Never thought I’d be here
I was married for 14 years. My ex wife (35F) and I (35M) were together for 16 yrs. Married for 14. We had 4 daughters and a son on the way. Arguing and fighting was something we were not a stranger to. But it finally became to much for me. I wanted a son so bad and was finally having one. To say I was excited is an understatement. I had a 3 day work trip that was about 3 hours away. She would FaceTime me nonstop wanting to see around my hotel room and when I was in training class to see around the instructors room. It was so aggravating and embarrassing. We both had cheated in the past and I know that made things harder on us. So when I got back from the training, I told her she had to stop and try to start building trust again. This made her doubt even more. She kept asking why I was defensive about it and one night when I had to work late, she called me and fired her .380 while on the phone to make me think she hurt herself. I ended up calling 911 to meet me at the house. I get there and they sweep the house, wake up our children, ping her phone, and find her on a back road. I told the officers I had had enough. There comes a point when staying together for the kids isn’t best for them anymore. So I packed up and moved out. She begged me to come back for a while and when she realized I was serious this time, she talked me into giving her a ride to McDonald’s one morning to get her and the kids some breakfast. I had been taking anabolic steroids for about 3 years. She knew this and knew where I kept them. On the way to McDonald’s, she txt a drug task force agent out of another county, told him she is being held against her will, that she was in fear for her life, that I had anabolic steroids and a 9mm, and that I smelled like alcohol. So he called in to the city police department and requested a welfare check. Long story….short I went to jail. Before my court date I went to see our kids and she tried to leave knowing I had to go do some side work cause her stunt to get me arrested caused me to lose my $150,000 a year job with bonuses. So to deescalate the situation I got in my truck to leave and she tries to jump in as I’m backing up. The door ricocheted back and hit her hard enough to make her stumble a little. So she cussed at me and went and got in her vehicle. When I got to court the next Wednesday over the charges from the McDonald’s event, I get arrested in court for reckless endangerment with a deadly weapon. She filed a police report and said that I drug her down the driveway with my truck and never stopped. I’m no genius but an F250 diesel dragging a 5 foot tall 129lb woman down a gravel driveway would have left a cut, scratch, bruise, broken bone, or something. But she had no injuries and even refused medical treatment. Because of this, she was able to get a restraining order. Since then she has put me in jail 3 times by lying to law enforcement. I haven’t seen my children in a year and a half. My son was born and I didn’t know it. I didn’t even know what he looked like till he was almost a year old. She would post pics on Facebook but put emojis on the picture covering him up. When I did start getting to see them, she was calling the law every weekend that I had them till she was finally able to say that I was unfit to have the children cause I left some power tools out during some home renovations, so they suspended my visitations. I don’t make alot of money, my credit is shot, I have no vehicle, I’m living with someone and I’m paying $300 every week to child support. I’m just at a loss here. Idk how to get my head back above water. Idk how to get a vehicle cause I can’t make enough to save. I can’t finance one cause my credit is ruined. I come from a poor family so there is no one that I can get a personal loan from. And I can’t stay here forever. I feel like it won’t be long and I’ll be homeless……it’s crazy to know that just because I didn’t want to be with her anymore, she could literally take everything from me, bleed me dry, and ruin my life so easily. I’m not asking for help. Advice is appreciated. But I think I’ve just accepted that this is just how it is now. I can’t get ahead enough to build back up. So if I end up losing it job cause of transportation or not having a home, then at least in jail, I’ll have 3 meals a day and a bed to sleep in.