u/user86753092

It is rare that I complain about anything, let alone parenting. But… I am feeling very resentful toward my young adult with PDA.

They have never listened to me, so I gave up trying to guide them. As a baby, they were “unputdownable”. As a toddler, they were bossy and demanding. As a school kid, they either refused to go or came home and screamed at me for hours.

As a middle schooler, made the choice to home school, which was “unschooling” and eventually they stopped yelling all the time. Then in high school, they wanted to go back to school, and I had to leave my job to accommodate them. Six months later, they decide to drop out to take GED, but hasn’t.

Meanwhile, my marriage fell apart because we couldn’t agree on how to support kiddo. Kid refuses to spend time with their dad. Dad doesn’t help with finances or anything.

Now all the kids they went to school with are leaving for college. I used to be very involved with school and friends with classmates so my FB friends are all crying about being empty nesters, while I resent that mine won’t leave the nest for so much as an hour, and makes mess upon mess they won’t clean.

All they do is run up the electric bill, eat junk food because they won’t eat “real” food due to ARFID, and stay up all night. They only talk to me when they want me to buy them something or take them somewhere. I work multiple jobs to barely make ends meet and they can’t do anything to help.

And, yes, there has been some progress made, but mostly I feel taken advantage of and resentful, and I don’t want to come home because it is always a mess and I am exhausted. I don’t want to resent my kid, but I feel like a failure as a parent and stuck caring for a spoiled 6’2 baby.

I received the following from a bilingual treatment center:

“moving forward, we kindly request that, whenever possible, clients' immigration or citizenship documentation be included with each referral.

This request is due to the recent federal law (H.R. 1 / OBBBA), which requires Medicaid applicants and, when applicable, current Medicaid beneficiaries to verify their immigration status.

For this purpose, please provide the following documentation:

For Lawful Permanent Residents: A copy of the Permanent Resident Card (Green Card).

For U.S. Citizens: A valid U.S. Passport, Certificate of Citizenship, U.S. Passport Card or Real ID.

If the client does not have immediate access to this information, please confirm whether they may be able to obtain it through a family member or an emergency contact.”

Has anyone else seen this? I imagine this will be problematic for a lot of clients accessing community health care. About half the people I see at one job are homeless and come in with all of their belongings in a plastic bag.

Now they need to provide proof of citizenship to receive medical care through Medicare/medicaid?

I foresee this being a huge hardship for SUD/MH clients. Like, I currently have my life together, and I know where I store my passport in my home. But, if I were to lose my housing, I doubt I could remember its new special place.

It also cost about $140 to renew it last time, which is a lot when you are in early career. I would be amazed if my clients in early recovery can find theirs.

Is anyone else requiring this? Is this really required under OBBBA? Are my fears overblown?

I am on estrogen gel, that comes in single dose packets.

I often forget to use it or forget if I already applied it. I am the same with other meds and use pill sorters.

Does anyone have a good system for not forgetting?

I apply in the morning and I wake up foggy.

We just had a full moon right? This weekend was bonkers in the state hospital detox. I came in to getting yelled at in Arabic. Used live translation services to communicate he wants to AMA discharge.

Next Before I even learn the names on my case load, I have a client demanding referrals. Then once I prep them, he decides to AMA. I Had to wait an hour for property clerk, then transport never showed.

My desk phone kept ringing off the hook asking for clients, and I can’t confirm or deny but can take a message. I understand you believe they just called you from this number, however, by law I cannot confirm or deny they are here or not.

Managed to fill out and send referrals for 6 other clients. Did not get a break at all, even though by law I have to, so I am not paid for it. Just as we are closing the office, one administrative discharge and security had to be called on a belligerent dude who refused to leave the office and started cursing us out.

I wish I could actually like this job, but it’s just barely contained chaos, communicable diseases, and body fluids.

Bright side: I enjoyed one client and was able to help her feel like she can get it this time.

Anyone else have an eventful shift this weekend?

My mom told me a story today about getting a flat tire in the late 1970s early 80s. She did not know her location. She called my dad on a pay phone, he asked what was in the area.

All she could see was a McDonalds in one direction and a specific bank branch in the other. She knew she was about 15 minutes away from where she was and about 30 min from home.

So my dad took out the phone book and cross referenced locations that had both McDs and said bank, in the general area of where she was and was able to find her to change her tire.

I’m trying to figure out the name of an artist and specific print. My friend’s parents were art collectors and antique dealers. Their house was like a museum.

They had several works by the same artist, which featured slim women in flowing dresses in different settings.

One stands out in my mind was a woman reclining on a bed with lush fabrics, in shades of teal blue and white. I think the bed had a canopy. Her arm was hanging off the bed and near her arm was a I believe silver tray with opium dumplings.

It may have been Erte or a contemporary. I know they had several Erte. I looked through several Erte works, and the style fits, but I did not find this work.

It was not a multi colored bed, it was mostly teal blue and white. It’s been 25 years since I’ve seen it, but it has stuck with me all these years. Any ideas?

Do any of the OTC supplements actually help with hip pain? It hurts both outside of thigh, crotch and lower back/upper butt.

I have gotten steroid shots in the past that helped, but have side effects. I am bombarded with different ads for supplements.

Do any actually help? And if they help do they cause indigestion or other digestive issues? Do they make you sweat out spicy smells?

I don’t want to shell out more money for something that doesn’t actually work.

Anyone with experiences?

I have done PT and exercise, and I am at a point where I can’t exercise like I want because it hurts too much. I would really like to hike again!!

Hi 👋 Ladies,

I have a history of migrating pain, possibly fibromyalgia, multiple bad disks, and large joint arthritis. I have been on estrogen gel for a few months, switched from patch that gave me rash.

Lately everything hurts. Too much to exercise. Hard to clean the house or meal prep. Forget sex (back/hip/body pain). I made that mistake a few weeks ago.

Part of me feels that I am malnourished from not eating vegetables or fruits, and if I were to flood my body with vitamins and minerals, and a lot of water, I would feel a lot better.

Of follow an anti-inflammatory diet for a while. But I don’t have the energy/effort to cook.

I see a pain management doctor, but other than more injections and pills that give me GERD, or more PT that just hurts, they are out of ideas.

I mostly feel ok laying in bed, and make plans in my head of all the things I will do today, then I get up and my body says no way.

Has anyone experienced this and found a way out???

I have the joy of working this Saturday and am looking for ideas for the afternoon group that are more focused on sober fun than skills or processing.

The one caveat is we can’t leave the building, so no fun field trips.

I’d like the group to be interactive with one another, possibly breaking into smaller groups.

Any ideas? Clients tend to be especially grumpy and uncooperative on Saturdays. The group slot is 1 hour.

I just watched this show for the first time and already rewatching. I am in my 50s. Even though my 20s were not in the same era, this show makes me so nostalgic for my youth.

I was a writer, like Hannah, back then. And a singer like Marnie. And I had a best friend named Shoshana (RIP). I dated guys like Adam. I slept with randos like Jessa. I worked in publishing and went to NYC events. I had so much good sex. Now it’s like a desert.

For you young ones, I am like pregnant Hannah walking through campus: enjoy your youth. Have fun. Take chances. Follow your passions. One day these will pass and you’ll be left with memories. Cherish them.

What resources have you found helpful for patients who live with chronic pain and don’t identify as an addict because the substance is prescribed?

I work in a hospital detox and get pain management clients in withdrawal from the ER because they ran out of meds early.

I give information for Chronic Pain Anonymous, and suggest medication locks with timers designed for dementia patients.

Any other ideas? Anything I am missing?

I’m an intern working two part-time jobs and completing a masters. I used to have stellar self-care but as things pile up, it is increasingly harder to shake off the day.

What do you do for self-care? What do you find most helpful?

I am realizing that most of my effective healthy habits have fallen by the wayside. I am not eating regularly, exercising, meditating, cleaning, etc. maybe I need an accountability partner at this point.

I am so tired all the time and I think I caught COVID. I took a few days off due to a fever and cough. I can’t smell anything. I still have a cough and no energy.

Maybe I just need to rest but I feel I should be doing more for self-care.

I’m interning and working at different sites. One I have a desk phone with my own extension and Vonage app. The other everyone uses their own phones.

I am not comfortable giving my personal phone number out. I’m not comfortable calling from my own phone because then people have my number. I don’t want to leave my personal number and get a call back late at night.

What do people use that is HIPAA compliant and not expensive?

I want to keep boundaries around phone use, off work hours, and privacy. Is that possible??

Another post commented that Shu has special privileges and when questioned I was told she is the only one who is allowed to have bangs (aka fringe) and she knows things other girls don’t.

But the Pearl who recruited Daisy also had bangs. Are bangs really a forbidden special privilege or just not in style?

I also think Shu knows more because she is older and has been a Plum for several seasons compared to her friend group.

The fermented Nettles could be something she learned from an older friend, a cousin, her Martha or even her mother.

I don’t think having bangs is a special privilege, especially considering the Pearl has bangs.

(I know this is a small relatively unimportant detail, but it came up in discussion and is bugging me.)

Is anyone watching this show?

In the new episode Paula says, “When I was a therapist…”

I cannot see her as a therapist but there are all kinds of us. Anyone else watching and have thoughts about Paula being a therapist in the time before Gilead?