r/BJJWomen

Hey all,

This is really stupid but i really want to rant about it and i know i probably need to get over myself but it sucks for me and is bothering me😅

A chic came in for trial class and i was being friendly the whole time and i was talking to her about stuff and i asked her if this was her first time doing bjj , have you done a martial arts before and she was like yeah first time and i did karate for a bit when i was 8 but thats her only experience

I have spent 6 months working really hard to get my first stripe on my white bely and i was so happy about it but after today i dont feel like i deserve it

When we were doing rolls the professor gave us a drill for the roll he said no submissions just keep the person in your guard and if you get out go into side control and reset .the trial girl got out of my guard , i wasnt able to get her back in and she got into side control

Its been really bothering me and again i feel like o dont deserve my first stripe, the professor doesnt give out stripes easily either so i feel like i suck 😅

Does this normally happen ?

I know shouldnt be this upset about it 🙃

Has anyone had issues with buying items online from Alchemize Fightwear? I have always had nothing but great experiences with them, but after this last one, I think I’m done ordering from them.

I placed an order last month (4/8) and received an email confirmation, but tracking had never come through. I honestly had forgotten that I ordered anything for a second, but then realized how much time had passed and decided to reach out. I emailed them to follow up on 4/25, and they replied on 4/26 with tracking from info@alchemizefightwear.com. However, the USPS only had displayed that the label was created. But whatever, I gave it a few more days in case my order somehow had fallen through. 5/6 comes around, and still no update to the tracking, so I emailed them again. They replied with the generic email on how to track your order, but never answered my actual question. I emailed them again on 5/7, no response. Then again on 5/13 with a screenshot of the tracking they had provided me for USPS, proving that there was no movement on my shipment. Then, miraculously, I get an email on Monday (5/18) that my order is out for delivery.

So, I received my package, but only 1/2 my order was fulfilled (if you want to call it that). At that, the size I ordered (Large Rashguard) was more like a youth large. I have ordered nothing but large rashguards/singlets from Alchemize and I know how they’re supposed to fit. But this one is just not the right size. So, I sent them another email on the same day with my concern, and we are now on Thursday and there is still no response from them. Just curious if anyone has had a similar experience with them. I think I am done with Alchemize Fightwear.

[supprimé]

La domanda principale è cosa faccio per prendere la schiena dalla posizione di bottom sprawl, lo stamperò, tipo ci sono quasi ma non del tutto, come vedo la schiena penso di dover solo ruotare di più le gambe verso l'altra persona, perché scivolavano sempre via penso di non essermi girato abbastanza, sì sono lo stesso ragazzo dell'altro post se l'hai visto, sono solo 5 mesi e non ho avuto la possibilità di esercitarmi, quindi ho deciso di farlo con qualcuno di leggero, hai qualche consiglio su come prendere la schiena da una gamba sola e come farlo dal bottom sprawl (o qualsiasi posizione migliore dal bottom sprawl)? Non ho avuto la possibilità di esercitarmi, quindi ho dovuto farlo a memoria da YT lol, sii gentile, NON sono fiero dell'altro post 😂 se hai qualche consiglio dimmelo
I always try to be technical, like dude anything goes if it helps its appreciated
Idk if it matters but I’m lanky and tall (181 cm with a 185-187 cm reach) with good cardio

I very recently joined a bjj gym for the first time i decided to get the year plan because i enjoyed the trial class so much and i loved that they provided a womens only class the trial had 3 of us including the instructor which i really liked because of my nerves.but now im left thinking what if every class only has a few women in the class i want to be able to learn with a full class of women.i dont know what i should do if every class only has 2 or 3 people in it.

hai im located in Surrey, BC. I’ve been training for almost a year, twice a week. (15 y.o female, white belt one stripe) I have free time in my hands and wouldn’t mind having someone to roll/share training experiences with since I do it as a part of my hobby. Summer is coming up and I will have a bunch of time to spare for jiu jitsu.

I recently joined a gym in my area. They teach classes every day working on a technique or move and how to defend against it.

They haven't taught me any of the basic things, so right now I sort of maybe know what a butterfly is. And sitting on someone means mount. And they were working on the imanari roll last class.

Is this normal? Ive been to about 3 classes and I just feel like I have no foundation to build upon. If this is normal for gyms, I'll keep at it. I just didn't know if I should speak to someone about maybe learning some basics before attempting to leg lock someone.

I hope this doesn’t come across as vapid but I’ve been doing bjj for 3 months and it kind of bothers me how it has been negatively impacting my looks. To be clear I don’t care what I look like on the mats but I wish it didn’t follow me into my regular life. I’m sure these things aren’t foreign to anyone here but it’s the:

• snapped hair around my face from braids/high ponytails/accidental catches
• dry skin and hair from frequent washing (to avoid the dreaded ringworm and to get other people’s sweat off me)
• busted cuticles, regular nail polish rubbing off the second I touch the mats but having to trim my nails too frequently for a gel manicure to be worth it
• Bruises everywhere

Am I alone in this feeling? Anyone have tips that have really helped them with some of these things?

Hi all,
I’m interested in starting BJJ but had a few questions..

I’m 18, 5’2 and 100 lbs give or take. I’ve been an equestrian my whole life so I have good core and leg strength. Do I need to gain weight? Am I too old to start?How do I start? I have a nexplanon implant in my arm, can I not do such a physical sport with that? Where do I even start? Any sort of advice like that would be a help. I’m scared to even start because I have no idea of like, anything. Any basic comments or dms for help would be much appreciated

I’ve been in BJJ for 1.5 years and I have always had long hair In the sport. It’s long and fine but I have a lot of it (thank goodness) but it continues to constantly get ripped out from the back and front… I get it that people aren’t concerned about my hair nor do I want them to be but any suggestions on a braid or something that will help hold the back/top back from being annihilated???? I have had low tight bun, super high ponytail with braided bun and none of them seem to keep it from being a ripped out rats nest. I’d love to just cut it but I hate it short. Any long haired girls with advice please help a sister out!!! I love BJJ but I don’t think I can afford more hair loss🥺

I’m one of the only women in my gym. It‘s fine with me, the guys are great and I‘m not a petite or shy female so it’s competitive. I’m a 3-stripe white belt, been training 4x/week for a year now. Good rapport with head coach. I’m also pregnant (just entering second trimester). Have been transparent with coach and training partners about it, made proper modifications, but still training on my regular schedule and doing the work.

Today was a surprise promotion day. It always happens at the end of the regular class and before open mat, and all during regular class coach had been sneaking me belts to hide in my gi like a clown car to surprise people when we sat down to it. It was funny and I was happy to help.

Promotions going, me helping distribute belts, people getting stripes, hooray. And then… it’s over, and I didn’t get my stripe despite many people being surprised (me included). Whatever, bummer, but stripes are stripes and it’s fine.

Later, while sitting on the side with coach and a few other people, someone commented about me not getting a stripe. Coach said, “you have 4 stripes don’t you?” I said no, only three, and he said “oh well you’re about to be out of commission for a while so you’ll have to earn that when you get back.” I’m 99% sure he was trying to make a (bad) joke and actually forgot to give me a stripe because I was busy helping with belts and somehow he thought I already had 4 (he’s a little scatterbrained, separate conversation), but WHATEVER THE REASON, the whole *no stripe for pregnancy* insinuation really hurt my feelings.

It‘s one of those situations where I wish I could go back and say something in the moment but at the time I was so shocked I was mute and then he moved on to the next thing. The two upper belts sitting next to me at the time had genuine “what the fucks” after he left.

Anyway. No real point to this except my feelings are hurt and I’m trying to just shrug it off and focus on training instead of stripes. But it sure stings.

The title is kinda it. I’m so sweaty and I need tips on how to deal with it. I am on lexapro, but switching medications is off the table right now.

Yesterday was no gi open mat and I skipped a round and then looked down at where I was sitting and it was like a liter of water around just where I was sitting.

I feel like when I do no gi I’m a little cooler, but I have no fabric to catch the sweat and I’m just sliming all over the place. At least with gi class I have a damp gi but I’m not dripping on the mat. But with the gi I have to wear a 1. sports bra, 2. a rash guard, 3. A gi. And it’s just so much fabric but I’ve got big ol’ yids and I feel weird just doing a sports bra with no top under the gi

Does anyone have any recommendations for rash guard fabric that’s more moisture wicking, or companies that make light weight gis? Should I be drinking more water? Less water? Eating some special kind of arugula? Save me please 🙏

Guy here. Figured I’d post here since there’s more longer haired people here. My hair is long enough where the bangs reach below my chin but it’s not quite long enough in the bottom where I can tie the whole thing. It’s crazy wavy so even when I’m not sweating it’s really annoying during rolls. What’s the best way to keep it from going all over the place?

Hey guys, so I really don't know what to do. I started training BJJ around June of 2025, March of this year I met this guy in one of the classes and we started talking and dating. Yet, we're most likely gonna break up and it's messy. Were really just breaking up because of miscommunication and distrust, yet what im concerned about is regularly seeing him in training. Has anyone had an experience like this? Im so scared to go to class now, I used to love love love BJJ but now im kinda starting to hate it, what do I do?
Edit- i probably should’ve mentioned im 18 years old 😅

There must be some kind of pattern with 10th planet.

Varela..

Shye lilly bullying..

Now this? I feel coaches if not parents should help isntill good sportsmanship rather this.

https://www.facebook.com/share/r/1DXq3d5wCE/

Hi all, I’m a 24 year old female blue belt. I’ve been training for about 2.5 years. I have zero grappling background. I am not a professional athlete. I have a job. I try to train 4x a week, lift 2x a week. I’m intentional about game planning and working problem areas, and want to be as good as a hobbyist possibly can be. Long term, I’d like to coach or something someday. I’ve competed 7 or 8 times and plan to compete once a month over the next 6 months.

I’ve had consistently the most bizarre matchups in tournament setting, even when I a white belt. If it’s a normal person, they are 40 lbs heavier but the only other woman so I have to compete up. A lot of the time, I’m competing against 16 year olds who are ranked nationally and have been training for like 9 years. Other times, I’ve went against a girl who’s been doing competitive sambo since childhood, some actively wrestling in high school or college, girls ranked in judo or with longer term MMA backgrounds. It’s became ridiculous. I had another comp this weekend where I was supposed to have a big bracket, then all the girls dropped out, and it was me and a 15 year old who’s one of these high level kids I was talking about. When I told my coach he burst out laughing and said I have the worst luck of anyone he’s seen, and that he’s sorry, but that it’s what makes me tough and eventually I will be “that guy”. Even though I lost, I feel that I did put up a good fight, it wasn’t like an instant five second submission. But I could’ve been meaner, and that’s the issue.

It’s honestly I think has all made me worse at competing and I’ve started to get extremely anxious going into competition. In the past, I’ve competed like every 3-4 months. I start spiraling and I feel like it’s proof that I’m failing if I lose. On the very rare occasion I go against a normal person, I have a dominant win. But my record is abysmal, I have 8 wins right now. There have been times this has put such a bad drain on my confidence that I’ve lost matches I shouldn’t - typically, against girls less skilled but WAY bigger than me. There’s a local girl who’s an experienced competitor who should technically be a very back and forth round with me, and the last time I competed against her I basically deflated. My coach has said competing a lot will make it normal for me and give me a ton of matches, so the wins will boost my confidence. But I don’t get many matches and they’re definitely not confidence boosting. Am I just cooked? How can I even begin to fix this? Whether it’s bringing back more fiesty competitive energy, or how to put up better fights against these really good people.

Hi, I'm sure some of you will not like what I'm about to say. If that's the case, please head over to the regular bjj sub where you can be among other men.

This is a women's sub.

I am thankful for the men whose opinions are worded thoughtfully. I am also thankful for the men who have taken the time to add their flair designating their username as a guy (if you haven't, please do that). But when I feel like I don't even want to come here anymore BECAUSE of the sheer number of men commenting, adding their takes on things, etc, that's a problem. I know I'm not alone either.

Respectfully, men as a whole struggle with not feeling like they are the center of something. You are not the focus here. You dominate this sport as is. Please let us have our space. Glance through existing comments and if you see multiple other men have commented already, take that as your cue that maybe yet another male opinion isn't necessary. Let the male voice go unspoken. This is literally where women in this sport come to discuss amongst other women. It's the whole point.

Building a martial arts school management software and want to get this right. We handle belt promotions well for Karate and Taekwondo because those systems are more standardized. BJJ is different and I know it. Before I build anything I want to understand how your gym actually runs promotions. How does your professor track readiness? Is it mat hours? Stripe checkpoints? Competition results? Instructor gut feeling? All of the above? If you could design the perfect digital promotion tracker for your gym what would it actually need to capture?