u/Anonymous20734

I was diagnosed with autism when I was little, about 7 and about 2-3 years ago I got diagnosed with Psychosis which causes dissociations and memories that could've been made up in my head. I take medication for these problems but it doesn't mean I don't have moments of uncertainty of what's in my head and what's not.

I have days my mind just feels completely cloudy like I'm forgetting something, other days I remember clearly. Circling back to my Autism, I have days I mentally feel incapable of a lot, the added disability on top of mental issues just makes my depression worse.

I just need advice on how to cope with this day to day. I often worry about going out at all but since I feel so unfulfilled anyway it probably doesn't matter.

What should I do?

I was shopping at a store and ran into my toxic ex's mom and his sister. I confronted her about how he stole from my home and she laughed about it like it didn't affect me. It just makes my depression so much worse. Even after the experience has long been over I still feel haunted by him and his family showed no sympathy.

Even if they didn't believe me or thought it wasn't true. They still didn't care how bad it hurt me mentally. I told the people at the store that they were there and they might do similar behavior like stealing. I have no idea if anything was done about it.

I was taken advantage of (he did other stuff I'm not getting into). It hurts knowing that even his mother is just like him. No humanity, his sister laughed about it too. I just need advice and support. I've been trying to move on from the past for about 2 years and the resurfacing of emotions doesn't help at all.

I've been trying to avoid World of Warcraft. So much so I don't use a gaming laptop anymore. I'm willing to play an app game or 2 but every now then there's a new expansion with a new soundtrack, Patches and videos released.

I have moments where I can listen to the soundtrack but then I get this itch to play it or watch videos of it. Thank goodness I don't have my laptop but I don't know what to do when I'm craving it. Do I just let it crave? The game has mentally messed me up.

I was diagnosed with autism when I was about 7 and about 2 years ago got diagnosed with Psychosis/Dissociation. I've gotten bullied and taken advantage of it multiple times because of it all and it just adds fuel to my depression.

I know I'm not alone in this but it doesn't make my life any easier.

Life is just so complicated and making it through the day only upsets me more cause that means I have another 50 or something years of waking up and going back to sleep. I didn't ask for any of this. No one did.

Edit: I am on meds for my depression and my psychosis/dissociation. I have help irl but I need support besides my therapist for all these feelings. If anyone has advice or just anything to make me feel the slightest bit better that would make my days brighter.

My older sibling always asks for money from my parents, mostly taking advantage of my dad for it. I miss talking to them but they only ever talk to me because they need something, not because they miss hanging out. They have to be right about everything. There's no compromise.

I try so hard to be there for them but it's never enough. I've completely blocked them from my life. My parents vent about them a lot. So much so it makes me vent.

I feel like I've done the right thing but it's so difficult. I have a younger sibling but we just don't talk because they're more bonded with my older sibling. I just feel like I have no bond with my siblings anymore. What do I do from here?

I've had a couple relationships but one so much so the person made me feel unsafe. They mentally and physically abused me. Stole from me. Laced me and took nude pictures of me while I was sleeping.

I have had bad relationships but not as dangerous and harmful as him. The entire experience has made my gut instinct not to date and more severe in my depression. Prior to him it was just something bad. Now, I feel unsafe and don't want to be in my own body at times which just makes me have moments I want to not exist.

The worst part of it all is he held no accountability or apologized. Didn't turn himself in. I have nothing to prove it and it aches me because if I wasn't so clueless and naive about his actions, I could've done something. He would've been in prison by now. The guilt only makes me more depressed. I have other baggage about my depression but he has made it so difficult to push through everyday. I feel haunted by him.

When I was younger it felt so fulfilling. Now it feels repetitive and my existence doesn't feel worth it anymore. It all feels so pointless. Wake up, sleep, wake up and sleep.

I'm tired of waking up. I'm seeing my therapist and sure it's nice to have someone to talk about it all but even going out just feels like nothing new. I feel like I've done everything there is. I'm tired of being here, waking up here.

I desperately try to enjoy that I have this life and that I'm lucky to have it but on the other hand I wish my life was given to someone else. If I had never existed, I wouldn't have had to deal with life and this.

I have days where I hope humanity just goes extinct because I can't cope sometimes that people can be so cruel and that I share the same planet as them. A single negative experience just makes my depression more difficult. I've been stuck in this funk. I envy people that aren't here. Having an existential crisis makes me frustrated then also having near death experiences wishing it had worked.

I could've been anything else.

I just need some advice, anything to make me feel like I'm not a waste of oxygen.

I've been really bored lately. I took a detox from gaming for about a year, I only use my phone for app games. I stopped using laptops, desktops, tablets and consoles, I never used anything VR headset related. With just a phone's app store. Now no game seems to be enjoyable, even on the app store.

I'm tired of loot boxes, mystery items, passes and micro-transactions to prevent me from having a fun experience. Nothing like World of Warcraft, Fortnite, Brawl Stars. I've even tried mahjong, color by numbers and RPG games. Idle games. Survival games. Just nothing is causing a spark.

Does anyone know some good app games that aren't time consuming or push the use of micro-transactions?

I took a detox from gaming after my last relapse from world of Warcraft a year or 3 ago. I only use my phone. I don't own any consoles or desktops, laptops etc anymore. Just my phone and it's been a disappointing experience.

I love to play games but not to get addicted. I miss video games but I feel like all of them aren't as good anymore. There's no relaxing games out that don't have loot boxes, passes, micro transactions for a "better experience".

Does anyone know of some games that are relaxing but also not addictive? Ones that won't ruin my mental health and if not video games, then hobbies, other things that might bring more fun into my life.

Thank you

Trigger warning: Abuse, assault, theft

Today I ran into my ex's mom and sister. I felt like I was having a panic attack just seeing them. It just flooded back.

In the shortest words, he took advantage of me.

Mentally and physically.

Abuse/Assault: He had laced me with something and when I woke up he was taking pictures of me nude, I had clothes on originally. I looked over at his phone and he sent it to someone, making fun of my body. Only now has the memories become less cloudy.

He would gaslight me a lot, saying something like "we had sex", "I was just admiring you", gross non-consenting stuff like that.

Theft/Assault: Another experience is he had been stealing stuff from my home while I was asleep. Who knows how many times he took stuff while I was sleeping or even if it was something he laced me with.

I confronted him etc, and on the last day I ever spoke to him he showed up with a weapon in his pocket. I dropped my phone (out of panic) and he stepped on it until he could look at it. With the weapon visibility point towards me in his pocket. I pleaded and pleaded, he seemed to have no remorse.

The worst part is it's happened so long ago, I wish it was easier to move on from this but I don't even feel comfortable in my own body after the entire experience. I have days I can't even be ok that I'm sharing the same planet as him. It hurts so much.

Even after seeing his mom and sister, all that went through my head was "how can his mom be so ok with this?" After everything he did to me. Not even an apology. I confronted her about the theft and she laughed about it like it didn't impact me at all. It makes me so frustrated and depressed.

Any advice on this? Please help.

I need some advice,

I've been detoxing myself for about 2-3 years from online games and app games because nothing has been worth it.

I played World of Warcraft for 5 years then I suddenly questioned "why am I still playing this?" Then quit. I relasped once for World of Warcraft then just deleted my Blizzard account since I had enough. Gaming hasn't felt the same since quitting WoW.

I want to believe it's just burnout or that I've grown out of it but part of me misses how fun it used to be. Maybe it's a little Fear of Missing Out/FOMO, or nostalgia. Both. I think the biggest disappointment would be if the gaming industry just isn't as brilliant as it used to be, given my experience.

If anyone knows what these feelings could mean or what to do in this situation, that would be a big help. I'm incredibly conflicted with this. Thank you.

P.S. To anyone struggling with gaming addiction like I do, please delete all the games on your phone or delete the account completely, if deletion isn't available, replace the email with one you won't ever use or remember.

If anyone else is going through this, please find help,

You're not alone. Depressed people gotta stick together.

I've been feeling depressed lately, I have moments where life is too much. I keep pushing through each day but it feels more like a challenge. Sleeping seems to be the only thing I enjoy besides my dog.

I have some mental health issues and a disorder that makes life feel like it's x10 more challenging.

I've been taking medicine to help make life a little less stressful but even therapy doesn't feel like enough at times.

I often feel at ease knowing I won't be here eventually. At my life expectancy I think I'll feel more at peace than I do now.

I try to see past the nihilism and existential crisis I have. Waking up sometimes gives me fear. I feel horrible about it but I envy people that don't exist. I just keep asking myself "Is this all life is?". Life's been difficult.

Thank you to anyone who's read this or at least acknowledged it.