r/TubiTreasures

I laughed so much at this nonsense movie, and not because it’s a comedy, but because it’s a massive eye-roll in movie form. It’s one of the most 2010-looking movies I’ve ever seen, and I’m not going to spoil the twist(?), because the trailer does that for us. Also, these girls are supposed to be seniors in high school, but some of their classmates look 14 and some look 26, so I often thought they were either in college or maybe some sort of mixed-education group. If you wished The Parent Trap were dumber and dipped into mythology and also talked a LOT about Shakespeare, well, here you go. Trailer below.

[*At Close Range*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/At\_Close\_Range) is an independent rural neo-noir film directed by James Foley on a screenplay by Nicholas Kazan, who based it on the actual events of the [notorious Johnston gang](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bruce\_Johnston\_(criminal)) in the Amish countryside of southeastern Pennsylvania.

The Johnston gang, founded and led by Bruce Johnston Sr., operated primarily out of Chester County. They also committed crimes in neighboring Lancaster County and crossed state lines into Maryland and Delaware. They primarily focused in the theft of jewelry, cash, farm equipment and lawnmowers, sports equipment, and antiques and automobiles from country estates that they would sell for profit.

In the late 1970s, the gang committed several murders whose victims included Jimmy Johnston, one of two sons of Bruce Sr., and Robin Miller, the girlfriend of Bruce's other son, Bruce Jr. The gang was rounded up in 1978 when Bruce Jr. testified against his father and his associates in court.

A newspaper article on the story made its way to film producer Elliott Lewitt, who was attracted to the complicated relationships between the family and the descent into violence in a bucolic American town. Lewitt partnered with Nicholas Kazan to adapt the story into a screenplay, and Kazan sought to capture the negative forces that tore the family apart. Foley recieved word of Kazan's script in 1980, and was eager to make the film a reality.

The film would change the name of the family to the Whitewoods, with the father, Big Brad, played by Christopher Walken. Sean Penn and his younger brother Christopher were cast as Little Brad and Tommy, the sons of Walken's character. Mary Stuart Masterson was cast as Terry, the tragic love interest of Little Brad.

Sean Penn had gotten in contact with the script through musician Bruce Springsteen, who had been approached by producer Elliott Lewitt to provide music for the film. Penn had been engaged to one of Springsteen's sisters at the time.

The overall story of the Johnston's gang's crimes stealing farm equipment, and the story's Amish Pennsylvania setting would remain the same.

The film was shot entirely on location in the state of Tennessee during the summer of 1985 in the cities of Franklin and Spring Hill, located south of Nashville.

In short, if you want to see one of the best performances by Walken and Penn, this film is for you. Walken captures the essence of evil almost perfectly and Penn's portrayal as a young son getting into something he doesn't understand the shear amount of evil is behind is incredible. Legit one of the most tragic films I've watched.

[Additional information on the film's production and referenced material provided by the AFI](https://catalog.afi.com/Film/57257-AT-CLOSERANGE?sid=3946adc6-ef7a-424b-8009-acf0b6cb96f4&sr=11.438162&cp=1&pos=0).

Intro: https://youtu.be/EqXDC-\_6Kj0?si=T38ycOXIrlfLSQyr

Reilly O'Reilly is a drunken idiot who becomes a paraplegic after being run over by a drunk driver. After becoming rich in a lawsuit he moves into a mansion in a gated community with his girlfriend and his dysfunctional disabled friends.

Created by John Callahan, a quadriplegic cartoonist who tackles topics of disabilities, addiction, sex, religion, alcoholism, social workers etc. Based on John Callahan's experiences and animated entirely using Flash animation.

First debuted on Teletoon at Night in Canada. Airing on the same Friday night timeslot with Undergrads, The Oblongs, Clone High, and Mission Hill.

Terri Hawkes, the 90s English voice actress for Sailor Moon was the voice of Reilly's girlfriend Franny. Hearing the voice of Sailor Moon make sex noises in different episodes blew my 13 year old boy brain.

Episode 1: https://youtu.be/zcILZcHwuRU?si=QWU2lFPUT3apFZiu Or just watch it on YouTube.

Teletoon promo 1: https://youtu.be/JInqzp0Xurw?si=R0zlC0NzyXEDFxd9

Teletoon promo 2: https://youtu.be/sAdTSruKDGk?si=32fkEpG6D7AtE8Ub

https://tubitv.com/movies/100032351/the-gods-of-times-square

Incredible fly on the wall documentary filmed by Richard Sandler, a NY-based street photographer, his instagram is here: https://www.instagram.com/ohstop1946/?hl=en-gb . It's set during the late 90s, I believe after the clean up of times square, where Richard goes around interviewing various religious factions that persist and preach on the streets.

One of my favourite documentaries and I think under-seen.

All right men: stand by tactical trampolines, ready weighted baseballs, and dig in for some macaroni combat!

A colorful squad of American commandos sneaks behind enemy lines to steal German battle plans from a heavily guarded villa. The plot bogs down quite a bit, but the action scenes are all goofy Italian fun. Plus, Klaus by-God Kinski is in this as the suitably-evil SS Colonel.

Ten times. I’ve seen this ten times. Let me explain. 

The film is an icon in the horrendous animated Christmas movie cannon. And it deserves that place. Let me explain the plot completely from memory. 

Santa Claus was once a pirate who stole toys and his brother Dingle regularly tried to one-up him. After getting frozen in ice, Santa and Dingle wind up in the North Pole where a bunch of elves are waiting for a savior. Santa becomes Santa and Dingle becomes a mooch. Then Dingle tries to take control of the elves, first through a botched, cheated game of elf bowling, then by blowing up Santa’s toy shop. The elves go on strike and through hypnotism are made slaves of Dingle on the island of Fiji. Santa takes back the elves through a successful game of elf bowling and Christmas is saved. 

One thing that’s interesting is the writer of the film is Martin Olson. Olson is a comedy writer who wrote jokes for Penn and Teller, convinced Stephen Hillenberg to adapt “the Intertidal Zone” into “Spongebob”, and has written on a variety of cartoons like “Phineas and Ferb”, “Rocko’s Modern Life”, and “The Twisted Tales of Fritz the Cat”. He’s also an actor who appeared as the chief of the International Justice League of Super Acquaintances (a subsidiary of Viacom) and as Hunsen Abadear from “Adventure Time” where his real-life daughter Olivia Olson played his on-screen daughter Marcelene. 

The film also has some good voices behind it. You’ve got Tom Kenny (Spongebob, Ice King) as Dingle and the Hip-Hoppin elf Wrapple (it’s as bad as Mudflap and Skids), you’ve got Jill Talley (Karen the Computer Wife) as Santa’s wife Grizelda and Dingle’s femme fatale Veronica, and the late, great Looney Tunes voice actor Joe Alaskey as Santa (Santa Maria Clausewitz Kringle). Tom Kenny had nothing but nice things to say about the making of the film, even saying that he recorded his lines in a rundown apartment building in a sketchy neighborhood of LA. 

I think the reason I and many others come back is because of the out of pocket things which happen in the film. One of the first things Santa says is, “Who pooped in the peanut barrel?” There are also forgettable songs, except one where Dingle sings about the wonders of slavery. There are also jokes referencing body shots, a scene where a mob-penguin says “ay boss look I can do your mom”, Dingle says the line “keep that hot strudel in your pants” to a horny Santa, Veronica won’t let Dingle date her without “medical records”, an Easter Island statue gawks at a seductive “fire spirit” and says “awesome booty”, and when the elves wake up from hypnotism, one says “huh, how come my underwear’s on backwards”. This humor makes the film flipflop between being so-bad-it’s good, genuinely bad, and somewhat funny, that it’s a fascinating watch. 

The film also features a glowing orb which basically does anything the story needs it to do. It can melt ice, rebuild a toyshop, and any inconvenience is due to it “being on the blink again”. 

Please watch this one for X-mas or any time of year. Your family may abandon you, but you will have an experience like no other. In the words of that Easter Island head “This is like a chick flick, but instead of smokin’ babes dude, it’s a munchkin and a fat guy.” I know it’s not Christmas, so treat it as an early Xmas present.

Fun fact, according to a promotional video made for investors, there was going to be a sequel set around Halloween. That never happened. They also said the film had “franchise potential”.

Sales Promo:

https://youtu.be/TzZ40xIG2qg?si=vbYDmIeQITb2NMPw

Slavery Song:

https://youtu.be/8wEZeUuoxZ0?si=q9-2ueP6lLw\_zEJQ

I really try not to comment on people’s appearance in these reviews—positive or negative. It really contributes nothing, in my opinion, to the movie, and it can come across as mean (if negative) or creepy (if positive). That being said, what is up with the main guy’s fucking face? He looks allergic, just in general. It’s crazy. It will come as no surprise that this man, Paul Sampson, also wrote, directed, produced, and did a whole bunch of other shit to this ~~vanity project~~ movie. Udo Kier is in this goddamn thing. Norman Reedus, too—surely the Walking Dead checks were coming in by this point, right?? What the fuck, guys?? In all seriousness, Paul Sampson is someone who for sure regularly Googles himself, so I will say to you, sir, this movie is actually solid on a lot of aspects, and I genuinely love the concept of a knight-ghost haunting people. I didn’t mean the thing I said earlier in a mean way, more like in a fun way. I’m bald. I look like an adult baby. It’s fun. We’re having fun. Trailer below.

For how well known he is throughout the west, it’s surprising how few people know about Jackie Chan’s earlier work as one of the top action stars of Hong Kong cinema throughout the eighties (along with his former schoolmates Sammo Hung and Yuen Biao). Most people seem to either know him from either *Rush Hour* or that one cartoon, which is a real shame since his earlier stuff is way more interesting and has WAY more action.

This movie pretty much represents Jackie at the height of his powers. It is impossible to overestimate the number of insane things that this man can do with his body here, he’s just does perfectly choreographed backflip after backflip, punch after punch… you get the idea. Here’s just one scene where he absolutely tears through the screen:

https://youtu.be/9x_EFZ73bDc?si=jYgoM19VK813sbp-

If you’re familiar with Chinese folk hero Wong Fei-hung, then you probably already know that he used to be one of the most represented subjects in Hong Kong cinema. This film pretty much takes the piss out of that legend by portraying Wong (played by Jackie) as a charismatic but mischievous Kung-fu prodigy who eventually hones his skills through training with the equally legendary master drunkard Beggar So (Yuen Siu-tien). Yuen, who died the year after this film released, is in no less impressive form here than Jackie himself and really needs to be seen to be believed.

One issue though that might even be a dealbreaker for some: Tubi only has the dubbed version of this film. Now, while I happen to think this dub is pretty decent and retains the sense of humor well, the original language is simply always better, and this one definitely has problems (the film renames Wong Fei-hung to Freddy Wong, for example).

Regardless, any way that you can watch this movie, please do. What it lacks in major action setpieces that Jackie has become known for it more than makes up for that with the *sheer volume* of electrifying stunts and martial arts performed by the whole cast.

I haven’t seen the rest of Jackie’s Hong Kong work (except for Police Story) but if any of it can top this movie then I really oughta kick myself for not watching these when I was 15.

I did the original Ginger Snaps a few months ago. Now Tubi has the the sequel and the prequel. Unfortunately not on Canadian Tubi.

Ginger Snaps Unleashed: https://youtu.be/rj7TQHjbsq8?si=2u-AT77ZGWNnXTBg

After infecting herself with her sister's werewolf virus Bridgette has been living in a motel injecting herself with monkshood to stop the transformation. After accidentally overdosing she wakes in in a rehab facility for girls and befriends a strange girl named Ghost (Tatiana Maslany). Bridgette must find a way to escape the facility before she transforms and before another werewolf gets her.

JoBlo review: https://youtu.be/wfH-So8Hdek?si=R992xhakP1fL-Ufa

Ginger: https://youtu.be/qcSj75CWseo?si=tcqSnTN51YPyyF3B Katherine Isabelle was my first horror crush.

Ghost: https://youtu.be/uwu-mpg9Wow?si=TXRFFxEdFAGleWjn

Hallway scene from the first movie: https://youtu.be/hoivE80CtKQ?si=fjfX5LAhdVD3SM\_R

Ginger Snaps Back The Beginning trailer 1: https://youtu.be/clmJQwTJ5fY?si=Uy5giN3CifINt31Q

Trailer 2: https://youtu.be/aNh9VQIueLw?si=a6ZGfpdIvwVm-0YT

In this prequel set in 1815 Canada, the Fitzgerald sisters are wandering the snowy wilderness when they find Fort Bailey, an isolated trading post under attack by werewolves

JoBlo review: https://youtu.be/3kTmfIfGTZ0?si=kvTeYxwpZ-0oXyjn

A jazz trumpeter finds the body of a fur coat clad woman washed up on a beach in Istanbul. Later on while in Rio de Janeiro, he has encounters with who he swears is the same woman, which soon becomes an obsession.

A surreal giallo that's a ghost story as well. The jazz soundtrack and psychedelic effects add to the mood and atmosphere.

Trailer: https://youtu.be/WaG1KZqrLvM?si=u3XfGlapHKBgboo3

A former soldier, a scientist, and a small team of PTSD-afflicted Marines must protect a young boy when he's targeted by a bigger and stronger genetically engineered Predator

Weaponized Autism. That is the literal plot of this movie. The Yaujta want to harvest a little boy's autistic DNA because they believe the condition is the next stage of human evolution and want his autism to upgrade their species. This is a real line said by Olivia Munn.

https://youtube.com/shorts/Mz59Gm9FPJc?si=g0RCGHFi52wupRLO

Honest Trailer: https://youtu.be/a8yhdePFEvY?si=eS8sne7FDSBEb4r3

Pitch Meeting: https://youtu.be/ofWLKm8h6sA?si=E4wnHVXAoto6yeKg

Cinema Sins: https://youtu.be/9D9zlW33GI4?si=gC0opE8fmJnO4dkJ

Autistic boy wears a Predator helmet: https://youtu.be/A3l0WVYuW2U?si=GnIG89LbHBSy0bH0

Olivia Munn meets the team: https://youtu.be/u6B6U2otx9c?si=wqPDrmHKLSJer7qi

Lab escape: https://youtu.be/UXd3vcSpZEE?si=xRXw9FJkRXWfkzgZ

Mega Predator: https://youtu.be/83TqY6VqYrk?si=sXNNNHQm2KKYHx\_Q

Sterling K Brown blows his own head off: https://www.reddit.com/r/doubletoasted/comments/1oxx9hu/found\_the\_clip\_one\_of\_the\_funniest\_deaths\_in\_the/

You shouldn’t really let that “horror” flair fool you, this film really isn’t trying to be scary and is much closer to being a comedic pastiche of old 1950s monster films like “The Blob” where most of the runtime is spent on small-town antics. However, whereas the humor in most no budget horror-comedies relies on shoving fourth-wall breaks into scenes like they’re the deus ex machina of jokewriting, “Don’t Let the Riverbeast Get You” wisely decides to go in a more irreverent and charming route. A sample joke so you have an idea:

Person A: “You’re so nonchalant over there, eating peanuts, not offering them to anybody else.”

B: “You never offered me any of your butternut squash yesterday.”

A: “One doesn’t share butternut squash. It’s too difficult to share.”

As for the actual plot, “The Greatest Tutor in New England” Neil Stuart returns to his hometown after he left in disgrace three years ago claiming that there was a “riverbeast” hiding in the nearby woods. He and soem new companions soon are hot on the trail of proving the existence of the creature.

This movie is definitely lamenting a sense of “provinciality” that doesn’t appear in modern films as they are products of a consumer society which no longer feels endeared to that idea.

A fun, cute movie if you want something a little different and can vibe with its laid back pacing and sense of humor.

This is, as the proverbs would say, my cup of tea. Absurdism—real, dedicated, profound, original absurdism—fuels me in a way that nothing else does. I think the mistake people often make with this kind of thing is that they don’t know how to package it. The ideas and intent might be there, but the container in which it resides is not. This film has a very stylish container that suits its needs. If nothing I’ve said thus far makes any sense, that’s totally fine. Things like this won’t be for everyone, but those who are on board will likely love it. Also, Ana Fabrega and Stavros Halkias are both in this, and they’re just wonderful. Trailer below.

In the Far East, the star of great power is stolen by an evil priestess. In her thirst for power, she kidnaps the jungle girl who was sent by the gods, to be used as a human sacrifice. Only Santo, the masked man of silver, can save the day.

*Sigh...* So much potential wasted. Instead of all out action and thrills, we get Santo and his sidekicks traipsing through the jungle, only to have ten minutes of Santo fighting the go-go dancing evil high priestess and her minions.

I know that time makes this impossible, but one can only imagine how much better this film would have been with "Viva del Santo!" By Southern Culture on the Skids playing during the fight scenes.

Do you remember Drexel the Dream Hemsley? Everyone remembers Drexel. The man was the undisputed king of Rock and Roll. His influence is legendary and undisputed, and his songs are immortal. 

So for context, the movie that I’m talking about is about Elvis. Elvis had a twin brother named Jesse Garson who died stillborn. The film imagines a scenario where Elvis’ twin brother survived, and after being unknowingly separated from birth, would wind up shadowing his brother as an Elvis impersonator with a heavy emphasis on the Christian faith. Of course they couldn’t use the name Elvis, so throughout the film there is this man who looks like Elvis, sings like Elvis, stars in movies similar to what Elvis was in, and he’s played by Elvis impersonator Blake Rayne. But he’s not Elvis, he’s Drexel “The Dream” Hemsley. Which is weird given the movie at one point name drops Elvis so it begs the question of how this universe operates. 

While Drexel becomes intoxicated by stardom, his twin brother Ryan is a preacher’s kid who struggles to please his father. 

Speaking of which the film is filled with actors I’m convinced were held at gunpoint to be in. The late Ray Liotta plays Ryan’s preacher father, you’ve got Ashley Judd as Ryan’s mother, Joey Pantoliano (the Matrix) and Seth Green as Ryan’s friends. 

Overall it’s not good. The plot is bumpy, the dialogue bad, and the film overall is a drudge. And while I don’t want to trash a film for having a low budget, it looks like they were operating off of scraps and a mistaken view of what the 50s-70s looked like. I would highly recommend Brad Jones's review of the film where commenting on the age of Ryan “this is the first time I’ve seen someone caught for over-aged drinking”. 

https://youtu.be/ImXzfTUCi1g?si=0\_RbzhL\_NDIwN8u2

“The Camp of Saints” is a notoriously racist novel. Written by French writer Jean Raspail, the book imagines a scenario where ships carrying refugees come to Europe, and slowly but surely destroy it. They start to overpopulate us. And because society is overpermissive and accepting, Western civilization is doomed. Despite how ludicrous the plot is, the book has gone on to inspire a following predominantly by white supremacists who think the book was somehow “prophetic”. I think the reason it has deeper roots is because the book was written by an established French author. If the book was written by your Uncle Joe on a Gateway computer from 1999, no one would care. The book is a dark vision of the world from the perspective a racist. A world where everyone who is darker-skinned and speaks a different language is coming to destroy your way of life and keep your children from having a future. 

So last night I watched “The Angry Birds Movie”. I’ll admit that the opening was a little much so before we continue I want to let you know that I don’t think the movie was referencing the book. I don’t think the film was trying to be racist and I don’t know if it’s worth seriously critiquing the film over it. If anything it’s more like a funny coincidence that a movie based on a mobile game I played when I was ten superficially reminded me of a racist book. The only similarities are that a bunch of pigs on boats come to an island of birds, and because the birds are so friendly they slowly start to crowd the island and eventually take away the bird’s eggs. I joke but the hero of the book is Red, because he’s a “racist” who immediately doesn’t trust the pigs.

The film is the story of Red (Jason Sudeikis) a bird who is often justifiably pissed off, is forced into anger management with Chuck (Josh Gad) and Bomb (Danny McBride). There’s also Terrance, we’ll get to him shortly. Meanwhile a bunch of pigs led by Leonard (Bill Hader) take advantage of the bird’s friendliness and decide to steal their eggs. 

This movie is bad, so let’s get into it. There are some good things about it. The climax which replicates the game is fun and energetic. Peter Dinklage is funny as Mighty Eagle, and he’s basically become a meme at this point. I have no idea why but the character of Terrence is the funniest character in the film. He doesn’t speak, we never know why he was put in anger management, and despite not saying a single word, he’s voiced by Sean Penn. And somehow every scene with Terrence is great. The other actors are good too, except for one. 

The weak link in the film is Jason Sudeikis. Even if Red is a relatable character, Sudeikis doesn’t make him charming or funny enough to watch. I don’t know if this is true but it feels like the crew thought, let Sudeikis say stuff, he’ll bring the funny. He’s got the occasional funny line but he doesn’t deliver to his full potential. 

There’s also the music. The music is in the camp of, “let’s choose a song which telegraphs to the audience what’s going on right now” in the vein of “Suicide Squad”. There’s a scene where Red is wandering around alone as an outcast for being an angry bird, and they play “Behind Blue Eyes” by the Who, known for the lyric “No one knows what it’s like, to be the bad guy.” Actually I lied, it’s the Limp Bizkit version. THERE IS NO GOD!!!

It’s like a more competent Illumination film, which means it’s still bad. Skip this one if you can, unless you want to see Terrence which is valid. 

Intro: https://youtu.be/7Kdsy6Fnr8s?si=XbgoyKr4vAKGPiW1

Courage is a pink timid dog living in the middle of "Nowhere" with his owners Eustace and Muriel. Every episode Courage must protect his oblivious owners from aliens, ancient cursed slabs, giant floating space heads, evil Katz, and various monsters who try to attack the farm and eat his owners. Courage is terrified of everything but he does his best to protect Eustace and Muriel.

Jordan Fringe explains the show better: https://youtu.be/vQdtV5z\_Gd8?si=JBZHnOJfhEOyzTlF

Nerdstalgic: https://youtu.be/Cf6hIyIqBUs?si=Fx-35oIem\_9nDsNI

Eustace: https://youtu.be/VQ9aiyyEB-s?si=NUs-MIQuEyKgI6Wc

Muriel: https://youtu.be/Qt-b1aconjk?si=m52pxy\_F2v3obE\_c

Freaky Fred: https://youtu.be/KDNKt0gkMCM?feature=shared

King Ramses Curse: https://youtu.be/kKnC674-ZDU?feature=shared

Bunny and Mad Dog: https://youtu.be/NwLAXhX2GoQ?si=BrhgCtwavVe8tjtF An episode so dark for a children's show that the creator is surprised that Cartoon Network allowed it to air.

Different doors: https://youtu.be/4H8BRrU48Oo?si=HLgLQ6QB-FtJ2jPn

You're not perfect: https://youtu.be/GVKA-l0P34w?si=CmpvkQGJdBQqFNf6

Trailer for the Scooby Doo Courage crossover movie: https://youtu.be/2vnTvMK3vVc?feature=shared

The story of a spaceship that crashes on an uncharted planet. The survivors find it habitual and similar to Earth, but millions of years behind in the development of life.

They must find a way to survive the hostile environment and the threat of dinosaurs.

Most of the budget was spent on special effects, which included an award-winning collection of stop-motion dinosaurs.

If you're a fan of stop-motion films, I recommend it for the dinosaurs.