r/romanceunfiltered

Edit: bruh. This is NOT a smut shaming post lol. 💀💀💀 the crux of this post is about how I think it's unnecessary and hypocritical to shame Haunting Adeline adaptation when worse potentially more problematic series are on the Frontline getting adapted and talked about by celebrities...aka. ACOTAR. that's the debate.

Tldr; I believe my main concern with ACOTAR adaptation is the same as those who critique Haunting Adeline adaptation. i.e, it will give people the idea that women love "sexually abusive men". "Or that it's okay to sexually abuse or steal their autonomy as long as it's for love"

Okay, listen before y'all burn me at the stake. Please read this with an open mind. I know not everyone loves Acotar but those who do are insanely loyal to it. So pls pls pls spare my life lol.

I have been reading up on all the critical posts from different perspectives that elaborated on why HA adaptation is something to be really really cautious about. And you know what? I get it.

But then the whole Acotar thing keeps coming up on mainstream media, with celebs talking about it. And I was like... hello?? How are we okay with this?? Isn't it just as problematic if not more because of the significantly larger fan base it will attract??

ACOTAR has become the face of romantasy, even tho 99% of romantasy series are nothing like it. A lot of them are better written, more thought provoking, with great political and social issues integrated in its plot. Yet people don't hear about them as much cuz they aren't as famous as Acotar.

So now that celebs are eager to be part of its adaptation.. I'm really concerned, like.. is it really an adaptation that should be made??

Because I will die on this hill: Rhysand and Feyre are the most toxic self absorbed example of a love story. They are narcissistic. And show sign of SEVERE VICTIM COMPLEX.

and unlike..let's take another problematic couple Zade and Addie from Haunting adeline, Nobody in their vicinity or inner circle realizes this or helps them give a reality check.

Zade and Addie are legit psychos it is mentioned countless times. Even in bonus anniversary scenes set years later, author keeps bringing up how fucked up Zade was to do what he did. And addie is to be okay with it.

Rhysand and Feyre are a FAR WORSE representation of what a love story or romance should be, especially for younger generation.

In a way they remind me of Elena and Damon from Vampire Diaries, Rory and Logan from Gilmore Girls, and Chuck and Blair from Gossip Girl.

I grew up watching these TV shows, and at the time they made me think this is what passionate love story is like. Finding a way to be together despite all your differences.

It wasn't until I rewatched them with adult eyes did I realize how insanely TOXIC AND SELFISH they were.

In their love hate game of foreplay they legit hurt so many people. Only to be together at the end but at the expense of ruining everyone else's happiness.

Feyre leaving tamlin (granted, who was a bad partner) in a heartbeat, only to move on with the guy who literally >!stripped her almost naked!< and >!drugged her without her consent! to make her dance seductively in a room full of audience!< also >!physically hurt her to leverage her into accepting his deal!< is a HORRIBLE representation. Specially if they tried implying that he "did it for her own good".. awwww 🥺💀

And then comes the excessive amount gaslighting and toxic behaviour both characters display:

1. In order to move on from her guilt, she justifies her actions of breaking up with her fiance through a note. Knowing well he doesn't know she can write. And then gets mad when he didn't take it srsly.

2. Justified wanting to leave her fiance on the alter, begging someone to make it stop, instead of just communicating like a normal person should.

3. Rhysand sending Feyra to fetch a ring while risking her life.

4. And the worsstttt chapter 54 when both began gossiping of how terrible it was of tamlin to not rescue her the night before, when the man next to you had months to that!!!

5. Not to forget the absolute chaos Feyre created in Spring Court because Godforbid her fiance didn't believe the letter his illiterate partner wrote to him.

6. Oh and I almost forgot..the stealing her autonomy bit.. in book 3. Shivers!!! 🤮🤮

Throughout their trilogy, it baffles me how easily they throw blame on everyone but themselves... like it was tamlin's fault for not rescuing you the night before, it was Lucien's fault for trying to winnow with you, it was Nesta's fault for not taking yoir duty, it was amarantha's fault for killing that neighbour girl.. (who's name rhysand gave her)

Literally these two would have blamed the couldren itself than take blame for their faults. And have a conversation like hey, we are mates, but we did hurt a lot of people while getting together.

And none of their friends had a backbone enough to confront them.

Yess what Zade does to Adeline is too fucked up for screen, but what Rhysand did to Feyre and then what they did to everyone else, is not even remotely better. Imo it's worse.

Such a delulu toxic representation that shows as long as you love the other person, you can sacrifice anyone, or treat anyone how ever you want, as long as at the end you get to be with them.

This was sooooooo common in TV shows back in 2010s.

But pls pls pls I really don't want new kids growing up watching this thinking this is the standard. Cuz it's not.

It's so fucked up.

I can't imagine how a mature adult read it and be like yeah this will be a great love story to adapt. One that teaches to jerk all responsibility and throw temper whenever you don't get what you want.

First-person POV is harder to write than third person POV and can tend to look badly written or corny, if not really well thought of.

The third-person POV is my favourite.

I don't like the word brooding. It's a dang word for poultry animals getting hormonal during egg incubation.

Enemies to lovers is overdone, and I rarely see anything well written anymore.

If there is betrayal involved, there should be a period where the person is actually mad for a good portion of the book, and redemption shouldn't be half-cassed.

The one bed trope is overcomplicating something with an easy solution.

Pictures of people on sprayed edges look tacky.

Love triangles can only truly be a love triangle if one of the people in the triangle is gay. Otherwise, it's just a dang V.

Multiple POVs are not my favourite whatsoever.

Let some guys be scrawny and short, let some girls be buff and bigger than petite and frail.

STOP THE "Not like other girls." Trope.

People should be open on reading niche books from indie writers.

Authors think of a better word for smiling than Smirk, please.

Easy books (an excuse for lazy writing)

FMCs who have to win everything in the name of feminism. Let girls lose sometimes cause it's absolutely normal.

Pretty privlage.

Last one, don't kill me, I don't like Aaron warner or kai azer.

These are my hotakes, obviously these are my opinions I respect if you like them but these are mine, feel free to LIGHT heartedly debate with me if you want and tell me your hotakes.

I’m writing a romance about a 38-year-old African-American widow (FMC) and a 27-year-old Italian-American attorney (MMC). She’s a name partner with two kids and has been widowed for five years after losing her childhood sweetheart unexpectedly. She hasn’t felt romantic interest in anyone since his death.
The MMC comes from a wealthy legal dynasty and is a newly licensed attorney. He was cheated on in a long-term relationship and became a shameless playboy afterward. Then he meets her and is immediately, unapologetically obsessed. He’s not trying to “save” her or replace her late husband. He genuinely just falls hard and wants to become part of her life. What would make this work for you as a reader, and what would make you hate it?

Have you ever noticed that, in most books with plus-size female protagonists, they’re always fat “in the right places”?

I think everyone knows what I mean: women who carry most of their weight in their thighs and butt, have very little belly fat, a small waist, and wide hips, creating that whole “I’m fat, but I’m still hot” stereotype.

And this mindset exists in real life too. Women with this kind of fat distribution are often considered more attractive because, despite being overweight, they still fit certain beauty standards.

Recently, I started reading some plus-size romances and noticed that ALL of them, and I really mean ALL of them, had this kind of body. Most of their weight was in their thighs and butt, very little in their stomach, a defined waist, and lots of curves.

And it honestly annoys me so much. 😭

I’m not saying that plus-size women can’t have these bodies. Of course they can. The problem is that it feels like, whenever authors write a plus-size heroine, they still try to keep her as close as possible to the conventional beauty standard.

It’s like she can be fat, as long as she’s fat in a way that is considered attractive.

There are so many different types of plus-size bodies, with different fat distributions, and I would love to see more heroines who actually fall outside of this standard. Because honestly, sometimes it feels like even when authors try to step outside the beauty standard, they’re still trying to sneak back into it through the back door. 😭

My close friend had always told me how much she loves Good Omens, and she usually only watches/reads Lesbian and Gay romance, so my question is, are hetero Books bad written or its just a mentality thing?

If possible i could use some examples

https://preview.redd.it/667ln8uwcwsh1.png?width=498&format=png&auto=webp&s=41b4e6c621c963073895752f093859004588d8e2

As always, on Friday the judgement free zone is closed. Please share your romance book related grievances: big and small.