealth because I’ve never had the opportunity to do that before. I constantly have a fear of people finding out.

I just hope it gets easier with time

I really hate any form of the phrase “fakes being trans” “larping as trans” etc being used when talking about cissexual people without dysphoria trying to claim the trans label…

In my opinion, words like “larping” or “faking” imply intent and it makes it sound like these people maliciously pretend to be trans and fool everyone around them. In reality, most of these people genuinely do believe that they are trans.

I know this is wishful thinking but i think we should be striving to educate people about transsexualism and dysphoria because accusing these, often very mentally unstable people, of faking something they genuinely believe to be the truth is not going to make them stop calling themselves trans.

Saying that certain individuals fake being trans is giving these people more reason to hate on us because that term really does sound like something a crazy old conservative person would say. “They’re faking being ___ so they could ____!!!” is just not a good formula for a convincing statement…

When these people get accused of faking being trans, they make snarky response videos saying “oh buddy, you think i faked being hecking trans so i could get shamed by my unsupportive parents? Checkmate…”

They obviously think they’re trans and it just makes me sad for them and of course for real transsexuals

But feel free to add your point in the comments or correct me if i said something ignorant, i like discussing respectfully

Esmu aktīvs putnu vērotājs un dabas mīlētājs, man patīk postot dzīvnieku bildes, ko uzņemu. Mana problēma ir ka es nu galīgi nesaprotu kā dabasdati lv strādā🫠 uztaisīju profilu un tālāk galīgi nesapratu neko, vairākas reizes ielogojos un centos saprast bet grūti orientēties…

Pašlaik postoju bildes iNaturalist, bet tur ir kādi maximums 50 aktīvi latviešu postotāji un es zinu ka daudzas latviešu dabas biedrības iesaka dabasdatus kā labu mājaslapu priekš tā

Vai kāds spēj šajā saitē orientēties ? Jūtos kā lohs

I have very few memories from ages 0-9 so maybe i did experience dysphoria but just don’t remember any of it… i did some things like insisting on being called a boys name and i was really struggling to understand why im not included with my male peers and being forced to be in “girl groups” but then again, children are weird so the name thing could be just normal role playing. And it is not natural for boys and girls to be separated in kindergarten groups so it seems like that was probably just discomfort with gender roles rather than dysphoria.

I did tuck my hair in hats so i could pass as a boy too… i am very sure i am trans since i have medically transitioned and finally feel more peaceful in my body.

I first remember having severe dysphoria at 8 years old but that’s it. Up until then i was a feminine kid and i even liked wearing dresses.

But it does get into my head sometimes when i see people agreeing that you’re most likely not trans if you didn’t exhibit early childhood dysphoria.

One of my ears is at 10mm and the other is at 8mm. I want them both to be at 10mm but that one ear is NOT stretching at all and it hasn’t been able to size up to 10mm for over 2 years.

That’s why I’m searching for a 9mm plug, the 8mm plug keeps falling out but I can’t fit in a 10mm plug.

I can’t find it anywhere, does anyone know where to search for?

I recently hit one year on t and even though my dysphoria has become less excruciating i still feel terrible. I see guys 1 year on t posting their faces and i feel terrible i look nowhere near as masculine as them.

Just needed to rant

Forgive me if this sub is the wrong place to post this but ive seen so many guys on the passing subs ask if they pass and then get defensive when they’re told they don’t pass, i really don’t get it.

The people telling them that they don’t pass are never assholes about it too

Going on a somewhat long rant so forgive me if this is depressing.

I’m 19 and starting university in september. Im more than 1 year on t, Ive had top surgery and changed my documents, i don’t get misgendered and haven’t gotten misgendered for a very long time, yet i don’t feel like i pass.

Every time i look in the mirror i see a woman, i feel like i look so unmistakably female and it’s eating me alive. I feel ashamed to leave my house because i feel clocky. I had 3 facial piercings but i already took one out because even tho most people my age in my area have piercings, i feel like everyone would clock me because of them. Besides the piercings i dress basic and very masculine, i don’t want to visually stand out.

I am starting at a biology and nature science related university because biology has always been my greatest passion. But i feel like biology is a feminine field and most of my classmates will be girls and that would clock me. But i guess it’s better than pursuing art academy which is even more full of women and queer and trans people. (I am not bragging but i am good at art and i pay my bills with it. I just don’t want to pursue a field that would clock me)

Me being trans has ruined my life so much i don’t want to leave my house and meet people because im scared of getting clocked. I don’t know what to do. I want to take a year off studying so i could work out and focus on looking like a normal man and then join the university i wanted.

I just don’t believe that ill succeed at being stealth, i won’t be able to make friends because ill be too embarrassed of my transsexualism. I want to transition and go stealth and leave this behind

Going to a big get together with many of my friends and their friends in a few months. Very excited for that but i found out that one guy who i know very distantly is attending too and now i honestly don’t want to go.

I already didn’t want to go to this event because i know ill be dysphoric from the amount of cis men that i look nothing alike. But the trans dude who is attending passes so well and it honestly makes me feel gross about myself. He is stealth only a few people know about him being trans and im just so jealous he will definitely clock me and i will feel inferior. Im one year on t and i pass to cis people but im still definitely clocky and i hate myself for it

Every week i see a new post saying that to be transmed you only have to believe that you need dysphoria to be trans,
then another post saying that actually the definition of transmedicalism is letting doctors decide everything for you and being anti diy and anti informed consent,
And another post saying that the real meaning of transmedicalism is actually believing that you can’t change your sex?

I thought that transmedicalism was believing that transness is a medical not a social thing. (And ofc that you have to have sex dysphoria to be trans)

How did transmedicalism start and what was the movement about? I can’t find any resources that aren’t written by a heavily opinionated person

I’ve seen quite a few clips of this happening. One instance was of a newborn wildebeest being chased by a lion- the lion and the wildebeest calf just stood next to each other and the lion didn’t kill it even though it would be very easy prey. Is there an explanation for this?

For context im ftm. And i know i would never want to detransition as my transition has made me a happier and more functioning person, but sometimes the doubt still kicks in.

This is going to be an uninteresting rant but im posting this here because the people on this sub usually understand

I had the most stereotypical detransitioner upbringing: i was ugly and fat and had an abusive mother who was a total “boy mom” to my brother.

As you can imagine, i got bullied a lot for being the “ugly girl” that no one likes. I was sent to therapy at 13 and even though by that time i knew i was trans, my therapist tried to push the idea of “internalised misogyny” on me.

I dont blame her as it would make sense that someone who is bullied for not being a typical girl and abused by their family for not being a boy would end up hating women, womanhood and everything connected to it. I do agree that i have a problem with how i view women i know im sexist in a way because i do not trust any women around me.

It just hurts to see terfs use my exact experience as a talking point. I agree that most “ftm transmasc” detransitioners are just women who have bad experiences with womanhood.

But for me it is a bit different. I’ve always had dysphoria and as soon as i got on t and got top surgery my life got better but yeah. Just needed to rant, ill probably delete this later

Some people here are very pro informed consent and some against it so im wondering, what would be the perfect situation for you?

I got evaluated by a psychiatrist and then went to an endocrinologist with my diagnosis and it took only 2 weeks i considerer this a very normal process and i am overall very satisfied with this type of healthcare