u/whipndnainai

so my clitoris and urethra hurts like zaps and burns when i do pee, i also pee regularly. i did a urine test but i didn’t have a urine or bladder infection. i also did a high vag swab test but that takes a while to get back the results. i was given antibiotics for both urine infection and yeast infection and it’s been day 2 of taking them, i’m also on my period. i don’t think it’s helping with the pain. the uncertainty of this is going to kill me. the two doctors i’ve been to seem annoyed every time i try to push them and i have no family support. ahhhh i’m gonna go inssne:(

i’m not sure if this is appropriate or not if it isn’t i don’t mind it getting taken down but i’ll give it a try. i’m all alone in this pain and it’s one of the scariest periods of my life. can anyone talk to me?

i’ve been experiencing clitoris pain for 9 days now. i went to a gynecologist two days ago and she gave me no medical plan. she told me that my pain was caused by compulsively checking the area and went on to say how i need therapy to deal with the stress that this is all causing. which…okay sure but i’m still in physical pain. i’m so directionless and alone in this. idk what to do.

does anyone else use walking like this? like therapy but free and you can do it while listening to music/podcasts or just zoning out 😵‍💫😵‍💫

19F i wanna chat with someone but wtf even is there to talk about 😫

i don’t know how to explain this but it finally sank in that every single maladaptive coping mechanism i used to survive is just gone lol. i lost two of my safe people yesterday too and i genuinely feel like i’m dying. my reality feels so unsafe and i’m so alone i don’t really know what to do anymore. i can’t take care of myself and while on the outside i might look calm, on the inside i’m spiraling like craaazy. the people around me seem to be desensitized to my pain so it’s not like i can tell them how shit i feel. they won’t budge. i also know i look insane posting online all day but i’m actually out of options. it hasn’t been this bad in a while :(

i realized i can only function (exercise, walk, eat, do daily stuff etc.) when i’m about 50% present and 50% checked out. if i’m fully present, it feels unsafe and i kinda shutdown. like i can’t move or get anything done. this causes frustration which then causes shame like “everyone else can experience their life but i can’t” and that just makes everything worse. i’ve kinda been doing this since i was a kid. being half here half somewhere else is the only way i know how to feel safe? it’s confusing but i never really thought about it until recently. the problem is it makes me look super inconsistent and unreliable, my life unpredictable and it’s ruined a lot of my relationships. reality is so bad right now my suicidal ideation is getting worse :(. does anyone relate?

i’m currently in the stabilization phase of my trauma healing and i’ve realized i can only function (exercise, walk, eat, do daily stuff etc.) when i’m about 50% present and 50% checked out. if i’m fully present, it feels unsafe and i kinda shutdown. like i can’t move or get anything done. this causes frustration which then causes shame like “everyone else can experience their life but i can’t” and that just makes everything worse. i’ve kinda been doing this since i was a kid. being half here half somewhere else is the only way i know how to feel safe? it’s confusing but i never really thought about it until recently. the problem is it makes me look super inconsistent and unreliable, my life unpredictable and it’s ruined a lot of my relationships. i know this should be a question for a therapist but i’m struggling with stabilization. how do i actually practice safety when this is the case?

i realized i can only function (exercise, walk, eat, do daily stuff etc.) when i’m about 50% present and 50% checked out. if i’m fully present, it feels unsafe and i kinda shutdown. like i can’t move or get anything done. this causes frustration which then causes shame like “everyone else can handle their life but i can’t” and that just makes everything worse. i’ve kinda been doing this since i was a kid. being half here half somewhere else is the only way i know how to feel safe? it’s confusing but i never really thought about it until recently. the problem is it makes me look super inconsistent and unpredictable and it’s ruined a lot of my relationships. does anyone relate?

my reality doesn’t feel safe at all so i’m constantly trying to escape it usually through zoning out, daydreaming, substances, seeking attention in places i shouldn’t be, scrolling for hours etc basically anything that gives me dopamine is really successful at making me feel better, whatever it takes to not be fully here. but the more i escape, the more my actual life falls apart, which makes my reality feel even less safe. then i escape even harder. its a catch 22 im stuck in. i know running away from my life isn’t fixing anything, but staying present is terrifying and overwhelming