u/Business-Block-8668

Hello everyone! I am an 18 year old, soon to be 19 year old, college student. I recently started working at my city’s target. It is actually my first job ever. I am very excited to get out of the house and help my mom out.

I am a checkout advocate, and I enjoy my job a lot so far! I like scanning guests’ items, and having a positive attitude with them! I do have to constantly ask for help from other employees since I am new, but I didn’t come across any big problems so far.

I just found this sub a few minutes ago. Since I am a new employee at target, and new in the work force in general, I figure I join this sub and ask some questions I have about working at target, if that’s okay of course. My mom is also a target employee, and I ask her questions all the time, but I feel it wouldn’t hurt to ask from others too!

A lot of times, when I finish scanning the guests’ items, the target circle message pops up. The one that says “read this to our guests.” Normally I just read the first sentence of the message.

Am I supposed to read the whole message? Or is the first sentence good? Am I also supposed to know what target circle is? Not just read it, but know what it is to explain to guests if they ask about it? I am sure I have to, but if anyone can explain to me what target circle is, I would appreciate it!

Secondly, I ran into a guest that wanted to use their coupon when I was scanning their items. How do I use the coupon? Do I have to scan it and it’ll automatically take it (if not expired)? Or am I mistaken?

Thirdly, if you guys want to, what is your experience at target like? I know it’ll be different for everyone, but just out of curiosity. That’s all.

Thanks!

I get school accommodations. That’s…basically the only support I get from my mom.

Just to be clear, my mom is a good person. Most of the time she explains something I don’t understand in a nice way. She doesn’t discriminate me at all. She loves me.

But….the problem is, when it comes to me having a bad day and venting to her about someone at school, she tells me to “just ignore them” or “tune them out.” I even get “it’s all in the past and everything is good.” She says this to me when I have big conflicts that affect me physically and emotionally for weeks.

I keep telling her it’s not that easy. And she just doesn’t….understand. Also, in the past, whenever I was mad at my ex friend, she would do this “switch up” game. Basically, whenever my ex friend is with us and we have an argument, she responds to where it seems like she’s on her side of the conflict, even though my ex friend would be unnecessarily rude to me. Then, whenever my best friend leaves to go home, all of a sudden she’s like “I don’t know what her deal is.” LIKE PICK A SIDE WOMAN!

I also feel she doesn’t tell other family members to stop doing something towards me that I dislike. I would tell my mom that I don’t like if someone in my family is doing something to me, and I ask her to tell them to stop. I don’t know for sure if she actually tells them because I don’t hear or see her have the convo with them, but I feel she doesn’t actually talk to them.

And for some reason she gets mad when I have an attitude. She is always like “what is wrong with you?” or talks aggressively to me to cut it out. Sometimes I am not even mad because of her, and she still does this, when all I want to be is left alone and not talked to at the moment.

And don’t even get me started on my grandma. My grandma pisses me off everyday. I don’t even want to talk about her cause she is so annoying and doesn’t respect my boundaries.

This is pretty much why I hardly tell them stuff now

I love my mom and grandma but geez they can be too much.

Anyone else go through this?

I feel I am slowly starting to become this way.

All of my friendships, including someone I was friends with in 1st grade, and the friendship ending at the end of last year, were one sided, effortless, and just…made me feel undervalued.

I am going into my second year of college. I can’t tell if I don’t care about making friends or bonds forming due to how I was treated by my friends back then, or if it’s because I am not around these people everyday and I am just focusing on myself more in college. Or maybe both?

It’s like I am not even sad about it? Just…accepted it.

I am still upset by the constant treatment I received in the past.

It’s like….I feel more relaxed, neutral, and sad at the same time?

Random, but honestly I do enjoy going out by myself and doing activities by myself a lot. Probably a lot more than with other people. But I still like hanging with others.

Anyone else feel this way? Hopefully all of this made sense

I feel I am slowly starting to become this way.

All of my friendships, including someone I was friends with in 1st grade, and the friendship ending at the end of last year, were one sided, effortless, and just…made me feel undervalued.

I am going into my second year of college. I can’t tell if I don’t care about making friends or bonds forming due to how I was treated by my friends back then, or if it’s because I am not around these people everyday and I am just focusing on myself more in college. Or maybe both?

It’s like I am not even sad about it? Just…accepted it.

I am still upset by the constant treatment I received in the past.

It’s like….I feel more relaxed, neutral, and sad at the same time?

Random, but honestly I do enjoy going out by myself and doing activities by myself a lot. Probably a lot more than with other people. But I still like hanging with others.

Anyone else feel this way? Hopefully all of this made sense

This has happened a lot with me.

I thought about this particular situation today.

Why do friends leave a friend behind when walking? Like they would wait for everyone else except for you, and they would start walking without you.

This happened to me, even when we seemed like good friends on the outside, or when we thought we were cool.

Although idc about it anymore cause I gotten used to it and just don’t care, I still always found it strange.

Anyone have a clue why this happens? I always found this weird. Like why not walk with everyone in the friend group?

https://preview.redd.it/4ql5mzx2412h1.jpg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a379afb93ef4be39e385707189879923cf38ba4a

During childhood and up to now, I was always the last option in friend groups, in one sided friendships, always quiet and mostly by myself at school.

A lot of my friendships were one sided and I was the backup option. I was hardly ever thought of, even by my ex friend who I was friends with for 6+ years.

After I graduated high school, I started posting on TikTok that summer, and I gone viral on TikTok due to my personality and how I present myself online.

I still don’t have anyone to hang with irl. I am 18 about to be 19 in August.

Proof: https://imgur.com/a/ccXujz5

Ask me anything!

I had a very close best friend in elementary school. We were together constantly. Sleepovers, hanging out after school, cheer together, etc. She eventually moved to another state years ago.

The thing is, looking back as an adult, I’ve noticed some things.

Some things I remember is getting jealous when she hung out with other girls and friends, staring at her a lot in class, getting nervous just to say hi to her, caring deeply about her reactions to me, feeling embarrassed texting her, constantly wanting her attention, crying over small things involving her, and generally being very emotionally attached to her.

Even now, thinking about her or seeing her socials makes me weirdly tense or nervous.

What really triggered this realization is that I have had recurring dreams about her in the past 1-3 years. The dreams are almost always emotional, romantic, or intimate, and often take place in her house or room. In one dream I nervously denied having a crush on her while clearly lying. Another dream involved intimacy. Another involved us having sex.

They feel emotionally intense every time. What’s weird is I barely interact with her now and she’s lived in another state for years, yet my brain keeps bringing her back up. Even today in college and high school sometimes, when I see someone that looks similar to her, I always think of her.

I don’t know why this keeps happening or what all of this means. I am a lesbian btw.

Idk if I am supposed to flair this as an ableist rant but I did it just in case. Hopefully it’s okay.

It genuinely pisses me off and makes me angry. Why do they think people like us don’t exist?

Do they seriously think we are lying when we say we feel “different” from others?

Do they think everyone in the world is mentally and emotionally the same?

And it hurts to hear other neurodivergent people share that their parents or other family members would bash them for suspecting they have something. Like why are they so against it? They have no reason to be against their child being curious to get tested for something.

It’s so frustrating.

I’ve always been socially disconnected, even from kindergarten, or daycare up to now. I see a lot of autistic people talk about feeling out of place in school, being treated differently, not really fitting in, etc. That’s pretty much my experience too.

I’m curious if there are autistic people who weren’t like that.

Like, did any of y’all actually feel like you belonged? Had friends easily? We’re part of cliques? Or just not really socially excluded?

What was your school experience like?

And if things looked “normal” on the outside, did you still feel “different” from everyone even so? Or did you feel like you actually fit in?

It’s like my greatest friends and the ones I actually liked and had fun with were in elementary. After around 2nd grade, when I am in a friend group, I am always the third or 4th wheel depending how many people in the group. The last wheel for sure, and they just don’t interact with me or care to know stuff about me, hang with me, or even talk to me.

And I be talking to them and engage with them, but most of the time they just don’t respond and continue talking to their friends. Some even being disrespectful towards me and rude.

I’ve dealt with this issue all my life. Now that I am in college, I am kind of used to it. Still stings but I am happy I am not with those “friends” who stress me out everyday.

Idk if it’s because I am different from everyone or what. I don’t really too much care as much as I did in the past.

I am 18 in college. Turning 19 in 3 months.

I had a very close best friend in elementary school. We were together constantly. Sleepovers, hanging out after school, cheer together, etc. She eventually moved to another state years ago.

The thing is, looking back as an adult, I’ve noticed some things.

Some things I remember is getting jealous when she hung out with other girls and friends, staring at her a lot in class, getting nervous just to say hi to her, caring deeply about her reactions to me, feeling embarrassed texting her, constantly wanting her attention, crying over small things involving her, and generally being very emotionally attached to her.

Even now, thinking about her or seeing her socials makes me weirdly tense or nervous.

What really triggered this realization is that I have had recurring dreams about her in the past 1-3 years. The dreams are almost always emotional, romantic, or intimate, and often take place in her house or room. In one dream I nervously denied having a crush on her while clearly lying. Another dream involved intimacy. Another involved us having sex.

They feel emotionally intense every time. What’s weird is I barely interact with her now and she’s lived in another state for years, yet my brain keeps bringing her back up. Even today in college and high school sometimes, when I see someone that looks similar to her, I always think of her.

I don’t know why this keeps happening or what all of this means.

Like IDK WHY THEY LOOK WEIRD.

I would get weirded out by maps of the world or a country, and all the places and bodies of water labeled.

And the pool markers that say “3FT, 4FT, 5FT.”
Or just random measurements.

And you know when you search up something on google, sometimes it pops up the answer in big and bold text? It’s like it’s unexpected and I get a jump scare whenever that happens.

As a kid, I was very unsettled by these things. I would think about them whenever I was in the shower, and I would hurry up and get out of the shower so I can stop thinking about those things. Idk why. I’ve always been like that.

Now I am less reactive but still have that feeling from time to time.

Does anyone else go through something similar?

Like IDK WHY THEY LOOK WEIRD.

I would get weirded out by maps of the world or a country, and all the places and bodies of water labeled.

And the pool markers that say “3FT, 4FT, 5FT.”
Or just random measurements.

And you know when you search up something on google, sometimes it pops up the answer in big and bold text? It’s like it’s unexpected and I get a jump scare whenever that happens.

As a kid, I was very unsettled by these things. I would think about them whenever I was in the shower, and I would hurry up and get out of the shower so I can stop thinking about those things. Idk why. I’ve always been like that.

Now I am less reactive but still have that feeling from time to time.

Does anyone else go through something similar?

This happened my whole life and honestly I am kind of tired of it.

The people I would talk to in the past, and even now, would tell me random stuff that happened to them or about them. Nothing wrong with that obviously. I am fine with that

They vent A LOT to me as well. Idc if they vent to me every once in a while, but what irritates me is that they vent all the time to me about stuff, or just talk about them all the time, and they never ask me things. Not even a simple “how are you?” Just straight to talking about themselves, not even curious to get to know me. It happens in every convo I have with someone.

And normally I deeply think about things a lot, so when they vent to me, I just give them my opinion on their situation and give some advice. Or at least try to.

I am not even mad about this but geez I am tired of being used when needed.

Idk if I have trust issues to make me overthink every interaction or what. I ended a 6+ year friendship because it was one sided as hell and she was disrespectful towards me and treated me like a second option despite us being friends for years and always by each other basically.

I guess the only thing I can do is stop putting my energy into these people, but idk it’s like I feel bad everytime I don’t help them out or engage with them. I know it’s bad and I am probably a people pleaser because of this.

I always wonder why they can’t vent to their other friends as much as they vent to me. It’s just strange to me that they engage with their other friends more but come to me without even asking me how my day was or what’s happening with me, if that makes sense.

Any advice anyone has? How do I stop giving more than enough to others? Or anything else?

This happened my whole life and honestly I am kind of tired of it.

The people I would talk to in the past, and even now, would tell me random stuff that happened to them or about them. Nothing wrong with that obviously. I am fine with that

They vent A LOT to me as well. Idc if they vent to me every once in a while, but what irritates me is that they vent all the time to me about stuff, or just talk about them all the time, and they never ask me things. Not even a simple “how are you?” Just straight to talking about themselves, not even curious to get to know me. It happens in every convo I have with someone.

And normally I deeply think about things a lot, so when they vent to me, I just give them my opinion on their situation and give some advice. Or at least try to.

I am not even mad about this but geez I am tired of being used when needed.

Idk if I have trust issues to make me overthink every interaction or what. I ended a 6+ year friendship because it was one sided as hell and she was disrespectful towards me and treated me like a second option despite us being friends for years and always by each other basically.

I guess the only thing I can do is stop putting my energy into these people, but idk it’s like I feel bad everytime I don’t help them out or engage with them. I know it’s bad and I am probably a people pleaser because of this.

I always wonder why they can’t vent to their other friends as much as they vent to me. It’s just strange to me that they engage with their other friends more but come to me without even asking me how my day was or what’s happening with me, if that makes sense.

Any advice anyone has? How do I stop giving more than enough to others? Or anything else?

This happened my whole life and honestly I am kind of tired of it.

The people I would talk to in the past, and even now, would tell me random stuff that happened to them or about them. Nothing wrong with that obviously. I am fine with that

They vent A LOT to me as well. Idc if they vent to me every once in a while, but what irritates me is that they vent all the time to me about stuff, or just talk about them all the time, and they never ask me things. Not even a simple “how are you?” Just straight to talking about themselves, not even curious to get to know me. It happens in every convo I have with someone.

And normally I deeply think about things a lot, so when they vent to me, I just give them my opinion on their situation and give some advice. Or at least try to.

I am not even mad about this but geez I am tired of being used when needed.

Idk if I have trust issues to make me overthink every interaction or what. I ended a 6+ year friendship because it was one sided as hell and she was disrespectful towards me and treated me like a second option despite us being friends for years and always by each other basically.

I guess the only thing I can do is stop putting my energy into these people, but idk it’s like I feel bad everytime I don’t help them out or engage with them. I know it’s bad and I am probably a people pleaser because of this.

I always wonder why they can’t vent to their other friends as much as they vent to me. It’s just strange to me that they engage with their other friends more but come to me without even asking me how my day was or what’s happening with me, if that makes sense.

Any advice anyone has? How do I stop giving more than enough to others? Or anything else?

This happenes to me all the time but it happened to me today and I stayed in the same position for a while.

It’s like everytime someone yells at me, I stay in the same position for a minute, or even a few hours, just processing the interaction.

I am sensitive to raised and aggressive tone. And this only happens with other people besides my mom and grandma, including strangers. Well sometimes it happens with my mom and grandma but not as much as with others.

Everytime this happens, I stay in the same spot, same position, just processing, and end up not doing whatever I planned to do at the moment.

And I am always embarrassed all the time as well.

Does anyone else do the same thing? Or something similar?

It’s like I can’t even move without feeling embarrassed. I just….freeze.

This happenes to me all the time but it happened to me today and I stayed in the same position for a while.

It’s like everytime someone yells at me, I stay in the same position for a minute, or even a few hours, just processing the interaction.

I am sensitive to raised and aggressive tone. And this only happens with other people besides my mom and grandma, including strangers. Well sometimes it happens with my mom and grandma but not as much as with others.

Everytime this happens, I stay in the same spot, same position, just processing, and end up not doing whatever I planned to do at the moment.

And I am always embarrassed all the time as well.

Does anyone else do the same thing? Or something similar?

It’s like I can’t even move without feeling embarrassed. I just….freeze.

This happenes to me all the time but it happened to me today and I stayed in the same position for a while.

It’s like everytime someone yells at me, I stay in the same position for a minute, or even a few hours, just processing the interaction.

I am sensitive to raised and aggressive tone. And this only happens with other people besides my mom and grandma, including strangers. Well sometimes it happens with my mom and grandma but not as much as with others.

Everytime this happens, I stay in the same spot, same position, just processing, and end up not doing whatever I planned to do at the moment.

And I am always embarrassed all the time as well.

Does anyone else do the same thing? Or something similar?

It’s like I can’t even move without being embarrassed, and I just….freeze.

I am autistic and in the process of testing for adhd. Just wanted to throw that out there