u/ycherep1

We had a nanny for 18 months with our first. I worked remote as a Graphic Designer and could keep bf and be there in case of anything. I think it was awesome for us but god financially it killed my whole paycheck. My hubby was able to cover the rest of the bills though.

At 18 we switched to daycare and that was a little over half price. My boss was super flexible as we transitioned and I loved that flexibility that we had. That job is out of the picture, unfortunately (it did pay a lot less) and Im looking for something better but here I am planning the next step and honestly our timeline is short on this decision....

So tell, me how the hell would I afford 2 kids in daycare?

I'm in the states so 3 months leave only

Im seriously considering becoming at least a part time sahm if not full time since Graphic Design is already hard enough to find work in. What do I do?

Im new to sahm life after recently being laid off my job. I have a 2 yo toddler & still figuring out our routine. 2 days a week we can still afford daycare so he doesn't lose his spot.

So far, I wake up, apply for jobs, shower & look up what's free today & where to go.

When munchkin wakes up, (around 8 am) we eat breakfast & go out of the house till naptime. I find a ton of places about 20 min drive from home to let his energy out and explore, meet people and hang out.

My car is full of all types of snacks & plenty of hydration for the 2 of us so we aren't "hungry"

But on the way back, he always falls asleep - thats great, right? - goes down for his nap which is a solid 2 hours. I have time to make lunch, tidy up & so forth.

As soon as he wakes up I get him lunch. Then we hang out around the house till daddy comes home, usually reading some books or coloring some pages. dinner is late around 7:00 or 8:00 because of Dad. and on weeks that he travels we do try to eat a little earlier.

Except I'm realizing we are really off schedule from his previous routine where at daycare he has lunch around 11:30 and then naps. we're heading back around 1-2pm from our adventures and so his nap is still three or four which means a really late lunch.... lunch is kind of turning into early dinner and dinner is when we're not hungry..

I'm thinking the solution is to pack a lunch with us on our trips so that we eat something on the road and I would love some ideas. I have a little cooler so I can bring some ice packs.

when did you stop picking up your toddlers when pregnant with the next kid? just curious - was it a weight or a week of pregnancy?

thanks

I wanted some ideas for long distant family to add to the creative tonies. what actually resonated with your kid and made them happy? give me some prompts and ideas for them to record!

our dad also travels alot for work & wanted to know what made your kid happy to hear and what upset them? mine is 2 and definitely going through dad phase. I don't want him looking for dad if he hears him. but also sometimes, he loves to video call and dad is working a crazy shift & not awake or husy when we can call.

We recently got a tonie box and a lot of tonies. The bags I see online hold maybe 10 and I have closer to 20 (I got a ton used).

Does anyone have a pattern for Toniebox 2 & tonie characters that is good for travel? thank you!

My husband and I are cutting our budget, our eating out budget especially. And it always happens when one of us including the kid gets hungry on the road.

Now usually I pack some snacks but I'm trying to figure out a more fulfilling, nutritious meal that I can keep in the car. We run a lot of errands of the weekends and it's so easy to just let hunger take over and go through a Taco Bell drive-thru or stop at a McDonald's or sit down in Olive garden.

What are you making to cut corners?

So far we have become big fans of PB&j sandwiches but I would rather to find something I can store indefinitely in the car. Because it's usually after we're done with the PB&j that we can get hungry again...

My husband and I are cutting our budget, our eating out budget especially. And it always happens when one of us including the kid gets hungry on the road.

Now usually I pack some snacks but I'm trying to figure out a more fulfilling, nutritious meal that I can keep in the car. We run a lot of errands of the weekends and it's so easy to just let hunger take over and go through a Taco Bell drive-thru or stop at a McDonald's or sit down in Olive garden.

What are you making to cut corners?

So far we have become big fans of PB&j sandwiches but I would rather to find something I can store indefinitely in the car. Because it's usually after we're done with the PB&j that we can hungry again...

Hello!

Our little one loves fish and for the holidays we wanted to get a small fish after visiting his favorite place - the aquarium!

My friend gave me their 3 gallon tank and I was wondering what is an easy 3 gallon tank fish to get that a small kid would enjoy? At first I thought a colorful beta fish but I'm seeing alot of suggestions for a larger tank so I'm open to other fish ideas.

We have a local pet store friend we also like to visit who can help with anything you tell us to get. He will help us with setup & support since we like to visit often to say hi to all the animals.

Note: the kid will NOT be caring for the fish - thats my job.

Also open to real plants if anyone can explain how to care for them and which are easy to handle...

UPDATE: We are NOT upgrading the tanks - Its not an option as we have a verrrryyy smallll space covered in toddler things & there is one spot I could put it & it will not hold anything bigger than the 3 gallon tank.

We are going to get shrimp probably as per everyone's suggestions on whats suitable :) Just may postpone this till I can do research on shrimp options at our local shop. If anyone has any other non-shrimp or snail ideas, please feel free to add - Any specific suggestions on making those work & thrive - what they like. But the tank size is FINAL!

I love my remote graphic design job. Its flex time off, great boss who was a stay at home dad so verryyy pro family and good team with fun creative projects. I have really been able to get a lot of flexibility as my kid is in daycare to take time off for fevers, dr appts and travel to see family.

I hate my paycheck, I have not gotten a raise or bonus. I work in publishing which is in the red so everyone is just happy to have a job and expects to be paid like crap.

I need a side hustle for slow months and tight budgets. I'm not ready to leave yet since we keep talking about another baby and maybe hubby will switch jobs soon. I like my job and its hard to find that culture in the 10 years I've worked and job hopped. Half the people here took a paycut for this flexibility so I'm not leaving it.

My hubby travels for work so I'm main caretaker. He gets told Friday he's traveling next week so very hard to take a shift somewhere. I used to do customer service in the evenings before the baby came about 40 min from home but that doesn't pay more than childcare.

So working moms, what are some side hustles that I could do late at night or early morning with a toddler? Something that would be biggest bang for buck since I'm not looking to pay for more childcare unless I make a lot consistently to cover it. What are y'all doing and succeeding on?

I'm trying to decide what to get myself to keep constant inspirations coming to my home. As a quilter with about 7 different styles of quilts under my belt - earlier in quilting hobby but well versed in basic trouble shoots & pattern making. Also part of a wonderful quilt guild but have recently been unable to make the meetings due to a toddler running around. Im at a point where I want to be reminded about quilting but I may not get to a project today or tomorrow but maybe eventually.

I was deciding between a magazine or a digital membership.

Digital is great because it doesn't take up room but also its not permanet or easy to find in your craft space later. Some memberships and websites are hard to search for their projects or save/search. If videos included, i need captions & 2x speed option.

For print, I need a good variety of projects & not the same hst in 10 different sizes. I love some of the old magazines but can't tell which still have a great variety now. They all seem thinner and not as complex. But love the tactile nature and afternoon sitting through & touching a page.

Which do you actually like and use & which should I stay away from & not waste money on?

I need a list of suggestions for my husband (and myself) on techniques and to-dos during the terrible twos meltdowns. We recently started getting into that age range and the full melt on floor dramas are happening a few times a day.

Waiting for it to end and staying neutral is my approach. If its a little longer and more dramatic I offer a hug. We are weaning but in terrible cases, I offer the boob. In the car, its sometimes passing back a snack or activity to entertain & distract.

Other times, that does not work. I can't fix a banana, I can't change your diaper in the middle of a highway, I can't make an old sticker sticky again.

My hubby just yells his name to snap him out of it which Im not a fan of at all. Sometimes he suggests breathing to him. He also sings his favorite song to him if he's in a good headspace. Hubby also gets easily overstimulated too so a crying toddler is not his forte.

So I'm asking other parents to give him a list. He does well with a do this list rather than just this is wrong. We are working on it & I'm going to be relying on him more one on one with the toddler.

I was heartbroken from the news of Dolly Parton passing. And the hardest part from me was much I have been grateful every month to receive her books. We look forward to it.

I would love to celebrate with all of the parents out there, their favorite book from her library & stories when reading them.

Ours is "Goodnight Gorilla". There is a whole routine, a whole slew of animal noises and sounds that you have to do as you read it. There are multiple readings in a row and there were definitely a few copies that we had to get because we just couldn't stop reading it. It was really the first animal book we got that we got to really play and imagine. There is an unofficial song we sing as we start and I just get into anytime my kid brings the book over. Its our favorite one and I would have never thought to get it. The variety of books and adventures we go on every month is just spectacular.

I hope to hear your happy moments too. Ahe really helped raise all of us to be better parents and give our kids a colorful childhood.

I'm just waiting for my second maternity leave (aka my workers comp) when they get rid of me. But 2 years into motherhood, they haven't...

I used to love work and was passionate about learning and was excited about ai helping out with some basic redundant tasks. I think these last few jobs just took it out of me and made me not like the small corporate bs- i def hate the terrible pay- and I'm just not making any movement to get myself out of this shitty paying job. At least my boss is nice but the company is just -well shitty upper management... But that's why I stick around while my salary isn't making ends meet and my hubby keeps talking about moving us to Arkansas so we can afford life. I like my boss and I know if I do graphic design elsewhere, it will be something boring and terrible. And i have soo much flexibility to spend time with my son so i said, this is a diamond in the rough, let me stick with it a bit. My supported any time off I needed for the kid, for my parents, for work life balance - i mean that doesn't exist really. Ive had strings of terrible bosses, why risk it again? Its not like i will make enough money like hubby who's salary is getting close to double mine. I will always be the designated caregiver... Why add stress to that equation and get a pathetic raise for more hours and labor when its so insignificant?

I had time to get my resume cleaned up but not able to update my portfolio so i know why i can't get a new good job (im still using behance and the standard is a standalone website which takes time to build)

Before the baby, i had 2 jobs and that made me in the green. Now, im consistently in the red and i can do the math - it was that 2nd jobs salary that kept my credit card bill down. I asked for a raise, for more work, for flex hours to cut expenses, anything to make the numbers work. Legit... It does not and this economy, it does not work at all. 3 years there, no raises for anyone, no bonuses, no nothing...

The second job was part time and in the evenings but it made just enough to cover bills when i wasn't a mom but now its not enough for a babysitter. And hubby travels last min for work so apart from cutting our expenses a bit with a cheaper at home daycare, I can't go back. My 2nd job is the toddler now.

Im so exhausted from work and kid and all the stuff going on that, i just checked out but have no strength to get myself out of it. I've put in enough effort and its gotten me into a terrible financial spot. So now, I'm just going with the least path of resistance and its putting my into a financial sinkhole.... I'm venting but also wondering what helped get you out of the career rut?

Speak russian since childhood but need to read Russian since my kid is missing out on all the great childhood fairytales and i read like a 1st grader. I want to read my grandma's cookbook too (but the script maybe another level)

I tried Duolingo for a second and it was difficult to not feel like it was legit dumb since I knew all the words and they were easy enough to distinguish even with terrible reading skills so I wasn't getting much progress.

Do y'all have a recommendation for a good reading learning app where I can actually make progress?

Our 2 year old has great moments and then terrible ones. And I need to know legit disciplines for kids that are smacking dad, or making a loud scream in an airplane or taking off their diaper or pulling out all the wipes from their bag or throwing their food or acting terribly while we eat at home or out....well you know.... I see the name Dennis the Menace a lot more.

Definitely a great kid though just terrible parenting style examples from our two sets of parents (his mom was a hitter and mine were too soft). I want to keep that kindess in him and not continue the cycle.

My usual first line of defense is words explaining what's what. My stressed defense is yelling "stop that!" and then finally pulling him away (Which works very infrequently recently.....) And I'm really needing a better solution on discipline when words don't work.

I really could use some suggestions on when your fuse is up there too since we both have recently been overstimulated with the endless chaos and screaming.

I have a few nights off and I come home to hubby watching kid (22 months) and watching One Piece or even Saving Private Ryan.

Now its one thing when his vision was terrible at 6 months and the tv was far away but now we are getting to the age of speaking and recognizing things & associations. I'm not a fan but he won't listen to me.

So umm... Could someone give this "science" man something to read? He needs a legit and good research study for the effects (cartoon and real blood & violence) that this is not good for our kid?

Can be different studies for each.

Thank you

My hubby is looking at getting a job in Fayetteville, Arkansas. We are from Long Island, NY. What are we expecting when we move with a small toddler to the area? We like art, quilting, good food & the outdoors. What areas should we look at for good elementary schools & safe neighborhoods?

I have some older relatives and cousins I am coming to visit. We live in US. My mom always brought coffee, peanut butter & Levi's. Also Neosporin & marshmallows. That was years ago -Any recommendations for now?

My hubby is looking at getting a job in Fayetteville, Arkansas. We are from Long Island, NY. What are we expecting when we move with a small toddler to the area? We like art, quilting, good food & the outdoors.