r/ConvertingtoJudaism

I was raised loosely Christian, and have felt like I align more with Judaism for about 6 years now. I actually tried to lean into Christianity more in an attempt to feel more secure in my religious beliefs, and it just did not feel right. I do believe that I want to convert to Judaism. I find that my beliefs are much more aligned with Judaism, and there are many Christian beliefs that I do not believe in myself. I have started watching services livestreamed from my local congregation, and I have really enjoyed them; they felt much more correct for me than Christian services I have attended in the past.

That being said, I am struggling to start converting. I want to do it formally and work with my local rabbi, but I am very worried. I do not consider myself to be a Zionist, and I am very, very against what is happening right now. I have tried to dive deep into researching the history of Israel/Palestine, and it is very confusing. I believe that the Jewish people have the right to live in the area, and I believe the Palestinian people have the right to live in the area as well. I think everyone has the right to live everywhere and not be hated or seen as less-than.

I am worried that I will be judged or even not welcomed to convert due to my lack of belief in a nation-state. I believe that Judaism is a fairly welcoming religion in its beliefs, and that a Jewish state goes against my belief that everyone should be welcomed everywhere.

I would love to hear everyone's thoughts on my comments, my struggles, or your own advice. I am still learning and am struggling to have productive conversations in my personal life due to some of my loved ones (I think unknowingly having) underlying anti-Semitic thought processes.

Hello all, and thank you for reading this post.

I am a 25M from Brazil, with European and Middle Eastern ancestry. Since my teenage years, I was very curious about my upbringing and family culture. For reference, my paternal grandmother's father (non-muslim) came from the Ottoman Empire to Brazil in the 1920's, while my mom's ancestors are German and Italians.

In 2021, I got a genetic test from my family as a birthday gift, the provider company being Genera (I think it is the largest of its kind here in Brazil). This genetic test revealed that I have 8% Sephardic and 7% Ashkenazi Jewish. Since then, I have been going after stories, documents and whatever other resources I could find to track this ancestry down. My mother also took the test and she has no Ashkenazi ancestry (but does have Sephardic), so it comes from my paternal side.

Anyway, this has stuck with me since 2021 and, since last year, I reached out to one of my city's synagogues (reform Jewish) and found out that they have a course called Shorashim, that has the goal of providing education on Jewish culture and customs, both for people who want to convert for whatever reason and for those genuinely interested. I talked to the rabbi and even participated in the Hannukah lecture but, ultimately, I did not move forward with the course.

The reason for that is because I have a good friend who is Jewish and holds all customs and rites with his family. During this year's Passover, he invited me and my girlfriend to his family's Seder and it was a great time, where I got to understand and feel, in practical terms, what it is like to be in this environment. And, honestly, it felt amazing. Not only because of the warm welcome we got from all of his family and family friends, but also because of the cozy food, the meaning and stories about freedom and endurance... but, in the end, as I heard his family talk about celebrating Passover with their grandmothers, cooking gefilte fish since they were kids and just really living all of that since basically always, I couldn't help but feel like I was being an intruder to someone else's culture and traditions, as I obviously had never done any of that before.

Actually, this feeling of not belonging is exactly why I didn't move forward with the Shorashim course. When I attended, I noticed that most of the students were there for very clear, immediate reasons, like preparing for marriage with a Jewish partner. I felt like I wasn't on the same "vibe," and out of respect for their space, I thought it would be better to keep researching my genealogy and reading on my own before embarking on a formal journey, so I wouldn't feel like a fraud or an intruder.

My friend's family is Ashkenazi and mostly secular/agnostic, yet very deeply connected to their Jewish identity. The Seder was beautiful, they even handed us a Haggadah to follow along, kept the prayers brief, and focused heavily on the values of community, fighting for human rights, and historical resistance. The food was fantastic (I really loved the fried gefilte fish with chrein and the kneidlach), and I felt a profound connection to the values being discussed at that table.

However, because my ancestors had their Jewish identity silenced or lost generations ago, I have a deep fear that stepping further into this culture means I am appropriating something that isn't mine to claim. I want to honor my roots, but I am terrified of offending people who actually grew up living this culture by trying to insert myself into it.

I would love to get some input from this community regarding these feelings:

To the converts: How did you deal with this "imposter syndrome"? How do you reconcile the fact that you don't have those childhood memories or family traditions with the process of building your Jewish identity now?

To the born Jews: How do you perceive someone in my position, someone with distant, recently discovered ancestry trying to reconnect or even convert? Does it feel like cultural appropriation, or do you view it as a legitimate return?

Thank you all so much for your time and guidance :)

You can, as a normal person, live a perfectly ideal life. You will end up in the world to come. Conversion just isn't right for 99.99% of people and that's ok.

If a home has experience with this and would be willing to chat, pls message me!

Judaism is all about asking questions, but sometimes it might feel a bit much to make a whole post just for one question. Please keep it about Judaism and generally stick to the rules, but otherwise, no question is too small or silly here!

So for context, I’m 17, starting college this September. I’m patrilineal but was not raised Jewish, and I want to be orthodox so that’s not really useful anyway. I‘ve been seriously interested in converting for about 3 years now. I know I can’t convert at 17 and I’ll have to wait until I’m 18, but would it be worth contacting a local orthodox synagogue to attend some services just so I can get a feel for what it’s like beforehand? I also joined my school‘s Hillel because as I said I’m patrilineal and thought it would be a good opportunity to learn about Judaism even if it’s not specifically Orthodox Judaism. For context, I’m in Seattle, so any recommendations of orthodox synagogues that may be open to doing conversions would be great too. Sorry if this is a lot lol.

What are the official Beit Dins of both movements? If you converting Reform or Conservative, what Beit Din did you attend?

Why? What makes you a Jew? (I am jewcurious with patrilineal jewish and curious heritage)

What is the most convincing part for you?

Hello Jews of Reddit. First time poster, longtime reader here. I've had a very difficult situation arrive in the past year and am looking for some advice. Also sorry for the double post in r/Jewish

I am a 26 y/o M, always believed myself to be halachically Jewish through my mother. Did not grow up religious but have always been "culturally" Jewish and have gotten more observant in my 20s; started keeping kosher and shabbos (for the most part), regularly going to shul, being involved in trad/modox community.

Here's the backstory:

My maternal Grandmother (Z"L) was adopted as an infant by an orthodox family in the 1930s. She went to an Orthodox day school and grew up SK/SS, so we assume that she had a halachic conversion at birth. My Grandmother went nearly her entire life with no knowledge of her biological parents. About 9 months ago, shortly before she passed away, my Grandma decided to do a 23 & Me. The results showed that one of her biological parents was likely not Jewish. This made me worried and I decided to talk to my Chabad rabbi about it.

He advised me to undergo a Giyur Lechumra, of course with a Chabad BD. This is mostly because we do not have any record of her possible conversion and are unable to find her ketubah from her wedding to my Grandfather. I was devastated upon hearing this news. The last few months have been very painful in regards to my Jewish identity. I feel like I am stuck in limbo and have experienced total whiplash to my sense of self. That said, it is important for me to get this sorted out for myself and also future children, wife, etc.

The toughest part about this is hearing that this could be a year or 2 long process. I am worried about having to change in ways that are inauthentic to my observance levels just to be officially accepted as Jewish. I also am not Chabad nor do I intend to live as a Chabadnik, and I worry that their standards for a Giyur Lechumra may just be far out of my comfort zone based on some of the conversations with my Rabbi.

Through all of this, I am left feeling sad, lonely, and not Jewish enough. I suddenly feel unsure of my identity. I wouldn't wish these feelings on anyone. I feel a lack of empathy and understanding from those I have sought help from. I'm trying to do the right thing, but am just feeling so empty and sad.

Has anyone gone through a similar situation? Any advice? Does anyone know of perhaps a more liberal Modox Rabbi who may have a different opinion? Frankly, I'd like to get this taken care of as quickly as possible. I am feeling like Chabad is simply not a good fit for me in this process. I miss enjoying Judaism and I am tired of feeling like I have to prove something in order to confirm the identity I've always had.

TLDR; Going through a Giyur Lechumra sponsored by Chabad. I am not Chabad and am realizing early on in the process that it's not a good fit. I'd like to get it resolved as quickly as possible in an Orthodox framework. Has all been a very difficult and emotional process, suddenly feel not Jewish enough, unsure of identity and where to turn.

Hello everyone, how are you guys doing? So, i’m 18 and i want to covert to Judaism, i know what you guys gonna think, that i dont know what im talking about, that is difficult and that i do not need to covert to be closer to HaShem but just keep the 7 Nohaide laws. Well, for me its something special, that i can’t really explain, more like a need to live peacefully and something that i really wanna do although its not simple, but im not looking for anything simple. I live in Switzerland, ticino and we have a synagogue. i would like to covert, but in February i will start my journey in the military, since the service is mandatory, but i would like to become a professional one or work in the police. The matter is that i really don’t know how to manage the work and the conversion. I know that switzerland and the military are really supportive about cults and things like that

Hi I don’t know if there’s any rabbis on this thread to answer this question. My friend converted orthodox in Israel under the Rabbanut but was told it’s not accepted by all communities (apparently the UK & Netherlands and I think the São Paulo community in Brazil also doesn’t from what she’s heard)… does anyone know about this? Also are RCA conversions accepted worldwide or not? Thank you.

For many years, I have been drawn to Judaism in a way. I can’t explain. I wasn’t raised in a religious home and my family celebrated Christian holidays because that’s what people in the United States do. Not because they had any religious significance for them.

I’ve been very interested in conversion for many years, but because of being in the military and moving so frequently, I was never in a place where I could really attempt it.

For anyone with information on conversion, what would be the best way to start?

Any advice?

Rhetoric has a price.

We had a security incident at my shul tonight. Everyone is ok aside from a relatively minor injury when the attacker struck an older woman and she suffered a cut during her fall. Our security quickly subdued the attacker.

Our light will not be dimmed.

Am Yisrael Chai.

A picture of our shul's Shabbat silver candlesticks on a wooden table, lit for Shabbat. In the background is red carpet and ornate wall decorations.

Hello everyone,

I’m a 27-year-old woman, and for about the past two years, I’ve been deeply drawn to Judaism. It’s a feeling that’s hard to put into words, but I feel a strong pull toward the religion and the Jewish way of life, which I truly want to live.

Unfortunately, I live in a place with absolutely no Jewish community, and relocating is not an option for me at the moment. Because of the distance to the nearest community and the fact that my partner is Catholic (we are in an interfaith relationship), I am specifically looking into Reform Judaism for my conversion.

I would love to attend Kabbalat Shabbat or a Saturday Shacharit service. However, I’m hitting a wall—I am not getting any replies to my emails, texts, or phone calls from the nearest communities. On top of that, I am on the autism spectrum, which makes initiating contact and navigating these social hurdles even more difficult and anxiety-inducing for me.

I really want to start celebrating the holidays at home—especially Shabbat. I want to light the candles and host the Friday night dinner. However, I am completely lost when it comes to the rituals. I struggle to find the correct texts for the prayers and blessings, and I don't know how these ceremonies are supposed to look in practice. To make matters worse, there is a severe lack of resources here, and I cannot find a Siddur translated into my native language.

I really need some advice. Where do I even begin? How can I effectively reach out to a community under these circumstances, and how can I start practicing at home when I lack the proper books and guides?

Thank you so much for any guidance.

I am just wonering, i am a reform jew convert, and i have seen content online from ultra orthodox jews speaking about reform jew converts as not jewish, is this true, i keep kosher and shabbat, pray multiple times a day, read talmuf and tanakh constantly, and converted under a rabbu, yet im not a jew?

Hello everyone, I'm very into judaism, and I'm seriously considering converting to Judaism. Although I like all forms of it, I'd like to go with reform conversion. But there's a but. In my city, and the whole country, there are very little synagogues, and those that are are orthodox synagogues. In my city the synagogue is Sephardic, so basically it is orthodox.
I don't mind converting to Orthodox judaism, but later on, I'd like to move countries and probably join a reform community.

My question would be: Would my orthodox conversion be valid, and would I still be considered Jewish to the orthodox jews?

I'm not 100% theist, I want to be part of the Jewish people and follow the traditions, but I'm uncertain about existance of Gd, could I still go to Orthodox conversion?

Hello!

This is my second time posting in this forum, but I have come across a bit of an issue in my journey with Judaism. I am located in a city in Australia far away from literally everywhere, and a near-nonexistant Jewish community. I am 18M still living with a parent, and not in a position where moving out is an option yet. I have applied to study in a university in Melbourne, which has a much larger Jewish community and am hoping that I get accepted and move there to study, then I can connect with a proper Jewish community.

But in my current position, I don't know what to do, there are only three synagogues (one reform, one orthodox and one chabad house) in my city but they are very far away from where I live, and I HAVE reached out to one of them (the reform one) and spoken to a Rabbi. But I seriously do not know what to do with myself, and I put "conversion" in quotes because I have not even started it yet, 90% of all my connection to Judaism has been through the internet.

Is there something I can do besides wait for now and hope I get into Melbourne?

PS. I am a bit uncertain about what branch of Judaism I would follow, I think I might be more liberal, although I am a bit curious about the Orthodox movement, but am a bit scared of reaching out or that it might be too conservative for me.

Edit: pardon if the above sounded needlessly complicating, I think I might have a bit of internalised sectarianism as an ex-christian.

Hello everyonee. So as the title suggests, I'm in an interfaith relationship, as of 10 months, and while im jewish (I have not yet converted, but im being guided towards conservative judaism by my rabbi), my partner is not. Not religiously, not ethnically. He is religious, but he is not a part of judaism. Now, as much as I know about conservative judaism, some rabbis will go through performing an interfaith wedding, but some will not, im assuming? Im not too educated when it comes to wedding topics regarding judaism or any other religion. So can someone that is educated let me know whether this type of situation depends on the rabbi, the area im in, or does conservative judaism not approve of interfaith relationships? Thanks in advance ♡.

Edit: I have read all of the comments everyone provided me with, and im very grateful and thankful for everyone that interacted with the post, to give me as much insight as possible. So I wanted to answer some questions and reply to some common things I have read.

1. I do not want kids, and I dont plan on having any kids. Im in my 20's, and have been thinking about this for a while to not have any. However, if I did have them, I would not mind them being raised by their fathers religion or mine. I grew up in an interfaith household, and I was raised mostly christian, but was encouraged to know about judaism.

2. I am aware that im not yet religiously jewish, but im still ethnically jewish. I have talked to my rabbi about conversion some time ago, and he wants me to really be serious about, hence why im waiting and educating myself, till he sees that im persistent about judaism.

3. My partner is extremely supportive, and is encouraging me to proceed with my conversion. We have our talks regarding religion where we both talk about our religions, and its a way to educate one another and get closer, making our bond stronger. I of course, do not want to enter a marriage right now, there needs to be more time inbetween that, just a question so I know for the future. He knows a lot about judaism. I have been practicing judaism since the age of 16.

4. My partner knows what he is getting himself into, what judaism preaches and I really see that he is interested in supporting my identity, helping me grow, and I truly want to reach that goal of conversion as fast as possible (it should be in about a year or 2).